Just a random Parody-off-The-Wizard-of-Oz-Ranma fic, inspired by Math class today… about the Pythagorean Theorem.  Oh yeah, this is my first Ranma fic so sorry if they're OOC.

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Ranma and the Pythagorean Theorem Wizard of Oz 

"The Pythagorean theorem deals with the lengths of the sides of a right triangle. It is often written in the form of this equation…" the teacher said, beginning the math class. On the board was the formula: a2 + b2 = c2 Ranma sat with his head propped on hand, paying the least bit of attention, assuming that he'd just copy the notes from Akane later.

In the front of the classroom, the teacher continued, "This theorem states that the sum of the squares of the lengths of the legs of a right triangle ('a' and 'b' in the triangle shown on the board) is equal to the square of the length of the hypotenuse ('c')."

In the back, Ranma yawned.

The teacher put down his chalk unexpectedly. "Okay class, now I have a treat. We're going to watch The Wizard of Oz for further learning into the Pythagorean theorem!"

The class was all confuzzled, but hey, watching a movie was way better then learning more crap about Math.

The film caught Ranma's eye, "Atleast it'll keep me entertained…" Entertained my ass…he fell asleep three minutes into the movie. In class he was asleep, but in his mind, Ranma was in the land of random and spontaneous dreams.

~*~

His head ached like everyone he ever knew had just thwacked him. He blinked a couple of times before he realized that…he wasn't in Kansas anymore…oh wait…let me rephrase that…okay here I go. He blinked a couple of times before he realized that… he wasn't in Nerima anymore.

And that he…was a she…in a blue gingham farm dress.

"What the hell?!" he shouted, looking down at his clothing. "I'm—I'm in different clothes…which means someone…must have…" he slammed his fist into his palm with a pang, "Knocked me out, splashed me with cold water, kidnapped me in school, and dragged me here!" His eyes panned the landscape around him…the scenery was lush and green, with a yellow brick road cutting into the center of all the grass.  "Or not…I know–insert hand slamming on other hand here-…this probably a stupid dream! Now how do I wake up?"

He turned around and saw the Ghost Cat cackling for some stupid reason and had this black dress thing on and a pointy hat and tacky red shoes.

While Ranma did his 'oh shit' pose, a random farmy-looking house suddenly dropped on top of the Ghost Cat.

Ranma dropped his pose and his eyes turned into little dots and an expression that said, "What the hell was that all about?"

Suddenly, his martial arts senses perceived something rustling in the bushes behind him. DUN DUN DUUNNNN!!! Going into a fighting stance, he swiftly turned around and saw…

Munchkins.

No…not munchkins as in those little short dwarf people that are in the Wizard of Oz…

Munchkins…as in those little donut holes you eat that generally come from Dunkin Donuts.

-Insert anime fall here-

The donut holes started to surround Ranma and began to giggle. And since we all know that basically, Ranma hates being laughed at, he shouted, "What's so funny?!"

They giggled again as a purple-pinkish-lighty-colory cat kind of half pranced/half-walked toward Ranma and the hoard of donut holes.

…I swear, people all the way in the Emerald City of Oz heard a blood-curdling scream from the Land of the Munchkins from Ranma…And what he screamed was…

"CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!"

The purple cat suddenly turned into the girl with long purple hair and big eyes in a big puffy dress that we all know as…

"Shampoo?" Ranma asked, sweat drop forming on her head.

"Me no Shampoo!" the girl that was SUPPOSEDLY Shampoo insisted. "Me Glenda!"

"'Glenda?'" Ranma exclaimed.

"You be quiet! Oh…and munchkins want know if you good witch or bad witch."

"Look, Sham—er I mean 'Glenda' I ain't a--"

"Glenda told you be quiet!" 'Glenda' screeched, cupping an ear. "I trying to hear what Munchkin say!"

'Glenda' and the Munchkins gathered in a huddle as they whispered things to each other, no doubt they were talking about Ranma.

Shampoo…er…Glenda's head finally emerged from the group after what felt like an interminable amount of time.

"OK, Munchkin say you kill Wicked Witch of East with house. Now you have get Wicked Witch of East's ugly ruby shoes and wear so you can go to Emerald City to see Pythagorean Theorem Wizard of Oz."

"The what?"

"You be quiet! Anywho...go take shoes so Witch's feet can curl up under house."

"I don't even want to see the Pythagorean guy! And I don't really like those shoes ei—"

"YOU TAKE SHOES OR GLENDA KILL!!!" Glenda shouted, thwapping Ranma in the back of the head and taking out two fluffy pick bon-bori.

Ranma took the shoes, and the Witch's feet curled under the house. He put them on they automatically adjusted to his shoe size.

  "Okay…now, Munchkins want sing to you, and then crown you Queen of Munchkin Land, and then claim you dead even though you not, and then force you to go to Emerald City to see Pythagorean Theorem Wizard of Oz for no reason." Glenda explained.

"Um…"

So the process Shampoo…er…Glenda proceeded with the Munchkins singing retarded songs about lollipops and sleeping and other stupid crap like that. Only it didn't really last long because Ranma kicked them into the air whenever they started singing. And since then, he was dubbed a harmful woman to the Munchkin people, so they didn't want to crown him Queen anymore, but they did proclaim him dead even though he wasn't. So then they just forced her down the yellow brick road, so he would stop harming the Munchkins. Oh yeah and he has to skip down the road since Sha—Glenda claimed that the ruby shoes had the incredible, super power of…

Making people skip automatically.

Whoa that's a long paragraph…o.0.

Oh, and they gave her a basket with food and other stuff needed for the survival of a general human being.

Oh and instead of Toto the black terrier…she had P-Chan the black pig.

So he continued skipping down the yellow brick road until he arrived at a fork. "A fork, eh?" She took P-Chan out of her basket and picked him up, but dropped him back in since P-Chan took a bite on his arm.

"Alright, Ryoga," Ranma said to P-Chan. "If that's the way you want it then—"

"Cute pig" said a voice behind him.

Ranma turned around and saw a boy with a yellow bandana and a large backpack…attached to a wooden stick stuck into the ground.

"RYOGA?" Ranma asked doing that familiar 'oh shit' pose, "What are you doing here?!"

"You know my name…what's yours?" the boy who was supposedly Ryoga protested.

"Ranma…wait…you don't know me?"

"Nope…"

"So you don't want to seek a hateful revenge on me?"

Ranma went up to him and poked his stomach. "Can I see something first?"—He turned Ryoga's head away so he couldn't see what he was doing. Ranma took a tea kettle from out of nowhere and poured it on P-Chan. Nothing happened. Then he splashed boy who was supposedly Ryoga with cold water. Nothing happened. In his mind he thought, "So if the pig's just a pig; and Ryoga's just Ryoga then…" Out loud he said, "THEN HE MUST BE CURED…WHICH MEANS…I MUST BE CURED!!!" His fantasy was destroyed when he looked down, "…Oh yeah."

"So what are you anyway?" Ranma asked, "A scarecrow?"

"No…And I'm just attached to this stick so I can get people's attention so they can help me get to where I'm trying to go."

"Well, where are you trying to go?"

"I dunno…I forgot. I've been stuck here for so long because I don't know if I should take the left side of the fork or the right…"

"Oh…okay…bye."

"NOOOOOOO WAIT!! Where are you going?" the boy who was supposedly Ryoga asked.

"Well, I'm going to see the wizard…" Ranma answered.

"Really? What are you going for?" boy who was supposedly Ryoga questioned.

"No reason."

"Oh…well can I come with you!? THEN I CAN ASK THE WIZARD FOR A SENSE OF DIRECTION!!" boy who was supposedly Ryoga shouted really desperately.

"Well…I guess…as long as you don't try to kill me or blame me for taking Akane or somethin'…" he mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing never mind…"

So Ryoga jumped of his stick thing and walked next to Ranma, who was skipping.

"Why are you skipping?" Ryoga asked all puzzled like.

"It's these damn shoes…I think they instantly make people skip when they try to walk."

"Oh…well okay…"

The two continued down the road in an uncomfortable silence that Ranma suddenly decided to break:

"So what am I supposed to call you?"

"Uh…I dunno…" Ryoga said, "Some people call me 'Scarecrow'…"

Ranma stopped at stared, "No they don't."

"How do you know? You just met me today."

"…" Ranma just didn't bother.

The awkward silence reappeared when suddenly cackling was heard…no it wasn't cackling. It was:

"OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!"

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So that's the first chapter!!! What do you think? Like it? Hate it? Review! Constructive criticism is good too… ^______^