Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or any of it's characters.

AN: Songfic-ish in a way. I hope it doesn't come out too retarded.

A tall figure stood outside the door of Orihime's apartment, soaking wet from the rain. He raised his hand to knock on the door but pulled back in hesitation. He stepped back and stared at the door for a few seconds and tried listening for any sounds inside. It was night and they were most probably asleep. He slowly pushed his wet hair out of his face and sighed. The sounds of the tap running built up his hopes. He knocked the door slowly.

-

Can somebody save me?
Coz I'm thinking maybe
That you can take me piece by piece
Then you got your reasons
But I didn't need them
And either way I'm on my knees yeah
You knew when I was wrong
You say that I'm deranged
I can see that you're uneasy and it's not gonna change
And no matter how far

Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Either way you're breaking my heart
Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Even when we're falling
Even when we're falling apart

Ichimaru Gin was weak and he knew it. He knew the reason he was weak. He knew that no matter how many years had passed and whatever incidents had happened, he knew that he was still in love with Matsumoto Rangiku. He could never express it freely because he knew what his sub-ordinates would think of him. He knew she loved him back, but to what extent, he didn't know. Gin saw the pain in her eyes the day he left for Hueco Mundo. He knew he had betrayed her and yet, he couldn't stop thinking about her.

Ichimaru Gin's 'happy face' was just a façade and Rangiku knew it. She knew that he could always be himself when he was with her. She knew his true feelings when they were alone. Gin was always open with Rangiku but he knew he had limits. He couldn't tell her about Aizen and his plans no matter how much he ached to do it. Ichimaru Gin had a heart, but it was only for Rangiku.

You say that you're leavin
Say that you don't need him
And I'll I do is give and you just take
I guess that I knew it
I can't make it through it
But I'm gonna try this anyway

You knew when I was wrong
You knew that I'm deranged
I can see that you're uneasy and it's not gonna change
And no matter how far
Wherever you are

Aizen, he wished he could say, was just a stepping stone to victory. Gin was a foolish boy when he decided to follow Aizen's orders. He knew that one day, doing Aizen's bidding would let him lose Rangiku. He knew what she felt on the day he left just by looking in her eyes. It wasn't just pain. It was the loss of a good friend, a lover, and the loss of her trust in him. Sometimes, he wondered why he chose that path and stupidly realized, many times over, that all he had in mind was power.

They were breaking each other's hearts. But Gin regretted breaking hers first. Gin hardly had a heart because when he was still in the Soul Society, he gave it away to Rangiku. He's breaking his own heart just by doing what he did. He sees her in his dreams and wakes up with a heartache but he never shows it to Aizen or Tousen or the Arrancars because they don't need to know about his personal life.

Wherever you go I'm callin
Even when you're breaking my heart
Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Even when we're falling
Even when we're falling apart
Yeah looks like were fallin apart

Anyone got it where the roses sleep
I can make you anything you wanna be
When my bodies close to me
I can give you anything you'd ever need

When I fall to the floor
Coz I can't feel anymore
You can have my heart girl
You don't have to steal anymore
When I look to the stars
Wherever you are

Hueco Mundo doesn't have a night sky but whenever Gin looks at it, he can't help but think of Rangiku. But of course, there are no stars in Hueco Mundo, only a black night sky. Gin is a coward. He's afraid of people's perceptions of his life and his personal business. That's why he keeps his face like that, so nobody can try to see through him. Only one person has, and that was his childhood friend. That's why he trusts her, but he betrayed her trust. Sure, he didn't care about the other shinigamis but that didn't mean he didn't care for Rangiku. After all, Rangiku pretty much knew him inside out.

Ichimaru Gin knew he had to face reality. He was a sap. He loved Rangiku and he knew that nothing could try to take that feeling away from him. His 'tough' outlook was absolute rubbish. Even Rangiku knew that it was all a ploy to impress her. She didn't need to be impressed with the man she loved. He knew that the Arrancar were planning for an attack soon on Karakura Town and he might not get to see her again. This was his last chance to express himself, freely.

Yeah wherever you are
Wherever you go I'm callin
Even when you're breakin my heart
Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Even when we're fallin
Even when we're fallin apart

Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Wherever you go I'm crawlin
Even when we're fallin
Even when we're fallin apart
Yeah I guess we're fallin apart
Yeah it looks like were fallin apart
Yeah I guess I'm fallin apart.

-

Rangiku couldn't sleep. It was the effect of watching too many horror movies before bed. She sat up and rubbed her eyes and went to the kitchen to get some water. It was raining and cold. While she was washing up, she heard a knock on the front door. She opened it slowly and peeked through the tiny crack. Her sleepy eyes widened as she recognized the drenched figure standing outside the door.

"Gin." she said and opened the door wider.

"Ran … I'm s-sorry," he stuttered. "I'm fallin' apart without you an' I know it."

"Gin, I … don't know what to say," she mumbled. Rangiku stepped forward and engulfed him in a hug.

"Don't say anythin' then."

"God Gin, you're so stupid."

"I know."

"That's why I love you."

FIN.

Song used: Fallin' Apart - All American Rejects.

R&R, perhaps?