Elizabeth was fine. It should have been all that mattered and Neal was grateful that Peter's wife was found alive and well and Keller was safely behind bars, hopefully to rot for the rest of this life.

But Neal...well things hadn't gone as he expected after that. Peter had exploded once Elizabeth was safe and most of that anger was directed at Neal, something the ex con could more than understand and had been expecting since Elizabeth had disappeared. Neal had hoped things would return to normal after that.

But Peter wasn't ok and he was ordered to take a leave of absence. And Neal was told to go home and stay out of trouble...for how long no one would tell him. Hughes' last order before Jones escorted him out of the building was to leave Peter alone.

So Neal did. And the minutes turned to hours and the hours into days and besides June, he talked to no one. Not that anyone wanted to talk to him. Mozzie was gone. Sara wasn't returning his phone calls and he didn't dare try to contact Peter or Elizabeth.

He painted and he thought way too much and he wondered if choosing Peter was the right choice.

At three weeks, the loneliness was too much for him to handle and he took out his phone and texted a simple message...I chose you. He waited and he hoped but when no response came he tossed the phone aside and curled up on the sofa, and waited for boredom to lull him into a restless sleep.

At four weeks, Neal headed out of the mansion on his daily walk. It wasn't his intention to head to the Burke's home but he wasn't surprised when he found himself standing outside and wishing they would allow him in. It was early morning but he saw movement through the window and knew someone was home.

He rang the bell and waited. He rang it again and finally the door opened.

"Elizabeth" he said quietly.

"Neal, what are you doing here?" She opened the door further and motioned for him to enter.

"I was hoping to talk to Peter" he answered, with his eyes darting around the room. "Is he home?"

"Neal, he's at work."

"What?" Neal shook his head in disbelief. "Elizabeth, what's going on and why won't Peter talk to me?"

"Neal, I can't." She turned her back on him. "Please go."

"Do you two hate me that much?" Neal's voice cracked briefly. "I'm sorry" he whispered before quickly leaving.

Later that evening Neal sat at the table, mulling over a glass of wine. He knew he could get the tracker off and he was leaning towards leaving...He took out his phone and quickly texted Peter.

I guess I owe you a goodbye. Neal packed a small duffle bag and eyed his ankle. The phone rang and he grabbed it.

Please stay.

Neal laughed. Peter wanted him to stay...for what...

Why? It didn't take long for Peter to answer.

Jones will be by in the morning. Please be there.

"Damn you" Neal yelled as he slammed his glass to the floor. "Why won't you talk to me?" Neal picked up his paint brush and stared at the canvas.

"I can't do this." He ripped off the paper and crumpled it up before racing out of the apartment.

"Are you planning on jumping?" It was a familiar voice but not the one Neal was hoping to hear as he glanced over his shoulder to see Jones approaching.

"Where are the Marshalls?" Neal asked, with little interest.

"Peter called them and said he was with you."

Neal let out a deep breath as he scanned the Hudson River below him. "So he's protecting me but he won't talk to me. Jones, what the hell is going on?"

"Neal, let's go back to your place and we can talk."

"We can talk here" Neal countered swiftly, as the strong winds whipped the water below them. Jones leaned against the railing, mirroring Neal's position as the two men looked outward.

"That night we had to pull Peter off of you..."

"You mean when he was trying to killing me" Neal interrupted as he absently touched his neck, the feeling of Peter's hands choking him still a vivid memory.

"Yeah, he was" Jones agreed quietly. "After Diana took you home Peter admitted to me he would have killed you if we hadn't intervened. He was that angry."

"He had every right to be" Neal stated. "It was my fault Keller took Elizabeth."

"Neal, he also told me he was scared and it was so unlike Peter I had to tell Hughes." Jones grimaced. "Things kind of spiraled out of control after that. From what I hear it wasn't real good at the Burke home."

"But why can't I see him?" Neal asked before realization set in. "He doesn't want to see me, does he?"

"Neal, he's embarrassed. Peter Burke doesn't lose control like that and you're more than just his CI and you know it."

"Is he getting help?"

"He is" Jones answered.

"What am I supposed to do?" Neal whined.

"Stay out of trouble. Once Peter is released by the therapist, you'll come back also."

"But Elizabeth said..."

"It's not official" Jones put forth. "He comes in and does paperwork and some consulting but that's it. He just needs something to keep his mind busy."

"I know how that feels" Neal muttered. "Jones, how is he... really?"

"He's not Peter. Not yet but he's getting better. It's a little cool out here. Are you ready to go home?"

Neal wasn't. And it felt good to talk to someone and he realized how much he missed the others, not just Peter. "Jones, you want to get something to eat?"

"Sure." Jones smiled. "Let's go." He gently pulled Neal away from the railing and together they walked towards the car.

It was three in the morning and Neal couldn't sleep. It was a nice evening with Jones and he was in a better mood then he had been in a long time. Neal picked up his phone and quickly sent a message to Peter.

I'm sorry.

He was surprised when the agent responded back a few minutes later.

Me too.

Neal smiled sadly. He missed Peter and he missed the life he had and he wanted it back but he wasn't sure Peter could handle hearing that so he turned his phone off, and settled back against his pillow, and hoped things would soon go back to normal.

On the first day of fall Neal sat on June's balcony enjoying his cup of coffee. He was still banished from the bureau but his co-workers had been visiting regularly and even Elizabeth stopped by a couple of times. There was talk that he and Peter would go back soon but he wasn't one to get his hopes up, especially when Peter still wasn't talking to him, though they texted each other often.

"Speak of the devil" Neal said as the phone vibrated. He waited a few minutes before checking his message.

Morning Neal. Did you see the game last night? If the Yankees get to the World Series we're going to a game.

Neal smiled. Of course he didn't watch and Peter knew it.

I would love to go.

But you hate baseball. Peter responded quickly.

What does that tell you? Neal's eyes misted up as he closed them tightly and wondered when Peter would understand what this was doing to him. Finally he checked his phone again.

I miss you too.

Neal didn't bother to hold the tears back as he lowered his head to his forearms and cried.

Neal stepped back and studied his latest creation. He'd been painting so much he probably had enough to replace those lost in the warehouse explosion. He heard a knock at his door and frowned; June was gone for the evening and he had no idea who that could be.

"Coming" he yelled when the knocking became more persistent.

"Peter." Neal couldn't hide the surprise he felt at seeing the agent...his friend...standing there. "What are doing here?"

Peter hesitated as he took a step forward and waited for Neal to let him in. "You didn't answer my text and I started to worry." Peter shrugged as the awkwardness of the situation was felt by both men.

"Sorry, I was painting and I didn't hear it." Neal eyed his friend. "You look good. How are you?"

"OK" Peter answered and they both knew that was only partially true. "We go back Monday if you're ready."

Neal took a deep breath as he tried to keep his emotions in check. "Ready?" He asked in a shuddering breath. "I..." Neal paused as he lowered his head and sighed.

"I know" Peter quietly said when it was apparent Neal couldn't continue. "Neal, I'm sorrier than you'll ever know." He held his hand out and waited for Neal to take it. Finally Neal looked at him with tears flowing freely down his face. "I chose you" he said so sadly that Peter had to look away.

"Neal, something in me broke and I couldn't deal with you until I dealt with myself." He knew Neal didn't understand and he wasn't ready to tell him everything. "Neal, I promise we'll fix this together. I know you don't trust me but someday I hope you will." Peter turned towards the door, feeling completely defeated and unsure how to help his friend.

"Peter...wait." Neal wiped his face with his sleeves. "I have beer...and I'm sure there's a game on." Neal seemed so desperate for him to stay Peter didn't bother reminding him that he hated sports.

"Sounds good" Peter said as he followed Neal towards the TV, briefly stopping at the fridge to grab the beer.

Two hours later Neal was curled up on the sofa sound asleep and Peter watched him, still nursing his first bottle. There was so much he still needed to work through...the rage he felt that night still haunted him...but Elizabeth was safe, they all were and he would make things up to Neal.

"Neal, I never wanted to hurt you" Peter whispered as he quietly stood and covered his friend with a blanket. He wrote a quick note for Neal and let himself out.

Neal sat at his desk and started picking through the files Peter had given him. The morning had gone well, though it was obvious everyone was trying a little too hard to pretend things were back to normal. But Neal didn't care; it felt good to be arguing with Diana again and even Hughes seemed happy to see him.

Neal felt his phone vibrate and was surprised to see he had a message from Peter. He glanced towards the agent's office but Peter had his head down, and wouldn't meet his gaze. Neal checked the message and smiled broadly.

You chose right.

'I know' Neal silently agreed before returning his attention to the files.