What is more enticing, the darkness or the light? Normally it depends which side you are on. If you are Light, the Dark is tempting. Likewise, if you are Dark, the Light is tempting. Or maybe you could be one of the kinds of people that are sided with the Light and will only be with the Light, or likewise if you are with the Dark and intend to only be with the Dark.
Or maybe you could be a rare individual that desires both. The Light is so soothing and comforting, possibly the only place to find true love and happiness. But the Dark is so mysterious and unpredictable and exciting. It's so hard to choose between the two.
That was a certain individual's problem. She was the Messiah of Light. She had been introduced to love by the Darkness and slowly enchanted by the Light. She cannot help but love them both; though she knows in the end she will only end up with one.
Who will she choose? Will she be safe in the warmth of the Light or will she risk a walk into the shadowed contours of the Dark? HOW will she choose? What thoughts and feelings would lead up to the final choice? Would she choose correctly?
But the most important question of all was this: What IS the correct choice?
WHO is the correct choice?
Choosing Without Spells
Written by D-chan
It was the day to leave. Usagi Tsukino, a fourteen-year-old Gryffindor, was the only one still sitting on her bed. Her hair had not been bothered to be pulled into the normal style, an odango on either side of her head with long streamers falling to her knees. Now the long, silky golden hair trailed all the way to the floor if she would stand.
Her trunk sat on the floor at her feet. A small, fluffy white kitten was curled in her lap. It was her new pet; a gift from one of the boys she loved so much.
Yes, that had been plural. Usagi loved two boys; loved them very much and cared for each so deeply. How it was possible she didn't know. But it was happening.
Usagi was going to miss Hogwarts. She was going to miss the warm, magical feeling it held and her friends. She was going to miss Fred and George Weasely, the brilliantly funny twins. She was going to miss Ron, the sweet but somewhat ignorant child of the Weaselys. She would even miss Hermione Granger's constant nagging attitude but brilliant mind.
She would certainly miss Harry Potter, the hero and a prefect of the Gryffindor House (Which, by the way, their house won again, of course). He was nice and brave and certainly determined when it counted, if not somewhat mischievous. Yes, she loved him very much, even if she had only recently realized it.
She was definitely going to miss Draco Malfoy. Never mind that he was cold-hearted and a smug spoiled child. Never mind that he was a Gryffindor's worst enemy, a Slytherin. Never mind that he'd tried to get Harry into trouble countless times. All Usagi wanted to remember was that he'd given her her very first kiss and that he definitely had a soft side that he tried to hide.
The door opened, making her jump. "Usagi?"
She smiled. "Hi, Hermione."
Hermione glanced around. "Do you have your things? We're going out soon."
"All right. Thanks for telling me." Usagi stroked her kitten on the head before she slipped the tiny thing into a large pocket in her robe.
Hermione caught her shoulder when she bent down to grab her trunk. "Usagi, when are you going to choose?"
Usagi sighed. "Hermione, you ask me this every day--"
"And I never get the right answer, which is TODAY," Hermione said firmly. "Usagi, you can't keep Harry waiting all summer for the possibility you might reject him for... Malfoy."
It was no secret that, even after Malfoy had more or less saved Harry's life, all Gryffindors still hated him. "I know," Usagi said quietly. "Just give me a couple more hours. I swear I'll tell them before we get off and leave."
"Fine." Hermione seemed to finally notice the kitten and she smiled. "Aw, it's cute, Usagi. Where did you get it?"
"A gift," Usagi said softly. "She's a gift."
"A girl kitten? What's her name?" Hermione asked as they walked out.
Usagi paused. "Andromeda."
"Really?" Hermione looked somewhat impressed. "It's a cute name."
"Yeah." Usagi stared down at the trunk. "Could you help me get this into the hallway, Hermione?"
"Sure." Hermione studied the girl for a moment but couldn't find a trace of emotion on Usagi's face. 'I suppose that's what happens when you're caught between two boys,' she thought uncertainly. 'Maybe...'
At the Hogwarts Express train, many students were running around, some talking to their friends and others trying to get their luggage into the proper compartments. Usagi finally managed to squeeze through the crowd and, with a little difficulty, managed to shove her trunk into a fitting spot. A small meow made her look down.
She pulled Andromeda from her pocket. "Don't worry," she soothed. "I'll find us a private place to sit." She climbed on board and walked down a couple cars until she heard her name being called.
"Usagi!"
She paused and looked over to see Harry smiling at her. "Would you like to sit with us?" he offered.
She shook her head. "No thank you, Harry. I want to be alone for a little while."
He studied her face for a moment before he nodded. "Sure. I'll see you later, then."
"Okay." With that said she turned around and walked into the next car. It seemed deserted. She found a corner to sit in and gently set the small white kitten in her lap. Her cat looked up at her with wide baby blue eyes. She had to smile; it was very cute.
What Usagi really wanted was some space to think. She knew that she had to choose one of them soon... But how could she do it without hurting the other's feelings? She knew that if she chose Malfoy Harry would be hurt. Malfoy wouldn't show it, but he might be hurt and angry.
She barely had time to think these thoughts, however, because the car door opened with a bang. Usagi winced and looked up to see Pansy Parkinson, a Slytherin and associated with Malfoy.
"You," she said coldly, walking up to her. Usagi realized that she was alone. "You," she repeated.
"Yes, it's me," Usagi said with forced calm. "May I help you?"
"Yeah, you can help me," she spat. "You can help by leaving Malfoy alone."
She hadn't been expecting that. Usagi blinked rapidly. "Ex... Excuse me?" she stammered.
Pansy glowered at her. "I know what you think you're doing. You think that by putting some kind of cheap spell--"
"For the last time, I don't use spells to get what I want," Usagi said through clenched teeth. Honestly! She was sick of that sort of reaction when people found out about her and Malfoy, or even her and Harry.
"Whatever you're doing, it's a cheap way to make Malfoy THINK that he likes you."
Usagi's face colored. "I'm not doing anything. I'm sorry if you think I--"
"No," Pansy said coldly. "You don't understand the HALF of it. A Slytherin and a Gryffindor? It doesn't work that way!" She leaned in close, glaring daggers. "We Slytherins are better off without someone like YOU trying to seduce our leader." Usagi choked as Pansy accused her of seducing Malfoy, her face bright red. "You'd better remember that and stay the hell away from him. The rest of us, too!" With that Pansy Parkinson turned and stormed off, slamming the car door behind her so hard the glass shattered.
Usagi sighed, pulling out her wand. "Reparo," she said. The glass, as if on its own, floated up and clicked back into place. Afterwards it looked as if nothing had happened to it; not a scratch was on it.
A small meow caught her attention once again. Looking down, she saw that Andromeda was looking a little rumpled, as if someone had awakened her from a pleasant nap. Usagi stroked her head, however, and she calmed down. "Oh, Andy," she whispered, pressing her cheek against the soft fur of the kitten. She heard Andromeda purr in her ear and she continued, "How am I supposed to choose between them? Getting all these nasty comments from the Slytherins sure isn't helping Draco much, huh?"
Andromeda hissed a little, looking at Usagi almost resentfully. She sighed and closed her eyes, one hand smoothing the long fur over her kitten's back.
Finally, though, after what seemed like hours Usagi's eyes reopened. "I know," she whispered. She kissed the top of Andromeda's head and slipped her gently back into her pocket. "Let's go find Harry."
It didn't take long to find him. He was one car down and in the third compartment, talking to Ron, Hermione and Neville. "Harry," she said softly. All conversation stopped at everyone looked at her. She flushed and said, "Um... I need to talk to Harry for a few minutes."
"Sure," Harry said cheerfully, standing up. "I'll be right back," he assured the others. Once they were back in the deserted car he said, "So what's this about?"
She coughed a little, her cheeks bright pink. "I decided. I thought about it for the past two weeks, especially today. And I decided."
"Really?" He tried not to sound too hopeful. "Who is it."
"Well... I..."
* * *
"Ron, keep your head down," Hermione hissed. "They'll be able to tell we're listening if they see that flame on your head!"
"Oh, like they wouldn't be able to recognize that rat's nest you call hair," Ron retorted, shoving her to the side.
"Don't push me!" she growled, elbowing him aside and pressing her ear to the wall.
Ron glared at her. "That kind of HURT, you know," he snapped, pushing her.
"Ow! Well, you deserved it more than I did, you brainless git," she said, glaring at him.
"Brainless, huh," he huffed. "Just because you're a teacher's pet--"
"I am not a teacher's pet!" she cried indignantly.
"Oh? Then what was with all the blushing from the praise from Lockhart second year?" Ron smirked. Hermione's cheeked colored.
"That has absolutely nothing to do with anything!"
"It has to do with everything!"
"Ha!"
* * *
Harry's expression was now one of shock. "Really?"
Usagi nodded, her face a little redder than was normal. "Y-yes."
He studied her for a long moment before wrapping his arms around her tightly. She returned the quick embrace and pulled away. "I don't mean to leave you so quickly but I really should tell Malfoy before we get home," she said softly.
"Yeah..." Harry blinked then nodded. "Yes, of course. Um... I'll see you later, then?"
She smiled. "Of course. See you later, Harry." With that she gave a small wave and disappeared into the next car. Andromeda was meowing in her pocket and she pulled her out again. "Do you think I made the right choice?" she asked softly. Wide baby blue eyes stared back in response. Usagi sighed and cradled the kitten close.
Finding Malfoy took longer. She had to check each compartment; she couldn't hear him speaking to anyone so he might have been either by himself or sulking with Crabbe and Goyle.
Finally, though, she found him sitting - surprisingly, alone - in a car and staring moodily out the window. A small, nervous smile played on her face. "Can I sit down?"
He didn't seem startled at all when he tilted his head to the side to look at her. "Don't see why not."
"Thanks," she said softly, sitting across from him. She settled Andromeda in her lap.
Malfoy narrowed his eyes at the cat. "You still have that?"
Usagi glanced up. "Of course. She's so cute. Aren't you, Andy?" she cooed to the kitten, gently running her hand over its head.
He snorted. "Andy?"
"Short for Andromeda," she explained. Then her expression turned serious. "We need to talk."
Malfoy nodded. "So talk."
Usagi wasn't sure how to start but she finally said, "I had a run-in with Pansy Parkinson."
His ice blue eyes immediately narrowed. "And?"
She shrugged, looking down at Andromeda. "Oh, you know, she said the usual. 'Gryffindors can't be with Slytherins, it doesn't work that way'," she mimicked. "'We Slytherin's are better off without YOU trying to seduce our leader'--"
"WHAT?" Malfoy interrupted, an incredulous look on his face. "She said that?" Usagi nodded and he laughed harshly. "Seducing me?" he repeated.
Usagi nodded. "I told them I didn't do it. I mean... That I didn't try... I mean..." she stammered, her cheeks flaming with a sudden blush.
Malfoy stopped laughing and stared at her, the cold mask back in place. "What do you think?"
Usagi crossed her ankles over each other, frowning. "Well... I just got done talking to Harry," she said softly. "And... I don't think he's very happy." When Malfoy said nothing she took a deep breath and said, so softly it was barely a whisper, "I told him I loved you."
For a moment Malfoy could have sworn his heart skipped a beat. But that was impossible. Even so, did he dare hope...?
Now she was looking at him, her eyes searching his for a response, any kind of response. Would now be the time when he admitted that he loved her, too, or would he laugh in her face and finally reveal that it had all been a joke? She held her breath, waiting for the verdict.
Now, however, Malfoy stared at the kitten. "So I did pick out the right one," he said quietly. Usagi nodded. Andromeda had been a gift from Malfoy, though if anyone asked Usagi would tell them there had been no signature when she had awoke to find the fluffy white being sprawled on her stomach one morning. But the questioning look in Harry's eyes had confirmed her conclusion; Malfoy had left the cat there for her.
"Draco," she finally said. "I need to know."
"Know what?"
She frowned. "If... If you love me or not."
He diverted his gaze out the window. Two months earlier he would have laughed at the idea of him loving somebody; anybody. Now, though... Now it was different. He'd chosen to give his loyalties to Usagi rather than his own father.
"That's a ridiculous question," he finally said. Usagi winced. The whole thing had been a game, after all? "However, I think I can understand where it's coming from," he continued, surprising her. "I never told you that, did I?"
"Told me what?" she asked.
He looked back at her and, for once, liked the fact that the cars were so small. It gave him just enough lack of room to do what he did next. He was able to lean forward and grasp her chin and pull her forward until his lips brushed hers. "I love you," he said quietly.
She couldn't help it. Usagi smiled and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. "I love you, too, Draco," she said happily.
"Yes, well..." Draco frowned uneasily. "Don't get used to me saying it."
"I know. It doesn't matter to me," she said softly.
Suddenly Andromeda let out a yowl or protest. Draco and Usagi parted quickly, startled. Andromeda glared at them indignantly. "Sorry, Andy," Usagi said soothingly. "I didn't mean to hurt you." Andromeda hissed as if in resent and leapt on to the next chair, curling up and making herself comfortable. Usagi giggled. "She's just like you, Draco."
"Hmph," he muttered, leaning back in his seat, but he was smirking. "So where is your home anyway?"
"In Japan."
He stared at her. "You're Japanese?"
She smiled sheepishly. "Did I forget to mention that?" She gave a small laugh and glanced out the window. "Yeah, umm... My home USED to be in Japan, anyway, but we moved to England a little while ago."
"You and your family." It was a statement, not a question.
She nodded. "Yeah," she said softly. "Me and my family."
He frowned. She never talked about her family at all, now that he thought of it. Hell, he hadn't even known she was Japanese until now. Draco now knew she was a pureblood, but something was bothering him...
"Usagi," he said abruptly. "I want you to send letters as much as possible."
She blinked. The request - more like a demand - sounded so absurd. "What? Why?"
He shrugged, trying to look careless. "Just tell me what's going on at your home, all right?"
She plastered a smile to her face and Draco immediately knew she was hiding something. "All right."
"Don't leave anything out."
She forced a laugh. "What are you so upset about? Oh, look, we're stopping. I can see my mother." She stood and glanced at him, smiling sweetly and offering a hand to him. "Shall we?"
He rolled his eyes at her antics but took her hand anyway. Andromeda meowed in protest and Usagi had to stop to pick her up and slip her into her pocket. Her fingers were warm clasped around his and Draco was able to ignore all the shocked or angry looks of different students.
Once off the train he and Usagi grabbed their trunks. He refused to leave, however, until he saw who her mother was.
"Mother," Usagi called, her hand sliding out of his. She paused to glance back at him and smiled once again. He didn't smile back but she didn't seem to mind because she walked up, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him in front of everyone.
She pulled back enough to whisper, "See you in a couple months." Then she pecked him on the lips and let go of him, giggling at the stunned expression on his face. Then she grasped the handle of her trunk and dragged it over to a woman with unkempt black hair and green eyes. Malfoy frowned, not liking the looks of this "mother" Usagi had. Then he noticed people, particularly students, were staring at him.
"What are you staring at?" he demanded. Almost instantly everyone looked away, but he knew half of the hushed whispers were about him. He didn't care anymore.
"Draco," his mother's sharp voice carried. "Come."
His eyes returned to their cold, icy blue orbs. The next couple of months would be hell, he knew. He was especially looking forward to the beginning of the next school year this time.
~ * ~
~ owari ~
Short, I know, but I had to end it. Besides, I have a new idea in mind. ^^ Not to mention I have to get back to work on my Ron/Usa fic. ^^ I'm glad to have been successful thus far and I'm really happy everyone liked it!
Special thanks to:
Usa-chan ~ For being my Oneechan and getting me into Harry Potter in the first place! ^_^ And for introducing me to the greatness that is Draco Malfoy! =D Doomo arigotou, Neechan!