A/N: So, it's not a continuation of my first FFXIV story...it's something that started as a stray thought, that I then wondered about some funny situations, and then grew a story so that I could actually use them. While I do have some time in my busy life for writing, sadly very few pieces ever see completion and none ever reach a point I'm wholly satisfied with. This story is one of the rare few and so here we are.
Chapter 1: Pony Farm
Haurchefant was a bit stumped. He wanted to gift the Warrior of Light something, to show his appreciation for all she had done for Ishgard and House Fortemps. Supporting her and the remaining Scions had been a gamble that had paid off well, increasing their reputation and improving their connections. Well, that was the official reason he'd give to anyone who questioned it. Unofficially he truly, sincerely appreciated what she selflessly did for Eorzea as a whole and felt she deserved more than any gift he could give, but some show of gratitude was better than none.
The issue was: what to get her? Something frivolously impractical would be less than useless to her and just take up space with her retainers, probably even thrown out to make room for more useful things to be brutally honest. There were small things he already did, ensuring she had warm meals and hot chocolates and a prime, quiet spot by the hearth whenever she visited Camp Dragonhead to name a few. And while the little things add up he wanted a grander gesture. Going too practical also had its downsides however; her armour already seemed better quality than anything their smiths could produce, same with her weapons, and he was hardly going to approve of her using lesser gear because it was a gift.
He was drawn out of his contemplations by a commotion outside. Curious, he stood and left his desk to see what was going on. It didn't sound like an attack, more like…mild panic and major confusion as opposed to urgent alarm.
Several archers had their arrows trained on the speck of light that was approaching, several lancers were strategically placing themselves within the fort, and everyone else were all staring at whatever was incoming. Haurchefant squinted and was able to make out the fact that whatever it was had a rider, and they didn't appear to be some sort of voidsent. He relaxed once they drew closer and he recognized the Warrior of Light on a…horse?
It was the strangest mount he had ever seen; the pony galloped into the courtyard before slowing to a stop, glanced around at the knights, tossed its head dismissively and then trotted regally over to Haurchefant, who couldn't help but stare. The pony was glowing with aether; literally its mane and tail glowed and thanks to the light snow on the ground he could see the swirling winds around its hooves. And astride it sat the Warrior of Light, smiling at him as if nothing were wrong and well, perhaps it wasn't, but that didn't mean nothing strange was going on.
"Welcome back, my dear friend!" Haurchefant greeted, deciding to play it casual. "And you have a new…pony?" He guessed. It certainly looked like a horse.
The smile widened and she nodded in affirmation, sliding off the mount's back and gently patting its neck.
"May I ask where you acquired it?" Haurchefant continued. The world was a vast place, perhaps on her many adventures to the edges of Eorzea she had stumbled across it.
"From Garuda."
Haurchefant blanched. "As in…the primal?" He asked hesitantly.
She nodded, and with excited hand gestures accompanying her words, recounted her tale of battling Garuda's most powerful incarnation yet and how after the battle she found a whistle. Upon blowing it, the wind aether-attuned pony had appeared. "I call him Xanthos." She finished.
Haurchefant warily eyed the horse, who was staring at him in a condescending manner at a level usually reserved by purebred cats and Ishgardian nobles. "I see."
Well, at least he and his knights would be prepared the next time she arrived on that horse.
…Except the next time, she didn't arrive on that horse.
-o-o-O-o-o-
Haurchefant heard a small commotion and got a sense of déjà vu as he stepped outside to see archers training arrows on a glowing speck in the distance, lancers getting into position, and everyone else finding a good vantage point to see what was coming. The features became more distinguishable from a mere glow the closer it got.
It was a glowing horse.
A glowing horse with a rider.
A glowing horse with the Warrior of Light on it.
Never let it be said that Haurchefant was not quick on the uptake as he wondered, since the colour of the aether was different, which primal spawned this particular mount.
The thundering of hooves even on snow-covered ground sounded like the crashing of rocks down a mountainside. Small rocks orbited the aether-streams around the hooves, and the dark horse's lips drew back in a vicious sneer aimed at every mortal in the general area.
Haurchefant didn't even know horses could sneer.
"Welcome back, my friend." He greeted nonetheless, the coil of trepidation in him unwinding when the Warrior of Light sent him a warm and rather radiant smile back. "I see you have obtained another pony."
She nodded. "From Titan. This is Gullfaxi." She dismounted and began telling the rather fascinating tale of yet another fight between her and a primal.
Haurchefant listened intently and it was only later that he wondered why on earth a primal would even bother summoning a mount that had been sacrificed to them; it wasn't like kobalds were suddenly riding aether ponies about.
Still, he prayed no other beast tribes had tried sacrificing mounts to their gods. Two were enough, thank you.
-o-o-O-o-o-
The Fury was ignoring him, Haurchefant thought. It was either that or laughing at him. Why else would he be staring at the Warrior of Light on yet another pony?
The smell of ozone filled the courtyard as soft crackles could be heard from the blue-white lightning dancing around the horse's hooves. The purple pony pranced around lightly, the sound of its steps like the sharp crackle before the boom of a clap of thunder.
"That's Markab." The Warrior of Light explained with a fond smile at the pony.
Haurchefant was a little jealous about that, but didn't let it show and instead kept his focus on her as he listened avidly to the latest tale of battle against a Primal. Ramuh sounded rather nice and reasonable compared to the others…
(He didn't notice how Markab's eyes narrowed, how he gave a little snort, and then began trotting around the courtyard in a deliberately nonchalant manner towards his back.)
A sudden shock made him yelp and jump.
"Markab!" The reproachful call of the pony's name by its owner was met with a petulant whinny.
Haurchefant stared at the purple pony who was looking entirely too satisfied with himself. He knew that the attention of the lady before him was highly coveted, but he never thought he'd be competing with a horse for it!
"I do apologize for him, Haurchefant." The Warrior of Light said, her lips twitching trying to hide a smile and failing. "Markab is a bit of a prankster, he gets that from the Sylphs I'm afraid."
"Forgiven, seeing as he has made you laugh." Haurchefant replied magnanimously. "Although I do believe that you aren't the only one." He glanced around at his soldiers; some were wearing admirably blank poker faces, others had lowered their visors to hide their faces, and the last were unsuccessfully trying to hold back grins.
He didn't sense anything amiss with his clothing or armour as he gave his body a cursory examination. It was when his hands moved up to his head that he felt his hair was standing up from static. "Ah, so that's it." He chuckled. A harmless prank, all said and done…There was a snort from behind him. Splendid, even the horse was laughing at him.
The Warrior of Light's eyes were sparkling in amused fondness as she gestured for him to lean down. Haurchefant obliged curiously, only to blink in surprise when her hands gently began combing through his hair to neaten it once more. He nearly closed his eyes at the feeling of nails gently scraping his scalp. All too soon—but still a little later than was probably appropriate considering they were out in the open with an audience—her hands left his hair.
Markab could prank him anytime if this was the result; Haurchefant felt like the last one laughing in this exchange.
-o-o-O-o-o-
How many primals had the Warrior of Light fought again…? Haurchefant wondered as yet another pony ran into camp. If he remembered how many primals she had faced then he'd have an idea of just how many ponies he had left to deal with. He hoped there weren't that many; he was becoming accustomed to them and that was probably not good since each one meant yet another harrowing fight against a primal.
It wasn't too difficult to guess the elemental nature of this pony. It may be cold in Ishgard but Haurchefant did know what waves crashing against the shore sounded like; the stamping hooves were like a tsunami. Fortunately instead of looking as vicious as the Titan pony, this one was…sulking?
"Is he alright?" Haurchefant asked the Warrior of Light as he watched the horse kick at the ground with a foot and shake its head with a rumbling whinny that sounded like a grumble more than anything.
The Warrior of Light sent a commiserating glance at her horse. "Enbarr will be fine. He just hates the cold."
"So then why ride him here?" Haurchefant asked, and it was only partly due to curiosity; the other part was wondering if the pony hated it so much why not keep it away from the camp so it was one less aether pony he had to deal with.
"He also dislikes all the other ponies and refused to be the odd one out who didn't get to show off to the camp." She explained.
"I see…" Haurchefant blanched as the pony went over to the brazier in the middle of the courtyard and ran over it, water promptly extinguishing the flames. "Let me guess…if he has to be cold then we do too?" He asked, shaking his head in resignation.
The Warrior of Light looked sheepish as she nodded. "He doesn't like people."
"Do any of those ponies of yours like people…?"
He wasn't very reassured when the answer was a thoughtful, contemplative silence.
-o-o-O-o-o-
It had been a while since her last visit, so when the Warrior of Light returned this time on another pony Haurchefant didn't even spare a moment to be dismayed. Not even the obvious ice primal origin of this pony would deter him from his good mood as he firmly ignored the sounds of cracking ice that were hooves striking the ground. "My dear you are a sight for sore eyes!" He declared as he spread his arms in greeting and gave her a wide smile.
"Has there been trouble?" She asked in concern as she dismounted, clearly seeing the signs of stress and lack of sleep around his eyes.
"Nothing that we can't handle I assure you." Haurchefant replied. "Your radiance is like a balm to the weary."
She smiled bashfully and it only proved Haurchefant correct as he felt his heart lighten despite his tiredness.
Then the whitish blue pony sniffed and shuffled in place, tossing its head back and standing tall and proud as its mane danced in the air like a localized blizzard. It gave Haurchefant an expectant look.
"This is Boreas, and it seems he approves of your charm."
Haurchefant would rather lay the charm on the pony's owner, but at least she was now recognizing his flirting with her as being charming. It was a point in his favour so he decided to humour them and complimented Boreas on his regal bearing and coat that was a match for the purest snow.
This one was by far the vainest of the horses Haurchefant had met, both aether and normal, but at least it didn't seem to hate people on sight.
-o-o-O-o-o-
Haurchefant stared down uncertainly at the form that he had drafted to request a black chocobo from House Fortemps to be gifted to the Warrior of Light. Once he signed it and set things into motion, he'd probably have to do some very good and quick justification about why he'd even consider letting an 'outsider' have one from their flying flock that they had been specially breeding for generations. It could put him into a tight spot and bring him under a lot of scrutiny.
Maybe there was something else he could gift her…there had to be another practical and yet still extravagant gift to give…
His thoughts were interrupted by the doors slamming open as a knight rushed in.
"Sir! The Warrior of Light has returned! And uh, just forewarning you Sir, but the horse is a bit…on fire."
Haurchefant glanced outside to see said horse (he later learned the name was Aithon) stampeding into camp, leaving a blazing trail of hellfire and damnation everywhere its hooves fell and glaring at everyone indiscriminately like it wanted to brutally murder them all and didn't care who went first so long as they burned. Turning back to his desk, Haurchefant signed the paper with a flourish and a smile. She was getting a black chocobo. Period.
Aside 1: Bird Farm
Haurchefant looked up as the doors were flung open and a foot soldier ran in.
"Sir! There's a glowing bird approaching!"
Oh dear.
Aside 1.5: Kirin
"Never mind, sir, false alarm; it's still a glowing pony. A glowing flying pony, granted, but a pony all the same."
Haurchefant buried his face in his hands and laughed. Of course it was.