A/N: Okay so this was completely mediocre. I did this out of boredom since the powerlines went out for at least 4 hours. Suckish. I was left alone in the house with nothing but my midget of a laptop. Warning for Boy love. Comments are much appreciated.:) Disclaimer: I do not own kkm.
"And no one really understood."
I thought to myself as my men and I slowly and effortlessly made our way back to Blood Pledge Castle after rescuing Yuri for the umpteenth time this week. It wasn't normal for me to have had traveled alone with only my men accompanying me, but my brother, the hybrid, and even Günter, who was usually fussing over how he should be given the opportunity to heroically (more likely "vainly") save the Maou every once in a while, didn't hesitate to trust me to go alone on this mission. Hopefully they saw me as a mature individual now, and not that childish little lord brat who may one day unintentionally set Shin Makoku on fire because of his tantrums. Or maybe that mature individual really has emerged from my old infamous self. But no one really understood. Not even I did at times.
No one understood why I was always so eager to be by Yuri's side either. Was it because of the blindingly obvious reason that I was over protective of him and didn't trust him and his cheating wimpy ways? That, by cheating on me and ruining our engagement, my pride would be crushed and my highly respected status would drastically plummet to such a low and unspeakable reputation? Or was it because of the more oblivious reason that I cared for Yuri as an individual, and that it would be almost impossible for me to go on living without him as a reason? I knew it was an extremely cliché line that even thinking it was an embarrassing act. It was so cliché that even you could have guessed that it would come up sooner or later for there was no other way to describe it. (Yet another cliché line.) I strongly disagree with the statement I heard from some philosopher that says "What you have lived without for so long, you can live without again" or something like that; whoever said that was a fool. You cannot possibly live without something that had made such an impact in your life. It was like trying to stop thinking. It was logically impossible. But no one took the time to understand.
And most people also questioned my relationship with the wimp. Do I want him for his status? Do I want him because I was forced to? Or…could I possibly have accepted fate's graciousness and fallen in love with Yuri Shibuya?
Could I, Wolfram Von Bielefeld, a respectable, snooty, bratty little prince, possibly give vulnerability for the Maou?
I have asked myself this so many times, not only when my mind was vacant, but also when it was filled with stressful thoughts; even when I was in battle, sometimes, amongst all the bothersome thoughts I have, that uncomfortable question almost always manages to linger. Nostalgia washed over me making me remember two weeks ago, as Yuri was drifting off and I was beside him, his sleeping figure unconsciously wrapped his well-toned arms around my neck and buried his face in my heaving chest as that intriguing question leered it's ugly head out of the darkness of my head and into the center, complete with a spotlight. And finally, after so many uncomfortable nights, Yuri's actions supported my theories and I finally had my answer. Yes, undoubtedly, I loved Yuri Shibuya, the twenty seventh Maou. Sometimes just the smallest gestures from him reassured me that I really did have feelings for him. Though I had my answer, which somehow relieved me, another problem situated itself, grabbing the infinite limelight; could I accept the fact that I love a boy? Moreover, will he ever come to accept my feelings, moreover to love me back as well? It pained me to recall his expression when he found out that by slapping me, it meant automatically making me his fiancé. Was it so taboo in his realm that he was so ashamed of that fact that he even tried to hide it from his family when we went to his world to search for the fourth box?
It was extremely painful for me to see him reject every single act of affection I gave after my conclusion. If he wasn't going to return my feelings, he may at least respect it and let me dwell in happiness as I continue my own passionate and uncontrollable one-sided love affair. But he wouldn't give me that privilege either. Now, being stubborn was one thing that was expected from me, but being patient was somehow unbelievable. Was I really willing to wait for the right time for him to somehow accept my feelings? That was very unlikely, and so was returning them. If I tell him how I feel, I might risk our friendship. Or, on the more bizarre side, it might encourage him to return my feelings. Or if he already had, he hasn't told me yet.
"I must be delusional." I thought to myself as we approached Blood Pledge Castle and I felt the body behind me slouch on my back. An adorable and familiar little face appeared on my shoulder blade.
"Hey, Wolfram, are we here yet?" Yuri asked sleepily, his eyes struggling in deep slumber.
"We're near, lo-…Yuri." I replied, playfully pinching his cheek using my free hand. He smiled at my gesture and continued to sleep with his arms wrapped securely around my torso. His hands were folded tightly across my chest and I grasped them with my free hand. I smiled to myself, overjoyed at the contact. We continued to travel, my fiancé lightly snoring in my ear, which oddly soothes me. His head bobbed up and down on my shoulder as we traveled along the rocky slope up to Blood Pledge Castle, leaving my mind vacant once more. It hurt to think-hope- any further about how Yuri could possibly come to change his feelings towards me as it is uncommon in his world. One thing's for sure though,
"We're home, Yuri." I said with a smile as I softly nudged him. His eyelids fluttered to reveal his sleepy dark eyes, which seemed to brighten up in an instant as he saw that we were approaching the castle, with the others waiting for us.
I won't tell him today.
I climb off my horse and plant my feet firmly on the ground before outstretching my arms to catch Yuri as he jumps off clumsily and excitedly onto the gravel.
Let his thoughts stay unbothered for a while longer; he doesn't have to know right now.
He lousily falls into my arms and for even a moment, I was able to hold him. And he didn't struggle. Happiness washed over me, and that feeling didn't fade even after his arms retracted from me. He catches our precious daughter in his arms as she gracefully jumped into his being. He held her tight, burying his face in her bushy brown hair, listening intently as she declared "Papa, we waited for so long!"
I'm willing to wait.
I walked over to them and put my hand on his shoulder. He looked up at me, his eyes gleaming with joy, relief and gratitude.
Why?
I kneel down beside him as I take Greta in my own arms then hold her hand as the three of us walk back to the rest of them. Unexpectedly, he takes my hand into his own and gently squeezes it. I look up and my emerald eyes meet his onyx ones. He smiled at me and mouthed the words "Thank you. Wolfram"
No one will understand.