Yang must have gone through in her head a thousand times what she would say when she saw her sister again. Nothing ever seemed right. What could she say anyway? Yang had no idea where her relationship with her sister stood. The last time Yang had seen Ruby she had dejectedly ignored her baby sister's every word. Maybe she cried for help, solace, forgiveness, maybe love, Yang couldn't remember past the terrible nothing that she was drowning in. One thing was clear, whatever Ruby had needed of her, Yang didn't give it. And by the time Yang finally came back to herself, it was too late. Ruby was gone, and there was every possibility that Yang would never see her baby sister alive again. And Yang thanked every power she could think of that Ruby now stood in front of her. Frozen in place and clearly not well, but alive, beautifully wonderfully alive. Her breath caught in her throat, but she forced herself to speak.
"I love you."
She spoke the truth. When everything was said and done, that would remain. Yang loved Ruby more than anything in this world. That didn't stop the words from sounding useless. Hearing the three words in her voice only reminded her of all of the times she could have said it but didn't. Here and now, they were just too little too late. But what could she do? No other words could say what she needed to say. Nothing could just magically make this right. The word sorry wouldn't even start to begin to express how sorry she was.
The distance between them might have been miles instead of a couple of yards. After searching for her sister for so long, after finally finding her, Yang wanted nothing more than to close the final distance that separated them. She wanted to hold her sister. She wanted to prove to herself that Ruby was alive, and this wasn't just a dream. Yang just wanted to hold her.
Yang didn't hold that right.
Not anymore.
Ruby was the one to leave, but Yang was the one that didn't stop her. Yang let her go, hell, she half pushed her away. Ruby needed her and she was so caught up in her own life and problems that she didn't even care that her baby sister was hurting. She let Ruby suffer and even that, Yang added to Ruby's suffering. She made her sister feel like she didn't care, like she didn't love Ruby anymore. It was a lie, but Yang did nothing to correct it.
She was correcting it now.
She just hoped Ruby believed her.
So, even though not holding her sister physically hurt, she stayed where she was. After everything, she knew that where they went from here was up to Ruby. Yang couldn't force her sister to do anything she didn't want, if Ruby wanted to run, Yang wouldn't stop her. Not now. And that very fact broke her heart. The very thought that she might have very well lost her sister stabbed her through the chest and made it very hard to breathe.
Ruby wasn't making this easy. As soon as the words left Yang's mouth, every semblance of color drained from the girl's face. Silver eyes filled with tears and Yang had to force herself to stay put. Her vision blurred slightly and the pressure in her chest made air a rarity. Ruby was shaking and by the smell of roses in the air, Yang was certain Ruby was about to sprint as far away from Yang as possible. Yang wouldn't have blamed her for it, but she knew it would hurt something fierce. If Ruby didn't want her anymore, she really had no one to blame but herself. She would never stop fighting for Ruby, but they had reached a point where everything was wrong, and if they wanted to salvage anything of their sisterhood, it was going to take time. And of course, it would take Ruby opening up to Yang, and Yang knew better than anyone that Ruby tended to close off after being hurt. This was going to be a long battle, but it was one that Yang had no intention of walking away from before it was done.
Everyone was looking at them. They probably felt they were intruding. If they were right or wrong, Yang couldn't be sure. She really didn't care. The only thing that mattered right now was Ruby. But all the same, she did appreciate that they respected them enough to remain silent.
Yang wasn't stupid, nor was she ignorant. Yang deserved Ruby's hesitation. After all, how many times had Ruby said the exact same thing, only to be met with silence from Yang time and time again? Far too many. Ruby deserved far better than people who wouldn't return her love. At this point, Yang could only hope Ruby still loved her enough to give her another chance.
The time ticked by, but Yang paid it no heed. She could stay here all day, all night, if she had to. She'd do whatever it took, but she's not going to fail this time.
Ruby disappeared in a flurry of rose petals.
Yang's heart shattered.
Not even a second later, a form crashed into her own, sending her staggering back a few steps before she regained her balance. It took Yang a second to come to her senses and register the excess of red and the small arms wrapped around her and gripping her tightly. After that, she pulled Ruby even closer still. She pulled Ruby's head under her chin, as the tears that she had been fighting, escaped her eyes and flowed down her cheeks into Ruby's hair.
The top of her shirt was wet too.
Ruby shook something fierce against her, and Yang knew it had nothing to do with being cold. Yang knew that the shaking would stop when Ruby had tired herself out, and all she could do was hold her sister close as she physically could.
"Say it again?" The desperate plea was quiet and muffled against her neck. Yang was sure it was only meant for her to hear. Yang stopped breathing and her eyes burned more fiercely that they ever had while on her semblance.
She pulled Ruby closer, "I love you." She was quiet too. She'd scream it to the world, she had no doubt about that, but here and now, they weren't words for the world they were words for Ruby and Ruby alone. "My baby sister, my everything, I love you, Ruby Rose, I love you so much." Ruby made a distressed sound in the back of her throat and burrowed further into Yang's embrace, "I love you. I love you. I love you."
Yang choked on a sob, but kept on forcing her voice to repeat the three words over and over again. Each time brought another round of tears to Yang's eyes. But she was far from finished. She'd say it as many times as Ruby needed and more. She'd say it for as long as the words remained true. And there was nothing that existed in this life or the next that could make them a lie. Over and over again, so Ruby could believe it, so she'd never forget.
Ruby's knees buckled and Yang found herself supporting most of her weight. Yang had forgotten how light Ruby actually was. Or maybe their time apart had cost Ruby more than what would appear at first glance. Yang hoped and prayed it was the former. Still whispering, Yang lowered them both to the ground. She wasn't about to let her sister go. Yang had months of holding her sister to catch up on with interest. They could be here a while.
Ruby sagged against Yang and let her shoulders drop. The shaking came to a standstill, but Ruby's breathing was still off, and tears continued to soak Yang's shoulder, "I love you so so much." Yang pulled her closer, "I gotcha, I'm here. I love you, Ruby. I love you."
"I missed you." The whisper was faint, sad, tired.
Yang nodded so that Ruby could feel the movement of her head, "I missed you too."
There was a pause where Ruby's breath evened out, but Yang could still feel the thudding of her heart under her fingers, "You love me?"
If Yang wondered if her heart could break any more than it already had, she got her answer. She closed her eyes against the onslaught of pain, "Yes." Nothing would be more true. "I love you, Ruby. I've loved you since the moment I learned about you, and I never stopped. Not for a moment."
Ruby had relaxed in her embrace, and playing with the ends of her blonde hair tears still spilling down both girl's faces, "I thought…maybe, you didn't want me anymore."
"I always wanted you. I'm so sorry I made you think any different. I didn't think I deserved you, still don't, but now I'm ready to fight for you. If you'll have me."
Yang had to strain to hear Ruby's whispering voice, "I wanted you. You were hurting, and I couldn't stop it." Ruby made a distressed sound in the back of her throat and curled further into herself and Yang's embrace. "I wanted to make it stop, and I tried, I tried so hard, but I couldn't help you. I didn't want to leave you behind. I had to end this and I…"
"Hey," Yang tried to keep her voice light and gentle, when all she wanted to do is break down, "It's okay, you're okay, I'm okay, we're okay. Believe me, I get it." And she did, it hurt like hell, but she understood, "I'm so proud of you." How much weight those words held? Yang was never too sure, but she felt the primal need to make sure Ruby heard it.
"I love you, Yang. More than anything." Ruby lifted herself out of Yang's embrace and Yang reluctantly let her go. Ruby's bloodshot silver eyes met her own lilac ones. Yang made herself hold eye contact with her sister's troubled gaze, "I don't want to lose you, ever."
Yang sucked in as much air as she possibly could, but her throat was as tight as ever. She forced a smile to her face, "You won't." Maybe later she would wonder if that was a smart thing to promise Ruby, what with the dangerous lives they lead, but right now she intended with everything she was to keep it. She reached up to brush a lock of hair out of Ruby's face, she didn't miss how Ruby flinched slightly at the contact, "As long as you want me, you got me."
Ruby stared at her. Yang held her gaze, but really all she wanted to do was pull her sister back to herself and prove her sincerity. Ruby swallowed thickly and hesitantly nodded, "I want you. I…yeah…I want you." Yang smiled brightly at her, and Ruby slowly reflected it. Ruby embraced Yang again and leaned against her shoulder. Ruby whispered so quietly that Yang had to strain to hear her, "You got me too."
Yang didn't want to ever let her go.
an; and that's that, hope you enjoyed it, please leave a review if you have time. ensia