I couldn't believe what I had done. I killed someone; these were the words I never thought I could say about myself. I couldn't even begin to imagine the lives that I destroyed. No one understood how I felt, I wasn't sure if I could live with myself. I didn't know what or who to turn too, all I know is I need to do something about this internal agony before it overcomes me. I felt myself begin to distant myself from my family and friends not wanting to grab them down this mess.
I walked up to Ezra's apartment hoping that my heart and soul would begin to glow again as it always did when I was around him. I knocked on the door feeling hopeful that he would help the pain go away just he had always done.
"Hey," I said as he opened the door.
"Hey, please come in," Ezra said smiling.
"I need to tell you something," I said full of agony as tears starting streaming down my face.
"Aria what is it," Ezra asked full of worry as he held my hands.
"I was the one who killed Shana. It all happened so fast, I didn't know what I was doing until it happened. I didn't know who else to come too," I said shaking.
Ezra grabbed me and held me as I shook. He brushed his hand in my hair trying to help me calm down.
"Aria, I will always see you the same. No matter what you do, I will always be there for you" Ezra said smiling.
I was happy that I had someone like him to help me but I still didn't feel any different than before. I wasn't sure why. Someone still loved me for what I had done, so why couldn't I move on or at least feel somewhat better?
I left his apartment wanting to feel alive again. Beeeeeeeep. I grabbed my phone. I know what you did. You better watch your back if you don't want me to spill the beans. -A
I decided not to go home; I couldn't face my family yet. I didn't know what to do but I knew that somehow A was going to somehow break me down and was getting the best of me. I guess Shana wasn't A or was she a part of the team? Who is A? Before I knew it I was buying weed and alcohol. I just wanted to somehow cope whatever the cost maybe. The feeling of being high and going into another dimension was what I needed, it gave me the feeling I wanted and needed. It made me able to cope and made me feel alive. As I looked at myself in the mirror I noticed I liked this Aria better than the sad, helpless one.
I arrived the next day at school. I tried to act normal even though I was sure people could see right through me. Before I knew it Jason caught my hand, pulling me into his office.
"Aria, what is going on with you," Jason asked sternly.
"Nothing, why," I said in frustration.
"You don't think I don't know a resemblance to how you're acting to how I acted in high school," Jason said.
"And your point," I snapped.
"This isn't who you are. Whatever you are going through can be handled in a different way," Jason responded calmly even though anger soured through his body thinking what Aria was doing to herself.
"Jason this is none of your business and for you information it is the only way. Stop acting like you know me," I grumbled as I left his office.
I walked out of the school halls and drove out of Rosewood not looking back. I went to a lake 20 miles outside of Rosewood. I just looked at the scenery unsure of what to do and who trust. I began to smoke and drink unaware of my surroundings. I walked into the lake and began to allow myself to float. When I got back and took my beer and sipped it. I quickly dropped the beer. Boom the bottle went as it broke went crashing into the ground. I started to feel my throat close up and tried crawling trying to get to my car before I knew it my mind went blank and my eyes closed….
As a black figure watched her they laughed as she was going unconscious knowing their plan was started to unravel.