"Are you sure you don't want me to come?" Joe asks Barry for what seems like the hundredth time.
Barry bites down his exasperation though to grit his teeth and nod pleasantly: "Yes, Joe, I'm sure."
He knows Joe only means well, but he also knows he wants to be the sole instigator behind Iris's fifteenth birthday surprise.
Every year on their respective birthdays, Joe always treated them to dinner out, complete with a celebration with candles and cake back at home, and as much as Barry wants to continue this family tradition, he feels this is the year to take matters into his own hands and do something unique for Iris himself.
He had been saving up from his very first job as an assistant at the school library for this after all, this being two tickets on an evening ferry across the river to watch the fireworks display the city put on in the summer, commencing during the last weeks of June and lasting up until even after the Fourth of July. Then they'd take the Red Line to Petersburg to grab dinner and visit a new bakery that specialized exclusively in gourmet brownies, where Iris could pick from the biggest and best selection in town, double fudge, cream cheese, caramel, and everything in between, returning back home just in time before curfew to have cake with Joe.
"We're celebrating with you after," Barry affirms.
"You get a driver's permit and a part-time job and think you're too grown for me, huh?" Joe teases. "Should I point out that you've still never driven on a highway and seemed terrified at the prospect when I suggested we practice last week?"
"How do you switch lanes going that fast?!" Barry exclaims, shuddering at the potential disastrous outcomes his mind conjures.
"Ugh, I can't wait to finally get my permit and go anywhere I want to!"
Iris hops down the stairs into the living room. Barry immediately sends a stern look Joe's way signaling to drop all conversation regarding her birthday.
"Two more days till you can get that permit, Baby," Joe reminds her. "Then two more years before you can go anywhere you want to."
"One more year, Dad," Iris corrects. "I'm getting my license when I turn sixteen."
"A license doesn't let you do anything. I do," Joe humors her.
"Very funny," Iris retorts. "Anyway, why does Barry think he's grown?"
Barry senses his cheeks heat until Joe saves him with a quick cover: "Because he wants to make your cake this year and take it off my hands."
Iris's face falls slightly, but she hides it with a grin.
"That sounds great," she manages before turning away.
Barry's aware of the reason she faltered. She had been looking forward to her birthday after a rough start to June due to a rejection from an acclaimed writing intensive for high school students at the local university. The instructor encouraged her to reapply next year after her writing developed a greater sophistication, as she was one of the younger applicants. Barry tried to convince Iris that this didn't indicate that anything was wrong with her, only that she needed more time to improve her skills, but this had done little to assuage Iris. It didn't help that any summer jobs she was interested in required her to be older.
Unfortunately her anticipation for an exceptional fifteenth birthday was hampered after learning most of her close friends were going to be out-of-town on vacation with their families this month, and while Barry recognizes that Iris would still enjoy commemorating her birthday with him and Joe like always, he also understands why she wants to do something special and different. He had a feeling she wanted a birthday celebration out with friends this year especially.
Which was why he planned to surprise her in two days, and why she had to be kept under the impression that they were just going to meet up to have dinner with Joe downtown as usual.
"It'll be delicious, Iris," Barry insists, maintaining the facade, even though Joe was absolutely still going to bake her birthday cake.
"I know, I know," Iris nods along, though she watches her dad climb the stairs, seemingly waiting until he's out of sight to lean closer to Barry and whisper, "Do you think Andrew will wish me a happy birthday?"
Ah, Andrew, the one person Barry would rather actually have been out-of-town…
Andrew of course was Andrew Rossi, a prospective sophomore just like them that Iris met in her Algebra class last semester and formed a sudden crush on over the course of the last few weeks of school. At least, it seemed sudden to Barry. All he knew was that one moment Iris was telling him about the nice kid who sat next to her in math and the next she was blurting out that she liked him over solving quadratic equations during a late night finals cramming session at the dining table.
Barry clears his throat, determined to quell Iris's worries, despite wishing desperately that she didn't have feelings for someone else.
"I don't see why he wouldn't," he reckons.
"That is, if he even remembers my birthday," Iris frets. "For once, I wish I wasn't born in the summer."
"He'll see it on Facebook," Barry assures her.
"That's true…" Iris allows, then perks up. "Speaking of Facebook, he Poked me the other day," she giggles.
Barry forces a smile. "Did you Poke him back?"
"No!" Iris exclaims, before hesitating: "Should I? I wanted to play it cool, you know…ugh I should have Poked him back, right? What if he thinks I don't like him-"
"Iris, relax," Barry coaxes gently. "He's not going to think you don't like him. How could anyone think that? You're the sweetest person in our grade. Anyone who knows you would agree."
"You're the sweetest person in our grade," Iris praises. "Not even, in the whole school."
Barry hopes his face hasn't gone red, but if it has, Iris doesn't seem to take heed, still fixated on Andrew.
"I'm sorry I always talk about him," she sighs. "I'm sure it's annoying."
Barry shakes his head. "Don't be. You're my best friend, Iris. You'll never annoy me."
Iris grins slyly: "I'll remember that when the dishes need to be washed after dinner tonight."
Barry smirks back: "Just as long as you sweep the floor in exchange."
She laughs and Barry's heart soars until she deflates once more.
"I just hope I can enjoy my birthday," Iris admits. "I need something to cheer me up."
Barry gulps, but feels more pleased at his surprise plan and more excited than ever for its execution.
"You will," he promises, squeezing her shoulder affectionately and eliciting a wry smile from her. "I'll make sure of it."
"Here comes the Birthday Girl," Joe gushes as Iris enters the kitchen sporting a spectacular bedhead and an oversized T-shirt so large it swallows her shorts and lends her the appearance of wearing none. Barry's heart speeds up exponentially. He attempts to persuade himself it's because he's nervous about his plan for the evening.
"Who'll always be my Baby Girl, no matter how old she gets," Joe continues, oblivious to Barry's internal turmoil.
Iris rolls her eyes, but still looks amused, standing on tiptoe to kiss her father's cheek while he flips pancakes at the stove. Barry tries not to be too transfixed by the smooth skin of her legs.
"Good morning, Daddy," she greets before turning to Barry working alongside Joe. "Bear, you're going to burn the bacon!"
Barry snaps out of the daze he often slipped into when he was busy staring at Iris to realize that indeed, the bacon strips were on the verge of excessive crisping. He hurriedly switches the heat off under his skillet and straightens up, rubbing his palms against the seat of his pajama pants awkwardly.
"Happy birthday, Iris," he smiles shyly. She beams back, and Barry feels a warmth that he desperately attributes to the hot kitchen.
"We're finally the same age again," Iris jests. "I hate when you're older than me."
"I'm still older," Barry teases. "I'll always have those three months on you."
Iris brings her hands to his sides to tickle him, a move she always resorted to whenever he was right and she didn't want to admit it.
"Settle down so we can eat," Joe chuckles when their tickling battle escalates. "Are you two fifteen or five?"
The three of them seat themselves to enjoy breakfast together. Iris smirks across the table at Barry, never breaking eye contact even as she sips her orange juice, wiggling her brows at him over her glass. He sticks his tongue out in response, more pleased than he ought to be at her attention. He can't suppress a smile as he helps himself to pancakes, anticipating that it was going to be a good day.
"So," Joe starts from his place at the head of the table, meeting Barry's gaze knowingly. "I have to make some rounds and then head to the precinct later. But I'll be able to meet you guys downtown at six."
"Sounds good," Barry mumbles with a mouth full of food, feigning casualty. "We'll catch the 5:20 train. Right, Iris?"
He glances over at her though to notice that she's preoccupied with her cell phone ringing.
When she flips it open promptly, Barry's heart sinks. There was only one person Iris would interrupt breakfast with him and Joe to tend to…
"Hello?" Iris inquires, her eyes wide, her posture stiff. Barry can feel the nervous energy surrounding her.
"Hi Andrew!" She pauses, listening to him speak on the other end of the line. "No, it's not too early, don't worry," she giggles, then visibly brightens in a way that lets Barry know she got what she had hoped for.
"Thank you, you're so sweet!" she enthuses. Barry stabs his fork into his pancakes bitterly, trying to remind himself that at least she had told him that he was the sweetest person in the school…
Iris pushes her chair back and stands, pressing the phone closer to her ear, leaving the kitchen.
"Today?" Barry hears her echo from the hallway, dread creeping over him.
"Didn't I tell you kids no cell phones at the table?" Joe mutters to Barry disapprovingly as he pours himself a cup of coffee. "She's lucky it's her birthday…"
Barry ignores Joe, straining to eavesdrop on Iris's conversation.
"I'd love to!" he discerns from her in a tone too eager for his liking. "Let me just ask my dad, okay? I'll call you back."
Iris emerges a minute later, looking happier than Barry had seen her all summer.
"Andrew and his family are driving up to the state park for the day and he asked if I want to come with them," she announces. "Can I go?"
While Barry's mouth goes dry, Joe tenses, and Barry can practically see the wheels turning in his head.
"On your birthday, Baby?" Joe attempts nonchalantly.
The inquiry seems to frustrate Iris however, and she huffs exasperatedly.
"Yes, on my birthday," she retorts. "The whole reason he's asking me to come is because it's my birthday." She shakes her head as though this should be obvious.
"I'm just saying, didn't he figure you'd already have plans?" Joe asks, continuing to persist for what Barry recognizes is his sake.
"That's why he called and asked me if I was free," Iris hisses. "Seriously, Dad, why are you being so weird? It's not like we're doing anything besides dinner-"
Barry's pulse quakes so frantically that he wonders if they can somehow perceive it.
Joe tries again: "It's a three-hour drive, Iris. You really want to spend your birthday on the road?"
"Obviously I do or else I wouldn't be asking," Iris quips, her anger rising now.
"You should go!" Barry blurts, no longer able to stand it. Somehow Joe knowing about his surprise for Iris and trying to cape for him made him feel worse.
Joe surveys him carefully before facing Iris again.
"When are you leaving?" he questions calmly, and Barry accepts his defeat.
"They'll come by to pick me up in an hour and we'll be back at around eleven," Iris replies, bouncing on her heels in anticipation. "I'll wear my seatbelt," she adds lightheartedly, as if this will convince him to agree to the idea more readily.
Joe exhales pointedly. "Alright," he concedes. "Whatever you want."
"Thank you, Daddy!" Iris squeals excitedly, throwing herself atop him to hug him.
Joe squeezes her back. "You're missing out on that red velvet cake you wanted," he jokes.
Iris waves a careless hand and scoffs.
"This is gonna be the best birthday ever!" she bubbles, heading up the stairs to get ready. She's three steps in when she pauses, turns around to Barry and mouths, "Thank you", flashing him a smile before disappearing.
The ensuing silence that bathes him and Joe is too much for Barry to handle. He stands abruptly, moving to clear the table, needing to occupy himself else he might tear up.
Joe disrupts the awkward tension after a few minutes.
"Bear, are the tickets exchangeable?" he poses.
"I don't know," Barry lies, knowing full well that all tickets sales were final, not wanting Joe to pity him more.
"I'll refund you, Son," Joe reassures him, as if that was what Barry was upset about.
"It's okay, Joe," Barry insists, hoping his voice sounds steadier than he feels. "We can go another time."
He's glad his back is to him as he rinses the syrup and grease off each dish, even though he knows he's watching him. Sure enough, he perceives Joe approaching moments later to simply clap him on the shoulder before exiting the kitchen to prepare for his day himself.
While Barry arranges the dirty plates onto the dishwasher rack, he tries to find solace in Iris's delight. Ultimately, his goal was for her to enjoy her birthday doing something special and different, and it seemed like she was going to. In a way, she got what she wanted and so did he.
Except he wants to be the reason she enjoyed herself. He wants to be the source behind her best birthday ever. And he hates admitting it, but he wants her to want him the way she wants Andrew Rossi.
Barry loads the dishwasher with soap before adjusting the settings and starting it. He braces himself against the sink and sighs deeply, deciding to make his way upstairs as well to help Iris pack for her day trip.
There's always next year, he reminds himself, and just that thought alone fills him with enough hope to cling to.