The Story Of Us:
Summary: Remus and Tonks broke up because Remus claimed the too old, etc. Now she is thinking about the story of them.
A/N: Sorry I am watching The Lion King and I can't really focus on writing author's notes.
I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us
How we met and the sparks flew instantly
People would say they're the lucky ones
Nymphadora Tonks woke up, and she groggily looked over at her alarm clock. It was noon. It was a Saturday. She had finished a nine-hour work shift at the Ministry the previous day only to go straight to a twelve-hour mission for the ministry. She had finally gotten home at four a.m. and she was exhausted! She had tried to fall asleep right away, knowing she had an order meeting that night too. However, it took her three hours to fall asleep because she couldn't get her mind off of Remus. Her mind had drifted back to the day they had met. She knew the moment they were introduced that they would be good friends.
Tonks walked into 12 Grimmauld Place behind Mad-Eye and Kingsley. She was going to attend her first Order of the Phoenix meeting. When she walked in the door, she saw there was a group of people already seated around the table, so only three seats were left. Two were on one side between whom she recognized as Arthur Weasley and whom she knew was Sirius Black from the photos her mom had of him. The third was across from Sirius, between a guy, deep in conversation with Sirius, and a witch she didn't know. Mad-Eye and Kingsley took the spots next to each other, leaving her with no choice but to take the seat on the other side. She sat down next to the man and looked at him curiously. He had some red scars on his face, and he wore a battered old jumper and cardigan with patches in them.
"Nymphadora, this is Sirius Black." Mad-Eye said gruffly.
"Don't call me Nymphadora." Tonks's hair turned a deep shade of red to match her annoyance.
"Mad-Eye, you think I wouldn't recognize my own little cousin?" Sirius jokingly slapped Mad-Eye on the back. Mad-Eye, who was not fond of this gesture, glared at Sirius before turning away.
"Andromeda and I were pretty close, you know?" Sirius turned his attention back to Tonks. "Both being the family shame, we got along pretty well." He laughed.
Tonks remembered her mother talking about Sirius through the years. She had never once believed Sirius to be guilty.
"I don't remember you much." Tonks confessed with slight embarrassment.
"Well I didn't figure you would! You were only seven when I was sent to Azkaban for thirteen years. Plus, I had stopped coming round about three years previous to that." Sirius smiled slightly.
"So if we aren't supposed to call you Nymphadora, what are we supposed to call you?" The wizard sitting next to her questioned.
Tonks had almost forgotten about him, but she turned her attention to him at the sound of his voice.
"I prefer to go by my surname. Tonks. Call me Tonks." She said simply. "And who are you?"
"Well I think that Nymphadora is a beautiful name." The man said with a big smile.
"Well you and my mother would get along very well. Maybe you should meet her." Tonks laughed.
"Ahh, I remember being very fond of Andromeda, and I believe she was always fond of me too." He laughed at the shock that crossed Tonks's face instantly.
"Yes I believe that of all my friends, you were her favorite Moony." Sirius laughed.
"Moony? What kind of name is that?" Tonks asked.
"A nickname Nymphadora."
Tonks wanted to repeat her usual phrase of 'don't call me Nymphadora,' but the way her name rolled off her lips almost made it sound pretty. Sirius didn't miss the fact that she didn't stop him from using her full name, and he smirked slightly.
"Remus Lupin." He put out his hand, gesturing her to shake it. "But I don't have a preference of what you call me. Remus, Lupin, Moony. Heck, I'm even called professor!"
"You teach at Hogwarts? I don't think I remember you."
"Not anymore." He laughed. "But that story is for another time." He said, his smile lessening slightly.
"Promise?" Tonks said with a wink.
"Promise." He answered, his smile getting bigger again.
Tonks had felt something different around Remus than she had felt in a long time. Through the course of the year, they got really close. She knew that she was going to get closer to him even if it was the last thing she did. She could feel her feelings grow for him throughout the year too, and eventually, she could sense that he was feeling the same way for her. She thought that confessing her feelings for him would make things easier. She was wrong. She thought that one day they were going to be able to tell the story of them. She would tell how when they met, she knew instantly that she would get closer to him, and she felt little sparks inside. People would tell them all the time how lucky they were that they found each other. Boy, was she wrong. He did like her, he admitted that, but then he started avoiding her at all costs. He started taking more dangerous missions just to get away from her.
I used to know my place was a spot next to you
Now I'm searching the room for an empty seat
'cause lately I don't even know what page you're on
It was a quarter to six when Tonks arrived at the Burrow for the meeting. Usually she would have shown up just five minutes before because she knew she could walk in and sit down next to Remus, who always saved the spot next to him. Now, she knew that she had to find an empty spot herself because she didn't know where she stood with him anymore.
Oh, a simple complication
Miscommunications lead to fallout
So many things that I wish you knew
So many walls up, I can't break through
Unlucky for her, she chose a spot, and when Remus finally arrived, the last seat available was across from her. Through the entire meeting she had to force herself to stare ahead at Dumbledore while she could feel Remus's eyes on her. She didn't think that he even looked at Dumbledore for a second. His stare just fell on her. She started to feel really hot, and her face showed it as it turned a bright red.
Finally Dumbledore adjourned the meeting, and she turned to talk to him. There were so many things on her mind that she wanted to tell him right now. She wanted to tell him that he was a daft prick for thinking that he didn't deserve her. She wanted to tell him to tear down his walls he built and let her in, no matter the age difference or his income, and especially not his half-breed status. But, when she turned to talk to him, he was gone.
Next chapter
How'd we end up this way?
See me nervously pulling at my clothes and trying to look busy
And you're doing your best to avoid me
She frantically looked around the room when she saw him. He seemed to be caught in conversation with Mad-Eye, but he also didn't seem to be listening for he was staring right at her still. She caught his stare and started to get nervous, so she began to play with the sleeve of her jacket. Looking down at her sleeve seemed like a much better option than staring back at him. When she looked up again, she noticed that he had moved closer to the door, only to be stopped by Kingsley. Remus was trying his best to avoid Tonks. He did this at every Order meeting, rushed in at the last second and rushed out as fast as he could. However, tonight, the other Order members seemed to have other ideas. After he finally broke away from Kingsley, Arthur instantly stopped him. Tonks couldn't take anymore of this, so she stood up to leave also. When she got closer to the door, she couldn't help but notice the way Arthur and Remus were blocking the door, there was no way around them to get out.
"Bugger." Tonks mumbled under her breath.
Remus must have heard her because he looked at her quickly.
"Erm, excuse me Remus." She said quietly.
He looked at her sternly, clearly disapproving of her inability to morph her features from being stuck in love with him. He took a small step back, and Tonks started to walk past him. Tonks had always hated her clumsy side, but she especially hated it now as she tripped right between Arthur and Remus. Out of instinct, Remus reached out and grabbed her. His hands grabbed her elbows, steadying her, and she held tight to his forearms. Once they realized the position they were in, they quickly let go and mumbled an apology to each other.
"Remus, Nymphadora, perfect, just the two I was looking for." Molly smiled brightly. "Come with me, I need your help."
Tonks looked over at Remus, searching his face to see if he had any idea what Molly needed, but he just stared down at the floor, refusing to look at her even though he wanted to.
"Follow me dears." She said with another smile. Knowing they shouldn't cross Molly, they both followed. Molly led them upstairs to a bedroom. She opened up the door and let them both in before she slammed it shut behind them and locked them in.
"Molly!" Tonks yelled while banging on the door. "Let us out of here."
Remus did nothing but stand there with a bewildered look on his face.
"Not until you two talk. I don't care if you end up together or not, but you two used to be so close of friends, and I can't stand to watch you two avoid each other. Kiss and make up. Now." Molly stated forcefully before walking away.
I'm starting to think one day I'll tell the story of us
How I was losing my mind when I saw you here
But you held your pride like you should have held me
Tonks looked over at Remus, who was still looking at the door in complete shock.
"Well come on now Lupin, we have to try to get out of here."
But, as Tonks suspected, nothing they tried worked. Molly truly would not let that door open up until she was satisfied.
"I will send a patronus down to Arthur telling him to come get us." Remus said, still avoiding looking at Tonks.
Soon a weasel patronus arrived in the room; Arthur's voice echoed out of it, "Are you kidding? Mad-Eye, Kingsley, and I helped set up this situation. Just do as Molly said and she will let you out. Oh, and Tonks, sorry about tripping you downstairs, I couldn't let you get out the door either." And then it disappeared.
Tonks felt enraged about the fact that Arthur had tripped her. Because of him, Remus refused to even look at her now. She would pay him back for that one someday.
Tonks was thinking that the story she would tell wasn't going to be the one she had hoped for. She was thinking she would tell how she was going crazy in that room with Remus who wouldn't look up from the ground. He was holding onto his pride firmly, but she knew that he should be holding her.
Oh I'm scared to see the ending
Why are we pretending this is nothing?
I'd tell you I miss you, but I don't know how
I've never heard silence quite this loud
Tonks was scared of the ending of this scenario. She knew it wasn't going to be the happy scene that Molly wanted it to be. They had been in here for what Tonks guessed had been ten minutes already without a word coming out of either of their mouth. She wanted to tell him that she missed him, but she didn't know how. So, she resigned on opening her mouth just to shut it instantly. The silence was filling the air along with the tension between them.
This is looking like a contest
Of who can act like they care less?
But I liked it better when you were on my side
The battle's in your hands now
But I would lay my armor down
If you'd say you'd rather love then fight
So many things that you wish I knew
But the story of us might be ending soon
"Well Remus, you had better open that damn mouth of yours because I have no wish to die in this room." Tonks said angrily.
Remus slowly lifted his head and looked at her for the first time since they got in the room. He took in her appearance. Her hair was a limp and a mousy brown. He had always wondered what her natural hair looked like, but he had never imagined that he would be the cause of it coming out. He then looked into her eyes. They were grey, and they were glistening with tears. He had noticed that she cried a lot now, far from any expectation he had of her; she had always seemed so tough and unbreakable last year, but he had done it, he had broke her. He noticed the black under her eyes, giving him the impression that she hadn't had a good nights sleep in forever. The lack of sleep, he knew, he also caused. He looked at her cheekbones. She had such strong cheekbones, a Black trait, he knew. But hers were more defined now; he assumed it was due to the weight loss she had experienced making her features more defined. Then he finally rested his eyes upon her lips. How he longed to kiss those lips one time before letting her go for good. He knew he could, she wouldn't stop him, but he knew he couldn't because if he did, he wouldn't be able to stop himself.
He looked back down at the floor, "I don't know what to say to you Nymphadora."
"Tell me the truth." She said firmly, but he could hear the faint shake in her voice, he was on the verge of breaking her again.
"What do you want me to say? Do you want me to say that I love you? Do you want to hear me beg you to love me back? Do you want to hear that I have been absolutely miserable without you? Do you want me to say that I think about kissing you every second that I am with you? Do you want to hear that I hate that I am a bloody werewolf because it is keeping me from the one thing in this world that I want, the one thing that makes me happiest of all? You." He said, his voice rising slightly. "Well, do you?"
"I liked it better when you were on my side Remus. I'm tired of this constant fight that we are going through. I am so tired of fighting with you that I am just tired physically and emotionally. I am tired of crying myself to sleep every night just wishing that you were there with me. I am just tired. But, I will lay down my weapons and stop if you tell me that you would rather love than fight. I know that you don't want to fight anymore, but I'm leaving the decision in your hands." She said, looking down as she spoke, the tears falling down her face now.
Remus looked at her again.
"I just wish that you could understand. There are so many things you don't know about Nymphadora. You don't know about the way society sees people like me, half-breeds, werewolves. You don't understand how your friends would shun you if you got involved with someone like me. You don't understand." He said, exasperated, begging her to understand what he was trying to tell her.
But Remus didn't get a response from her. Instead he felt her lips on his. It was gentle at first; she seemed she was scared that he would push her away, or worse, run away. But Remus didn't run away, he returned the kiss as gently as she was. She soon backed away from him and looked him in the eye.
"I understand how you see yourself, and I understand what it means to be with you, but mostly, I understand that I have never felt the way I do when I am with you. I have never kissed another that felt so perfect on my lips, as if they were meant to be there. I understand that we are perfect for each other Remus." She cried.
"I… Nymphadora, we… I…" but he stopped himself before he got any further. He stared at her wishing her could see right through her and understand why she couldn't let him go.
He put his hand on her cheek and wiped away the tear on her face with his thumb while she leaned into his hand and closed her eyes. She had never felt more comfortable with anyone than she did when he put his hand on her cheek. He put his other hand on her other cheek and forcefully crashed his lips on hers. He kissed her with everything he could. She returned the kiss as fully.
They heard a small click and they knew that the door had unlocked finally. Leave it to Molly to be literal when she said 'kiss and make up.' But neither of them cared about the newly unlocked door, as they were too busy with each other.
Remus could feel the tears from her face falling between their lips; he could taste their saltiness. Tonks knew; she knew that this kiss wasn't Remus's way of making up with her, rather his way of saying what he needed to say. It was his way of saying he was sorry for the way he was about to leave her. She couldn't help but cry as her heart broke the longer they kissed. She finally understood why it was called heartbreak as she felt as if the man she was kissing right now was literally breaking her heart. They finally stopped kissing to catch their breath and leaned their foreheads together, panting slightly.
Remus, still with both his hands on her cheeks, felt a tear run down his own face. He didn't want to do what he was about to do, but he knew he had to.
"I'm sorry Dora." He started.
"I know." She said; the tears were falling down her face fast. He wiped away another tear as he spoke again.
"I took a mission for the Order. I am going to live amongst the werewolves and try to convince them to join our side. It is best that we be separated so you can move on from me." Remus felt Tonks look up and pull away from his hands, pure shock running through her face, but the tears didn't seem to end at his confession. He continued on, looking her straight in the eye, "I just want you to know, that while you are moving on without me, I will never move on from you because I will never be as happy with anyone else as I have been with you. If only I wasn't a werewolf." He nearly whispered the last part, looking away from her at his statement. "I'm sorry." He said, his voice shaky, as he stood up and started to leave when he felt her grab his hand.
"Remus, I promise that I won't move on from you either."
Remus looked down at the ground. A single teardrop fell off of his face and onto the hardwood floor. He squeezed her hand before saying, "I love you."
"I love you too." She practically whispered before he pulled his hand out of hers and walked downstairs to join supper.
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking
Ad I'm dying to know, is it killing you
Like it's killing me
I don't know what to say since a twist of fate
When it all broke down
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now
Tonks wiped her eyes and walked downstairs just a few minutes after Remus. Molly looked at her with hopeful eyes, but those eyes soon fell when she noticed the condition Tonks was in, and Molly walked back into the kitchen, tears in her own eyes. Here they were, Remus was sitting at the table, trying to eat even though his appetite was completely gone, and Nymphadora was standing in the doorway. Each was staring at the other, but they would not speak in this crowded room. They knew that the other was in as much pain as they were in themselves. It was a sad twist of fate for them. Their story looked like it was ending in tragedy now.