DISCLAIMER: I don't own SpongeBob and all related characters.

SpongeBob the Super Model

"SpongeBob! Get out of my ass!" Squidward screeched. SpongeBob was once again running around the Krusty Krab with Squidward's rear-end covering his face.

"I can't see anything!," cried SpongeBob, "It's too dark in here!"

"You're tearing my anal tract apart!"

"Hold on, let me light a match!" said a not-so-bright SpongeBob.

"Noooo!" cried Squidward, "Please don't SpongeBob! The last thing I need is flames on the inside of my ass!"

SpongeBob lit a small match anyway, and held it up to see the inside of Squidward.

"Wow! There's a Snickers Bar in here Squidward! Can I have it please?" asked SpongeBob.

"Yes! Whatever you want! Just get out of there! I've got to take a dump!" Squidward yelped.

"I can see that." Observed SpongeBob.

Suddenly, SpongeBob felt Mr. Krabs strong claws grasp his waistline and pull him out of Squidward's fleshy bottom. Squidward sighed of relief.

"SpongeBob! Quit playin' fanny bandit and get back to work!" ordered Mr. Krabs.

"Aye Aye! My homo-hating boss!" SpongeBob ran into the kitchen gleefully, Snickers Bar in hand. Squidward held his bottom and ran to the men's room. SpongeBob ate his candy and prepared food for customers while fantasizing about Patrick in Victoria's Secret apparel. Mr. Krabs then burst into the kitchen.

"SpongeBob! I need you to do something for me, but it's goin' to require a lot of estrogen on your part." Announced Mr. Krabs.

Do I finally get to make sweet love to my crustaceous boss? Thought SpongeBob; smiling.

"I know what you're thinking SpongeBob, and the answer is no." said Mr. Krabs, "I can't get it on anymore because I'm old, and every medicine I took made my boner last more than four hours".

"More than four hours?" SpongeBob smiled more.

"Don't push it, boy" Mr. Krabs narrowed his eyes. SpongeBob's smile crept from ear to ear. "Don't rub it in, lad" Mr. Krabs warned SpongeBob again. SpongeBob kept on smiling. "SpongeBob, you rub me the wrong way" Mr. Krabs said. SpongeBob's smile got so big that it didn't even reach the limits of his face anymore.

"Look," said Mr. Krabs, "Me lovely daughter Pearl is going to her senior prom in a week, and I want to surprise her with a new dress, a cheap one though, and that's where you come in you little flaming faggot."

"Huh?"

"SpongeBob, I need you to go with me dress shopping, I need you're advice! I want to get the best, yet cheapest, dress for me darling daughter." Said Mr. Krabs.

"Wow Mr. Krabs! I'd be more than happy to help you!" exclaimed SpongeBob.

"That's the spirit you little fagbaget!" said Mr. Krabs.

TO BE CONTINUED…