Fading Sun
I ran and ran and ran, following the trail of my enemy. It had been ten long, terrible years since I had left Bella. After all this time, all this waiting, I just couldn't handle the pain any longer. I had gone to Bella's house, hoping that I could find something there to lead me to her. I knew she would have at least left for college. She wouldn't still be in Forks. I arrived back in Forks to find many surprising discoveries waiting for me. Bella's house, where some of my favorite memories had been, was burned to the ground. I was beyond shocked. I had run immediately to the cemetery to check. Charlie's head stone wasn't hard to find, but Bella's wasn't there. My senses were sent into overdrive when I picked up her live, human scent at the gates to the graveyard. She wasn't dead. The trail was maybe a day old.
I followed the scent out to the Quileute lands. I couldn't cross the line, but I was furious by the too familiar scent of werewolves on every corner of the perimeter. I went to the far side of the reservation and was even more surprised to find Bella's scent trailing away. It was feint, and covered with the scent of one of the wolves. Worry and fury raged in me and I bolted down the trail. I wasn't sure what I would find, but I knew I would find Bella. Why had she been around the wolves? Had they captured her? Had she discovered their secret? Were they going to dispose of her? My mind was raging with possibilities I might find at the end of this path.
Amazingly the trail ran on for miles upon miles. It took me three days until the scent got stronger. I never stopped tracking, and they never stopped moving. The wolf was carrying her then. I followed the reeking odor all the way down to central Texas. Why had they come down this far? The curiosity was burning inside me, but the trail was strong now. They had stopped, and I was getting closer. I jumped over feces and ran over hills, covered in small cactus and trees. This was far from any civilization. My rampage wouldn't be noticed by any unwanted eyes. I began to catch more scents in the air. More wolves. A snarl broke through my teeth. I could also smell something darkly familiar, something I had hoped never to smell again. Bella's blood. It was only a slight twinge on the breeze, but it was enough for me to sense it.
I reached a gated fence and stopped in a patch of trees. There was an old country house with a wrap around porch elevated off of the ground. My fury spiked as I saw a familiar face walk out the front door and start down the porch steps. He stopped, catching my scent on the breeze and looked right at me. A growl rumbled from deep in my chest and bared my teeth. This was all it took to send him over the edge.
Jacob's body shook and he exploded into his wolf self. I launched at him and he at me. We collided with a loud crash and were sent flying on opposite directions. I landed on my feet and spun around. Jacob was struggling to stand, I had shattered his front shoulder and a few ribs. I approached him slowly, letting my anger consume me. He should suffer just that much longer. I kicked him over a few feet, busting a few more ribs. He was breathing hard and couldn't get up fast enough. He would have been a worthy opponent had he not been caught by surprise. I reached his struggling form, half risen, and shoved him down with my foot. My absolute fury and anger was boiling over the edge. I pressed down on his throat, letting him suffer a slow death. Whatever he had done to Bella would be avenged shortly.
Only one sound broke through to me. I heard a soft scream of terror, one that immediately sent my mind back to the dance studio in Phoenix. I released my grip on Jacob the slightest bit and turned my head to the house. There, on the porch, staring in absolute shock, was my Bella. Her long brown hair was flowing in the light breeze, wafting her intoxicating, fiery scent burning in my throat. Her beautiful, melted chocolate eyes, were wet and horrified by what they saw. She was obviously older, though not changed by much. Her face was... tired almost and her body, though still beautiful and alluring, was different. She was different, but she was Bella.
I released Jacob and dashed across the yard to her, grabbing her gently in my arms and carefully, but passionately pressing my lips to hers. Her scent, her soft skin, everything was well and familiar. Everything around me faded away. It was just Bella and I, together again. But something was wrong. She wasn't kissing me back. I pulled my face from hers. Her eyes were absolutely stunned. Then they lit up with anger. She struggled in my arms, trying to push me away. I held her tighter and brushed my fingers through her luscious hair.
"Bella love." I said. "It's me. I'm here. I'm going to take you away from here. Don't worry." She continued to struggle and tore her eyes away from me.
"Edward," My name on her lips was so perfect. "let me go. I'm not leaving. I live here." I released her then. I didn't understand.
Then I noticed a presence near us. I turned and saw a sight that sent everything tumbling into perspective. A little girl with the exact same familiar eyes stood staring, her eyes flickering from Bella to me. Another child stepped out from the door behind her. He was the spitting image of his father, though he had the exact same chocolate eyes that I had been haunted by for ten years. He was radiating heat and his face looked red with a fever.
"Momma," The girl said pointing to me. "who is he?" She was terrified. Her mind kept playing the scene of me kissing her mother over and over, not able to make sense of it.
Her brother stepped in front of her and looked at me with utmost hate. Before I could even search his mind for his intension's he exploded into a small wolf.
His paw were too big and he was half the size of Jacob. He growled angrily and stepped closer to me. My instincts screamed for me to attack, but I couldn't bring myself to harm Bella's child. I backed away slowly. Only turning my attention away to see Jacob, fully healed and walking alongside his son. I held up my hands in retreat and continued to back away.
The boy came and lunged at me. I dodged him and ran across the yard. Jacob grabbed my arm and I cringed at the sound of tearing metal. The pain was terrible.
"Stop! Stop stop stop!!!" Bella was screaming as loud as she could. Jacob froze, my half embodied arm in his jaws. I looked back at Bella, tears streaming down her face. She still cared for me.
"Let him go. Please. Just let him go."
Jacob growled and dropped my arm to the ground. It started to fuse back to my torso and I stood to my feet. Jacob was standing on Bella's right, her daughter in her arms, and the boy on her left. The picture was ripping my dead heart to shreds. She had moved on. Just as I had intended. I scanned the sight before me and studied every detail. The look of fear on the little girl's face, the thoughts raging from the combined mind of Jacob and the boy. Bella's worried face and the way she cradled her daughter to her protectively. Then I saw the delicate band wrapped around Bella's finger.
I wished for tears. I wished I could pass out. I wished for some way to escape this reality. I fell to my knees and sat like a miserable lump. I couldn't even bring myself to sob. I just sat and tried to take it all in. I wrenched my eyes open. My hands were glinting brightly in the Texas sun. Then I saw two tiny feet. I looked up and was shocked to see the little girl standing face to face with me. I hadn't noticed her approach and bolted back into the shade of the nearby trees. Her footfalls had been as silent as my own. I stared back at the little thing. She wasn't scared, but worried, like her mother. She reached for me and took a step forward. I stepped back and she stopped.
"It's ok." She smiled back at me. "Daddy and Emmer won't hurt you. They have to listen to Momma or else they get in trouble. She held her hand up, expecting me to take it.
I looked up at Bella. She nodded and half smiled back. The little girl ran up to me and took the tips of my fingers in her little hand, leading me back into the light towards her family. Her little hand was blazing next to my cold skin, but she didn't seem to notice. She stopped a few feet way from the group and let go of my hand to stand next to Bella.
"I'm sorry." I began. "I thought... and you were... You married a were wolf?" That was all it took. Both Jacob and the boy started laughing awkwardly through their muzzles. Bella smiled and giggled, nodding.
"Come on. Let's talk inside, there's a lot that I have to tell you." She turned and headed up the stairs of the porch. The little girl dashed up the stairs and I followed reluctantly.
I wanted to know everything, but at the same time I just wanted to escape. I could feel the anger flowing through Jacob and listened into his personal thoughts.
Get inside bloodsucker. If you do anything to any of them I will personally see to it that you burn right here. He brushed the ground under his foot and growled lightly. I nodded.
Don't think I won't help him with it ether. But it is cool to actually see a vampire in real life. Emmer grinned and ran inside the house, being sure to shove me off balance as he went by.
Jacob stayed behind me like an executioner leading his prisoner to the gallows. It felt that way to me for sure. The doors were huge and the inside of the house was very open with large pathways and rooms. It was obviously made to accommodate the wolves. Bella was in another room getting some clothes, probably for Jacob. The little girl was sitting in the living room on a long black couch. The entire house was decorated with dark colors, strongly opposing my family's liking to white walls. The girl patted the seat beside her and I came to sit next to the strange little thing.
"So what's your name? Mine's Allie. Momma always told me bedtime stories about vampires, but they weren't scary like the ones on TV. She is a really good story teller. She told me stories about how a girl fell in love with a handsome vampire. That's my favorite story. You remind me of the vampire in the story. You have the same 'amazingly beautiful, sparkling skin and perfectly messy bronze hair.' " She stopped to think. She was like a whirlwind of words, never stopping to take a breathe. Her words touched me though. Bella still remembered me. She still thought of me as a fairytale instead of a monster. I chuckled a little. Then a thought occurred to me.
"What are you and your brother's names again?"
"Allie and Emmer." I looked up to see Bella leaning on the door frame. "You know, Emmett and Jasper. Alice and Rosalie. Just mushed together." She walked over to sit in the too big lounge chair across from me. She smiled and seemed calm. I immediately felt terribly for attacking Jacob and endangering her family. Bella must have noticed the look of regret in my eyes.
"It's ok Edward. You didn't do any harm. You were just..." She stopped to think. "What were you doing?" I knew the truth had to come out then. There was no way, nor reason, to hide it from her. Jacob walked into the room then with his son. They were just as interested to know what brought me here in the first place, especially Jacob. Apparently today had been the second time his son had made the change. My presence following them from Forks had started his reaction. He hated me for doing this to his son, though his son showed no aversion to his newfound 'ability'. I looked up at Bella, still so young and beautiful.
"Went to Forks to see if you had moved on." Her face was still. I had expected her to wonder or be shocked, but she surprised me, as always. "I saw the house and didn't know what happened. I went to the cemetery just to see if..." I couldn't finish that line. It was too painful to even think that she had died, but it was far worse to utter it aloud. "That's where I caught your scent. I followed it to the border line and searched. I found it to continue on the other side of the reservation and followed it here. The whole way I could smell him." I glanced at Jacob. His eyes narrowed. "I thought that perhaps my family's scent had been on you. I thought the wolves might be holding a grudge. I thought they had brought you here to kill you, or something of the sort. I never expected..." I stopped and let my head hang. My confession had gotten Jacob into a frenzy of anger. He was struggling to control himself, but managing.
"Edward." Bella said. Her voice was so sweet and laced with love. "I know you wouldn't have done anything had you known. Don't blame yourself." I didn't move. I couldn't bring myself to speak or look at her. I had tried to kill her husband, though my guilt wasn't deep for Jacob. I could have killed her son. I tightened my fists, my knuckles showing white.
Then I felt a warm touch on one of my fists. It was not hot like the girl's touch, just warm. I looked up to see Bella's absolutely astonishing, chocolate, brown eyes only inches from mine. She sat next to me and patted the back of my hand. It immediately relaxed and I felt at peace. I nodded and gave a halfhearted smile. Bella smiled back and patted my knee, glancing out the window.
"Come on. Let's go for a walk." she stood and held her hand out to me. I looked around and realized everyone had left. I wasn't used to being so out of the picture. It was dark out already and, now that I was listening, I could hear the children bustling around in what I assumed was their rooms. Bella dragged me out the front door and I began to wonder how long I had been in the house sitting and speaking to all of them.
"I wanted to just talk with you." she said as we edged farther away from the house. I could still hear Jacob's thoughts, but we were out of his hearing range. He was staring out the door down the path we had left on. He was far from happy that Bella wanted to be alone with me and he was going to be as close as she would allow him to be. I was able to look through his eyes and catch a glimpse at the time. It was only 5:36. I hadn't been here long.
"Edward." Bella stopped and I looked around. We were at a little pond. It was hidden by the trees and very peaceful. There were a bunch of trees close to the water that seemed to grow parallel with the pond surface. The thick branches winded and twisted into all shapes and sizes. Bella went to one of the more grotesque trees and sat on one of the low branches. She looked out over the tiny pond and watched the pink tint of the evening sky reflect off of it's ripples. "I come here when I want to be alone. It's kind of like my own version of our meadow back in Forks." She turned to me then and smiled. "I always think of you when I come here." She patted the spot next to her and I joined her on the branch.
"I don't understand." I said. I realized I was very blunt when Bella's eyebrows crinkled together. "What I mean is that I don't understand how you are taking this so well. I saw in Jacob's mind what happened when I left you." she cringed at the memory gripping the bark on the tree tighter. "I don't understand why you aren't mad at me." She let out a sigh and looked up at me.
"It's a long story."
"I'm sure I can keep up." I grinned and she smiled, blushing as she did so. God, how I missed that. I wanted so badly to brush my hand against her warm cheek, but thought against it. She was too easily distracted already.
"When you left I was torn apart. It was like you took part of me with you and left me with a hole in my chest. I needed to find a way to fill the void. To make it go away, even for a little while. That's when I found Jacob." She bit her lip and looked down. She seemed a bit frightened of continuing her story. "See, I found out that if I did risky and dangerous things I would hear your voice. I craved it. So I tried to think of the most non lethal dangerous thing I could do in little old Forks. That's when I found the motorcycles." she paused. My eyes widened, whether it was from the fact that she had had hallucinations of me, or that she had gotten a motorcycle when I had told her to be safe, I wasn't sure.
"I knew Jake was working on fixing his car and brought the bikes to him, hoping he would fix them for me. Of course he was too happy to do something for me. So we started spending time together. He started to try and be more than a friend to me, but part of me still clung to you. I guess I always knew you would come back and I wanted to wait for that day. It was two years later before Jake finally decided to push the boundaries. He took me out on a date and proposed." She sighed and I could tell that this wasn't as happy of a memory for her. Part of me rejoiced in this fact, but part of me cringed knowing that I had ruined her chance at a real relationship. "I said no that time, but for some reason he had his heart set on me. He asked four other times before I finally caved and said yes. I knew I didn't love him like I had loved you, but it was better than being alone." She smiled then and looked out over the lake, the moon's reflection replacing that of the pink sky.
"When I moved out of Charlie's house I decided to only take a few things with me. Clothes, knick knacks, that sort of thing. While I was cleaning out under my bed I found a loose floorboard." She grinned back at me and my heart sung. She had found my letter. She had known all this time the truth behind my leaving her.
"Found a box, with all of the stuff from my birthday, and a letter, inside. I read the letter and knew that you still loved me. It made me happy to know that you only left to protect me. I knew I could go on then. I had a feeling that no matter what, you would end up looking for me. I knew, if you truly loved me, that you would come for me one day. So I left with Jake." She chuckled. "I actually thought he would imprint on someone else before you came. I told him about that and that's why we moved down here to the middle of no where. He didn't want to take a chance at losing me to some superstitious crap. He cares about me more than I deserve."
"No, Bella." I blurted out. "You deserve so much more than what you have been given. Don't think for a second you are worth less than this." She smiled at me and put her hand on top of mine. The heat form her gentle touch was electrifying. I had missed it to no end. Yet, here she was comforting me when I had been the one trying to comfort her in the first place. She sighed and escaped to her own thoughts. I recalled the annoyance of not being able to read her mind and couldn't help the words that flowed form me. "What are you thinking?" She blushed and bit her lip.
"Mostly just trying to get my thoughts back in order. Trying to remember where I left off." It made me feel good, for some odd reason, that I was still able to scramble her thoughts like that.
"The letter." I reminded. I was very interested to hear where this story was going to go next.
"Oh, right." She took in a breath and continued. "We moved out and found this ranch. Jacob wanted to take me someplace warm and sunny, I didn't argue the idea. We were here for about a year when..." She paused. She looked down and I could see tears forming in her eyes. That was all it took to push me over the boundaries. I put my arm around her shoulders comfortingly and she leaned against my side. A sob broke from her chest before she continued. "...when we had our first child. She was so beautiful. I wanted to name her after one of your family, but I couldn't make it obvious to Jake." She looked up at me then. Her eyes were shining. "Her name was Elizabeth Masen Black and she had the most beautiful green eyes." My heart would have burst if it could have. That simple gesture made me feel so happy. Knowing that after the torture I put her through, she forgave me and gave me a gift. Something in her words bothered me.
"Was?" She saw the question I was asking and waited. I could tell she was trying to pull herself together so that she could speak. If only I could see what she was trying to say and not force her to utter it aloud. But being a selfish creature, I would not stop her from trying to tell me of what happened to the child.
"We thought that no vampires would follow us this far, and the wolves would ward them off our trail. Apparently Victoria's vendetta against me followed me no matter where I went. She wanted to kill me to get revenge on you, she didn't mind making me suffer in the process." Her tears were flowing from her eyes, but she continued, eager to finish the story and be done with it. "She sent Laurent to follow us. He had been following me back in Forks and was checking to see if you had all left for good. Victoria insisted that my death would still hurt you, so she told him to follow me. Elizabeth was only months old. She was asleep in the nursery and... Jake was out scouting... He got in the house." She was sobbing openly now and turned her face into my shirt. I wrapped my arms around her and let her cry on me. I knew all too well, from Esme's thoughts, how losing a child could destroy a person's life. I hated myself for leaving Bella to be hurt by my own enemy. He had been my responsibility and my target along with Victoria. I rocked Bella in my arms and her sobs quieted.
"Jake made it back before he could get to me, but it was too late for her. We buried her at the reservation. I went through the motions of my life with Jake just as we had before, but I never felt whole again." She smiled then, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Then Emmer came along. And then Allie. My life started to sew itself together after that. But as usual, my life never seems to stay together. There's always something there to cut at the old scars." She glanced down at her wrist, where Jame's mark still lingered on her skin.
"We went back to Forks to see Charlie last week. It was Allie's first time visiting the Pack and everyone in Forks. We got there late and put the kids over at Sue's place for the night. I wanted to go see Charlie. It was late, but I knew he would only just be getting home from the station. When I got there she was waiting for me." Bella fell silent. Not with fear or sadness, but more to gauge my reaction. I was livid. Just the thought that Victoria had been in Bella's house, waiting to pounce and attack her prey. I pushed my anger aside, reminding myself that Bella was alive next to me. I breathed in her scent as if to assure myself that she was here. It calmed me.
"Victoria had already killed Charlie and was just waiting for me. She attacked and I only escaped because Jake followed me. I don't remember much. I hit my head and blacked out. Leah Clearwater dragged me out and the rest of the Pack took down Victoria easily. I didn't escape without another mark to add to my collection though." Bella placed her hand lightly on her side and my eyes widened. I knew I had smelt her blood when I had first reached the house. Victoria had hurt her. I lightly placed my hand on her side and could feel the bandaging underneath. Bella sighed and smiled at my touch. I wasn't sure what to do about it, so I pulled back, only to be stopped by her hand.
"Don't. It feels good." Her eyes were pleading. I reluctantly placed my cold hand back on her side. She relaxed into my side and I felt great joy knowing I could take some of her pain away. "She didn't do any real damage. Only enough to make me loose some blood and have a scar. I'm starting to get used to looking like Frankenstein's monster." She chuckled a bit and wrapped her arms around one of mine. I had to draw a line here. I couldn't let her get attached to me like this. I couldn't steal her from her family.
I pushed against her lightly, so that she was off of me, and scooted away from her. Her shining eyes were full of pure hurt and sadness. I had to think of something to say.
"Bella. You have a family now. You moved on like I had intended for you to all these years. You can't afford to become attached to me now. I don't want you to hurt when I have to leave again." Bella smile back and put her hand over mine.
"Edward. I have always been attached to you. That bond has never wavered, or broken. I can never stop loving you the way that I did all those years ago. I love Jacob enough to put up with his attitude and junk, but I will never love him like I still love you." She brushed her hand lovingly along my cheek.
"And what about your children. Your own flesh and blood Bella. You won't leave them for me. I won't allow it." I stared intently into her chocolate orbs, almost forcing her to stay. She continued to look at me with nothing but pure love in those shimmering eyes.
"Your right. I wont leave them, but I can't live without you. I love you Edward, and I know you love me too. I can't continue this life with Jacob knowing that you and I were made for each other. It has never been true love for me. Him maybe, but not me. My heart is with you, and I want to keep it that way. Would you really force me to be with someone who I don't desire, someone who I will never be entirely happy with?" Her eyes bore into mine with and intensity that I had never known before. It was different and dark. Sexy.
I mentally kicked myself for the thought. But I could not stop looking into those eyes. I saw in them not just love, but lust. I had to stop this, no matter how much I wanted to encourage it. I stood and began to walk away from her. I was about to flood over with my own lust and I knew if I stayed I would do something I would regret. I was about to break into a run when I felt a light, yet stiff grip on my shoulder.
"Edward Cullen. If walk out on me now..." She couldn't continue. I could feel her arm shaking and the smell of her salty tears. Her breath hitched and I could tell she was fighting to hold back her sobs. In that one moment all of my will power seemed to vanish entirely. The monster that had craved her blood so many times before was gone and all that remained was my pure desire to have her.
I turned back to face her and saw the worry and sorrow in her eyes. It was the final straw that sent me over the edge. I grabbed her in my arms, careful not to hurt her and pressed my lips to hers. She was stunned, but kissed me back and we were together for the first time in what seemed like a century.