The Blood that Bonds Us

by YourVixen

Exiled by the Cullens for drinking human blood, sends Bella on a downwards spiral sleeping her way through Volterra. After fleeing to the UK she stumbles upon a familiar vampire. Though this time something feels different. *TwiFandomNews Non-Canon Contest 2018 Entry*

AN: This is my first entry for TwiFandomNews Non-Canon contest 2018. Thank you to my awesome pre reader Mylisssa and stellar Beta Monica03. Without you ladies I wouldn't have made it this far so thank you. Thank you to everyone who read, reviewed, and voted. Though this didn't win anything I'm immensely proud of this story, as well as received some awesome feedback from the community, so thank you again.

(Originally, I did not have any plans to continue this story. After the overwhelming response I received during the contest I've decided I will do an outtake. So subscribe to my alerts and be on the lookout. )

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephanie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

BPOV

Seattle, Washington – Autumn 2017

The crimson sugar flowed effortlessly down my throat as my lips clenched around the delicate wrist of my victim. I drank in my sin with no remorse or regard for the life I was ripping away. The family I may be tearing to shambles, including my own. I was consumed by the desires I'd suppressed and the chains I finally broke free from. I felt free from all my uncertainty and self-doubt. Free from the shame of what I'd become, free from the struggle to go against my every instinct, and the true nature of a vampire. I refuse to be in a perfectly wrapped box anymore. The blood stained my lips as my victim's pulse faded. The sensory became too much as I felt Alec's tongue dip into my heat. I moaned, clutching the dark strands of his hair and pushing his face as close to my sex as possible, while I simultaneously drank in the sweet blood of our next meal. I was riding out my blood high and my orgasm when I heard my name being faintly called. I drained the rest of the redhead and dropped her to the floor with the rest of the bodies. I was riding the wave all the way to cloud nine, vibrating with the pleasure of my orgasm and the incredible high of virgin blood.

More

That was all I could think about, not batting an eyelash at the pile of bodies by the bed.

Alec rose from between my knees and looked over his shoulder. I used my legs to push myself up looking past him at his sister.

"What is it, Jane? I was kinda in the middle of something here," I said, eyeing her brother.

"You've been in the middle of said thing for almost a week now and your phone won't stop its insistent ringing. It's Ness…" she spoke flatly, walking over to the bed and passing me my phone.

It was like the haze I was consumed with dissipated and everything became clear.

My daughter

She's been trying to reach me and I've been too busy for her. The guilt came rushing back as I shoved Alec out of the way. I got out of bed stepping over the remains of our seven-course meal and reviewed all the missed calls and text on my phone.

Fuck, I can't believe I missed another week.

"Shit," I muttered aloud.

"You act as if it was your husband or something," she sighed, rolling her ruby red eyes.

"Very funny," I snorted. She knows good and well I wouldn't give a damn if it was.

"I'm here all day folks," She grinned.

"You're much better at providing pain than you are laughs. Keep that in mind," I replied.

I ignored her middle finger solute and scrolled through my phone. Pain vibrated within me. It felt so intense I thought Jane got past my shield somehow. I looked over at her and she was tapping away on her phone from the couch. Jane wasn't the one causing my pain my guilt was. My daughter was worried. I needed to get home stat. I shot her a quick text that I was on my way back.

"So where did you tell them you were going anyway?" Alec asked shifting the pile of bodies off his pants so he could grab and slide them on.

"I was just supposed to be popping to Phoenix to see my mom and come right back," I groaned.

"Bella, though I hated you at first, I've grown rather fond of you now. Just come back to Volterra with us. This is our last official trip to the states. Renesmee stopped aging at twenty-one four months ago, so our monthly trips are going to turn into yearly trips just to check in," Jane offered.

"And as much as I love your sparkle snatch, it's not enough for me to keep coming back and forth every few months. Especially when we can live in paradise in Volterra. It's all the blood and all of me you can handle," Alec winked.

His offer tugged at something deep inside of me. I wanted to go to be free of my ties to Forks, the Cullens, and my marriage once and for all, but the light shining brighter than anything was my daughter. I'd never leave her. I'd live through an eternity of hell as long as she was by my side.

"Thanks, but no thanks. Ness still needs me. But I'll make a trip to Volterra real soon, okay?" I asked, bringing Jane into a hug in which she reluctantly accepted.

"Fine," she muttered.

"Catch ya later, sparkle peen," I teased.

"Hey!" he snapped.

"You started it," I reminded him.

"And you always find a way to finish what I start. I will miss you, Bella Cullen,"

"Ugh, call me Swan."

That Night Forks Washington,

The crunchy gravel popped beneath my step as I made my way to the cottage. I slipped in my golden contacts in an effort to keep up the ruse. I realized my effort was in vain once I reached the front door. I felt it, my husband, my daughter, Jake, and six other vampires. I knew why they were here, the jig was up. I did a quick review of my options; I could either go in there, or I could take off and avoid the impending confrontation, giving it time to blow over. That's what I did with Edward's and my marital problems. This time was different though. I couldn't prolong the inevitable anymore. I needed to finally finish this. I swung the door open with full force, watching the wall plaster crack to pieces behind the force of my swing. All nine heads snapped in my direction stunned by my entrance. I strode into the cottage, taking a seat on the couch, kicking my feet up on the coffee table.

"Did everyone bring your letters? Let us get this show on the road," I clapped my hands obnoxiously.

If the goal was to make me uncomfortable, I was turning the tables on their asses. I saw Jake slip the folded piece of paper in his back pocket sheepishly.

They are so predictable. I chuckled to myself.

Carlisle was the first to gather the balls to speak, "Bella, we know you've been feeding off humans for quite some time now."

"I figured the jig was up," I said.

I popped the itchy contacts out of my eyes and tossed them to the floor.

"You know we have treaties to uphold to-"

"I don't feed here," I argued, cutting Carlisle off.

"That's not the point, Bella. This isn't how our family does things," Edward stated, finally finding his voice.

"If we're really a family, why can't we choose to accept each other for who we are and not try to change each other?" I spat.

"No one is trying to change you, Bella," Alice lied.

"Alice, you are so full of shit. You have been trying to change me since the day we met. My clothes, my hair, how I walk, how I talk, you even tried to change how I eat. That was all when I was human, and even now as a vampire, none of that has changed," I argued.

"Mom, you are one of the most important people in my life, but your feeding is causing a strain on the family. Don't let this need for human blood tear this family apart," Renesmee said softly.

I love my daughter with every fiber of my being. She's so much like me when I was a human, a little too much like me. I allowed her to be brainwashed just as I was, skewing her perception of right and wrong as mine was for so long.

"Ness, you have memories of everything you've seen, but there is still some you haven't. Our bodies crave human blood. We will always be weaker and have less control over our abilities with animal blood. When you were in my belly, you craved human blood. You loved it actually," I told her.

"She was a baby! She hasn't touched human blood or any blood since. She isn't one of you!" Jake roared. I had Jake on his back in seconds flat, my hand squeezing his throat tightly.

"Mom!" Renesmee yelled.

"Bella!" echoed from everyone else.

I let go of Jake's throat, threw him across the room, and resumed my place on the couch.

"Don't ever raise your voice to me again, Jake," I said flatly.

What did I ever see in that pussy?

I looked from him to Edward.

As a human, I clearly had a type.

Everything in me wanted to tell Renesmee about Jane's offer. I wanted so desperately to beg her to come with me, to show her the real ways of vampirism and to embrace all parts, the good, the bad, and the ugly, because it is all a part of her. I wanted to scream, blow off Forks, the Cullens, even the pack, but I could never make her choose. The decision alone would rip her to shreds. She has that big heart that I once had as a human where I loved everybody and was susceptible to the smallest influence. Though I hated that about myself now, when I look back on it, I could never hate it about my daughter. I love that she has a big heart, and I refuse to be the one to break it.

"I love you, Ness, but I won't stop feeding on humans. It's who we are. It's a part of who you are. I'm so sorry I allowed you to hate that part of yourself for so long. One day you will learn to embrace who you truly are without influence from this family or the pack. You will learn to listen to what speaks to you as I have. When you do, come find me," I told her.

Tears formed in my daughter's eyes as she gathered what I was saying.

This was goodbye.

I didn't want to leave her, the thought alone was crippling me from the inside but I had to remain strong on the outside. If she saw an ounce of doubt she would talk me out of it. I needed to do this not only for me but her. I know she loves me but she loves her father, the Cullens, and the pack. Losing them all at one time would devastate her. In my heart, I knew she would choose me it was just the bond we shared but I could never hurt her like that.

"So you're really going to choose human blood over us?" Emmett asked, hurt clear in his tone.

"I love you, Bear, but this is a choice you guys are making for me," I sighed.

"I agree with Bella, just let her be who she is. She doesn't need to go," my favorite major said.

"I won't be married to a monster. I know what feeding off humans does to your mind. It condemns your soul," Edward replied.

"Oh get over this my soul bullshit. It's a bunch of crap. I'm tired of you trying to control me, making all of my decisions. It's like you and Alice worked together to turn me into a trophy for your family," I snapped.

"Bella, you must know it's not like that," Esme sighed.

"No offense, Esme, but they are trying to turn me into you. Primped, proper, mild-mannered, and soft-spoken, a kept woman. And there's nothing wrong with being that kind of woman, as long as it's your choice, and it's not mine. That is not and will never be me," I spoke.

"So what, that's it? Is it over? You're just going to abandon our child, our marriage, and the life we built together?" Edward asked.

"I'd never abandon my child but let's be honest, she basically lives on the Rez now. She has since she became full age, and I will only be a phone call away. As for our marriage, Edward, who are we kidding? Our marriage has been dead for some time now," I announced.

Everyone tried to look away, pretending they didn't hear the comment or like they haven't noticed the difference since the day I changed. Like the scent of Alec didn't linger in the air, like they never heard the fight the first time I came home freshly fucked by another. The Cullens were world class avoiders. Any topic too uncomfortable for them, or that didn't fit in the perfect little world they constructed got swept under the rug. That's why Edward was trying to force us together knowing I've been with dozens since the day I said I do. The fact that my heart was no longer in this marriage meant nothing to him, to any of them. It's hilarious to think drinking human blood is where they decided to draw the line.

"All marriages have rough patches, Bella. We can get through this," he argued.

"I don't think we can. Human Bella might have been your mate, but the day I died, I changed. I'm not that girl anymore, and you have taken no interest in the new me."

"How can you say that? Once we are mated, we are mated for life," Edward scoffed.

"Edward, let me ask you this, if I can't stop feeding on humans, are you prepared to let me go?" I asked him.

"Of course, I can't condone that."

"My point exactly. Edward, there was a time when you wouldn't live without me. Can you honestly look me in the eyes and tell me you'd go to the Volturi now and beg for death?"

Edward hesitated. I watched the gears turn in his head as he tried to formulate the perfect answer.

"There was a time that yes would have flown out your mouth without thinking. We have changed, Edward, and it's not your fault or mine. The day I died was the day your mate died. I'm sorry, but I don't belong to you anymore," I explained.

I will always care about Edward just because of the connection we share through our daughter, but all those human feelings and memories are fuzzy and practically non-existent. I've been told as a vampire everything is heightened, all your emotions and personality traits. For me, I feel like everything that was dormant in me came to the surface. The Bella inside me I suppressed wouldn't be chained anymore. Part of me blames myself for not truly being myself with Edward from the beginning. Maybe if I had, we wouldn't have been where we are now.

"I love you, Mom," Renesmee cried, running to hug me.

"I love you too, baby girl. Take care of yourself. Come find me anytime."

"Where will you go, Bella?" Jasper asked.

"I'm sure I'll figure something out."

Volterra, Italy – Winter 2017

A lazy smile graced my lips as I climbed out of bed and grabbed the bottle of whiskey and crawled over top of Alec, straddling his waist as his hooded eyes looked into mine.

I took a swig of whiskey enjoying the warmth that spread throughout me. Whiskey, a pleasure hidden from me by the Cullens for many years. Had I known I could get trashed it would have made the first few years of my marriage way more tolerable. Instantly the urge was back, I was horny and hungry for something a little more red. I wished I could have blamed it on the alcohol like humans tend to do, but since I've been in Volterra I've been even more insatiable than before.

"Gimmie a minute. We've been going for fourteen days straight. I can barely keep up with you," He laughed, reading my mind.

"Is the sparkle peen tired?" I joked.

I reached over to the nightstand and hit the buzzer, "O Neg, QOA please" I requested,

I slipped on my silk robe and made my way to the sitting area of Alec's quarters. Within minutes a decent sized man hogtied and unconscious was thrown into the room. I prefer my meals QOA, quiet on arrival, which just means they are knocked out. Some prefer to play games with their food or get high off the kill. Me, I'm just in it for the blood, not the thrills. The less resistance and screams the better the meal in my opinion. I dragged my dinner over to the table and threw him right in the center. I straddled his waist and sank my fangs into his neck. O Neg was my favorite blood type; it reminded me of a red wine, a little dry and bitter. It's an acquired taste. The only sweet blood I like is any type of virgin blood, but that's a rare commodity around here especially because we don't kill children. Deep into my meal, I sucked his blood with vigor. I couldn't get enough. I should've ordered a three-course dinner. I'd drained my dinner about halfway before I felt the bottom of my robe being lifted and Alec slide inside of me. I moaned into the neck of my dinner and continued to drink. Alec knew this was my favorite, drinking blood and being doggy style fucked always sends me into a frenzy. I lost track of how many times we drank and fucked that night and into the next several days. The only thing that broke us apart was when Alec was called away on official business.

I tried to await his return the best I could but the overwhelming hunger to feast was too much. I hit rock bottom that day after making a girls trip to Italy for my dinner. I was overcome with lust. The blood high I was flying on caused me to do the unspeakable. I jumped on the first vampire I happened to come across. I went on a downward spiral at that point, by the end of the week, I'd fucked my way through the entire guard. I was gaining quite the reputation in Volterra and I wasn't too proud of it. I tried to resist the urge, it got so bad at one point I had Jane lock me away in the east wing of the castle. I tried cutting down my blood consumption to one body a day I went through a dark period where I didn't even recognize myself. I was consumed with thoughts on the next neck I could sink my fangs into and the next body that would be beneath me. Jane stopped visiting after a while, she got tired of me begging for food and her brother. I even propositioned her and that was a new time low. I was too on edge to care, I began to worry that this was more than just my vampire instinct. I was addicted. I was addicted to the taste, the smell, the feeling of the blood running down my throat. The walls of my pussy being stretched to satisfaction I was going stir crazy.

The deafening sound of the bolt and chain echoed off the walls of my living quarters. I looked through the barred windows the sun was too low in the sky, it wasn't feeding time yet. Jane hadn't come in weeks after I practically attacked her the last time she visited. I was supposed to be out of here by now. I told her to lock me up for a month as sort of a detox, that was three months ago. Upon further reflection, I had been a tad bit crazed lately but they don't understand. This...hunger, I have inside of me is a beast that cannot be tamed. I'm starving every hour of every day and no matter how much I drink I can never get my fill. When I asked for this I just thought I was being greedy and needed to go on some kind of vampire diet but the longer I go without blood my limbs ache. My throat is itchy my eyes are sensitive to light. I'm in a constant fog and the only bit of clarity I get is when I'm drinking the human blood of my nightly snack. Sending me into a new kind of sex frenzy that has me clawing the doors to reach anyone. I've tried taking care of myself a few times and it doesn't sate me. I'm in misery, this constant emptiness inside is crippling. I haven't spoken to my daughter in months. I hear the whispers about me in the halls of the castle. Word, of course, got back to the Cullens and that earned me the divorce I'd been requesting. I guess this was too much of a taint to the Cullen image. That's why I'm confused as the door slid back and Edward walked in.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed, hiding my face from his view ashamed for the first time ever in front of him. I looked a mess, strung out even. The shine and luster of my dark mahogany waves were replaced with muddy, dull, lifeless strands of a lackluster mane. My pale skin almost green in color was even more translucent if possible. My eyes black and thirsty looked strained. I hadn't bothered to shower or change in weeks.

"Bella," he sighed looking at me.

"Why are you here?" I repeated tensely, ashamed for him to see me like this.

"I came to confirm the rumors I'd hope weren't true. I see I've traveled all this way for that hope to be crushed. Jeez, Bella look at yourself."

"Thanks for the Bella you look like shit update, you can go home now and gloat," I sneered.

"We warned you of the effects of human blood Bella but you chose not to listen now look at yourself," Edward scoffed.

"Fuck you, Edward," I spat.

"It seems you want to do that with everyone but me," he quipped.

His comeback burned with truth as the really shitty way I treated him plagued my mind filling me with an unfamiliar sense of remorse.

"Where's Ness?" I whispered.

"As if I'd bring her to see you like this. I've been the one back in Forks telling our daughter that the rumors are all lies. That the Volturi want to take us down for embarrassing them all those years ago. I told her that so much I deluded myself into believing it. Believing maybe if I came here you'd see me and realize how wrong you were and come back home to our family, but I see now you are too far gone Bella," he replied, dropping the thick stack of signed divorce papers at my feet.

"No, I'm not! I'm fine, I just went on a little binge, but I'm better Edward I swear. Just get me out of here, I want to come home to you and Ness and be a family again," I lied.

"I can't do that, Bella. Not until you get control of yourself," Edward replied.

"I'm plenty in control!" I argued.

"Psht," he scoffed.

"I am!" I argued.

I was willing to do anything say anything. Hunger was taking over me. If I could just convince this asshole long enough for him to get me out of here I could have my fangs into the next heart beating.

"You are thinking about the next thing you can drain right now!"

How did he know that?

"I hear a faint whisper of your mind Bella, When is the last time they feed you? You'd have to be incredibly weak for me to hear that." Edward asked worriedly.

This was my moment

"I told you this is just all a misunderstanding, they have been starving me out here. You had it right all along they are just out to punish us and destroy the Cullen name," I lied again.

Edward looked at me, weary whether to believe me or not. I threw every last bit of strength I had behind my shield protecting my lies.

"Well, you can't go anywhere like this, one minute."

Edward left the room then returned seconds later with an unconscious ginger tossing him at my feet.

"There are no animals I can get on such short notice in the city. We won't make it out of here if you're not at full strength. We will work on weaning you off human blood when we get home," Edward said kissing the top of my head like he used to. It took everything in me not to cringe.

"I'll be outside I can't watch this," he muttered.

Once the lock of the door clicked I pounced draining him in seconds flat. I was starving, still never truly satisfied. Longing surged through me as a familiar desire lingered in the air.

"I'm done," I whispered just low enough for him to hear.

Edward re-emerged and I was brought back to Isle Esme. I looked at Edward's strong jaw and broad chest. Familiar desire raced through my mind. I admired his frame for the first time in years with actual appreciation instead if disgust. The memories of how I seduced him left me wanting. He took me like a man trying his best to hold back but failing miserably. He gave it to me hard and animalistic and I loved every second of it.

"Your look better you colors returning-"

Edward was cut off by the force of my tackle. Lust clouded my braining and all I could think was, "take me!" I ripped Edward's shirt off his chest running my tongue down his abdomen before reaching for his belt. Next thing I know I'm flying in the air crashing into the vanity along the far wall mirror shattering and all.

"What the fuck Bella!" he roared.

Somewhere deep inside his rejection stung, but in the forefront of my mind, this was just a temporary roadblock.

"Edward, just shut up and fuck me! That was the problem in our marriage, I had to beg you to touch me. You want me back? You want me home? Fuck me, Edward, dammit! Screw my fucking brains out!" I screamed maniacally.

"Bella, get some help."

Before I could register the familiar sound of the reinforced locks bounced off the walls leaving me alone once more. I cried out in anguish collapsing to the floor dry sobbing in all my misery. Moments later the locked echoed again, hope rose within me.

Maybe he changed his mind.

Instead of Edward, I was met with a face I was nowhere near expecting.

"I really thought you had him there or is in Miss. Swan officially now?" Caius asked, eying the divorce papers on the floor.

"You know we could have your head for lying on the kings in such a manner?" Caius taunted.

"What do you want?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"Nothing really, this is just my shining moment. You thought you'd make a fool of the Volturi and here you are, we are the only ones who can pull in the reigns on you."

"I'm not cattle Caius," I spat.

"Yes, but I've heard you're quite the cowgirl," he grinned.

Anger stirred inside of me but something else did as well. My emotions were all merging into one, I wanted to slap him and sit on his face at the same time. I wanted to snap his neck but I wanted him to break my back. Arousal pooled in my panties as the scent filled the air.

"Dirty, dirty girl." he grinned.

I paid no attention to the words coming out of his mouth. I was too busy eyeing his lustrous blonde locks that looked perfect for tugging. I imagined running my fingers through his mane while he's in between my legs. Since he never shuts the fuck up I can show his mouth a new exercise.

"Shut up," I growled shoving him down on the cream couch of the room selected for my dungeon.

The room really wasn't a dungeon at all. It was furnished had TV, a bathroom with running water. I was just like a condo. Hell, I could be at the Crowne Plaza and this would still be a dungeon to me. I straddled his thighs discarding my flimsy dress in one fail swoop. Caius wasted no time discarding his pants and sliding inside me. We rocked back and forth giving into the desires of the flesh. I looked at his face, his eyes were closed as his head fell back basking in the pleasure of our bodies joining. The satisfaction on his face fueled my anger. I hate him and his stupid face and everything he stands for.

"Why am I doing this?" was the small thought in the corner of my mind overpowered by the sensations we were creating. It felt so good, so right and so satisfying. Caught up in the moment I did something I never do, not since Edward. My lips claimed his. I feasted on his tongue moaning at the sweet flavor of his mouth. We rocked back and forth our tongues dancing for dominance. I rode Caius just like the cowgirl he described, pushing all remorse and reservations out of my mind to enjoy the moment. Enjoy finally feeling fulfilled for the first time in months even years maybe. We came together exploding in perfect harmony. Caius slumped into the couch as I rolled to the side of him. I felt satisfied for once. My mind was clear, no all-consuming haze, no need for more. This felt foreign to me. I'm expecting to go into a frenzy and yet finally I feel okay, better than okay I felt strong. I looked over at Caius and the weight of my actions came crashing into me full force. This was a man I despised. He was leading the charge in the kill my daughter campaign and I just let him come inside of me. I felt sick to my stomach at the thought. Caius still had his head back and eyes closed basking in the afterglow. This was my chance now or never. If I was going to get out of here now would be my chance. I fled out of the room at lightning speed and kept running not looking back until I was safely outside of Volterra.

For the next few weeks, my need for blood decreased though my sex drive remained the same. After about two months, the old cravings came back full force and I went back to draining anyone I could get my hands on. Drinking human blood became a high I couldn't come down from. When I was drinking and fucking, all the pain and shame disappeared I'm not sure if that made the blood more addicting. I missed more and more calls from my daughter because of these blood dazes. I had to find a way to stop it, besides locking myself up for months at a time, then letting the king play with my hot pocket. I needed to find a better fix before I obliterated my relationship with my daughter. I came across a free clinic in England one night, I broke in to see if they had drugs just testing a theory on how they would affect vampires. Since the Cullens kept the effects of alcohol a secret I was curious about narcotics. They had a supply of blood bags in the back. Curious, I opened one and drank, and besides the temperature it was great. I felt clear and in control. Yeah, it tasted a little different, but it wasn't awful like animal blood. So I cut off drinking from the vain cold turkey. I'd only do that if it was an emergency. I decided to stick around London for a bit due to easy access for blood. I got a decent sized flat in North London. I explored the city daily, seeing if it would be worth making my new home.

London, England – Summer 2017

I went to the freezer and pulled out a bag of O Neg. I put a pot of water on the stove to boil. Once it was at a small simmer, I tossed the blood in for a few minutes just to properly warm it. Microwaved blood tastes worse than three-day-old takeout. I'd drink it cold before I'd drink it nuked. Combing through my cabinets, I found a bottle of bourbon. I tossed a splash of that in a mug and punctured the blood bag, pouring some in the mug behind the whiskey. I sipped my mixture with delight. I finished one cup before making myself another with the remaining blood.

I finished the rest of my blood and whiskey mixture. I rinsed my mug out before climbing back into bed. The blood had me horny and wanting for a lover that didn't exist. The whiskey left me hot, bringing a certain warmth to my cool skin. Something about blood will always make me hot, but at least I'm making more conscious decisions. I've been trying celibacy, which has been easier since I stopped drinking from the vain. The hunger inside me is growing stronger day by day though. I don't know how much longer I can hold off. I try to cling to the fact I'm doing this for my daughter. We are talking pretty much every other day. I'm not too fucked up off blood or busy on my back. I can be a decent mother like I used to be which makes the struggle worth it.

I emerged from my flat walking with no real direction. I was walking for quite some time and ended up cruising the streets of East London. It wasn't the safest neighborhood I'd stumbled upon, but it was a change of scenery. I walked a block or two, hoping a bar or something would be open. I wasn't in a rush to go back to my apartment and stare at the wall. I'd been in London for about two months and it had been pretty boring. Had I not discovered an easy blood supply I probably would have already left this overrated city.

I was headed north in search of a pub when a flickering light caught my eye. I moved closer and saw a sign for "Twilight 24 hour pub." I moved quickly but at a human pace towards the bar. I was stopped in my tracks by a blood-curdling scream. My head snapped in the direction of the scream. Crime happens every day. That is just the natural evolution of things I wouldn't dare get involved. Though I do get my kicks scaring the shit out of assholes, so maybe I'll take a peak. I darted towards the alleyway and saw a shadowy figure holding a woman up by the throat. I darted to them at vampire speed. It was only when his red eyes met mine that I was shocked frozen. I felt almost as if my dead heart thumped loudly in my chest. The blast left me winded.

What the fuck was that?

I took a few necessary breaths and looked closer at the figure, examining him as he examined me. His chestnut hair fell just below his strong jaw that housed his delicious stubble. I instantly imagined how the coarseness would feel rubbing against my inner thighs. His plump lips bathed in blood looked perfect for sucking. I eyed his creamy pale skin as my eyes traveled down his broad chest. Tiny bits of brown hair peeked out of his deep black V-neck. In his long brown coat, he was tall, his 6'5" frame towering over my 5'6" one. I felt so tiny next to him. I eyed his bulge shamelessly in the tight leather pants he wore. I imagined he could show me a good time. Being sex deprived for months at a time threw my mind right into the gutter. He was the most attractive vampire I'd ever seen and I was willing to break all my rules for just one night with him.

"What are you doing?" I asked him lamely, finding my voice through the fog that was my brain.

"Trying to grab dinner. Do you mind?" he scoffed.

"Help me, please!" the woman cried.

In an instant, he banged her head against the cement wall knocking her out cold.

"Was that necessary?" I asked.

"I like to eat dinner in peace, so if you don't mind…"

"You look familiar…" I said, eyeing his frame more intensely this time.

Memories of the Volturi debacle came rushing back. In the darkness of the night, I almost missed it. Garrett, Carlisle's friend.

"We've met before, Bella. Did I not leave a lasting impression?" He smirked.

"Not the one you're leaving now. No offense but you were so far up Kate's ass I barely formed an opinion of you," I explained.

"Fair enough…" Garrett shrugged.

Garrett tilted the blondes head to the side and sank his fangs directly into her carotid artery. I watched him drink with delight. He moaned bringing her neck closer to him taking in more blood. It was the hottest thing I'd ever seen. I clenched my legs together, hoping he didn't smell my arousal. His head instantly snapped to mine.

I guess he did.

"Do you want some?" He smirked.

"Of what?" I teased.

"Of her. Dining alone does get rather boring," He grinned.

"I guess she will do for now." I fake sighed, taking her wrist and bringing it to my lips.

"Bon appetit," I joked.

I knew it was wrong, draining this woman went against everything I've been avoiding for months, but for some reason, I couldn't bring myself to say no to him. We sank our fangs into her at the same time. I felt the tug of her blood in both directions. She tasted amazing. I tasted hints of marijuana in her blood which elevated my blood high. I was getting increasingly more turned on by the second. I moaned into her wrist, bringing her closer to me. I sucked with vigor and drained her to the last drop. I let go of her wrist and looked around. Garrett was watching me at this point, wide-eyed and amazed. I was hot and bothered all over again. In an instant, I snatched my clothes off and pounced.

Garrett's mouth opened as his eyes widened in surprise, but that didn't stop him from kissing me back with just as much enthusiasm. I tasted the blood on his tongue, sending me into a frenzy. I jumped into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist. Garrett pinned me to the wall next to the blonde's lifeless body as he ground his center into mine. The sensations felt amazing. I clawed at his back, trying to remove the nuisance that was his clothes. I instantly felt a cold breeze when Garrett's body left mine. When my eyes opened, I spotted him against the opposite side of the alley with his eyes closed, catching his breath with a tortured look on his face.

"We have to stop," he breathed.

"I don't see why," I said, making my way towards him.

"You are a married woman and Carlisle is a dear friend. I can't imagine what he will say if he found out about our feast and almost fuck."

"Carlisle is a tight ass, and I'm pretty sure he'd say he's not surprised. He knows that I drink human blood and that put the final nail in the coffin of my marriage," I said wiggling my empty ring finger in his face.

"How is that possible? You and Edward are mates," he said dumbfounded.

"Just like you and Kate are?" I asked, arching my eyebrow.

Rumors of their ugly breakup circled Volturi, so I knew how that story went.

"Touché," He grinned.

"Well, now I know my instant lady boner crusher, Edward. Thanks for bringing him up," I sighed, looking around for something to wear. I snatched the dress from our dinner, slipping it on, and threw my hair back into a high ponytail. Had I known it was that easy to break the spell I would have told Alec to use it ages ago. Or maybe subconsciously the sting of his rejection and the bad memories of our marriage created the perfect formula.

"So, do you live around here?" I asked.

"No, I have a compound on the outskirts, more recluse. What about you?"

"North London actually," I answered.

"Figures," he scoffed.

"Excuse me, it's not like I'm from there. They just happen to have the best flats," I argued.

"And the most expensive," he teased, "Yet you visit the slums for a meal. Do none of the hoity-toity folks deserve to be drained?"

"Isn't that the pot calling the kettle black? You're out here too. Besides, I wasn't out here for a snack."

"Oh yeah, then what are you out here for?" he quizzed.

"That's for me to know and for you to dot dot dot," I said taping him on the nose.

"You're trouble, aren't you?" Garrett smiled.

"The best kind."

In an interest to catch up, Garrett invited me back to his place. He warned me that he and two other vampires share the compound. He promised they were friendly enough though. I didn't want to admit it to myself, but since leaving the Cullens, I had felt rather lonely. I missed Emmett and Jasper. After I had Renesmee, Rosalie and I grew a sisterly bond. As my bond strengthened with them, Edward's and my bond dwindled. I hated that they were his family first, meaning he got them in the divorce. Sleepless nights were lonely without Emmett to play fight with, Jasper's war stories, and even Rose's celebrity gossip. It would be nice to be around people again and not trapped alone in the four walls of my flat.

We arrived at the compound which was more like an estate to me. The land stretched on for miles. I wasn't even aware they had a property like this right outside of London. There were two small houses we passed on our way up to the main house. They couldn't have been bigger than my condo. Garrett explained they were guest homes. We made it to the main house which was a fancy word for a mansion. The place was huge. It had three kitchens, thirteen bedrooms, twenty bathrooms, the list goes on. This screamed old money, which made me wonder just how long Garrett had been alive.

"How does someone acquire a property such as this?" I asked amazed as we came to the end of the tour.

"I didn't. I built it," he answered.

"Excuse me?" I choked.

"I went to school for architecture before I was drafted. When I was turned, I went through a few mixed up newborn years, but the passion never died, so I returned to it. I got my degree and mapped out this house. It took a while to get the money together for something like this, but I did. I was involved in every step even building it. "

"This is amazing," I told him honestly.

"I'm glad someone thinks so. I just think he's showing off," a voice said.

In walked a man, medium build with sandy-brown hair and an infectious grin.

"You're just jealous. Keep at it and you and Makenna will never get that house I promised," Garrett threatened.

"You'd never do that, mate, because that would mean you'd be stuck with us forever," the man joked.

"On second thought, let's speed up the timeline, shall we?" Garrett grinned.

"Oh no. Charles and I don't need a hack job with the way we hump. I don't need us falling through the floor like we did in the pool house." a woman's voice spoke, following the man into the den.

"The pool house wasn't meant for vampire fucking. That's why I didn't support it with titanium beams," Garrett argued.

"Design flaw on your part," she smirked.

"Bella, this is Makenna and Charles. Guys, this is Bella…"

"Cullen," they answered.

"Swan, actually. I ditched the ginger. I'm riding solo now," I announced, "I remember you two. You came to slaughter my daughter and me," I spoke immediately on the defense. I remembered their cloaked heads briefly. Though I do remember them leaving rather abruptly.

"Look, Bella, we are sorry about that. The Volturi called upon us and we believed them at first, but as soon as I detected your honesty and their deception, we hightailed it out of there I swear," Charles apologized.

"Detected?" I asked confused.

"Yes, I have the power to detect dishonesty. The moment I figured out we were being used, I grabbed Makenna and we left."

"It's okay. It's in the past as long as you're not here to kill me now," I joked.

"Depends, what are your intentions with my good friend Garrett here?" Charles asked.

"Well, I offered myself up on a silver platter ready to make him forget all about electrifying blondes, but he turned me down flat," I smiled.

"That's not exactly what happened. You're leaving out some information!" Garrett protested.

"About how we drained the blonde and then I snatched my clothes off and practically jumped your bones? I thought I was making you sound better," I blinked innocently.

"Dude…" Charles shook his head.

"How did you resist?" Makenna asked, eyeing my frame appreciatively.

"At least someone appreciates the goods," I winked.

"It's not that I don't appreciate them. They're nice, but I'm no cheater. I just had to check. Sue me."

"Dude, if I was single and a hottie snatched her clothes off and jumped me, you could paint a scarlet letter on my chest. I wouldn't give a fuck if she was married, engaged, involved, undead, who cares."

"I'm saying!" I agreed, high fiving Charles.

"That's because you both have questionable morals," Garrett argued.

"Says the guy draining his ex's stunt double in a dark alley in East London." I challenged, arching my eyebrow at him.

"Gare, you need to let this Kate thing go…" Makenna sighed.

"I have," he argued.

"No, you haven't. All of your meals resemble Kate. I know you want to hurt her like she hurt you, but the best revenge is to move on and be happy. Kate will always be a miserable bitch, but you don't have to be," Charles said, placing a gentle hand on his friend's shoulder.

"I ran from the acceptance of the failed marriage between Edward and me. I avoided it for as long as I possibly could until I had to let go. I had to stop trying to hold onto the crumbles of the reality I created for myself. I chose to go find myself and what makes me happy. I refused to dwell on the past because that's just what it is…the past. And no matter how hard we wish we, can't change it. So let go, choose you. Don't give Kate power over you anymore," I told him.

I think my words resonated with him. I received a small smile and nod. That earned grins from Charles and Makenna.

"Why are you both smiling like the cat that ate the canary?"

"Oh, no reason…" Makenna lied.

"You two are up to something…" I said, eying them.

"Hey, Bella, you plan on sticking around for a couple of days?" Charles asked.

"Sure, I don't see why not. I don't have anything to do," I replied.

"Perfect." She smiled.

"I hope this room is okay. I'll be right down the hall if you need anything," Garrett said showing me the bedroom. It was an array of burgundy and gold. The California king bed was towards the back as the large sitting area took up the majority of the room. The 90-inch flat screen was prominent on the wall. I saw out of the corner of my eye an en-suite with the most glorious shower I'd ever seen. I'd definitely be checking that out later. When he turned his back to me there was a sudden need for air. The idea of him away from me in the slightest left me uneasy.

"No offense Garett, but if I wanted to sit in a box, I'd just go home," I answered scrambling for an excuse to keep him near.

"No, don't get me wrong you are welcome to any part of the compound. I just figured… I don't know what I figured." He rubbed his neck nervously.

"Let's do something fun?" I suggested.

"What do you have in mind, Ms. Swan?"

"Well…"

"Sshh…" I giggled.

"You're going to blow this for us," I warned.

"I'm sorry, but I can't believe we are actually doing this," He chuckled.

"That makes two of us, mate," Charles agreed.

"I can't believe there are actually farms around here," I laughed

"Will you three stop your cackling? You guys are worse than a pack of hyenas," Makenna joked.

His low laughter brought back memories of the silly things Emmett, Jasper, and I used to get into. Edward always scoffed at our behavior, but we sure got a kick out of acting like idiots.

My heart was in my throat as Garrett's smile took my breath away. His teeth were perfect and bright. He had one small dimple that made an appearance at the left corner of his mouth. His eyes had a certain gleam in them. I wondered what color his eyes were before he was turned. He was breathtaking as a vampire. I can only imagine him human. Something inside me stirred. When I was changed, my heart was dead and frozen cold, so why do I feel like it is pumping blood through my veins? Why do I feel like I suddenly need air when vampires don't need to breathe? Why do I have to refrain from the urge to touch him whenever and wherever I can? I don't know if it's the blood still coursing through me, but I want to devour him right here.

"Bella, are you okay?" he asked.

"Come on," I said, dragging him through the trees and dismissing the throbbing in my chest.

"I can't believe I agreed to this," Makenna whispered.

"Well, you're in it, so…there's no turning back now," I smiled.

"Don't make me tell Luca you've gone soft on us, Kenz," Charles teased.

"Never," she growled.

"Luca's coming?" Garrett quizzed.

"Yeah, I spoke to him earlier. It's been awhile since he visited, so I thought I'd send an invitation," Makenna answered.

"Who's Luca?" I whispered.

"Makenna's Great Uncle," Charles answered.

"Why such an impromptu invitation Makenna?" I quizzed knowingly.

"Let's make a game out of it, shall we? Whoever can tip the most cows before the owners come out wins," Makenna clapped, blowing me off jumping straight to the task at hand.

"How about bonus points for whoever tips the largest," Charles offered.

Something told me there was more to the invitation than that, but I chose to let it go for now.

I dashed forward, creeping up slowly to the biggest cow on the ranch. I extended my hands, ready to tip, and Charles sped over in a flash.

"Too slow Swa-" he was cut off by a rough kick to the chest, sending him flipping over a calf and tumbling to the grass.

Laugher erupted from all three of us. Charles stood up with a groan and a limp.

"Has anyone ever told you do not stand behind a cow?" I snorted.

"I thought that was only pertaining to a horse," he whined.

I gently tipped the cow before Charles had a chance to enact his revenge on her.

Due to our noisiness, most of the cows had woken, making this extravaganza a little more challenging. Charlie tipped his first cow, and Garrett was on his second before the porch light of the farm came on.

"Hey, what's going on out there?" we heard a voice yell.

Charles and Makenna fled. I stayed behind to pick up as many cows as I could. If you leave them on the ground, they could die. I was a jokester, not an asshole. I'm a firm believer in evolution. These cows were not to die at my hands they have a purpose as we all do. The cow must fulfill its purpose before it gets strung up for slaughter. Garrett stayed behind and helped. We were tipping the last cow back on his feet as we heard the clack of a shotgun.

"What are you two doing on my property?" he said, eyeing Garrett and me, the barrel of his shotgun pointed at Garrett.

"Admiring your cattle?" I squeaked.

"At one in the morning? I don't think so," he announced.

"Run!" I yelled, speeding off with Garrett in tow.

Neither of us flinched as rounds flew past us our whole way off the farm.

We made it back to the compound at record speed, laughing our whole way inside.

"What took you guys so long?" Charles asked, meeting us in the foyer.

"We didn't run like you pussies. We stayed and got the cows back up," Garrett spared.

"I thought the point of cow tipping was to tip them and run?" he asked confused.

"Cow tipping is just an urban legend, Charles. It's impossible for humans to tip a cow. Not only are they too heavy, you would have to tip them when they're sleeping. Humans are too noisy. And if a cow is tipped and left, they will die. This was for fun. We didn't want to kill the cows," I answered.

"Wait, so cow tipping isn't really a thing?" Makenna yelled from the theater.

We made our way to the theater, eyeing Makenna curled up on one of the recliners, Jack Daniels in hand.

"Nope, just an old urban legend," I informed her.

"Hmm-" She shrugged, taking a swig from the bottle.

"I hope you plan on sharing." I eyed her.

"The more the merrier!" She laughed, already three sheets to the wind.

We all settled in the theater and turned on Thor Ragnarok, sharing a few laughs and arguments on the best Avengers. It felt good to be around other vampires again. I didn't realize how much I missed it.

After the movie, Charles and Makenna left, bidding us a good night. It wasn't long before we heard kisses and moans from their suite. Garrett and I shared a look exiting the theater room making our way to the other end of the compound. I watched Garrett's tall frame lead the way. His ass was so grabbable. I wonder how it would feel beneath my hands when I'd pull him deeper inside of me. My clit throbbed as arousal pooled in my panties. I watched as Garrett stumbled a bit, but he didn't break his stride. He led me to a small creek out towards the back of the estate. It was beautiful. He had stones going from big to small, traveling down the path to the creek. Small lanterns hung off the trees, illuminating a small glow around the water. The soft glow mixed with the moonlight cast a warm glow on Garrett's pale skin. I looked at him and became breathless. He was eyeing my mouth darkly. I hadn't realized I'd been biting my lips. I guess old habits die hard. He grabbed my chin between his thumb and index finger, turning my face to meet his. He ran his thumb over my lips, pulling it from my teeth. I released a shaky breath and craned my head up to look into his eyes. Garrett ran his nose along the side of my face, down my cheek and onto my neck, then into my hair. He inhaled my scent and chuckled darkly to himself. He ran his fingertips along the planes of my throat. I whimpered in desire. He was driving me crazy with a few simple touches. He placed soft kisses down my jaw until he reached my lips. His lips hovered over mine, his bottom lip tickling my top. I inched up on my tippy toes, grabbing his neck and brought him the rest of the way down to me. His strong hands gripped my waist, bringing me as close to him as possible. I wrapped my arms around his neck, running my fingers through his soft dark locks. He bit my bottom lip. I moaned, tugging his soft strands roughly until a deep groan sprang from his chest. He broke away from my lips, leaning his forehead to mine, and breathing deeply. His eyes were closed as the tortured look from the alley returned.

"Who are you Bella Swan?" he mumbled.

"That's what I left to figure out…" I whispered.

"And what have you figured out so far?"

"I'm a mother before anything…"

"Mmhm…" he hummed, as he traced the length of my jaw with his nose.

"A Vampire…"

"Uh huh…"

"A woman with wants and needs…"

"And what do you need Bella?" he whispered, breath tickling my ear.

"You," was right on the tip of my tongue, but something was holding me back. I couldn't explain why the words were stuck in my throat. I'd practically attacked him in the alleyway, but somehow this felt different. This felt real, like the start of something. I just closed the chapter with Edward; the ink wasn't even dry on my divorce papers. Am I really ready for this?

"Time…" I answered instead, hoping he understood the meaning of my request.

"Well, you are immortal dear so time you have plenty of."

"What about time with you?" I asked shyly.

"You can have as much of that as you want," he replied.

"Really?" I asked eyes locked on his. I needed to know if he was in this and could wait for me. Though physically I was ready to move on, emotionally I was crippled, and I didn't know when or if I could ever open my dead heart to another.

Garrett lowered us to the ground. He opened his legs, pulling my back against his chest and resting his chin on the top of my head.

"I'll be here for whatever you need, Bella."

"Thank you," I whispered.

"No thanks needed. I know what it's like to be by myself. Before I meet Charles and Makenna, I wandered these streets alone. I was doing what I had to do to survive not realizing by surviving I wasn't living. I realized I loved traveling and learning things about different species, races, and cultures. I became an explorer for quite a while. That's how I came across Carlisle in my studies to understand a vampire's way of life. He did a paper about vampirism sustaining off animal blood. I was intrigued, so I went to ask him questions about it and even tried it. It was worse than microwaved blood."

I smiled at that statement because I felt the same way.

"I liked the feel of humanity it brought out in me though. I wasn't hurting others anymore and that had a positive impact on how I felt about myself. But realistically, it wasn't enough to sustain me. I was hungry more often, weaker, more agitated. I became a brooding little twat and I realized the diet had negative effects. I chose to go back on human blood, but I decided I would only drink from criminals, the ones who elude the law. Rapists and child molesters top my list. It gives me a sense of purpose ridding the earth of those who don't appreciate life. It's my way to feel like I'm contributing to the world."

"So how do the Kate look-alikes play into this?" I asked, giving him my best bitch brow.

It wasn't as good as Rosalie's or even Jane's, but it was effective enough.

"I'm just a vampire. I admit I'm flawed. I've only been doing that since the breakup nine months ago, but I promise I'm done with it." He sighed, looking into my eyes.

Something was so attractive about his honesty and vulnerability. He wasn't pretending to be perfect, he wasn't creating an image to uphold. His was simply him, and I liked that very much.

"Okay." I nodded.

I didn't judge him or scold him. I'm the last one to cast stones. If Garrett says he's done I believe and have faith in him. I have no reason not to. I don't have a problem with any of the meals he chooses. I respect his choices, but the way he spoke about feeding off criminals connecting him to his humanity, I'd hate for him to let that blonde bitch take anymore from him than she already has. He doesn't realize that the bitterness and resentment is now taking away his choice. I hope he can see past her and the demise of the relationship and really get back to who he really is, that's all I want for him.

"So that must have been amazing to explore all those places and learn different things. I'd like to do that one day," I said, changing the subject.

"What's stopping you?" he asked.

"My child. I wish I could bring her with me and share these things with her. I want to show her the world. I can't imagine experiencing all these wonderful things without her but..."

"The wolf," he stated.

"He's her imprint. It's a bond that can't be broken."

"I've looked into supernatural children. A mother-daughter bond is a powerful tool that comes with special gifts. And because you are considered her Sire as well, there is a sire bond. She must do as you tell her. She will always be respectful of you and obey you. She will never stop loving you. It's on par with a mating bond. It would physically kill her to choose between you two," Garrett spoke.

"I'd never make her chose."

"Let me ask you, how many times has she called you?" he asked.

"She calls me at least every other day," I answered.

"And how does she sound?"

I reflected on his question, embarrassed that in my own sadness, I never noticed hers.

"Oh my god! I'm a terrible mother!" I cried.

"Don't ever say that! You're a wonderful mother. You love her fiercely. You did what you had to do to protect her at all costs. Don't ever doubt that. But a mother needs to find herself, so she can guide her daughter. If you are lost, what good would that have done for your baby girl?"

"But I'd be there."

"You are always with her because she is a part of you and that is what will hold you two together while you're apart."

Garrett held me as I dry sobbed for my daughter. Something in me was changing. I felt a strong tug in my heart. I couldn't explain it. The thump in my heart beats stronger every minute I'm around him.

Can vampires have heart attacks?

We stayed outside by the creek for hours just talking. I told him of my very fuzzy memory of my human life. He shared childhood stories that made me laugh.

After laying in the grass for some time, I could really use that shower. I excused myself, heading back to the mansion. I went back to the living quarters Garrett showed me. I turned on the shower, pulling off my hand-me-down dress and climbed into the glass shower. I tapped the panel to get the heat and water pressure to my desire. I moaned in delight as water sprouted from all directions, soothing my aching muscles. I was amazed that as a vampire you can still get sore. I was mentally and physically exhausted. I hated that we can't sleep even though at times it felt like we need it. I climbed out of the shower and wrapped a towel around me. After walking back to the bedroom, I sat on the bed and combed the tangles out of my hair. I heard a soft knock at the door and could feel Garrett's presence behind it.

"Come in," I answered.

"Oh sorry," he said, turning around as if trying to preserve my decency.

"Please, we are far past modesty." I scoffed.

He turned around, facing me and giving me a small smile.

"What do you need, Gare?" I asked.

"Here, I brought you some clothes. Also, I just wanted to know if you wanted to grab a quick bite. Half a small female isn't enough to sustain me.

"Well um…" I hesitated. How could I word my blood dazes without scaring him off?

"What's wrong, Bella?" he asked,

"Well, you see...I can't drink from the vein," I told him.

"I saw you do it with ease earlier, so you most certainly can."

"No no, you don't understand. When I drink from the vein I get…"

"Get what, Bella?" he asked inching closer to me, confusion in his eyes. If I could blush right now, I'd be scarlet.

"I get in this blood daze where I try to fuck anything with legs and drain anything with a pulse. It starts an unbreaking circle of blood and sex until I get my fill just long enough to break myself out of it." I explained.

Garrett eyed me for a while in silence. The lines of his forehead creased as if he was deep in thought.

"I don't want to speak out of turn. Luca is arriving tomorrow, and he will be able to tell if my suspicion is true," he spoke.

"What suspicion?" I asked worriedly.

"We will cross that bridge if we get to it. Don't worry about it tonight. I'll make a trip to the clinic and grab a few blood bags. When you're done dressing, you can join Makenna and Charles. They are in the game room, or you can spend some time to yourself. I'll be back in a bit," he explained.

"Okay," I whispered.

Garrett eyed me one last time before backing out of the room. I laid back on the bed and groaned in annoyance. Why when I know that he's coming back do I feel like I don't want him to go? My heartstrings tugged as emptiness consumed me. I got dressed quickly, throwing my hair in a sloppy bun before going to the game room in search of Makenna and Charles.

"Hey, guys," I smiled, plopping down in the beanbag chair and eyeing the TV.

"Hey," Makenna smiled.

"What are y'all playing?" I asked.

"I'm playing Tekken. Charles is getting his ass whooped in Tekken. There is a difference," she teased.

"That's because you do the same moves over and over again. That's cheating," he whined.

"Whatever it takes to win." She grinned.

I laughed at their silliness. Having them around lessened the pain in my chest to bearable. I hope Garrett gets back with the blood. I'm probably just hungry.

"He's here!" Makenna squealed with delight.

"Somedays, I swear she loves him more than me," Charles joked.

"Shut up. I love you both the same, just in different ways," she argued.

"Some days more than others…" Charles muttered. She glared at him. That comment earned him an elbow to the gut as the doorbell rang.

The door swung open and Makenna jumped into her uncle's arms. They were practically identical. Her black hair matched his, and their pale skin mirrored each others. With bright grins on both their faces, it was the perfect family reunion until he looked past her and his eyes met mine.

"Isabella Cullen, is this some sort of joke?" he scoffed.

I looked at him in confusion. How does he know me, and why does he seem to be angry?

"You tell me Garett finally met his real mate and I walk in here to the infamous Bella Cullen. She has a whole mate, a hybrid kid, and fucked her way through half of Volterra. After how Blondie broke his heart, you are just setting him up for failure all over again!" the angry vampire snapped.

I choked in anguish as a big blow landed to my chest. The force was so impactful it brought me to my knees. I looked up to see who hit me, but no one had moved. Everyone was just looking at me with concern.

"What's happening?" I heard faintly, but everything was going dark.

Am I dying?

"Uncle Luca, help her!"

Garrett had me in his arms in seconds. I looked up to his worried eyes as he stroked my hair softly whispering everything will be alright.

"Get her a meal stat," Luca barked.

"Luca, about that…" After that, I slipped into the dark abyss of my subconscious.

When I came to, I first noticed the unfamiliar black satin sheets I was wrapped in. Garrett's scent surrounded me which instantly let me know I was safely in his room. The first face I saw was my Garrett's. A sigh of relief escaped his throat. Without thinking, I rushed into his lap, pressing his lips to mine hoping to kiss his pain anyway. He clutched me tight and whispered he was glad I was okay. His voice instantly calmed me. I felt safe and protected; I felt love. I was confused because these feelings were so different than the last time I saw him.

How long have I been out?

"What happened?" I asked.

"Well long story short, princess, your shield was killing you," he answered.

"What?"

"Apparently you're my mate and you're shield was protecting your emotions from yourself. But if mates are kept apart even emotionally, it starts to take its toll. I was aware of my feelings. I knew I loved you from that first glance in the alleyway. It confused me because the first time we met, I didn't feel that way, but according to Luca, your mother and daughter bond took priority at that time, so your shield concealed it.

"H-how-" I was so confused I felt my mind spinning, but one thing that I wasn't confused about was the way I felt. I could feel the love and desire vibrating between us. My mind was jumbled as a million things that didn't make sense swam around in my head. I just wanted to be in the here and now with Garrett. I wanted to silence my mind and embrace my future. I snatched Garrett's shirt off his body and eyed his well-defined abs below. That was the first time I'd seen his bare chest, and it did not disappoint. I licked down his chest, paying special attention to each of his six abs. His frame was well built and defined. I had a man in my arms, and I wanted to cherish every inch of him. He let me explore him for a minute, running my hands over his broad shoulders and palming his pecs as I fully straddled him.

"Bella, baby, there's something else we need to discuss."

"Mhmm…and what's that," I said, kissing down his neck.

"Uhh…I think Luca can explain it better…" he said nervously.

"Can he explain later?" I asked, kissing down his chest.

"Not exactly…" he mumbled.

"Fine…" I huffed.

"Plus, I don't think your daughter wants to hear us mating for the first time," He laughed.

"Renesmee is here?" I asked shocked.

"She's been here for about a week now. She refused to leave your side. She just stepped out to get some food. She's going to be pissed she wasn't here when you woke up."

"Jacob?"

"He had pack business and couldn't leave,"

"So she came without him? Is she okay?" I asked panicked. I didn't want anything to hurt my baby girl.

"She's fine. Your maternal bond is in focus right now. Once she is sure you are okay, it won't be long before she needs to reconnect with him."

"How do you know?" I asked worriedly.

"Luca has been reassuring everyone for the past few days," He laughed.

"How long was I out?"

"Two weeks."

"TWO WEEKS!" I yelled.

"Your mind needed time to heal. That's why it shut down," Garrett explained.

I stood up on shaky feet and began pacing the length of the bedroom.

"I hate to break it to you angel, but everyone knows you're up now. They are all waiting for you."

"They?"

"Your ex-husband was your daughter escort," Garrett replied.

I eyed Garrett's demeanor for any signs that he was uncomfortable with having Edward here. All I saw was love and confidence in his eyes. That just turned me on even more.

"Bella, stay with me," He chuckled.

"Oh right. Okay, let's go…" I sighed.

Hand in hand we walked downstairs just as Renesmee was coming in.

"Mom!" she yelled, rushing to me at vampire speed and pulling me into a bone-crushing hug. I hugged her back almost as tight. I kissed the top of my baby girl's head. I didn't realize how much I missed her until completeness filled me with her simple touch.

"Are you okay? How are you feeling?" she bombarded me with questions.

"I'm good, Ness, better than ever now that you're here," I answered truthfully.

I looked past her and met the grim expression of my ex-husband.

"Edward," I spoke coolly.

"Bella, I'm glad to see you on your feet," he answered.

"Thank you, I've heard you've been looking for me."

"Mom, we want you to come home," Renesmee looked at me hopefully.

A pain echoed in my chest at the thought of returning to Forks, or anywhere Garrett wasn't.

"Do you really hate Forks that much that you moved to a different country to escape it?" Renesmee spoke hurt, taking in my pained expression.

"It's not that Ness…" I tried to explain.

"Then what is it, mom. Do you want me to say it? Because I will. I need you mom. Please come home with us," she yelled.

My heart was heavy. I started to get dizzy as black spots entered my vision. I clutched Renesmee's arm tight.

"Mom!" Renesmee said panicked.

"Bella, stay calm. Anywhere you go, I'll go," The soothing voice of my mate whispered in my ear. Instantly, I felt the pressure on my chest ease and my vision became clear. I took a deep breath and eyed my love, giving him a silent thank you with my eyes.

"Okay, is someone finally going to tell me what the fuck is going on?" Edward scoffed.

"That's her mate," Luca spoke, entering the room finally.

"Bullshit!" Edward snapped.

"Sorry for the delay, Bella. I was just doing some further research in the study with Makenna and Charles," Luca said, ignoring Edward's outburst.

Both Makenna and Charles rushed to me, telling me they were glad I was okay.

Garrett took mine and Renesmee's hands leading us to the couch. We all sat on the sofa eyeing Luca.

"Okay, excuse my less than spectacular tact but what the fuck is going on with me?" I'd had enough I just wanted everything to make sense.

"So, Bella, it appears Garrett is your mate, but you weren't emotionally available to accept him the two times you came across him. Your shield is your protector of all things supernatural physically, mentally, and spiritually. Your shield knew you weren't ready, so in an effort to protect you, it tried to keep it from you. However; the more time you spent together, your need to mate became clearer. So if you experienced chest pain headaches, confusion those are all signs of your mating bond trying to break through. When I announced Garrett was your mate, and I apologize for the delivery I didn't know you were a shield then, if I had, I'd definitely have gone about it differently," Luca apologized. "Your mating bond broke through your shield. That caused you to shut down until your shield was healed. It's pretty much your version of a lockdown mode."

"It's okay. How would you have known my shield was killing me?" I scoffed.

"So is my mom okay to come home?" Renesmee asked, squeezing my hand tightly.

I loved my daughter and as much as I dreaded Forks, I'd go back for her. Something inside me just knew it.

"She's okay to go as long as Garrett is welcomed. I am aware of your imprint. The mating bond is similar. Without each other, they will die. In your mom's case, it is more severe," Luca announced.

"And why is that?" she asked.

"Well...Bella, I don't know how to say this, so I'm just going to rip off the Band-Aid. You carry the succubus gene," he said.

"Huh- what gene, what?" I asked confused.

Garrett asked me to look into these blood dazes you described, and I began looking into your lineage. On your mother's side, you all are descended from the succubus. Every century the trait is passed on the gene is dormant until your 21st year and because it's a supernatural trait just because you are a vampire, the clock doesn't stop. So what you thought was bloodlust was actual lust. Succubi mainly feed through sex; the blood just keeps your energy up and sustains you to feed. So that's why you can go for months at a time in this cycle because your succubus side hasn't had her fill yet. The mistake you were making was never taking your lover's chi. The overwhelming hunger was never from bloodlust, it was from lack of chi. You never feed your succubus side properly. You were compensating for your need for chi with blood, that's why you could drain body after body and still feel that hunger. Especially if you were having sex while doing it. The most pleasurable way for a succubus to take chi is through sex but you don't have to. Be careful not to drain your lover of their chi or you can kill them. As a vampire succubus hybrid, feeding tends to go that way. You'll drain your meal of chi and blood because that's your natural instinct. Because you weren't feeding properly, you went into these feeding frenzies trying to sustain yourself. Feeding the way of the succubi hybrid will sustain you for months at a time. You won't need blood at all and you will only need small amounts of chi over the next few weeks to sustain you. Now your sex drive will remain high because that's just in a succubus's nature. You can get chi from your mate, and he being your mate, can sustain you for a good while. In case of an emergency, you can take most of his chi, and it will last you a while, but it will leave him a bit weak, so I'd recommend not doing that. You should only take a little at a time as needed and feed on outside sources.

"How do I even do that? What if I hurt him?" I asked panicked.

"That's the thing, Bella, we don't know. Succubus secrets are just that…secrets. You need to locate an ancestor to teach you the way of the succubi. They are the only ones who can teach you control."

"Great, how am I going to find that?" I groaned.

"That's what I was just looking into. I found a succubus still alive in your lineage. Succubi can be immortal depending on how much they feed. You have a great-great-great aunt in Louisiana that can help you. Here's the info," Luca said, passing me the paper.

"Dedra Romano?"

"That's her," He nodded.

"Baby girl, I need to do this. I need to learn to control whatever's inside of me," I explained to her.

"Actually, Renesmee, you need to go too. You carry the trait as well, and we are not sure because of your rapid aging if the trait could trigger sooner for you," Luca explained.

"You said every century, Luca. How does my baby have it?" I asked angrily.

Because she is the last of your lineage that can procreate. That's part of the reason you were able to make her. In an effort to continue existence, if there is even a small part of the human left in a line, they will get pregnant to carry on the lineage. Since you are now officially dead, someone needed to carry on your line. As well as because she will be alive through the next century, it could be dormant inside of her."

"Mom?" Renesmee hugged me, scared.

"It's okay, baby girl," I soothed her.

"The hell it is. My daughter's not going to be a succubus baby factory!" Edward roared.

"I'm sorry. That is the way of the succubi. There is nothing we can do."

"I'm not ready to be a mom," she cried.

"It's okay, Ness. We can go to Louisiana and figure this thing out. At least we will know what we are working with as far as time. Let's not panic before we have to," I reassured her.

"I need to call Jake," she cried, rushing out of the room.

"And one last thing," Luca said.

"There's more? What more could there possibly be?" I asked annoyed.

"Succubi are very private. Outsiders are not welcomed. Succubi and mates only," he announced.

"Okay, Garrett is my mate. What's the problem?" I asked confused.

"You must consummate your bond before you go," Luca answered.

"Huh?" I asked.

"Babe, we have to have sex and claim each other," Garrett explained.

"Oh…" I said. If I'd been human, I'd be beet red.

I looked around the room and there were grins on Makeena and Charles' faces, a scowl from Edward, a soft smile from Garrett, and Luca looking anywhere but near us.

"I assume our flight is booked," I stated.

"Tomorrow at nine." Makenna sang.

"Well, that simply isn't enough time." I winked at my mate.

Everyone but Edward laughed.

"It isn't, but we will make do."

"That we will," I agreed, kissing him and not caring who was around.

All four vampires scattered like roaches as our kisses intensified. I felt the wind in my hair and the breeze on my back. The next thing I knew, we were in one of the guesthouses. We barely passed the threshold before our clothes were shed. My bare back was pressed against the hardwood of the entryway as I clung to Garrett's broad shoulders.

"Yes," I moaned. I'd never felt more complete in my life.

Garrett trailed his tongue down my neck nipping at my skin with his fangs, sending me into a frenzy. I grabbed his delicious ass and pushed his dick towards my dripping core. His firm ass felt better in my grasp then I expected.

"Fuck me, please fuck me," I begged. I needed him inside of me before I spontaneously combusted.

"I'm going to fuck you, and then I'm going to mark you. From this day forward you will belong to me and no one else ever again," he said sternly, breaking contact with my neck to make sure I understood.

"I'm yours always and forever," I whispered.

His lips claimed mine, and he slid into me. My back arched off the floor as my hips rose to take in his exquisite length.

"Mine, mine, mine!" he chanted over and over, and he drove into me.

I was so close to cumming. Venom pooled in my mouth, but this time, I felt as if I was on autopilot before I could stop myself. My fangs sunk into the flesh of his shoulder. He moaned deeply as his fangs pierced my neck. It hurt in the most delicious way. Pleasure overtook me, and I came hard around his length. Seconds later, Garrett stilled inside of me, marking me with his scent. I rolled him on his back, cradling his face to mine and capturing his lips with a soft kiss. An animalistic instinct took over and I sucked his lips with vigor. He tasted so good. It was better than virgin blood. I kissed and kissed, enjoying his taste. I couldn't get enough of my mate's flavor.

"Bella, stop…" a hoarse whisper came from my mate. I stilled above him. I looked at my mate's weak smile, and I panicked.

"Oh, my god, baby, what did I do? Help!" I yelled.

Images of Caius flashed in my mind. He had the same small weak smile barely holding his head up. The same feeling of fulfillment coursed through me as everything Luca said came together in my mind.

"Luca, oh my god help!" I shouted. He has to know something I could do to help him.

In a flash, Luca, Makenna, Charles, and to my embarrassment Renesmee came rushing into the guest house.

"Really, you two couldn't even make it to the bed?" Charles laughed earning him a slap on the head from Makenna.

"Wrong time and place," she scolded.

"Mom, you're eyes!" Renesmee pointed.

I ran to the mirror, and a blue glow surrounded my irises.

"What's happening to me?" I screamed, "Luca help, I don't know what happened. I think I drained him or something." Shoving my freak out aside to focus on the fact I probably killed my mate.

Luca bent down checking something within Garrett's chest.

"He's alive. He just needs blood. Bella could use some too. Go find someone," he ordered Makenna.

"This has never happened before?" Luca questioned?

"By the time I turned twenty-one, Edward and I hadn't had sex in a year. I went looking for my fill elsewhere, but I never kissed anyone. I considered the gesture too intimate. Until..." I paused, ashamed for the name to slip from my lips, especially in my daughter presence.

"Until… come on, Bella. This is crucial information." Luca demanded.

"Caius…" I whispered.

"Mom!" Renesmee gasped shocked.

"Look it was a one-time mistake please don't hate me." I cried.

"I could never hate you but mom…"

"I know…" I sighed.

"I heard the rumors but I thought almost fucked him to death was a joke," Luca said surprised.

"Not so funny now is it?" I asked.

"Not even close," Luca replied.

An hour later, they returned with a forty-year-old man begging for his life.

"Mom, you aren't going to do this are you?" Renesmee asked.

"This is who we are, Ness." I tried to explain.

I helped Garrett drain the man until his color returned and he was able to stand.

"Oh my god, baby. I'm so sorry," I cried, pulling him into my arms.

"It's okay, Love. We just need to get on down to Louisiana and learn how to control it. It will be okay. He assured me, stroking the back of my head. Here I'm supposed to be comforting him and yet he is taking care of me.

We arrived at the airport early the next morning. I let Ness say goodbye to her father in private as Garrett and I boarded the plane.

"You nervous?" he asked with a knowing look.

"A little. I just got used to being a vampire now I'm a succubus on top of this?" I muttered.

"And you will get used to it, and learn to embrace it as you have vampirism. This time you won't be going through this alone. You have me and your daughter in your corner and you are stuck with us for life. I will always have your back, Bella. I love you. You are my other half, my confidant, and I am yours. I'm here for you to share your victories, your failures, your greatest successes, and your biggest fears. I want to know it all, Bella. I want to know you and be with you for the rest of my life," Garrett said. I hugged him close to me, placing a soft kiss on his lips.

"Okay, break it up. I still eat human food. I can barf in here," Renesmee said, plopping down next to me on the end seat.

"Like you and Jacob are not worse. I've seen more of your tongue than I ever cared too," I announced. She stuck her tongue out at me, and we all shared a laugh.

"Speaking of Jacob, I assume he will be joining us?" Garrett asked Renesmee.

"Yeah, he said pack law allows him to break from his duties in the need of your imprint, so he will be down in a few days. I just hope he can handle all of this," she said worriedly.

"I'm sure he can. He loves you, Ness, and I believe he will be there for you no matter what just like I am for your mom," he announced.

"I feel like I'm betraying dad, but you are perfect for my mom. I'm glad she found you," she replied.

I looked to my right at my mate then to my left at my daughter. I thought back to last year when I was lost and cast out by the Cullens, how broken I felt but now on the plane with the two most important people in my life, I felt whole. I didn't know what the future would hold, but as long as I have them, I knew I could conquer anything.