Okay, okay, I know it's been done before but I wanted to try it: the Star Wars characters as the characters from the Lord of the Rings. (A/N: Let's not concern ourselves with the fact that not all of these people were alive at the same time, okay? And also, pretend that everyone speaks English...) However, I think that my cast may suprise you - some of them were deliberately chosen for the roles that would least suit them for amusement *laughs evilly*
Characters:
Bilbo ~ Anakin Solo
Frodo ~ Luke
Sam ~ Leia
Merry ~ Han
Pippin ~ Obi-Wan
Gandalf ~ Boba Fett
Gollum ~ Yoda
Tom Bombadil ~ Chewbacca
Strider/Aragorn ~ Jacen
Legolas ~ Jaina
Gimli ~ R2-D2
Boromir ~ C3PO
Elrond ~ Qui-Gon
Saruman ~ Darth Maul
Sauron ~ Darth Vader
Ringwraiths ~ Ewoks
____________________________________________________________
Just as hopelessly lost as always, Anakin wandered around what seemed like an endless maze of tunnels. Oh, how he hated tunnels. So dark, so dreary, so muddy... so tunnel-like. He cursed at the fact that his ship had chosen to crash just then, landing him in this desolate wasteland. Wading through some stagnant water, he saw something up ahead. What was it?
Suddenly, he felt a searing pain across his ankles. Whirling around, he saw a little green troll hitting him with a cane. "Come to steal my precioussss, you have! Nasty little creature, you are! You shall never get my preciousss circuit! It's mine!" *thwack* "Mine, say I! Mine, it is!" *whack* "Never let yous have it, I won't! It's mine, all mine! My preciousssss!!!" *thwack*
Standing there staring at the munchkin, the first thought that of course lept to mind was, 'What asylum did this thing escape from anyway?' But he needed a new circuit to fix his ship and get off the planet, so he decided that he'd have to get it. However he could.
And so, grabbing the circuit from the green gargoyle, Anakin dashed away.
____________________________________________________________
"And so," droned Anakin, "That is how I got the circuit from the evil slug-creature and became a hero!" Luke stared at him skeptically. "Right, Uncle Anakin. You stole a circuit from a hideous beast. Like I really believe you." Anakin shoved his sweaty, dirty hand straight into Luke's face. "You don't believe me? Look! Look at that scar! That's from where it bit me!"
Luke almost passed out from the stench. "Okay..." he muttered and ran into the 'fresher to hurl.
Suddenly, Boba Fett burst into the room, screaching in a little girl's voice, "IS IT HIDDEN? IS IT SAFE?" Luke stopped gagging and watched as the bounty hunter tore the circuit from Uncle Anakin's hands. "YOU CAN'T TOUCH IT! WE MUST DESTROY IT!" With this, he threw the circuit into the fire. "Umm. Erm. If you don't mind me asking... what the hell do you think that you're doing?!" hollered Luke. Boba Fett glared at him. "You fool! This is not just any circuit, this is the One Circuit! The Dark Side is searching for it, and it must be destroyed at all costs! For if they get it, they will have the power to build the fastest podracers in the galaxy and they will beat our poor Rebel pilots in the Annual Podracing Grand Prix, humiliating them beyond belief! For only the Dark Side has the power to use it" He paused for a moment. "Oh, and I think that it also lets them take over the universe and make all of mankind their slaves or something, but that's not really the issue right now."
Anakin shook his fist at the fire. "Burn, wicked Circuit, burn! Rebel podracers kick ass!"
_____________________________________________
Three Circuits for the Jedi under the sky,
Seven for the Wookies in their halls of stone,
Nine for Ewoks doomed to die,
One for the Sith on his shadowed throne
In the universe of Star Wars where the Death Star lies.
One Circuit to rule them all, One Circuit to find them,
One Circuit to bring them all and in the darkness bind them,
In the universe of Star Wars where the Death Star lies.
______________________________________________
Author's Notes: Like it? Next chapter contains Leia hitting Luke with gardening shears, Boba Fett in wizard robes, and other such random insanity! REVIEW!!!
Characters:
Bilbo ~ Anakin Solo
Frodo ~ Luke
Sam ~ Leia
Merry ~ Han
Pippin ~ Obi-Wan
Gandalf ~ Boba Fett
Gollum ~ Yoda
Tom Bombadil ~ Chewbacca
Strider/Aragorn ~ Jacen
Legolas ~ Jaina
Gimli ~ R2-D2
Boromir ~ C3PO
Elrond ~ Qui-Gon
Saruman ~ Darth Maul
Sauron ~ Darth Vader
Ringwraiths ~ Ewoks
____________________________________________________________
Just as hopelessly lost as always, Anakin wandered around what seemed like an endless maze of tunnels. Oh, how he hated tunnels. So dark, so dreary, so muddy... so tunnel-like. He cursed at the fact that his ship had chosen to crash just then, landing him in this desolate wasteland. Wading through some stagnant water, he saw something up ahead. What was it?
Suddenly, he felt a searing pain across his ankles. Whirling around, he saw a little green troll hitting him with a cane. "Come to steal my precioussss, you have! Nasty little creature, you are! You shall never get my preciousss circuit! It's mine!" *thwack* "Mine, say I! Mine, it is!" *whack* "Never let yous have it, I won't! It's mine, all mine! My preciousssss!!!" *thwack*
Standing there staring at the munchkin, the first thought that of course lept to mind was, 'What asylum did this thing escape from anyway?' But he needed a new circuit to fix his ship and get off the planet, so he decided that he'd have to get it. However he could.
And so, grabbing the circuit from the green gargoyle, Anakin dashed away.
____________________________________________________________
"And so," droned Anakin, "That is how I got the circuit from the evil slug-creature and became a hero!" Luke stared at him skeptically. "Right, Uncle Anakin. You stole a circuit from a hideous beast. Like I really believe you." Anakin shoved his sweaty, dirty hand straight into Luke's face. "You don't believe me? Look! Look at that scar! That's from where it bit me!"
Luke almost passed out from the stench. "Okay..." he muttered and ran into the 'fresher to hurl.
Suddenly, Boba Fett burst into the room, screaching in a little girl's voice, "IS IT HIDDEN? IS IT SAFE?" Luke stopped gagging and watched as the bounty hunter tore the circuit from Uncle Anakin's hands. "YOU CAN'T TOUCH IT! WE MUST DESTROY IT!" With this, he threw the circuit into the fire. "Umm. Erm. If you don't mind me asking... what the hell do you think that you're doing?!" hollered Luke. Boba Fett glared at him. "You fool! This is not just any circuit, this is the One Circuit! The Dark Side is searching for it, and it must be destroyed at all costs! For if they get it, they will have the power to build the fastest podracers in the galaxy and they will beat our poor Rebel pilots in the Annual Podracing Grand Prix, humiliating them beyond belief! For only the Dark Side has the power to use it" He paused for a moment. "Oh, and I think that it also lets them take over the universe and make all of mankind their slaves or something, but that's not really the issue right now."
Anakin shook his fist at the fire. "Burn, wicked Circuit, burn! Rebel podracers kick ass!"
_____________________________________________
Three Circuits for the Jedi under the sky,
Seven for the Wookies in their halls of stone,
Nine for Ewoks doomed to die,
One for the Sith on his shadowed throne
In the universe of Star Wars where the Death Star lies.
One Circuit to rule them all, One Circuit to find them,
One Circuit to bring them all and in the darkness bind them,
In the universe of Star Wars where the Death Star lies.
______________________________________________
Author's Notes: Like it? Next chapter contains Leia hitting Luke with gardening shears, Boba Fett in wizard robes, and other such random insanity! REVIEW!!!