Misdirection
AN: This is basically House being, well...House. Written for LJ.
Summary: House is on the floor.
Rated: T (with mild swearing)
Disclaimer: I do not own House.
BANG!
"What was that noise?" Cameron asked her two co-workers who were equally confused by the loud intrusion on their differential.
Foreman dropped the files he'd been viewing and headed toward the conjoining office to find House staring up at the ceiling, his cane five feet away from him.
"Did you fall?" Cameron, quicker then Foreman or Chase, sat beside him. Her fingers swept across his arms and went to check his neck when House swatted her hand away.
"Don't you know how to do a physical? You go neck, arms and legs."
"I knew your neck was fine. You were blinking with sarcasm when we walked in."
Foreman sighed, "Do you need help or are you fine enough to get your butt up off the floor and help us solve what's killing our patient?"
Swinging his body weight up, the older man grumbled nonsense as he sat up and adjusted his leg into a more comfortable spot.
"So," Blue eyes zeroed in on Foreman, "what do we got?"
Rolling his eyes, Foreman threw his hands up. "Irritable bowel syndrome yet the medications for it aren't working. Blood pressure is normal but her blood count is elevated. We ran different tests to see if it's any type of infection."
House popped a pill from nowhere. "Well? Are you going to keep me in suspense and possibly kill our-"
"Felicity."
"Oh gawd, not the curly haired babe from TV!" House grabbed his chest and clenched his eyes. When all three of his fellowships waited quietly, he dropped the charades and scratched at his head. "Try a MRI and see if she'll consent to a LP test."
All looked like they wanted to argue but held their tongues and went to do his bidding. Suckers.
If it were him in their position, he'd give his boss hell before going to do what was asked.
"What are you doing on the floor? Wait! Let me guess, you've found a new way to not be doing your job and avoiding Cuddy?"
Wilson leaned at the threshold of his office, a playful smirk on his face.
"No. I've found a way to pretend like I've gone into a seizure."
"Why?"
"To keep me from hearing that whiney voice of yours from 'enabling' me to death. I hear it's in demand over in India and your ex-wives houses."
Wilson sighed, "Your cane broke again, didn't it?"
"You think?"