Tiny Terrors
Our story begins at Cross Refuge Cave where two daring pirates barely made their escape from the clutches of the Freyian knight's guard with their prisoner in tow. Bones the captain of this two man crew, was a small fully energized child-like creature. With her right hand always near her saber and her thirst continually unquenchable for blood. The odd group harbored their ship into a cave hidden under tin vines. Anyone could easily miss, anyone other than the infamous Captain Bones (given Bones' story on finding this odd cavern is not one she likes share). With a toothy grin the small woman-child gave her prisoner a good pat on the head and laughed with hardy HAHAHA at his irritated mug.
"What's the matter mate? Me cave not pristine enough for your princely-ness?" She ordered for her first mate, Victor, to tie there prisoner good and make sure he didn't get himself into trouble. Victor, the always loyal partner, tied their royal prisoner to the deteriorating and un-kept dock pole. It was sturdy enough to hold their prisoner tight; but one more run in with Bones' ship, The Silent Fear, and that would be the end for the dock's eight year run.
Bones sauntered up to her prisoner with her hands on her hips and a proud smile plastered upon her face. "Welcome!" she bellowed, "to Cross Refuge Cave! Why is it called this? I have no clue me and me mate 'ere just put together some words that sounded cool. Me name's Bones and that there's me loyal companion Victor," at his name the bald headed man named Victor gave a malicious grin to the terrified prince. "We'll be your humble captors for the time being, so please do get comfortable your hiney-ness," with their introductions over Bones and her mighty cohort gave the prince an exaggerated bow. "Now good-lookin' what's ye name?"
"You know I'm a prince but have no clue as to what my name is?" The prince asked exasperated.
"Give us a break mate, we ain't from these waters. Just passi'n through and happened to stumble upon this pretty kingdom ye got 'ere. Figured such a lovely domain, ought to be filthy rich," lofty first mate retorted.
The prince shifted his weight around trying to find himself a weak point in his bindings. "Well Madam and good sir-"
"Don't call me, madam kid," Bone's chortled, "name's either Captain or Captain Bones."
"Alright Miss Captain Bones," she let his remark slide, "my name is Prince Edward Nygma of the great realm of Frey."
"Well Prince Ed, for the time being you are our prisoner. And to get ourselves situated Rule #1, no escape antics. I'll cut your bloody leg off." Bones lowered her gaze and replaced it with ill-tempered one when explain that last part. Edward was beginning to feel his skin crawl at this young woman's manner. "Rule #2 call me Captain, it ain't hard. Rule #3 I don't know yet I'll get back to ye on that one. Rule #4 I get me way with my 5,000 gold pieces and ye walk free. 'owever! I don't get me money," her stare became blood curdling once more, "you don't get to walk. Am I understood?" Her cheery smile returned, and Edward gave her a slow and careful nod. "Good mate, hope ye find yourself comfortable."
Victor stationed himself out by the mouth of the cave on lookout duty while Bones stationed herself next to Edward on good looking prince duty. Hours past and the full moon surfaced over the great glistening sea. Bones found herself bored and in need of entertainment.
"Oi, Victor! Why don't ye ride on over to a port and grab me 'ome ale!?"
Victor glanced over to his captain and gave her an irritated look. "Because we're wanted men Captain, hold tight for the moment with the wine we got from that one fat earl's basement? You didn't finish it all did you Captain?"
Bones looked glumly and replied, "Aye mate, I did. Oh how I never tasted wine so sweet and decadent in me twenty years o've me life."
"I know how to pass the time." Prince Edward chimed in.
"Oh yeah, 'ow" Bones asked honestly curious.
"Glittering points that downward thrust, sparkling spears that never rust. What are they?" Edward smiled at the end.
Victor was silent, and after looking over to see if her mate was going to respond Bones gave her jolly response: "icicles. Oh, 'owe I miss me mother land. Icicles pierced unwary men every way ye looked. And ohhhhh! Them wintery cold nights that gave you the chills of death! Oh me home sweet abode!" She looked over at the young man's bewildered expression to her answer. "What's the matter mate? Just because I'm a pirate and grew upon the sweet caress of her sea, does'nt mean I ain't got a home land, or home land in me case."
"I always thought corsairs homes were the ocean itself." Edward truthfully interested in this pirate's personal business.
Bones gave the young lad one of her famous snickers, "Aye mate if ye want to think of it in such a romantic manner than aye go ahead and think of it as such. But me pirate life began on icy waters of which I will not give more details into. These tropical waters ye got here aren't too bad, but I can sure without this here heat. Makes me feel faint it does."
"Oi Captain, dim your latern. They're circling near."
"Aye, Victor. If they get any closer to the cave we'll hide in our positions got it?"
"Aye, aye captain."
Edward gave a light hearted laugh at the pirate lingo they used and gave the crew another riddle, "I will bring you down but will never bring you up. What am I?"
"Well that is an easier one lad, it's gravity!" Bones replied.
"Exactly," Ed revealed he had broken their bonds and knocked the Captain down.
"Son of a bitch!" Bones moaned as she rubbed her head and realized her saber was pushed against her throat. "Oi mate you wanna give my sword back?" Victor had swiftly moved from his lookout point to his captain's side but was stopped from moving anymore by pushing a little more on Bone's throat.
"Throw your weapons in my direction and do not make any other move." Edward demanded.
"Bloke I suggest you rethink your words." Bones warned motioning for his attention to turn to her hand which held her pistol. "I can assure you I'm a good shot and can have you on your back dead before you even make a nick at me." Her voice was slow and dripped with a chilling threat.
Edward lowered the sword and backed away from the woman. Bones slowly raised herself to her feet with her eyes fixed on the young man's. A smile no longer graced her face, instead her face was cold and her mouth never gave a twitch to contradict this demeanor. Just as her eyes were fixed, so was her gun. Edward kept taking a step back for each she took forward till there his foot was on the edge of the board walk. "Go ahead and jump in doll, I can't assure you if you'll hit them pointy rocks or not. Now I'll be having my sword back now, if you please."
Victor walked up to the prince and held a rapier to his chest in one hand and an open palm in the other. Edward gave the man the sword hilt first and brought his arms to his side. "I don't suppose you'll let me keep my legs now will you" he asked sarcastically.
The captain was silent and never moved a muscle for the good minute after. "For amusing me this long, which not many before you have, I will grant you mercy." Suddenly she rushed to Victor side grabbing her saber, "but here me now boy, displease me again, and it will be more than your legs you'll lose." She ran the sword under his chin from ear to ear. "Victor I want his highness to be-"
The rest of her sentence was interrupted by a loud crack in the air. Her first mate was thrown over the side of the dock by whatever force made its way to him.
"VICTOR!" Bones cried out looking behind her to find that the Freyian cavalry discovered their way into her hide away. Her attention went back to the prince whom found himself around the Captain in her moment of distraction and wound back into the safety his country's guard.
"Captain Bones of the Silent Fright, you are hereby under arrest by the order of the king. Your convictions are listed from kidnapping the royal prince of Frey, Murder of a Freyian guard, and piracy. May god have mercy on your soul." The captain of the guard announced.
"My god, could you have said any stiffer?" Bones complained.
"Your partner has been shot and killed, you're are being charged of many assaults, there is no hope of you escaping, and yet you stand there and jest woman!?" The captain called out.
Bones let out dry laugh, "oh trust me I will have my vengeance for Victor but I would like to contradict your statements by asking you to turn towards my ship sir." The whole guard and the prince turned their attention to the Silent Fright and gasped in horror. All the cannons were out and pointed towards the army.
"But I thought you only had one crew member!" Edward stated puzzled.
"Oh I do dear, Victor darling! Wave your hand for us!" Victor poked his head out of the port whole and waved his good arm that didn't not have a bullet hole in it. "Now if you don't mind I'll take me 5,000 gold pieces now or I'll be having your prince."
"You did bring the ransom didn't you captain?" Edward asked the captain politely.
"Listen hear you," the captain grabbed ahold of the prince's garb, "your father demanded we not spend a copper scrap on you."
"Well the Captain is not asking for a copper scrap, she's asking for gold." The prince laughed. The captain shoved the young man to the floor and ordered his men to get him out of his sight. "Spoiled brat," the captain groaned, "now back to you."
"Don't you think you'll be punished when he runs to daddy and tells him of how you harmed his son, Captain?" Bones asked amusement not found and inch on her face.
The Captain laughed condescendingly, "The king deals that smart ass more blows than our knights deal our trainees."
"Well that shows why your guard is so ill disciplined." Bones patronized.
"Listen you-" the Captain let out a sigh then smiled, "the only way you get out of this alive is in shackles. Young Lady, we have a whole fleet out there waiting to shred you boat and send it Davey Jone's Locker. Now step away from your weapons and maybe I'll put in a good word for you." He gave her a lecherous grin.
"That's a lie Captain! I had enough time to check our surroundings. There is only one ship out there." Victor called out from the ship.
"Prince Edward I don't know what you did to piss off your father that he sends only one ship and his worse fleet of guards but I do feel pity for you. Victor! On my count fire, understood?"
"Aye Captain!" Victor shouted back.
"5!"
"Lieutenant!" The captain called out. The lieutenant brought out the prince once more.
"4!"
"Lieutenant shoot the crowned prince on my command. Ready!"
"Wait you can't do that!" Ed yelled!
"AIM!"
"1!" Bones cried out running towards the prince. The cannons were set off one after the other. The Lieutenant was to dazed by the explosion that enveloped the area around him. Miraculously Bones found her way around this ongoing fire and pulled the prince through. "YOUR COUNTRY IS FUCKING CRAZY! WHAT DID YOU DO!" She yelled back at the prince.
Unfortunately Edward was cut off by gunfire shot in their direction as they climbed up onto their ship. Another fire from the cannon and the shooter was no longer a problem. "My country!? What about this onslaught of cannon fire! Isn't worried about hitting you!?" They reached the top of the ship and pulled themselves inside the ship where they grabbed a firearm and fired upon the knights.
"I follow Captain's ordered no matter what is in the way!" Victor called back. The gunfire was ongoing for about another five minutes or so till one side fired no more. After the smoke had lifted all that was left was shreds of this soldier here and captain there.
"Victor raise the anchor! Edward I hope you know how to set a sail!" Bones called from the wheel.
Ed tried his hardest but to no avail, Victor had finished pulling in the anchor in record time and pushed Edward aside. "Come on kid, either take hold or sit in the corner!"
"We're pulling out! Victor get the plank!" Bones called.
A shiver shot up Edward's spine. They weren't going to make him walk the plank were they? Sure he proved to be a problem for them but they weren't going to make him walk! "Excuse me Captain?" Edward called up the Bones.
"Yes Prince Edward?" Bones called back.
"Am I walking the plank?" Edward asked, barely got the question out. The two pirates let a loud howl of laughter.
"Yes you are dear, yes you are!" Bone's voice boomed through Edward's ears. It broke every cell in his being and reached on to the end of his time. All he could do was gulp and stare down the captain. "Here's our stop puppet." The Prince turned his attention to the side of the ship and let out a groan at his idiocy.
A larger than life maroon ship drifted around while its anchor held it in place. Edward even felt another wave exasperation to find that the Guard Captain had left the ship unguarded. With not even a steward to watch it. Edward felt a large hand land on his shoulder, a weight that made him feel like he could break through the floor at any second. "Well boy, it's time to walk the plank." Victor chortled.
"Little fact about me and Victor, Prince, we don't like snuffing out our prisoners with such a simple plank trick. No we make them suffer the most heinous torture your tiny brain can imagine before we let them go. We won't even let our prisoners die until I give them permission to do so. Now shall we boys? My little terror here is getting to small for me. Plus she's on her last legs, so many leaks still need to be patched." Bones gave a small sniff and walked the plank to her new vessel. "I think I'll name her tiny terror in fact." She held hands behind her back, shoulders back, and head held high as she inspected her new prize.
Edward was having a harder time walking the plank as the rumbling ocean beneath the two ships churned and slammed against the sides. "You're either aboard or dead Mr. Nygma your choice." Victor called to the prince who still had trouble to put a foot on the wood. "Look kid, you not over hear before Captain gives the command to blow this ship to smithereens, I will not hesitate to end your life." At this Edward closed his eyes and ran across the board and slammed into the chest of Victor. "Well you got balls for doing it blindly, I'll give you that. But that was still incredibly stupid."
"Give him a break Victor, Lads had a tough day. Ain't that right boy! Now come here by me side." Victor walked below deck to load the cannons and Edward did he was told. The prince and the captained stood side by side facing the old rickety ship once known as the Silent Fright. "Me dad gave me that ship, he did. Stole it from some travell'in merchs. It was me sixteenth birthday present, oh you should 'ave seen her back in the day. She wasn't as run down as she is now, no she was a looker." Ed heard a small sniff from the Captain but when he looked over no sign of remorse could be found. "If you don't want to talk about the affair of ye father I won't pry, and if you so choose I can find you a job aboard me ship. But if you ever want to talk... Victorisagoodlistenertrytalkingtohim." Bones said quickly.
"Thank you, Captain. I would very much like that. Besides the life of a prince is getting to dull if you ask me. I hate dull." Edward stated sounding very irritated over the very idea of dullness.
"Well then, the pirate's life is for you. Not a single moment of dullness. Now as for your position on my ship… we do need a cabin boy." She laughed maniacally.
"Wait what? NO!"
"Fire!" Bones ordered. The Silent Fright was blown out of existence and with it, any horrible memories that haunted it. "Wait! Blast it all to hell! Victor stop! I left me wallet on board along with me collection of swords and guns! Victor stoooop!"
Chapter 1 Edward *end*