Blue Immortal
by the Legendary Armor
Terror.
It was there, and always on his mind. It had gone from a simple fear to something else entirely, something much more horrifying and complex, something that haunted his every waking moment. He could think of almost nothing else, and the anxiety, the obsession, grew more severe with each passing moment.
...all those cold, lifeless bodies, smothering him, their clammy, cool skin slimy with sweat... his skin slick with their blood, their heavy limbs so suffocating, so heavy...
Death... eternal sleep. It was even more possible now than it had been back then, on this ridiculous, damnable journey... There was no way he was strong enough to protect them all, to cover all their weak points. What if something went wrong? They were all vulnerable, they could all die...
Even the strongest of them all.
He couldn't bear the thought of any of them dying, of course, but the Colonel... He could die, too... Though he seemed a god, he was human like the rest of them. He bled as they bled... more than once, Guy had been startled by the sight of the older man's blood.
...and if Jade could die... the rest of them certainly could. We could be slaughtered at any moment...
This quiet stay in Keterburg's hotel wasn't making it any easier on his nerves. This room, where he was alone, without the others to distract him from this illness, from this fever of the mind... it caused his waking nightmares to plague him even more terribly. Here, even the shadows seemed deadly... all he could trust was himself and the other five. Even nature could turn against them, and the shadows, the shadows could hide things--horrible things...
...But wait. Could he really trust himself? He recalled the curse slot... the unnatural bloodlust, the desire to murder...
Clutching at his short hair, he fell back on his bed and silently screamed.
"Where's Guy?" Luke asked, messily biting into a juicy chicken leg. "It's not like him to miss dinner."
"Perhaps he tired of the lack of manners some of us are guilty of," Jade replied, sipping at his tea with dignity. His voice and expression were cool as usual, but Luke scowled back at him, quite used to the brunette's hidden sarcasms.
"He didn't look like he was feeling well... he went back to his room," Tear quipped. "He's looked pale and sleep deprived for several days, but he always avoids me when I try to ask him about it..." She seemed bothered, but looked at Jade, as if he had an idea; which he did, of course.
"Well, since our dear Gailardia is terrified of women and Luke is busy consuming everything in sight, I suppose I'll check on him," he said, finishing his tea and standing. Tear sighed as Luke muttered annoyed curses, his mouth full of food; Natalia rolled her eyes, and Anise simply giggled. Yes, it was business as usual, Jade thought to himself.
But as he walked away towards Guy's bedroom, the thought became tinged with doubt.
His knock went unanswered.
The sound barely registered in Guy's mind, so enveloped in fear and sorrow as he was. However, Jade rapped again, sharper and more loudly; the sound echoed rudely through the dark, humid room. The swordsman's eyes grew a little less wide as he slowly sat up, tense and wondering. Unwilling to speak, struggling to pull himself together and summon up a facade, he didn't move at all.
Jade's voice pierced his very heart, though the words were casual and soft. "Guy, please open the door. It's so very lonely and chilly in this hallway, you know..."
With a strained chuckle to himself, the blond rose and shakily stumbled to the ornate door. Turning the knob, he came face-to-face with the Necromancer, who looked as healthy and handsome as usual--quite a contrast to Guy, since his skin was paler than it should be, covered in cold sweat; dark circles under his eyes enhanced the dull fatigue in the sky-blue orbs. "Jade... what is it?" He absently ran an ungloved hand through his terribly messy hair, the lights of the hallway making his tired eyes glow sadly.
"I'm here to check on you and enjoy light conversation, of course. My, that's a fashionable new hairstyle."
He tried so hard to hold the rush of anxiety back. Jade... so strong, so amazing. He couldn't... he couldn't imagine losing him. His character... Looking into Jade's profound crimson eyes, he felt himself breaking further, his spirit bent and torn from mental horror. Realizing he needed to say something, he thought for a moment, and spoke, "I... I've been doing some thinking."
"About something macabre, I presume, if thinking alone has done this to you." He motioned for the swordsman to sit on the bed; Guy complied, his usual vigor nonexistant.
"...I guess you could say that." Sharing the truth with someone, someone as iron-willed and wonderful as Jade... might ease some of that terrible fear and pain. Yet... what would Jade think of him...? He didn't want to be perceived as weak, didn't want the Colonel to think less of him. But he was falling apart...
"Oh?" Jade closed the door and sat beside the younger man, crossing his arms and legs. "Have your memories added to your fears, perhaps?"
Guy wouldn't meet his eyes; instead, he stared at the floor. "We could all die... at any moment, any one of us. Even you..." He paused. "I can't imagine anyone dying, especially you. I know it's ridiculous, I know it's something I'd have to just cope with and move on, but..." We all need each other. And you... you give me courage, you give me hope...
"Oh, dear. Why me in particular? It would make the group seem even more vulnerable? Do you truly think so highly of my abilities?"
"That, too," he replied without thinking.
Easily recognizing the nuances of that statement, Jade smirked. "You shouldn't worry about a little thing like that. I have you to protect me, as well as four other competent people; that goes for each and every one of us. Five people to watch our backs." Pausing, he added with a hint of mirth, "Besides, haven't you heard the rumors? Apparently I'm immortal. How interesting."
Turning Jade's logic over in his head, Guy remained silent. It did make sense, certainly more than his paranoid fantasies. And worrying about it won't help. Hell, it'll probably make it worse--look what it's done to me already. He held back a sigh. This isn't like me at all. He could feel the burn of anxiety ebbing... and Jade's warmth, making him comfortable, making him even more drowsy. "Thank you," he said quietly. "Forget this happened, alright? I'll hold to your words; this will never happen again."
Jade smirked. "I'll remember it, but as an admirable growing experience. Certainly I won't let the others know." He paused, then said as he stood, "I myself have never truly appreciated what it means to die. I don't plan to find out by firsthand experience, and I'll make sure you won't, either." Before he walked away, he brushed his hand against the blond's cheek and smiled.
He watched him as he departed, slightly dumbstruck as he thought about everything that had just happend. He had reached out to Jade Curtiss--and the brunette had more than accepted, he had replied with... affection? What did that touch, that expression, that closeness mean?
A small smile curved his lips as he realized not only had he begun to heal--perhaps he'd also found something he'd only dared to dream of.
(end)