"I finally find, you and I collide"

Alternate Return Of Edward (New Moon)

Another Day. Over. Finally.

Every morning I got up and went through the motions: ate, dressed, school, home, cooked, ate, homework. Monotonous. Empty. Just like me without him. I could tell Charlie was worried, but he didn't push me. Guess he was just glad I was still breathing. Funny, it didn't feel like I was breathing. It didn't feel like I was anything, not without him. My love. My life. Edward.

Every day, I went through the motions, but at night I couldn't escape. I missed his cold arms encircling me, keeping me safe. I missed his velvet voice, humming my lullaby, soothing me. I missed him. But I knew... Well, I should have known, that it wouldn't last. He was perfect, and I was… Bella. Ordinary. Plain. Human.

"You don't…want me?"

"No."

One syllable, ringing over and over and over in my head, haunting my dreams, haunting me. But I had to face it. He didn't want me. Why would he? I was me, and he was…Edward. No way was I good enough.

So here I was, sitting in bed, not living, just simply being. Alone. Without him. God, how I longed for my hallucinations, just to hear his voice, his beautiful, perfect voice, just for a minute…

"Bella."

I jumped. When had my hallucinations decided to add the 'on demand' feature? Not that I was complaining. That voice, that gorgeous voice. And yet there was something different about it this time…it wasn't that exquisite fury I had grown used to, but a sort of desperation, and yet at the same time a hesitancy. Weird.

"Bella?"

Huh. It sort of sounded nearby too, like he was in the room, instead of my head…I wish. But still, something in the voice called out to me – it was pain, and I would do anything, anything, to make the pain go away. I sat up in bed, needing to concentrate.

And my heart stopped beating.

In front of me, by the window, stood…Wow, these hallucinations were getting better. It looked exactly like him – tousled bronze hair, flawlessly perfect face. The only glitch was his eyes – they were not the warm, liquid gold that I loved so much, but a deep black, like he hadn't been hunting in a while. But it was still him. Edward. My angel.

And then the angel spoke.

"Bella, I'm sorry, I realise that I made you a promise, and that by being here I'm completely violating that promise, but…I've told you before that my kind are selfish creatures, and it was true. We find it very difficult to ignore things we want, things we crave, things we need…and I need you, Bella. I realise I told you to move on, and I would be utterly to blame if you have. But you need to know…I love you."

I stared at my vision, dazed. My make-believe Edward wasn't usually so talkative - he tended to rebuke me and leave. I found I couldn't imagine such declarations of love at all, simply because I knew that it wasn't true...The memory stung, and i shook myself out of my reverie and back into the present. The way I saw it I had two options.

1) I had died in my sleep (not such a big problem for me - i was sick of just existing) and this was heaven. Unlikely, since I could still hear Charlie snoring in the next room...not exactly my idea of paradise.

2) I wasn't hallucinating.

The fact that that idea actually seemed the most reaonable, most believable, floored me.I sat and listened to his outburst in shock, hearing but not understanding. Edward didn't love me. He told me. I knew it. And yet the voice continued fluently, as though he had planned this speech well in advance, been planning it for months…

"I know you believed me in the forest when I said I didn't, and that will haunt me for the rest of my existence – how could I not want to be with you? You are the only person I have ever, and will ever love, even if you no longer reciprocate those feelings. You, Isabella Marie Swan, are my soulmate, and if you have moved on, then I will spend the rest of eternity alone. I deserve it. But I just needed you to know, that in that time, not a nanosecond will pass where I won't regret ever leaving your side in the first place."

He stopped talking, the speech seemingly over. Which was a good thing, as I chose that precise moment to throw myself across the room and into his arms. Hoping to God that if he was a hallucination, he was some exteremely advanced type that could still hold me and pull me close.

Anyone else would have stumbled, shocked, but not Edward. He caught me reflexively, burying his face in my hair as I buried my face in his neck and inhaled deeply. My god, he smelled intoxicating. Hallucinations didn't have a smell, and it was then that I realised just how poor those ghosts of Edward were. Nothing compared to the real Edward. Nothing.

And he was real. My heart rejoiced.

"Does this mean I'm forgiven?" His voice was full of the love I felt, the love I had longed for for 6 infinite months, and yet there was still hesitancy, like I might suddenly extract myself from his arms and send him packing. As if.

"There's nothing to forgive," I mumbled, planting a kiss on his neck. And every word rang with truth. Edward leaving wasn't wrong; it was just a glitch in our relationship, a twist in our intertwined paths. I saw it now, so clearly, that we couldn't be over, we could never not love one another. It was written in the stars, plain as day – Edward and I would be together. We were soulmates.

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Authors Note: Hey, I just wanted to thank all the reviewers - i really appreciate all the lovely comments, and the criticisms too =] A couple of you guys mentioned how I rushed the whole hallucination thing (which is true :P), so I've tried to improve it - let me know what you think :)