Firstly, I'd like to thank you for taking the time to click on the link to my story. Hopefully I'm not wasting your time! I do hope you will enjoy this – I got the idea for this fanfic from one of my favourite movies, My Cousin Vinny. The title is a parody of a lyric I heard from a Drake song: 'Hush gotta gun'. I thought it was kind of cool anyways...This is one of my first ever fanfictions. I've been drafting and jotting down notes for this since November. Please review if you can...if not, go away (just kidding!). I don't mind constructive critiques. In fact, I crave it. Please do suggest any ways I can improve on certain aspects of my writing. Just don't be rude about it. Right then, on with the disclaimers: I do not own Harry Potter, it's characters, etc. All intellectual properties are that of JK Rowling. I do not make any monetary gain from this, I do this for fun. Hmm I'll work on my disclaimers in the future. I really do like the nicely worded ones! On with the story...
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"...so I told that chick at the bar I was with my best friend and Dean has the nerve to ask me who that was!" Ron was saying when Harry walked into the Auror office around noon. There was a group consisting of Luna, Parvati, Dean, and Seamus surrounding Ron's desk. Excluding Ron, they were all in Auror training, though Luna had talked of plans of becoming a naturalist, using the Auror training as a back up route.
Harry set his briefcase on his desk, threw his traveling cloak down on top of it, folded his arms across his chest and listened in on Ron's story retelling. "And then Dean tells me he's with Cho Chang and Ginny walks over to this Asian girl and goes 'Hey, Cho! I'm Ginny, remember me from Hogwarts?'" Ron was doing a squeaky impersonation of his kid sister.
"'Nice to meet you! Konichiwa!' Ginny actually bows to this girl!" Ron bowed with an exaggerated parody expression of Ginny and everyone including Harry and Hermione, who was slumped over her desk studying, laughed.
"Then the girl that Ginny thinks is Cho pops her gum and says, 'Bitch, I ain't Cho Chang!'" Ron smacked his lips and pouted in an impersonation of the saucy girl; the whole office was keeled over in fits of giggles.
"But for real though," Dean said, "Cho Chang is always smilin'! I had Advanced Potions with her one year and this is her," Dean smiled wide, his eyes bulged. Harry laughed loudly, as did everyone else. "'I Cho Chang the Hufflepuff.'" Dean sang.
Ron looked around frantically. "WHERE MY FRIED RICE?" Everyone laughed again. Hermione looked up from her study notes, face red and eyes tearing up. "Oh, Ron!" she exclaimed. Harry raised his hand to silence everyone.
"Mornin' Harry. I had just remembered what happened at that Ministry party we had at that fancy ass hotel. I had so much firewhisky, I can't even remember the name of it." Ron said with a grin and fist bumped Dean.
Red headed Ron Weasley, clad in slacks and a button down was working a cushy, well paying job in the Ministry. Despite this, he still very much had the spirit and mentality of a teenager. Hermione was at her own desk studying diligently, her hair straightened and hanging past her shoulders. "Hey Harry!" she greeted brightly. Harry smiled. "Morning Ron, Hermione. All you lot, I hope you're all doing well.
"I'm pleased to inform you that as of last night, much pursued former Death Eater Augustus Rookwood was captured and imprisoned, given a thirty to life sentence in Azkaban to be served at once." Applause filled the room. When it died down, Harry continued.
"Unless I'm mistaken, most of Voldemort's former followers have been annihilated, not counting any of his post defeat followers. Cases of other Death Eaters claim they were killed in the war, have died in Azkaban, currently serving a sentence there, or sent off to St. Mungo's for a mental evaluation on insanity pleas.
"No worries, those who've opted for St. Mungo's are being carefully looked over by dementors in maximum security environments. If their sanity is proven to indeed be intact, they're off to prison." There was a second round of ovation. Ron slowly stopped clapping and his expression went stony at the sight of Draco Malfoy walking through the door.
Harry turned to see the tall, slender platinum blond with pale as ever skin and a pointed face. He looked considerably uncharacteristic; he wasn't sneering, strutting, striding, nor smirking. He even tried to smile a little as he approached Harry with a wrinkled sheet of parchment.
"Hi." Harry greeted Malfoy. Nobody else said anything – they simply stared. Malfoy nodded. "Hey, um, this is from Minister Shacklebolt on the Blackwell-Francis case, a pardon for Mr. Blackwell's use of Dark Magic on Mrs. Francis's delivery owl. He – the Minister – needs you to either approve or deny this pardon."
Harry nodded and took the pardon consideration from Malfoy. "Right. Tell Mr. Shacklebolt that I'll sleep on it." Harry smiled at his little joke; Malfoy's mouth twitched into a smile. He turned to Ron who loudly cleared his throat. "Don't look at me." Ron snapped at Malfoy curtly.
"Let me get outta here." Dean muttered. Seamus followed him out. There was an awful tension in the office after the two had departed. Hermione was no longer smiling contently, her hand was covering her mouth as she stared at Harry, whose gaze darted from Malfoy to Ron.
"Yeah, Parvati. We should go to lunch." Luna chimed in. Parvati nodded, lips pursed. She was already down the hall when Luna stopped at the door. "See you all later." she said quietly and then she was gone.
Malfoy, still fixated on Ron, broke the silence. "Yeah," he said after she had left, "See you." Ron stood up abruptly, raising his wand. Draco looked taken aback but didn't stand down. "Ron, no!" Hermione pleaded, "Not here, on Ministry grounds!"
Malfoy threw her a look of utter disdain, no doubt wishing to insult her with "Mudblood". He thought better of this, however, and turned to leave.
Harry set the pardon down on his desk and rushed to Ron's side. "Lower your wand." Harry hissed into Ron's ear. Ron did so but didn't let up his glare on Malfoy. "Mal-Draco," Harry called after the boy. The name felt unfamiliar on his tongue. Malfoy pivoted on his heel and looked at Harry.
"Ron. You need to control yourself." Harry reprimanded. Ron side glanced at Harry and threw his wand on his desk. He got ready to argue but Hermione spoke up. "Ron. Please." Ron sighed and shook his head at Malfoy.
"No one was talking to you," Ron growled at Malfoy. "Luna was speaking to Harry, Hermione, and I. Know why? 'Cause people like us. They think nothing of you. You were shit as a Death Eater, figures you couldn't do that properly. And now look at you. You're our assistant, Malfoy. Ironic, eh?"
Harry was able to sit Ron back down but quieting him would be a task. "Yeah, you're workin' for a Muggle-born, a blood traitor, and a half blood now, SHOWS YOU MALFOY!" Ron shouted. Harry clenched his jaw and put his hand on Ron's shoulder. Malfoy looked as if about to cry. "Malf-Draco, I'm sorry. Please, tell the Minister that I'll get that pardon back to him before this evening. Come back around 6 o'clock, okay?" Harry said quietly.
Malfoy's lip quivered as he nodded. "I'll come back later then." he sniffed and turned away as a single tear coursed down his cheek. Hermione looked awestruck.
"Look at yourself, you're running back and forth like a bleeding house elf, Harry's HEAD of the Auror department, I'm Vice Head and Hermione's secretary and she's planning on sitting her NEWTs and PASSING. We're successful, got that? You haven't got a damn thing on us!" Ron's words pelted Draco like a hail storm.
"RON! Stop it! Look what you're doing to him!" Hermione pleaded, getting up from her seat and rushing to try her hand at silencing her furious boyfriend.
"Look at him, Harry! Crying like a little bitch! Where ya headed to Malfoy?" Ron taunted as Malfoy stormed out the office and slammed the door.
Through the clear glass door, Harry could see and hear him let out a sob and run to the men's lavatory down the hall. "He's gonna cry in the lavatory," Ron spat, "Pathetic."
Harry shook his head at his friend. "Ron, mate you've got to let it - " Harry was broken off by Ron loudly interjecting "NO!" Hermione wrapped her arms around his shoulders, sniffling uncontrollably, inwardly begging him to just stop. She'd learned in the past to not try to calm him down though. It'd be much better if he'd let his frustrations out before they filled him with hate and a destructive agenda.
"No," Ron said again, more softly this time, "D'you really think I'll just let him off like that? When his father tried to kill my sister? Or when his dear Auntie Bellatrix tortured Hermione? Am I gonna let that ferret face son of a bitch off with a slap on the wrist like the rest of the world did?"
Harry stood board stiff, silenced by Ron's understandable bitterness. "Well am I, Harry?" Ron demanded. Harry swallowed hard and rubbed his temple. "You can't blame Draco for...all that. It wasn't his fault, he was just trying to prove himself to his parents."
Ron snorted. "Whatever! The Malfoys only eluded arrest because of all that 'change of heart' rubbish. They were incompetent Death Eaters, that's all it is!" he concluded. Nostrils flaring and face red, it was as if Ron had never made a joke about Cho Chang ten minutes ago with Dean. Hermione rested her face against his, glad that he was finally finished going off.
Harry was still a bit shaken by Ron's upchuck of emotion but he wasn't all too surprised or upset by it. Instead he turned to the entrance where Ginny was walking towards him. Her hair was up in a sophisticated bun and she was strutting perfectly in her heels without faltering. Harry attempted a smile he knew probably came off as more of a grimace.
"Hey Harry. This came for you." she handed him a tightly folded note with owl claw marks embedded around the edges. "Thanks, Ginny. Hey, um," he led Ginny off to the other side of the office so Ron wouldn't overhear them.
"Ron's not feeling too hot. Draco Malfoy is working here in this department and I think that's starting to bother him. Could you go with him to get a butterbeer or something on your break?" Harry explained hopefully. He must've gotten through to her quickly as she started to seem very concerned. "Yeah, of course. Hermione can come along as well but..." she shook her head. "Never mind. Hey, I'll see you later, I've got to run to Care of Magical Creatures about some Blast-Ended Skrewts. Any chance you have a clue what those are?"
Harry smirked slyly. "Gotta love Hagrid. Yeah, actually I do. Just be careful." She nodded slowly and left with one glance over her shoulder at her brother who was being comforted by Hermione.
Harry was going to have to transfer Malfoy to another department. Why he was working as an assistant in this office, Harry didn't know but he did know that he'd have to do something about it for Ron's sake.
Looking down at the note, Harry began to unfold it, hoping that enclosed was some sort of good news at least...
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Dying to know what you think of the first chapter...kindly post feedback if you will! Yes, there will be subsequent chapters. But only if I am pleased with the feedback...;)