Sometimes, though faint as it was, you could hear Akito cry at night.
When the sky darkened and the estate went silent, you could hear his soft sobs if you listened close enough. It was childlike in its yearning, confusion and sorrow laced into the sounds like Akito couldn't live without it embedded into his heart.
If you asked Yuki, Kyo, or even Tohru, it could be said that they didn't think Akito had one. Even if Tohru kept quiet about her feelings, the resentment was still there in her eyes, her posture that stiffened when the name was uttered. Akito's existence was something even worse than the curse place on their family, he knew that.
But at night, when there is no one to distract him from his thoughts, nothing to stifle his self hatred for his pitiful self and the body he was born with, he cries. He was an incorrigible being, one that didn't deserve to live, but he knew that he wasn't really alive, as this body of his was not his own. He could be likened to a shell, but he refused to let himself become something as disgusting as that. He wasn't happy, he never really had been, so why should other's receive the joy that he was so starved of? Why could they smile so carefree and joyful, why he sit emptying his stomach and coughing up blood, alone?
Akito didn't have anything to live for but his pride, so why were Yuki and Kyo allowed the intimacy that he wished for all of his life?
If Akito couldn't have those things, then neither could the others of the zodiac. They didn't deserve it as much as he did. If they had things to look forward to, things that made them happy outside of the Sohma family, outside of Akito's self, then those things shouldn't exist. He killed Kana's being in Hatori's mind to replace his own, so it should be easy to do it to Tohru, right?
Akito wasn't able to rid of her beautiful soul, the one he was so jealous of, so he wept alone, with only his own company.
If the "soul" was kept in the "heart", and he hadn't one, then what was he? What made up this person that he calls himself?
Who was he?