A STRANGER
A/N: Dear friends, this is my belated contribution to the Christmas story challenge entitled "A stranger". I hope that despite its lateness, you'll still enjoy the story.
Pairing: Alexander/Hephaistion.
Realm: this is AU story, please treat it as such.
Comments: Will be greatly appreciated and treasured.
Nothing seemed to make Alexander happy these days. He felt tired, frustrated and dissatisfied with everything. He gave commands, people hurried to obey them but the result was never what Alexander wanted. The food was tasteless, the entertainment dull, the jokes humorless. His friends' attempts to cheer him up ended with Alexander's mood spiralled even deeper into some vortex of pointlessness and hollowness. He talked in short, order like sentences, he snapped at his pages and servants without any apparent reason and nobody was safe from his flashes of anger and bad temper.
The most maddening thing to Alexander was the fact that he could plainly see on the people faces that they had absolutely no doubt as to what to attribute this foul mood of their king. Not in so distant past his continued relationship with Hephaistion was a matter of sometimes silly, sometimes rude but mostly good natured jokes from most of the people; there were those, of course, who accused Hephaistion of being a bad influence over Alexander and plainly denounced him as being a sycophant and bed boy of the king. And yet even those people dared now to give advice to Alexander to mend his relationship with his beloved general. All the spite, the contempt, the animosity were forgotten, only to get their king in a better mood.
Alexander himself wished nothing else, nothing else but to have his Hephaistion back, with all his love, and understanding, and comfort. He simply didn't know how to achieve this. "Why wouldn't you start with getting rid of Bagoas?" Alexander remembered his recent conversation with Ptolemy. The general was of course right, but Alexander's relationship with Hephaistion started to deteriorate even before Bagoas was in picture. Alexander could never feel himself a true king in Hephaistion presence, he was just Alexander, a crown prince from Pella desperately in love with his best friend without whose existence life didn't seem possible at all.
But the more cities Alexander conquered, the more people bowed to him in reverence or fear, the more he felt that his love for Hephaistion was the last hindrance to becoming the Great King, the King who lacks nothing, the King who fears nothing, the King who has no weaknesses, no vulnerabilities, no dependencies. It drove him mad that he still loved Hephaistion, that he couldn't imagine his life without Hephaistion at his side, and that his friend continued to love him despite everything. Alexander wished nothing more but to be together with Hephaistion, to share his problems, to bask in his love, to simply fall asleep and wake up in his hands, but he stubbornly and purposely denied himself this pleasure driving himself and everybody else insane.
His relationship with Hephaistion became some crazy dance that Alexander performed in plain view of this whole army – Alexander spurned any attempts from Hephaistion side to mend the rift responding viciously with lavishing his attention on Bagoas in everybody presence; however when Eumenus suggested to send Hephaistion away on some long mission, Alexander almost killed his secretary for even bringing forth such an idea. He tormented Hephaistion by being sometimes extremely rude, sometimes completely ignoring his presence or comments during the meetings; he would invite Hephaistion to spend time with him in the evening and made sure that Bagoas was present when Hephaistion came and pretended that he forgot about the invitation and said that he was too tired to spend time with Hephaistion and ask him to come another time. He tried to push Hephaistion away so that the final break wouldn't be his fault but so far Hephaistion stoically withstood everything that Alexander threw his way and Alexander spent most of his nights not so much accepting Bagoas caresses as crying himself into sleep.
This evening was no different from many others recently. Alexander publicly invited Hephaistion to visit him later tonight. General politely bowed and excused himself to attend to some urgent matter in meantime. Alexander lingered for some time in the banquet room and then announced his leave giving rather loud instructions to bring Bagoas to his bedchamber. He saw Ptolemy, Leonnatus and Perdiccas sigh and turn their heads away, Krateros and Eumenus shrug their shoulders and continue their conversation, others mostly tried to fake indifference to the whole event resigning themselves to enduring another day of Alexander in a foul mood.
Alexander sat on the bed waiting for the familiar scene to play itself before his eyes – Bagoas would come and start making love to him, Hephaistion would arrive later, reproachfully look at his former lover in the hands of the other, may be say something and then leave. Sometimes Hephaistion would make a scene but realizing that Bagoas was watching two of them with somewhat polite indifference, he would immediately stop and leave without further words. There were times when Alexander wished Hephaistion would simply kill Bagoas, then beat Alexander into unconsciousness and in the morning everything would return to normal.
Alexander closed his eyes and imagined the scene again. The beautiful body of Bagoas beaten into unrecognizable pulp by enraged Hephaistion was sprawled in some distorted position on a floor and the beautiful general with murder in his eyes standing over Alexander ready to deal the first blow. Alexander wanted to accept that first merciless blow looking directly into the eyes of his lover. Waking from his reverie Alexander opened his eyes only to realize that he played the scene again in his mind and that the room was empty. "Bagoas should have been here by now," dully thought Alexander when he noticed the slender hand of the eunuch gliding vertically along the heavy curtain at the entrance to the bedchamber.
"Don't waste my time, Bagoas," impatiently said the king," I don't want your seducing games tonight." The hand immediately stopped in its movement and slender leg appeared from behind the curtain.
"Bagoas," threateningly hissed Alexander.
The person behind the curtain stepped forward but it wasn't Bagoas. Alexander stared with surprise and admiration at the unknown young man. He was slender though his body was a little more curvaceous than Bagoas', he had beautiful blond and slightly wavy hair reaching just a little below his shoulder blades, his eyes were of the most extravagant almond shape with incredible green colour framed by beautiful eyelashes. He silently made a few steps in Alexander direction and stood before the king. Alexander suddenly felt a wave of the strongest desire wash over his body leaving him powerless and trembling before this beautiful stranger.
"Who are you?" weakly asked Alexander, trying with his shaky hands to lower the youth to his own level to look directly into his eyes and caress his body.
"My name is Eldor," timidly answered young man, "Bagoas fell suddenly ill and I asked the Chief Eunuch to be sent to you instead."
"I am very glad, I am very glad of that," murmured the king as he tried to kiss the young man fully on the lips and at the same time having his hands roaming Eldor's body. The youth hesitantly let his lips part and put his arms around the king neck. Alexander was so consumed by his sudden passion that he didn't realize how tense was the young man body and when king's fingers reached only slightly hard member of the youth, Eldor suddenly gasped and disentangled himself from the king embrace.
"You are not a eunuch," Alexander said almost accusatory.
Eldor shook his head in a negative response.
"Have you ever been with a man?" asked the king.
"No," whispered Eldor and shook his head again.
Alexander felt his desire web away as suddenly as it consumed him just moments ago.
"What you are doing here then? Why did you asked to be sent to me when you have no desire or inclination to share my bed?"
"I am so sorry, Great King," answered the young man, his voice fearful, his lower lip trembling and a big tear slowly gliding down from his beautiful eye. "I hoped that I can come through this ordeal and that you would be so happy with my services and pay me generously enough so that I can hire a best doctor for my wife."
"Your wife?" incredulously asked Alexander. "You are married? How old are you?"
"I am sixteen, and yes, I am married. I love my wife dearly and would die without her."
"What happened to her, why she is sick? Don't you or your wife have a family to help you out?" Alexander looked attentively at the young man. He was too well cared for and held himself with too much grace and dignity to be some poor soul living on the streets.
"I have a family, an old and noble one, and I never lacked anything in my life. Only I fell in love with one of my mother servants. I loved her so much, that we run away, got secretly married but I lost all my family and all means of existence as a result. My mother cursed us and I am not welcome anymore at our estate. Of course, despite everything, I believe that my mother still loves me and she would be only too happy if my wife dies and I return home and everything will be back to normal. But I love my wife, she is my soul, I would die without her and I am ready to sacrifice my own life for her sake. My wife became sick some time ago and I don't know how to help her. I was at the bazaar this morning looking for a doctor but I don't have enough means left to hire someone knowledgeable enough to help her. I am quite aware of my good looks and I thought that I can at least sell my body to save my wife's life. I was lucky enough to come to the attention of the people who brought me to Chief Eunuch."
Eldor approached the king again and fell on his knees. "Please forgive me, my king, for being so bold, but I know that there is a person in this world whom you love as much as I love my wife. There is nothing I can give you in return but for the sake of this love, I implore you to ask one of your doctors to check on my wife. I am sure that they can heal her. You will have my eternal gratitude and I will pray to the gods daily for your well being."
"My well being is fine," sighed the king. "but I lost the love of my soul mate and I doubt that anyone's prayers can bring it back."
"How do you know that? How do you know that you are not loved anymore? Did you stop loving him as well?"
"No, I didn't stop loving him, though sometimes I wish that I did so, but our relationship became so sour that I don't know how to mend it, each time I try to rekindle our love, I only make the situation worse, it's like some evil spirit lives inside me and I don't know how to expel him."
"May be you don't need to expel the evil spirit, may be you just need to allow Hephaistion back into your heart and this evil spirit will leave on its own."
"I don't know how to do that anymore but I am glad that there is someone whose life I can save."
Alexander carefully helped Eldor from his knees and invited him to sit on his bed. Then he called his page on duty and asked him to find and bring his personal physician to him right away.
"Philip is an excellent doctor, I have no doubt that he can help your wife. Tell me about her in meantime and about you family as well, may be I will be able to mend your relationship at least."
"I truly hope that your doctor can save my wife life, as for restoring my mother love for me and having her accept my wife, it's a futile attempt, even for a king. As a young woman, my mother was exceptionally beautiful and enjoyed the attention and love of many rich, powerful and beautiful young men. She wasn't very chaste in her ways and gave her love freely, she still does. However, it's not what she wants for me. She said that she would never accept one of her former servants as her daughter-in-law and even such a powerful king as you can do nothing to convince her otherwise."
"Well, then, may be after your wife is well again, both of you can follow my army. I am sure that I can find something to do for both of you, if only to look at your love and remember the one that I once had myself."
"You should still give it a try; surely, you can't abandon such a treasure without a fight?" Eldor faintly smiled and put his hand on king's cheek. Alexander sadly sighed and closed his eyes. The image of smiling and happy Hephaistion beckoning him invitingly from somewhere was interrupted suddenly by the implacable and merciless voice of said Hephaistion whose face was clearly devoid of any smiles or happiness.
"Indulging in a new toy?" coldly asked Hephaistion.
"It's not what you think," hastily said Alexander jumping from the bed.
"Well, then, I have to admit, I possess a rather poor imagination," Hephaistion continued dispassionately. "Can I leave, now that I saw everything you wanted me to see?"
"You are right, I invited you yet again to witness Bagoas presence in my bed, but he is sick today." Alexander was surprised at the calmness of his tone and lack of smoldering rage that usually grasped his being in those moments. He couldn't quite understand why he was telling such a thing to Hephaistion now, usually he would dismiss the general haughtily advising him to come at the more convenient moment.
"I see," wearily said Hephaistion, "you want my opinion of your new possession?"
"He is not my new possession," quietly responded Alexander. "This young man came to me asking for a physician for his sick wife," Alexander decided that a little white lie won't hurt. "We're just waiting for Philip's arrival."
"Whatever you say," Hephaistion turned around to leave.
"My lord Hephaistion," suddenly said Eldor, "I truly don't have any intentions of attracting any personal favors with the king, except for his help with a physician, please believe me, I have no reason to lie. My only concern is to save my wife's life. I came to the king hoping that he, of all people, would understand that for the sake of one's true love, a person would be ready to sacrifice everything, including his own life; don't you agree?"
Alexander came closer to Hephaistion and tentatively touched his hand, "Please, stay with me tonight. No one will interrupt us, I swear to gods. I… we…may be we can talk some things through. I feel so desperate, I don't know what's wrong with me, and I need your help. Please?"
Hephaistion looked at the king. It was definitely the different Alexander to which he got used to recently. It was Alexander from a long time ago, fearfully resurfacing from the distant and now almost unbelievable past. Was there indeed a chance that their relationship can be revived to the point when they resume treating one another as Alexander and Hephaistion and not as a king and his fallen out of favor general?
At that moment Philip the physician came and Alexander asked him to go with the young man to check on his wife. Philip frowned on such a strange request but agreed. Eldor was happy to leave with him immediately but took his time to express his best wishes to Hephaistion and then came closer to Alexander.
"I don't possess any valuables to thank you for your generosity and yet I wish to give you a gift from all my heart," with those words he took something from his rather scanty clothes and gave Alexander some small object wrapped in a piece of fine wool.
"Some years ago a young man came to my mother asking for love; she felt generous that day and granted him his wish. He gave her this ring. It's a crude piece of jewelry but it is a token of love. I want you to keep it." And with those words the young man disappeared in Philip's company.
Hephaistion stood uncertainly in the middle of the king bedchamber. Once it was more familiar to him than any other surroundings but now he felt a stranger here, not sure how much he was welcomed and how sincere that welcome was.
Alexander felt nervous too and decided to lighten up the situation by examining the ring.
"Eldor said that his mother was quite a beauty in her young years and enjoyed favors from many rich and powerful men. She probably was a very famous hetaera. Let's see if this ring is indeed as crude as her son described it. May be I will like it for myself," Alexander was surprised how easily he managed to sustain a friendly conversation with Hephaistion without succumbing to some unexpected bout of anger and viciousness. With inclination of his head Alexander invited his friend to sit beside him on the bed and started to unwrap the unexpected gift.
Hephaistion sat near Alexander, his heart beating frantically inside his chest. It was unbelievingly long time since they sat so close to each other, that they were in peace with each other and not exchanging insults or disdainful comments as the only means of communication. Was it really possible that because of some stranger was courageous enough to ask for king's help to save his sick wife, their own very much strained relationship would return to normal?
Hephaistion looked at Alexander and saw with surprise tears flowing freely down the king cheeks. He brought up his hand and tried to dry the tears away with the tips of his fingers. "Why are you crying, my love?" tenderly asked Hephaistion.
Alexander started to sob and then threw himself at Hephaistion, lavishing on him countless kisses and laughing at the same time.
"What is it? What's happening to you?" asked Hephaistion with astonishment at such strange but at the same time very welcoming behavior.
"I love you, I love you so much," Alexander continued to kiss Hephaistion. "I was such an idiot, I don't know what possessed me to behave as such an asshole. You are my love, you are my life, you are my very soul. How could I do all those awful things to you? Will you ever forgive me?"
"I may be tempted to do so," happily smiled Hephaistion. "But I think you owe me some explanation. Do you really believe that you still need my love or it's some sort of a sick game with Bagoas and may be others watching behind the curtains?"
Alexander was appalled that Hephaistion could suspect such a thing but then realized that his lover has all the right to question his sudden change in attitude.
"It is not a game, I meant every single word of what I said and I am going to prove it to you. See this ring?" and with those words Alexander gave that really rather crude piece of jewelry to Hephaistion. "See the letters on the inside?"
Hephaistion took the ring and examined it. To his surprise he saw the letters "H" and "A" engraved on the inner side of the ring.
"What does it mean?" confusingly asked Hephaistion.
"This is my ring. I made it myself many years ago in Pella when I first realized how much I loved you and how desperately I needed you love me back."
"And you gave that ring to hetaera who happened to be that young man mother?"
Alexander's face became very solemn suddenly. "Yes, I believe that many years ago I gave this ring to this young man mother. Only I think his name is not Eldor, and though I did ask his mother for love, it was your love I asked for."
"My love? I don't understand."
"I dedicated this ring to Aphrodite."