A/N: This is a random one-shot, about Maureen thinking about and coming to terms with being gay. Written on sleep deprivation, not my best stuff, but nonetheless, I hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: Don't own RENT. Did you think I was brilliant enough to aquire the rights to it in the past few hours? Nope, didn't think so.

The girl sat, alone, looking out the window. It was a Saturday evening, a time that a girl of her age should have been out doing something with friends or on a date. But, for some reason, she had declined all invitations for that evening, and had, instead stayed in.

She could have gone to the movies with a large group of her friends, or out to dinner with her boyfriend, or even crashed some college party with her best friend, even though she was way underage.

But every time she had received an invitation, by way of phone or dropped in casual conversation, she had lied, saying that she already had plans for the night. Who with?

"It's a family obligation, I agreed to baby sit for the neighbours, friends are coming in from out of town, and no, you don't know them." A

fter this came the usual whining, "Why can't you go? Couldn't the neighbours get someone else? Bring your friend along I'd love to meet him/her!"

But no.

She had just smiled sadly and walked away, calling over her shoulder that maybe next time she could go.

So now she sat on the cracked leather couch in her living room, braiding a strand of her long brown hair. She continued to try and ignore the weird sensation in the back of her stomach, a feeling that had been making itself known more and more lately. But she continued to ignore it, act as though it wasn't there.

She was a normal sixteen-year-old. She liked parties, disliked school and her parents, and had a steady boyfriend. And that's where things felt wrong. He was really a charming boy, and she'd known him since forever. They were best friends. But she couldn't help thinking that that's all they were, all that they ever were.

She didn't get that tingly feeling when they kissed, there were no fireworks. It was like he was eating her face, like he was trying to prove something. The absence of liking Mark wasn't even all that disturbing. It was what replaced liking him that scared her senseless.

Every time she and Joanne touched – a hug, hands brushing in the hallways at school – she felt a little shock run up her spine. She had the sudden urge to kiss her, to hold her hand, to play with her hair, and all at the most inopportune moments. The middle of science class, or at lunch while Mark was hugging her.

She itched in her skin.

What did this mean? She wasn't gay…was she? There was no denying that without intending to, she had fallen head over heels in love with someone who she wasn't supposed to love – at least not like that. Friendship loving was fine but anything beyond that and poof.

She would die at the hands of her parents. But, she didn't want to hide this part of her, even though she knew it would mean nothing but trouble for her once she admitted to having this deep dark secret. But it wasn't really dark.

It was just a part of her, as simple as the fact that she has brown hair or is five feet seven inches.

She is also gay.

And everyone would have to learn to like it. Or at least tolerate it.

Gay.

It was such a funny word. Three little letters that symbolized so much. Guys with guys, girls with girls, cross dressers, rainbows, it almost seemed like there was an entirely separate lifestyle for some people. But why should her life have to change?

Aside from her dumping Mark and maybe (if she found enough courage) asking Joanne out, her life would stay exactly the same as it had always been. She found that even though she was different than what she had originally thought of herself as, she was no less herself in any way.

She picked up the phone and dialed Mark's number. He answered on the second ring, and immediately sensed that something was wrong. That's why she loved him, but in a brother/sister kind of way not an I-want-to-screw-you type of love.

"What is it?" he asked his tone quiet and reserved. "I want to break up." There. She'd said it, it was done. Now she just had to wait for his reaction.

"It's a girl, am I right?" God! How could he read her so well, especially without even seeing her! "It is. Are you okay with that?"

"As ok as I'll ever be," he replied, resolve in his voice. "Go get her Mo." She hung up the phone and took a deep breath.

The doorbell rang, and she got up to answer it. It was as though some higher power was watching her, anticipating her moves, because Joanne was waiting on her front doorstep. There was a tense moment between the two girls, and then she leaned forward and kissed Joanne on the lips. As they pulled apart, she smiled and said, "I'm gay."

The response?

"I know."

A/N: That's it. What didja think? Reviewers get presents!