Seth held his phone sitting on his bed. Soon Lilian Garcia would be calling. She had asked him to be on her podcast, and was kind enough to give him a heads up on the questions she would ask. Interviews made him nervous. And he knew this one would be more personal.
He has decided to say for the first time publicly he never met his biological father. And how growing up was not easy. There were times in his teenage years it was down right miserable.
Seth loved being from a small town, which is why he always came home. Everyone knew you, knew your family. It was safe. He had a great childhood. But like most small towns there is not much to do. By high school it was sneaking out getting drunk or high. For most their reality was they would never leave this town. They would find jobs get married start a family. But Seth had always wanted more.
From when he first started watching wrestling he knew that is what he wanted. It became his anything, he put his whole self into it. And at times it became his escape. Escape from his parents divorce, his new step dad, growing up. For a few hours none of that mattered. And when he was practicing or training he could shut it all out. He got to become a whole other person. A person with no fear and no worries. A person who was confident.
He walked to his closet and pulled a box down. In it was filled with keepsakes. Things his grandfather gave him, his mother. Everything from stickers of his favorite bands to pictures. He thumbed through it. Since he knew he was doing this interview he felt nostalgic.
He smiled seeing faces of his old friends. Laughed at the clothes and hair style they thought at the time were impressive. He fingers felt the edge of old newspaper, he stopped. Laying the picture back he slowly and carefully took the newspaper clipping out. Seth swallowed hard gently unfolding it. No matter how much time had past it still felt the same. The same it did that morning Seth saw it sitting on his grandfather's kitchen table.
Seth read the still bold black print " fatal stabbing Buffalo youth killed." His eyes read over the article, some of the details he had forgotten. He stopped , "Danielle, (Danny to her friends) Holland was brought to Buffalo's local ER at 2 am Sunday morning. After neighbors called police due to a domestic discrepancy. " Seth rubbed his eyes, "Danny was pronounced dead on arrival after suffering a stab wound to the neck." Seth's eyes settled on a small pixelated black and white photo.
With all that had changed in his life, Danny never did. She would be forever seventeen. And she would be forever one of the most important people he met. She was also one of his greatest heart aches, and regrets. She taught him more lesson in the short time he knew her than most people.
Seth had hardly spoke her name in 15 years. It was like he couldn't explain her or their relationship. And maybe he didn't want to. He offended wished he had video of their time together, so he could rewatch. Even though he had replayed it a million times in his head. But over the years things faded. He forgot the sound of her voice, the smell of her hair.
Life is funny when you are a teenager. All you want is the next day. Everything is about the future. You never think of all the changes coming. How all your plans might not happen. How life can be cruel and unpredictable. That there is a huge world beyond your tiny hometown, that is not as warm and friendly. You never stop to think that life is fragile. That moments pass and you need to stop and take it in, because you will lose it. Things become nothing more than memories, even people.