p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;""He liked you a lot." Jimmy chuckled, giving me an all-knowing smile/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;""I really liked him, too." I assured, gazing off momentarily, remembering, "I think we should go all go our span id="a916569_8" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"separate ways/span for a bit. We've all got things to do before we leave for the show tonight." I concluded. Within moments both Julia and Jimmy were out the door, leaving me completely and entirely alone./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;"For the first time in a long time I didn't want to be at the piano. It reminded me of him, and that was something that couldn't happen the day before the TONY's, the only night of the year when I had to smile and wave and pretend that everything was going to be okay. Moving to the couch, I pulled out my phone and started flipping through my pictures. I'd never realized how many I'd taken until then. emA span id="a916569_6" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"video/span. /emI guffawed as it came across the screen. I stared down, confused./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;"Pictures had been one thing – a reminder of the memories that we'd made – but a video – that was different. This was live-action footage of Kyle, bubbly and smiling, marked only days before he'd died. emDo I really want to watch this? /emI asked myself. I couldn't even remembered what it was we'd been recording. Maybe I'd blocked it out for a reason./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" Finding whatever courage I could, I turned the volume up and pressed play, bracing myself for the imminent burst of emotions that would follow./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Hello, world." My ridiculously drunken self shouted into to the speaker, "Do you want to say anything to the world?" I asked, turning the camera in his direction, "This is Kyle before he wins the giant award"/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Tom, turn the damn camera off." Kyle cackled, swatting at the phone, "I haven't even been nominated yet."/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "You will be." I shouted, "Because you've got skills and the people like you and you're not a crusty span id="a916569_7" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"old guy/span like me–"/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "You're not a crusty old guy." He rolled his eyes. Either he had been able to hold his liquor incredibly well or he hadn't been drinking nearly as much as I had, "Please put the camera down."/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Why? This is fun!" I bellowed. emSeriously. Why don't I remember this?/em/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" Tears welled up in my eyes as I rubbed the heat from my skin. My lips met his and I finally started to remember. That was one of the last time we were together before the accident. In the video, he was so happy, so awkward, so emhim/em. And now, all he is is a hole in the ground with a stone and a couple of flowers, and the generic emGone but Never Forgotten/em, that didn't do him nearly the justice he deserved./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" Yes, all I had was a video of a drunken me and a totally embarrassed Kyle. When I looked back down at the video, I grinning ear to ear in my drunken stupor, "Say goodbye to the people." I commanded, giving a half-assed wave, leaning my head against his shoulder./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Goodbye." He murmured, his own earnest smile spreading across his lips as the video came to a close. It was then that I decided emthat /emwas how I had to remember him – the handsomely-awkward-semi-teen-starving-artist who gave me happiness, even if it was only for a while. With that thought in mind, I took a snapshot of the smiling Kyle, my head on his shoulder, and set it as my span id="a916569_4" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"home/span screen. Yes, this was how I was going to remember Kyle. Others would come and go and he sting of his death would fade with time, but this was going to remain – just like this – forever./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;""I really liked him, too." I assured, gazing off momentarily, remembering, "I think we should go all go our span id="a916569_8" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"separate ways/span for a bit. We've all got things to do before we leave for the show tonight." I concluded. Within moments both Julia and Jimmy were out the door, leaving me completely and entirely alone./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;"For the first time in a long time I didn't want to be at the piano. It reminded me of him, and that was something that couldn't happen the day before the TONY's, the only night of the year when I had to smile and wave and pretend that everything was going to be okay. Moving to the couch, I pulled out my phone and started flipping through my pictures. I'd never realized how many I'd taken until then. emA span id="a916569_6" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"video/span. /emI guffawed as it came across the screen. I stared down, confused./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;"Pictures had been one thing – a reminder of the memories that we'd made – but a video – that was different. This was live-action footage of Kyle, bubbly and smiling, marked only days before he'd died. emDo I really want to watch this? /emI asked myself. I couldn't even remembered what it was we'd been recording. Maybe I'd blocked it out for a reason./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" Finding whatever courage I could, I turned the volume up and pressed play, bracing myself for the imminent burst of emotions that would follow./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Hello, world." My ridiculously drunken self shouted into to the speaker, "Do you want to say anything to the world?" I asked, turning the camera in his direction, "This is Kyle before he wins the giant award"/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Tom, turn the damn camera off." Kyle cackled, swatting at the phone, "I haven't even been nominated yet."/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "You will be." I shouted, "Because you've got skills and the people like you and you're not a crusty span id="a916569_7" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"old guy/span like me–"/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "You're not a crusty old guy." He rolled his eyes. Either he had been able to hold his liquor incredibly well or he hadn't been drinking nearly as much as I had, "Please put the camera down."/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Why? This is fun!" I bellowed. emSeriously. Why don't I remember this?/em/p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" Tears welled up in my eyes as I rubbed the heat from my skin. My lips met his and I finally started to remember. That was one of the last time we were together before the accident. In the video, he was so happy, so awkward, so emhim/em. And now, all he is is a hole in the ground with a stone and a couple of flowers, and the generic emGone but Never Forgotten/em, that didn't do him nearly the justice he deserved./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" Yes, all I had was a video of a drunken me and a totally embarrassed Kyle. When I looked back down at the video, I grinning ear to ear in my drunken stupor, "Say goodbye to the people." I commanded, giving a half-assed wave, leaning my head against his shoulder./p
p style="margin: 1em 0px 0px; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 25.600000381469727px;" "Goodbye." He murmured, his own earnest smile spreading across his lips as the video came to a close. It was then that I decided emthat /emwas how I had to remember him – the handsomely-awkward-semi-teen-starving-artist who gave me happiness, even if it was only for a while. With that thought in mind, I took a snapshot of the smiling Kyle, my head on his shoulder, and set it as my span id="a916569_4" class="a916569" style="list-style: none; float: none; font-weight: bold; cursor: pointer; height: 16px; display: inline !important; padding: 0px !important; margin: 0px !important; border-style: none none solid !important; border-bottom-width: 1px !important; text-decoration: underline !important; color: #0000ff !important;"home/span screen. Yes, this was how I was going to remember Kyle. Others would come and go and he sting of his death would fade with time, but this was going to remain – just like this – forever./p