Standard Disclaimer Applied
Note: I don't have anything against gay people. So please don't be offended. Supposed to be a one-shot. Warning kinda random.
At least I'm not an idiot like somebody." Lucy shouted from her current position at the bar.
"Yeah and I'm not a weirdo like Lucy." Natsu replied easily.
"The guy that was raised by a dragon says I'm weird."
"You're just jealous that I'm NORMAL!"
"Says the guy that has a talking cat, that eats fire and was raised by a dragon."
By now the entire guild-or whoever was there at the moment-was mesmerized as the two stood up and marched towards each other.
"Hmmm fire food." Lucy exclaimed licking her lips.
"Awww Plue your sooooooo cute." Natsu mimicked happily.
"Fight me Grey!" Lucy yelled holding up her fist.
"AHHHHHHH! My nail broke!"
"I never said that!"
Natsu shot her a look.
"Fine I said it once. Once!"
"Let's go shopping." Natsu exclaimed jumping with excitement.
"Oh crap, Transportation! Get me off this thing!" Lucy screamed falling to ground while one hand clutching her stomach and the other shot to her mouth. "I'm going to need that bucket!"
"Levy, Mira I just got a new boyfriend. Ahhhhhh!"
Lucy smiled walking up to Grey. "We weren't fighting Erza." she proclaimed nervously "Please don't hurt me."
"I need you to go on a mission with me Natsu!"
"I'm gonna go break in Lucy's apartment for no apparent reason."
"Ahh! Natsu get out of my bed, stop reading my book, that's my diary, stop eating my food. GET OUT!"
"Hmmm I'm going to pick the hardest job on the request board."
"I hate walking. I'm going to call the clock guy."
"Happy let's go fishing!"
Happy smiled and shouted aye.
"Happy she was kidding." Piped up Levy.
Only to find the cat crying in the corner about how unfair Lucy was.
Natsu walked up to Levy and grabbed her discarded book. Hell who needed a book when you had these two.
"Natsu go away I'm reading."
"I'm going to bug Lucy even though she is doing something."
"Oh My God let's talk about clothes, books and boys."
"You know Natsu you can join us and maybe we can hear about your girl oops I mean boyfriend."
Natsu stared at Lucy pinning her with his glare.
"I am not gay! Besides at least I don't use sex appeal to get what I want."
"You have sex appeal, since when?"
"Shut up!"
"At least I can use big words."
"Yeah I know a lot of big words like grotesque, statuesque, genocide and infanticide."
"Oh? What's the definition of grotesque?"
"You picked the only word I didn't know the definition." Natsu said looking at the floor
"At least I'm not dense, like you Natsu!"
"Yes you are."
"No you are."
This continued for about ten minutes before Lucy grabbed his ear and dragged him to the bar.
"Oww, Lucy!"
"Who's denser?" She screamed at Grey, Lisanna, Erza and Mirajane.
"Well romantically inclined you both are equally dense." said Mira
"She's right you're both really dense when it comes to that." Erza agreed
"I think so too." Lisanna stated
"I hate to admit it but if that's what you are talking about you both are dumb." Gray proclaimed "But in everything else Lucy is smarter."
Lucy smirked making them squirm and wiggle in their seats. She had an idea and that would prove once and for all that if she was anything she was smart.
"Okay I bet that I can get a boyfriend by the end of the week."
"Psh so can I."
"Fine deal." Lucy exclaimed standing up and putting out her hand "If I start dating before you I win and vice versa."
He grinned grabbing her hand. "You're on."
They watched as he walked out of the guild this wouldn't end well