ALONE FOREVER.
There I was back at that heartbreaking,heart wrenching,stomach turning moment again,
the moment when I lost her,my girl. My Sian,my Sian Powers,the S to my soul. The girl who meant everything to me, everything.
There I stood on the cold winters night, as the strong arms of my sisters boyfriend held me back but still I had to fight, I wasn't just go to stand there and let her slip away, no way was I going to let her go.
But I couldn't escape, I just had to stand there screaming her name as I watched the silver car drive away.
As though someone had stabbed me right through the heart, I felt it burn before plumpting to my stomach, just as I saw the last flash of silver as the car turned the corner.
My girl moving further and further away, I crashed to the floor, screaming her name and clutching Jason's legs as my sister hugged me, still screaming I knew my life was over.
In a flash everything was gone, but still I crouch there alone or so I thought, on an invisible ice cold surface.
Surrounded by darkness, only darkness. In the distance I could see a light, as the image came in to focus, I could see it was a silver car, Sian's mum's car.
I made to run for it but I couldn't move, it was as though something or someone was holding me back. I knew Sian was inside the car but I couldn't reach her.
I began to again, this time her name and only her name,the car started to move away or maybe I was being dragged backwards I didn't care I just wanted to reach the car, but the more I screamed the faster the car moved. Faster and faster, smaller and smaller the car became. Still I screamed as I held out my hand infront of me reaching for the car,screaming and crying in hope for the car to come back, but it didn't. The car only got faster and eventually vanishing as though being swallowed up by the darkness.
Still I screamed her name,as I crouch there with my arm out stretched as though frozen. The only movement was the tears that slowly trickled while my mouth trembled as my calls for her became slower and longer.
I knew I was alone. Alone Forever. As the darkness swallowed it's next victim me.
Suddenly I awoke with one last deafening screech of her name. Realising I was awake, aslo that I was sat out straight shivering with my arm out stretched, crying. Crying for my lover.
Frantically I looked around, in hope that it was just a nightmare and it wasn't real.
I was right it was a nightmare. But it was real.
The surroundings had changed but the tempertuare certainly hadn't as I sat there in the darkened room, my stomach turned vilonelty as the thought of not seeing her beautiful face again took over me. Not being able to allow myself to gaze into her twinkling green eyes again. My heart pounded as though about to rip out of my chest, knowing these thoughts were only facts.
Shaking, slowly I lay back on my frosted bed, waiting only to cry myself back to sleep as I lay in the darkness knowing I was alone.
Alone Forever.