Dean skipped into the bunker. There, Cas was eating a burger. Not just eating, he was savoring. Castiel was taking small bites out of the succulent dead cow. Dean watched the burger juice run down his stubble. A bit of lettuce and tomato got in his eyebrows.
"Hello Dean." The angel whispered like some cheap hooker.
Dean knew he was just tempting him with those sesame seeds. Dean knew his secret agenda. Castiel wanted his fatty and unhealthy hotdog. With mustard and sauerkraut. Just listening to Dean say this out loud made Cas retreat and blush like an anime schoolgirl.
"Hey baby, I'll take some chicken wings to go." Dean yelled way too loudly.
Castiel then was so turned on he moaned.
"Bbbwaaaaaaahhhhh! DEAN I NEED YOUR FIVE DOLLAR FOOT LONG!" he breathily screamed.
Then Dean obliged and took out the Russian missile, and lodged it into the two pale moons. 3...2...1...Impact. Dean shoved it up there too fast and the butt exploded.
"HHHHnnnnnggg!" Dean took the burger out of the angels' hands and ate the rest. But now it was melted because of the fantastic orgy explosion.
THen out of nowhere Snape descended from the heavens. He then vomited and went back into the heavens.
Dean learned a lot from that day in the bunker. He learned that friends matter, and out there, somewhere, there is always hope.
Dean wept.