Since writing has been sporadic for me, at best, the last few years...I was happy to find this little short already completed. Hope you enjoy it.
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CJ stared out her office window at the LA skyline. The strings of a Spanish guitar instrumental played in the background, while the clouds danced behind the buildings' peaks. She didn't have much interest in working, today. She'd rather give into her contemplative mood.
A year ago, Matt was set to marry Elizabeth, and the investigative part of their work was going by the wayside. Yet, within mere hours, those plans were upended - and everything switched back to normal, almost as if nothing had happened. She wished she could say that it was a good thing, but it hadn't felt like it.
Houston had been ready to turn away from something he loved - from a big part of who he was - but as soon as the wedding was called off, it was as if nothing had never happened. It befuddled her how easily he had switched gears because they'd all be along for the ride, and it hadn't been fun.
He took a couple of weeks to clear his head, but when he returned, it was business as usual. It unsettled CJ, and the more time that went by, the less inclined she was to stick around because she knew that it could happen again.
So, was she going to sit and wait for the next time her life would be turned upside down because of his? No. She couldn't imagine the woman Houston married being pleased that he risked life and limb on a regular basis. Most women, like Elizabeth, would be loathe to it and want him to quit.
All that being said, CJ's own feelings were important. Her life was affected by the decisions he made, and she wasn't going to wait around for anymore shoes to drop. She wouldn't let him or anyone else dictate how her life would unfold.
She was compartmentalized as his friend, and knowing it made her foolhardy to sacrifice the life she was craving to stay near to him. She should stop waiting and hoping that he'd change his mind.
She'd told him that she loved him more than once, let him know what he meant to her, and...nothing. She sometimes felt the heat of embarrassment in her cheeks just thinking about it. Finally, she recognized that it wasn't about bad timing. Her feelings were one-sided, and she was coming to terms with it. Plus, it was entirely possible that - if things were to progress between them - they wouldn't even be compatible in that way.
She was pondering what she wanted to do with her life. She didn't want to watch the parade go by. Truth be told, she was bored with the legal work, here - also a big reason why she'd rather be staring out of her window, today. As if on cue, a big yawn took her by surprise and left her stretching it out.
She yawned once more and closed her eyes. She wasn't comfortable with being a supporting character, even though she was finally okay with only being friends. Hell, she wasn't even a cool sidekick, anymore. She laughed out loud at that thought. Still, what she wanted was to be the star of her own life.
"Yes," she said aloud.
Now, she had to decide if she could do so and still work at Houston, Inc. or if it would be counterproductive. She feared that her habit of putting Houston and the office first would be too hard to break, if she stuck around - and not because she couldn't do it but because it would be hard for others to accept the changes that she intended to make.
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When she told him that she was leaving, he was truly disappointed. He was used to her being there on a daily basis. He loved seeing her smile and hearing her laughter regularly, but he didn't want to hold her back from her dreams. After all, she'd helped him achieve his.
Because of this, he was certain he'd be content knowing that he was doing what he could to help her be happy.
Of course, he was fine, but he missed her terribly.
Since she had felt the need to leave, he often wondered about the times she'd told him that she loved him. He questioned if she had really been telling him that she was in love with him. In the moments, he'd thought that she'd been reaffirming their bond. His mind couldn't tune in to the possibility of more between them.
What if it blew up in their faces? What then?
Regardless of all that, they spoke frequently and stayed caught up in one another's lives. They even hung out as often as they could, but it wasn't the same. Sometimes, he even felt a little lonely in her presence. Something was missing - the easy camaraderie he'd taken for granted - and he wasn't sure how to get it back.
He loved her and would never mean to hurt her. But, what if he had? And, what if things would never be the same between them?
As he sat in his office, he stared at the LA skyline to help soothe the raw edges of his emotions. Things weren't bad, but they weren't good, either.
What was there to do about it?
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Houston had had no intention of confessing his feelings for her right here and now, but, it had been a long time since anything had felt this right. He took the plunge.
Dust and dirt swirled around them, and years spun backward in his mind's eye. He was once again standing with his best friend on the working ranch - just the two of them, again, and it felt like every feeling he had ever felt for her was converging into one.
He had to let her know, so he did.
"I love you," he said, when she looked his way.
She smiled. "I love you, too." Then, she went back to watching the sun set on the horizon.
She was so beautiful, and she was within arm's reach. Easily, he took her upper arm to get her attention.
When her eyes met his, he paused briefly but said, "I love you, CJ."
Her eyes widened slightly, and he could tell that she didn't know how to respond. He supposed that she wouldn't after all of this time and their roles slightly reversed. Silently, he prayed that she handled it better than he had.
To help, he elaborated.
"I didn't know how stubborn I was but eventually realized that I handled things badly, and I'm all the sorrier for it because we've missed out on some things together, but I want to be with you, CJ. You're my One."
The relief he felt by telling her - along with the fact that she wasn't running away - brought a twinkle to his eye.
He asked, "What are you thinking?" and despite the respectable amount of confidence he felt, he nervously waited for her reply.
"I..." She looked confused and stuttered a bit more. "Houston...I don't know..." She took a breath to regroup and asked, "Houston, I know what you said, but-"
He cut her off by grabbing her at the waist and pulling her into him. Once settled, he kept his arms wrapped around her and said, "I am in love with you. I've admitted it to myself for awhile, but I couldn't keep it from you anymore. It seems pretty silly, when there's a chance that you could feel the same. I pretty sure that you used to..." This last part was said quietly because he knew that it could bring up past hurts.
He wasn't wrong. She didn't seem able to speak.
He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I'm sorry, CJ. I didn't mean to hurt you, but I didn't realize what you were telling me. I thought that maybe you were reassuring yourself of our friendship in those hard times. I'm late to the table, but I'm here." He looked her in the eyes, "I hope you still feel the same, but even if you don't, I'm not giving up. I promise that I'm worth the risk."
Her eyes became glossy, and a tear nearly escaped. She cupped her hand on his cheek.
"I haven't stopped loving you, Houston. But, because of that, I didn't want a front row seat to your other relationships. I needed to move on, in order for me to be happy."
"And, have you? Moved on?" he asked seriously. They both knew that he was asking about another man.
"Yes, I moved on," but at the thinly veiled hurt in his eyes, she continued, "but on my own."
She took a breath, then admitted, "I moved forward, but I know where my heart still belongs."
His smile was so big, he could have lit up the night sky. "Then, I don't suppose you would mind me doing this..." He leaned down to capture her mouth with his own.
When they came up for air, she said, "No, I don't mind," and they both grinned at one another.
After a few moments and with a glint in his eyes, he asked, "How would you like a candle-lit dinner back at the house?"
"Depends. Are they real candles or battery-operated?" she teased.
"Nothing but the best for you. Battery-operated, of course," he smirked.
She laughed out loud. "I see how I rate," she bantered.
This made him respond earnestly. "No, you don't - not yet - but you will in short order. I promise."
She smiled brightly. "I believe you, Houston."
Then, out of the blue, he scooped her over his shoulder and strode towards the house.
"Let's go make us some grub!" he enthusiastically said.
"Houston!" she laughed, "What the-? Put me down!"
"Nope. Not till we're in the kitchen, where you can cook us up something delicious."
"Hey! I thought you were the one doing the candle-lit dinner for us."
"I asked if you'd like a candle-lit dinner, but I never said I was preparing one."
She laughed out loud, again, and it was music to his ears. He loved their brand of fun.
"Well, I never!" she said, feigning indignation. She swatted his backside for good measure.
This caused a hitch in his otherwise fluid steps, but he said, "Better watch it, Ms. Parsons, or I'm liable to think you're flirting with me."
"Is that so? Only flirting? Touching your tush doesn't automatically equal a pass?" she teased.
He stopped, then, and slowly slid her body down to stand in front of him. Delicious friction radiated all the way down. "Was that a pass, CJ?"
She leaned even closer, head tilted to receive another burning kiss. But, when his mouth started to brush hers, she said, "Nope!" and high-tailed it to the house.
He followed closely but let her reach their destination first. She knew it and turned to him at the back door, instead of going inside. He was smiling at her, and she wrapped her arms around his neck before kissing him thoroughly.
"That was a pass," she said, cheekily, when they pulled apart. Then, she grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him inside.