Disclaimer: If you recognize the character as a J.E. character, they are hers. The original characters are mine and I take full credit for them. They are part of my imagination.

Spoiler Alert: I could use anything from the 18 books that are out.

WARNING: Best keep a box of tissues handy.

Chapter 1: The Ending of a Dream

Stephanie's POV:

I pulled my latest POS car into the parking lot behind my apartment building. It figures that the only spot open was back by the dumpster. I pulled the key from the ignition and climbed out of the car, making my way inside the building and taking the stairs to my apartment. That's right, the stairs. When I reached my apartment I went in and dropped my bag on the kitchen counter and opened the fridge, grabbing the six pack of beer I continued on through my apartment to the bedroom. I opened the window and climbed out onto the fire escape. I got situated and opened the first of the beers. I tilted my head back and drank thirstily from the can. In a matter of seconds it was gone and I had another one open.

I closed my eyes briefly and thought to myself, 'well….here I am again.'

My name is Stephanie Plum, Aka Cupcake, Aka The Bombshell Bounty Hunter, Aka Babe. I've lived in Trenton, New Jersey and am currently working as a Bond Enforcement Agent for my cousin Vinnie Plum. Up until 6 months ago I was in an on again-off again relationship with a Trenton Police Detective named Joe Morelli. Morelli and I had a history that dated back to the time I was 6 and he was 8, when he led me into his parent's garage and taught me a new game called choo choo. The second run in I had with Morelli was when I was 16 and he was 18. He came into the Tasty Pastry when I was closing up and talked me out of my panties, taking my virginity on the floor behind the counter. Our next meeting took place when he returned to town from his stint in the Navy and I'd jumped the curb and run into him with my dad's Buick. Had I known then how many places he'd spray painted the news of the Tasty Pastry incident, I would have backed up and run over him a second and third time as well. Maybe even a fourth time.

I went through life without the aggravation of seeing Morelli again until 6 months after I'd lost my job as a lingerie buyer for E. E. Martin in Newark. I was desperate and blackmailed my cousin Vinnie into hiring me as a BEA, or Bond Enforcement Agent. Morelli had gone failure to appear and I landed the case. In the end, I hauled Morelli back to jail in the back of a meat truck with three other dead bodies and managed to get the evidence that Morelli was in fact innocent. That was the beginning of 3 years of our on again-off again relationship. That ended 6 months ago when I was chasing down a skip and as Lula and I were dragging the creep to my latest POS car, I saw Joe exit a room at the motel where we were. He turned to the nearly naked form of Terry Gilman and told her he'd call her soon and then gave her a heated kiss.

Lula and I had stopped in our tracks. I stood waiting for Morelli to turn and when he did I gave him a right cross to the nose followed by a knee to the groin. When Morelli looked up to see who had attacked him, the look on his face was full of guilt. I didn't say a word as I turned and grabbed the skip. For once the little creep didn't say a word as I stuffed his 6'5" frame into my little car and got in. I guess he was afraid I'd give him the same treatment Morelli had gotten. We dropped the skip at the station and I dropped Lula off at the bonds office. I asked her to let Connie know I was taking off for a couple days and Lula had nodded and asked if I needed anything. I told her no, that I was good and headed for my apartment where I knew I had a 6 pack of beer I intended going through.

On that occasion I had parked and once entering my apartment, had grabbed the 6 pack and found myself in the same spot I was now sitting in once more. I'd gone through the whole 6 pack sitting here, eventually the tears fell down my cheeks and I let go of the past Morelli and I had shared. I realized we never should have been more than friends. He wanted something from me I couldn't give him. He wanted me to change and be the stay at home wife and mother. I wanted to get married someday, but I didn't want to have to give up what was important to me to do it. I liked being independent. I didn't plan on working for Vinnie forever, but for now I was good with what I did…for the most part. I didn't care too much for rolling in garbage and I hated having to shoot my gun. The lives I took still haunted me at times. But I did love figuring out the mysteries. When I could connect all the pieces and put the puzzle together I felt like I was finally good at something. That's what I didn't want to give up.

So why was I sitting here going through another 6 pack, tears streaming down my face? Well, because today was the end of a dream. See, Morelli wasn't the only man in my life over the past three and a half years. When I first started working at the bonds office and needed some helpful pointers on bringing Morelli in, Connie called another Bounty Hunter and asked him to help me out. From the first time I met him, I felt something. Ricardo Carlos Manoso, Aka Ranger, Aka Batman was a bad ass Ex Ranger and Bounty Hunter. He agreed to work with me to teach me the ropes of the bond enforcement business. Over the years he'd given me support in many forms. He'd given me his help when I needed it, cars, equipment, endless support, a job when I needed it, a place to stay when I needed protection, and on occasions we'd even been lovers. I realized when he walked into my apartment to save his daughter and me, knowing he could be killed, that I was in love with him.

I loved two men, but it was Ranger that I was in love with. Why didn't I break things off with Morelli at that point? Because Ranger didn't want a relationship. He said his life didn't lend itself to relationships and his love came with a condom and not a ring. At that point Ranger and I had spent an incredible night making love to each other. It was my part of paying up in a deal we had made, but I knew it was what I wanted just as much as Ranger did. When we talked after that night, Ranger had told me to repair my relationship with Morelli. He also told me if the time out went too long he'd be back in my bed. Like a coward, I went back to what was familiar instead of fighting for what I wanted. So the dance continued for nearly three years before I caught Morelli cheating. You might ask why that was different from what I was doing with Ranger. Well, Ranger and I never slept together while Morelli and I were together. There was the time during the Vordo curse Bella Morelli put on me when my hormones were out of whack and I couldn't get enough of Ranger. But, Morelli had asked for a break because he couldn't keep up with me so I considered that a time out.

When I surfaced from the night 6 months ago, I decided to do my best to make my dream come true and have a relationship with Ranger. I spent the weekend planning my strategy. On Monday I went to Rangeman where I run searches three days a week, and when Ranger flirted, I flirted back. When Ranger pulled me into the alley I gave back as good as I got. Things got incredibly hot. So when he failed to take me up on any of my offers, I finally decided to bite the bullet and ask him what was going on. So today when I went into work, I asked him if he had a few minutes around 5 to discuss something. He'd agreed and asked where I wanted the conversation to take place. I asked if we could go to the penthouse and he agreed.

When we entered the apartment, Ranger asked if I wanted something to drink. I shook my head and we sat down at the kitchen table facing each other. I folded my hands on the table and fidgeted for a moment till he covered my hands with his and asked, "What do you need Babe?"

I lifted my eyes to meet his and took a deep breath. "I need to know what's going on. You told me once if the time out between Joe and I went on too long, you'd be back in my bed. Six months ago, Joe and I called it quits for good. Yet here we are still dancing around each other and still nothing. It gets pretty hot, but then no follow through. What's going on?"

Ranger pulled my hands to his lips and kissed them before setting them back onto the table. "I do love you Stephanie. You are someone I trust more than anyone else. But I can't do a relationship. I feel like I've been honest with you from the beginning. I haven't taken us any farther because I didn't want you to get hurt Babe. I knew you were in this deeper than I am. I accepted what you were offering up to a point, but I couldn't accept all of you knowing I couldn't offer the same thing in return."

"You don't think what we share already is a relationship?"

"We share a friendship. Nothing more Babe. I can't offer you more than that."

"Why?"

Ranger looked away for several minutes before turning back to me. "I once told you I was a sick individual. You were worried that meant I was physically ill. I never explained it because I didn't want to change how you look at me. I like what I do Babe. I need it to feel alive. I like the risks I take in the life and death struggles and I can't live a mundane existence. I know you would never ask me to change who I am. But I won't put you through endless missions of not knowing if I'll ever return. We're friends. That's all we can ever be. But I do love you."

I looked away for several minutes before turning my gaze back to him. "Then I need you to back off on the kissing. I can't handle that anymore. I'm going to have a hard enough time dealing with the end of my dreams."

Ranger nodded. "I got a call earlier today. I'll be going in the wind for the next few months so that will give you some breathing room. I'll let Tank know what's going on so he can explain it to the guys when they see you with someone new. I want you to have a happy life Babe."

My eyes burned as I struggled with the tears that were threatening to fall. I nodded before saying, "Be safe, and don't get shot."

He smiled a half smile before saying, "Don't go crazy Babe."

We stood and I went into his arms and one last time I kissed him with all my love. Then I turned and quickly left the building before I broke down. I don't recall the drive across town. Only making my way up to my apartment and grabbing the 6 pack before coming out onto my fire escape. My dreams were gone. My heart was breaking.