Title: His
Notes: Eve6's Horrorscope CD+ long road trip + X-Men (and serious Scott fantasies)= this
Summary: Scott thinks about his role as leader of the X-Men
It had been bad. Very, very bad. The X-Men had jumped headfirst into Magneto's trap, and now the odds were excellent that Bobby wouldn't live to see morning. All because of him.
Scott sat in the med-lab watching Jean take care of Bobby. It was Scott's responsibility to watch over the team. His responsibility, his duty, to his team. All his, how had that happened?
He had considered it an honor when the Professor chose him. He was capable, responsible, a good tactician. The team had agreed unanimously. Bobby had clapped him on the back and declared him a "Fearless Leader." It had escaped all of their notice, including his, that Scott was eighteen. A mere child by his own standards. So much power, so little experience, so much room for failure. And if he did fail he lost a teammate, a friend, a sibling.
Scott had learned over the years not to question his judgments. He didn't now. Now he questioned how, why, he had power over other people's lives. Why was his life worth more than the lives of his team? Was it because the Professor deemed it so? Because some higher power deemed him by far the coolest X-Man, too cool to die? Scott knew it was unfair. He didn't want to be a god, especially if people he loved had to die for his exhalted status.
"You hear that?" He demanded shaking his fist at the med-lab ceiling, "I don't want it! Take it back!"
Take it back. Take back the responsibility and the power. Then he would stand helpless as the X-Men fell. He would follow or fend for himself. Would the X-Men, could the X-Men, exist without Scott Summers?
It was a possibility he was unwilling to risk, a world without the X-Men. They were his to protect, and his to wield. Scott knew he could handle the post, win or lose. Pressure, responsibility, they too were his. And while some days he loathed putting on the leather uniform of the X-Men, he would do it gladly to protect his team, his family. It's okay everyone, Cyclops is on the job.
And, he reflected, the whole team had their unique burdens to bear. Jean, who was constantly torn between being doctor and friend. Logan, who was expected to be a one-man army, no matter what the cost. Storm, who was both mother and avenger of the X-Men. The others, fighting for a dream that sometimes seemed impossible.
He knew he wasn't the only person who was feeling guilty and scared for Bobby. It was his job right now to make the team understand that they weren't alone, and that they were his.
Notes: Eve6's Horrorscope CD+ long road trip + X-Men (and serious Scott fantasies)= this
Summary: Scott thinks about his role as leader of the X-Men
It had been bad. Very, very bad. The X-Men had jumped headfirst into Magneto's trap, and now the odds were excellent that Bobby wouldn't live to see morning. All because of him.
Scott sat in the med-lab watching Jean take care of Bobby. It was Scott's responsibility to watch over the team. His responsibility, his duty, to his team. All his, how had that happened?
He had considered it an honor when the Professor chose him. He was capable, responsible, a good tactician. The team had agreed unanimously. Bobby had clapped him on the back and declared him a "Fearless Leader." It had escaped all of their notice, including his, that Scott was eighteen. A mere child by his own standards. So much power, so little experience, so much room for failure. And if he did fail he lost a teammate, a friend, a sibling.
Scott had learned over the years not to question his judgments. He didn't now. Now he questioned how, why, he had power over other people's lives. Why was his life worth more than the lives of his team? Was it because the Professor deemed it so? Because some higher power deemed him by far the coolest X-Man, too cool to die? Scott knew it was unfair. He didn't want to be a god, especially if people he loved had to die for his exhalted status.
"You hear that?" He demanded shaking his fist at the med-lab ceiling, "I don't want it! Take it back!"
Take it back. Take back the responsibility and the power. Then he would stand helpless as the X-Men fell. He would follow or fend for himself. Would the X-Men, could the X-Men, exist without Scott Summers?
It was a possibility he was unwilling to risk, a world without the X-Men. They were his to protect, and his to wield. Scott knew he could handle the post, win or lose. Pressure, responsibility, they too were his. And while some days he loathed putting on the leather uniform of the X-Men, he would do it gladly to protect his team, his family. It's okay everyone, Cyclops is on the job.
And, he reflected, the whole team had their unique burdens to bear. Jean, who was constantly torn between being doctor and friend. Logan, who was expected to be a one-man army, no matter what the cost. Storm, who was both mother and avenger of the X-Men. The others, fighting for a dream that sometimes seemed impossible.
He knew he wasn't the only person who was feeling guilty and scared for Bobby. It was his job right now to make the team understand that they weren't alone, and that they were his.