A/N: I had this sitting in my document manager so, since we can't upload anything at the moment, I polished and proofread, and it's something new to read. This takes place within the timeline of Choices, when Maggie is still an infant. As always, they belong to Dick Wolf, but Maggie is mine :-) Enjoy!
The phone rang and rang. Just when she was on the verge of deciding he wasn't home, which left her with a vague sense of unease, the ringing stopped. "Hello?"
His voice was thick with sleep and she felt guilty, knowing how little he really slept, but she was at a loss. She had no idea why she had called him, except that every time something was bothering her, she turned to her partner. Somehow, he had a gift for always making her feel better.
He frowned when the first thing he heard on the other end was a screaming baby. It took a moment for the fog to clear from his brain. "Eames?"
"Bobby..." She stopped to gather herself together. If she let her frustration take over, he'd never understand a word she said. Here it was two o'clock Monday morning and she'd gotten maybe two hour's sleep since Friday night. She didn't know if the baby was teething or what, but she had spent the last two nights fussing, and Eames had spent them trying to keep her settled so she wouldn't wake Ricky. When they'd seen Bobby Saturday afternoon, the baby seemed happy and content. But not Saturday night after they returned home. She was fussy, though, not screaming her little head off. Earlier that day she had been restless, even at her dad's, but not uncontrollably so. After talking to Bobby tonight, she had gotten ready for bed...and then Maggie started screaming. Two hours later, she had not settled at all, and Ricky was furious. She was down in the living room and he had just gone back to bed when she decided to call Bobby. She didn't know what else to do, and when she didn't know what to do, she called her partner.
The first thought that ran through his mind was that something was wrong, with his second thought--that Ricky had done something--following closely on its heels. His mind cleared quickly. "What's wrong?"
"I don't know! I can't get her to settle down."
"So you called me?"
"I don't know what to do."
"Where are you?"
"At home."
"Is Ricky there?"
"Yes. He's furious that she woke him up."
He hesitated. "I don't know what I can do, Eames. I'm in Manhattan."
"I'm sorry, Bobby. I don't know why I called you. I just...she's been crying for two hours and I have no idea what's wrong."
He was torn. He wanted to help her, but if he showed up at her house in the middle of the night, Waters would really lose it. Then he would take it out on her, if he didn't shoot him first. "Did you try taking her for a car ride?"
"Twice." He heard a noise in the background beyond the baby's cries. "Hold on."
The last thing she needed was more of Ricky and his attitude. She looked toward the stairs, where he glared at her. "I need to be at work at seven, Alex. Can't you shut her up?"
"I'm trying."
"You never should have had her, dammit. Just shut her up so I can get some sleep! Who the hell are you talking to at this hour? Wait..it's Goren, isn't it?"
"Well, you're not any help."
"I didn't want her in the first place. I told you that. She's your responsibility. Now shut her up!"
"Just go back to bed."
"I'd love to!"
He stormed back up the stairs and she bounced the screaming baby as she brought the phone back to her ear. "Sorry about that, Bobby."
"What did he say?"
"He's just mad because she woke him up."
He felt his anger flare, accompanied by a familiar feeling of jealousy that he was not the one there to deal with the crying baby, to help Eames...to love her...He quickly fought it down. "I really don't know what I can do, Eames, but go on over to your father's and I'll meet you there."
"Are you sure? I just needed to talk to you..."
"I'm positive. Go on."
She was quiet for a moment. "Thank you, Bobby."
"I'll see you soon."
He hung up the phone and got up. Showering quickly, he pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He grabbed a suit from the closet and headed out to meet her at her dad's.
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She lived a lot closer than he did, but he got there a few minutes before her. Part of him hoped she'd stayed at her house a little longer just to irritate Waters, but he knew she didn't think that way. It irritated him that he did, but...he pushed aside his angry thoughts, knowing they would only serve to get him worked up, and that would get him nowhere. He got out of the car when she pulled into the driveway. He could hear the screaming baby before he even opened the door. Leaning over to take her from her carseat, he looked toward the driver's seat. Eames was all upset, too, and he wondered if it was just the crying baby that was responsible. He wanted desperately to pull her into his arms and chase away all her pain and upset, to comfort her and love her...but that wasn't his place. She was married...the words haunted him. Pulling the baby against his chest to protect her from the bitter cold of the January night, he followed his partner to the front door. Still, Maggie screamed.
Once inside, Eames took off her coat and took Maggie from him so he could shrug off his. He took the baby back in his arms, cradling her and softly saying, "Hey, hey, now. What's all the fuss about?"
The hall lights came on. "Alex?"
"I'm sorry, Dad."
He came into the living room, a worried frown on his face. The frown eased when he saw Goren there with the baby. He was surprised, but at the same time, he wasn't. "Hello, Bobby."
"Hi, Mr. Eames. Sorry we woke you."
"It's no problem. What's wrong with Maggie?"
Eames answered, "I have no idea. Bobby came over to see if he could settle her down. He met us here because you don't mind having him around and Ricky does. I was on the verge of coming over anyway because Ricky was really getting mad. She's been like this since midnight. I've tried everything."
Goren had focused his attention on the baby, bouncing her and softly talking to her. John watched the big cop cradle the little girl, patiently muttering to her as he paced the living room floor. And she responded to his gentle voice. Her crying slowly abated until she was just sobbing and drawing stuttering breaths from crying so hard for so long. Soon, even those had quieted and she lay in his arms, looking up at him. He smiled at her. "That's better now." He softly kissed her forehead. "How's my little girl?"
Eames just watched them. Maggie smiled and reached her hand toward his face. He kissed her fingers and she giggled softly. His girl. That was no exaggeration. Maggie responded to him like she did to no one else. "Three hours," she muttered. "Three hours she screamed, and you quiet her in ten minutes."
He gently poked Maggie's belly and she giggled again, holding both arms up toward his face. He shifted her onto his shoulder where she yawned, reaching up to bury her hand in his hair, and snuggled into the crook of his neck with a sigh. He walked over to Eames and tipped his head to the left to catch her eyes. "Go to bed, Eames. I'll take care of her."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Go on. I've already gotten some sleep."
"You'll need to go home and get ready for work in the morning..."
"No. I already showered and I have a suit in the car." She should have guessed. "We'll be fine."
He leaned down so she could kiss Maggie and then she kissed his cheek, resting her hand on his other cheek. "Thank you."
He just smiled. She kissed her father and headed down the hall to the bedroom she shared with Maggie when they stayed there. John looked at Goren. "It's three o'clock in the morning."
"Yes, sir. It is."
"And you came out in this cold, in the middle of the night...why?"
He was honestly curious. He wanted to know what was going on in Goren's head. Goren shrugged. "They needed me. She needed me. I promised her I would always be there for her."
"So you came all the way out here from Manhattan because Alex asked you to?"
"No. She never asked. That was my idea. I wasn't doing anything, anyway."
"Nothing but sleeping, right?"
Goren smiled. "I don't need much sleep."
John stepped to his side to look at Maggie's face. "Almost asleep and totally content." He laid a hand on Goren's shoulder. "Good night, Bobby."
"Good night, Mr. Eames."
He continued to walk around the living room, gently rubbing the baby's back and humming to her until he was certain she was asleep. Then he laid down on the couch and eventually went back to sleep himself.
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It was still dark when her alarm went off. She got up, showered and got dressed for work. She stopped in the living room, watching her daughter sleeping soundly on her partner's chest, his arm wrapped protectively around her. She found herself filled with a longing for that arm to be wrapped around her... She sighed, chasing away the feeling. She went out to his car and brought in his suit, draping it over the back of a chair.
Walking to the couch, she watched them sleep for a few minutes longer before she leaned over to wake him. Instead of calling his name, though, she gave in to a sudden impulse and softly kissed his lips. Unconsciously, he began to respond to the kiss, until he woke up enough to realize what was going on. Then he withdrew, albeit with difficulty. She's married, Goren...he chastised himself, angrily.
"It's time to get up," she said softly. "Your suit is on the back of the chair over there."
"Thanks," he said, kissing Maggie's head as her mother lifted her from his chest. Her hand brushed against his chest and he fought down another surge of emotions he hated to deal with. He couldn't stop himself from watching her carry the baby from the room. Then he groaned quietly and sat up. He rubbed his face. Why had she done that? She knew how he felt. But what a way to wake up...he could get used to that...but...no...he couldn't...
He got to his feet, still groggy, and lifted his suit from the chair, heading to the bathroom. She met him as he came out, taking his folded clothes from his hand. He watched her take them to her room, waiting for her to come back. "Is Maggie still sleeping?"
"Yes. She didn't sleep very well all weekend."
"Is she getting sick?"
They headed down the hall toward the kitchen. "I don't think so...It seems to me she just wanted you."
He frowned. "Really?"
She looked up at him. "Really."
His best girl, the one female who always seemed to want him around, was eight months old. He watched Eames as she pulled two coffee cups from the cabinet and poured coffee into them. He took a carton of milk from the refrigerator as she handed him a cup. Adding milk to his coffee, he poured a little into hers and put the milk back while she added her sugar. He sat at the table, waiting for her. She sat beside him. "Tired?" he asked.
"Exhausted."
"I-I wish things were...different...for you." For us...
She looked at him, met his eyes...and in the dark depths of his eyes, she could read his soul. What she saw disturbed her...not because of the love and honest concern she saw there, but because of the pain that accompanied them, pain she was responsible for. She looked into her coffee. "I'm sorry, Bobby."
Sorry? What could she possibly have to be sorry for? He laid a finger under her chin and guided her face back toward his. "What are you sorry for?"
"A lot of things. Calling you out in the middle of the night when I had no right to do that..."
"Whether you did or not is my call. I told you I'll always be there for you."
"And someday when you get married, what then?"
He laughed bitterly. "Married? No, Eames. That's not likely to happen."
"Bobby..."
"We're gonna be late. Let's go."
He finished his coffee and got up, walking to the sink to set his cup into it. Turning, he nearly ran her over. She spread her hands over his chest. "Don't say that."
"Why not? I'm not afraid of the truth, Eames."
She looked at her hands, spread on his broad chest on either side of his tie. Then she looked up at him. He felt drawn to her, but he resisted. She was not his to hold, not his to love... He caught his breath quietly when one hand moved, up the front of his shirt toward his face, where it came to rest against his cheek. "What are you doing to me, Eames?"
"I don't know. Tell me."
He tipped his face closer. "Why...why did you...kiss me...like that?"
"I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry."
"But you did. Why?"
"It was impulsive. I was so grateful to you for coming out last night. I wanted to say thank you."
"So you...get me all worked up, knowing there's nothing I can do about it?"
Knowing he wouldn't, but still hoping he would..."That wasn't my intention. If you didn't like it..."
"But I did like it...and that's the point. I liked it too much. That's what's not fair. You know how I feel." He moved closer. "You're married. Regardless of what it means to you, it does mean something to me. I-I do love you. I can't help that...and I can't do a damn thing about it. Please...don't torture me any more than I already am. I'll see you in the squad room."
He pulled away, grabbing his suit coat and overcoat on the way to the door. She watched him open the door and pull it closed. He never looked back. His car started and she heard him back out of the driveway. And he was gone.