Chapter 1: Mr. Darcy is Mortified

"Which do you mean?" and turning round he looked for a moment at Elizabeth catching her eye, he withdrew his own and coldly said: "She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me; and I am in no humour to give consequence to young ladies who are slighted by other men. You had better return to your partner and enjoy her smiles, for you are wasting your time with me" – Pride and Prejudice

On hearing this myriad of thoughts passed through Elizabeth's mind, but foremost was curiosity.

She rose and walked towards Mr. Darcy, went past him, turned around and looked squarely into his eyes, and smiled, a mischievous smile. Before a perplexed Darcy could come to an understanding of what was about to happen, he was deep in the trap, with no way out.

Mr. Darcy looked in surprise as Elizabeth addressed him, "We have not been introduced, sir, and I do know it is beyond your fastidious sense of honour, and also veritable dictate of our society too, that a person can't introduce himself to superiors let alone a woman like myself. Yet, since I'm worth not a consequence and I'm one who has already been slighted by almost every man, so it won't constitute a breach in the propriety if I may ask you a question."

Darcy was mortified and was at loss for word, he gathered his thoughts and started speaking, "Miss..." he paused and thought 'Oh what is her name, did I know or remember her name, I should have listened more carefully when her mother was introducing her to me', not finding any in memory he continued "ahem, I'm heartily sorry... ." But he was cut off in middle of his sentence by a curious Elizabeth.

"I'm not asking for apology sir, I am just curious and I have a question. Do you have a scale to measure attractiveness, if it is, where did you get it? What are different categories? Like I'm tolerable but not handsome enough to tempt, so there must be other categories too. I'm very much interested to find out such life-changing social invention."

"Miss I didn't mean, at least let me explain."

"Of course sir, an explanation should definitely follow, but first you must tell me about categories. What about person present here, sorry I should say women since this scale I think is gender specific, is it not? How about Mrs. Long's niece, and Miss Bingley, you can even include my mother she will be pleasantly surprised to be included in the evaluation, no matter what category she gets. There is no need to include Jane she is in the category handsome as you already mentioned. We have deduced two categories now, come, sir, you must say something, there must be more than two categories."

Now Darcy couldn't even form a coherent thought, his palms were sweating and he was cursing the moment he spoke with Bingley, he was cursing Bingley as well for goading him, his decision to come to assembly due to Miss Bingley's insistence to stay back with him at Netherfield, and even Bingley's decision to lease Netherfield at first place.

He knew no amount of apology will dissuade this spirited, lively, witty, stubborn girl with a pair of fine eyes from berating him. 'Fine eyes? Wait! Where did this thought come from?' This gave him courage and he mused 'Well, two can play this game.'

"Indeed you are right Miss, there are five such categories, this scientific scale has been designed by the members of the Secret Society of Social Sciences for both men and women, after coming to consensus, and before you accuse me of lack of women representation, all members of society did consult with women in their family, who in turn discussed with women employee in household, who in turn discussed with women in their respective villages and in cities. So, you see women have proper representation in this scaling."

"One might say, sir, that, men are the ones who are underrepresented, I'm surprised women don't have the franchise but they at least have indirect representation in the decision making of such august Society."

"Fear not for men Miss, since members of that society are best minds among men, they thought themselves capable enough for such a scientific endeavour where men's scaling was concerned."

"Now to answer your question about scale for women, there are five such categories for women, first 'Handsome' here is your sister Jane, second 'Tolerable but handsome enough' no one here, third 'Tolerable but not handsome enough to tempt' most of the women here and I made the gravest mistake to include you there, fourth 'Not tolerable' are young girls here running around with no care, and fifth and last 'Intolerable' Miss Bingley."

Mr. Darcy had the teasing tone all through his speech and then gave a mischievous wink at the intolerable part. He then continued with all solemnity and contrition "I won't grade any old matron or married women even in a jest because that is against my principles, I have committed a great mistake and given the greatest insult, for which I'm heartily ashamed but I'm not a cruel or unfeeling man".

She was moved by his words and she also realized instead of rising to her bait, he played along and he did give some more insult while explaining but teasing glint in his eyes told her he didn't really mean those words. For young girls running around, she too was sometimes exasperated and for Miss Bingley lesser said was better, as her own observation of that lady was similar to Darcy's opinion.

"Where will you keep yourself, sir, in the same scaling for men?"

Mr. Darcy looked at her with deep intensity and feeling and replied "There is the sixth scale for me, 'Intolerable Fool' who almost lost one chance at true happiness'"

Elizabeth was silent, now it was her turn to be at loss for words, she couldn't mistake his meaning.

She blushed and in low voice asked, "You said the way you scaled me was the gravest mistake. Where will you put me now on that scale?"

"There is the sixth scale for you, miss 'Exceptionally handsome and witty'."

She looked into his dark eyes, warm and full of emotion, and gave a true heartfelt smile and said, "Miss Elizabeth Bennet" and curtsied.

Mr. Darcy looked for a moment and then understanding dawned on him and he replied, "Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy, at your service" and bowed to her.

He then asked, "If you are free may I apply for supper set Miss Elizabeth."

"You may sir" and then Elizabeth gave him a teasing smile and said, "You sir belong to the seventh category, 'Intolerably handsome and intelligent.'"