Just a Fool

Third Person P.O.V.

It had been three months since the end of Total Drama All Stars and as much as she hated admitting it, Gwen felt like crap on toast. She and Courtney had tried to smooth things over, and they were friend-ish again, but they were just way too different to be close friends. She'd spent the past few months at home doing absolutely nothing.

Well, not "nothing." Sometimes she'd get dragged out of the house by LeShawna and Bridgette. With a new season of Total Drama starting up in the summer, she was required to attend some promotional events.

But mostly she drank. It's not like she was an alcoholic. She didn't need much to get buzzed nor did she crave it. It was just something to do to pass the time.

Sometimes people forgot she started on Total Drama when she was sixteen and after five seasons, was of legal drinking age. She got carded all the time.

Gwen P.O.V.

Another shot of whiskey please bartender
Keep it coming 'til I don't remember at all
How bad it hurts when you're gone

I'd spent the day shopping with LeShawna for a viewing party they were going to next week. The Playa was premiering the first episode of season six and hosting an after-party. LeShawna and Harold had been on a sort-of time out and she wanted to "drive him wild" with how good she looked. She'd picked out a yellow dress with a lace back that ended mid-thigh. And she did look really good. She tried to get me in a few things but I'd refused. So now I had to go shopping with her again later this week.

I found myself walking toward a bar I'd frequented lately - "The Drunken Stupor." A classy joint.

As I walked in the bartender, Danny, started mixing my usual drink, "The One That Got Away". It had coke, Jack Daniels and cherries. And they were damn good.

"Hey Gwen," Danny greeted as he slid the drink over.

I pulled money for the drink and the next two or three I was anticipating. "Thanks Danny."

He nodded and left me to myself and the melancholy music playing throughout the joint.

Turn the music up a little bit louder
Just gotta get past the midnight hour
Maybe tomorrow it won't be this hard

I glanced around the room and saw a few of the usuals - Homeless Henry, Andy the Addict, Pete. There was some sort of late night talk show playing on the TV across the room. Pete caught my glance and gave me a nod hello.

I couldn't believe I was at the Drunken Stupor at eleven o'clock on a Sunday night. I couldn't believe I knew the usuals. Well, I had been coming here for the past month and a half. At some point I got sick of drinking alone in my room. At least here I had some sort of company.

With all this Total Drama stuff, I'd been thinking a lot about Duncan. Another failed relationship under my belt.

But this was the relationship that hurt. I'd had a couple of insignificant boyfriends before Total Drama and then Trent as a first real relationship. But Duncan was something else.

I took a long drink of "The One That Got Away" and sighed deeply.

It wasn't until the show was over when it hit me that we were actually over. And LeShawna had been promising things would get better.

Who am I kidding?
I know what I'm missing

She and Bridge try to keep my busy and keep my mind off him but it never works for long.

Duncan was a big part of my life and it's not easy letting him go. And I think everyone but me knew that.

I remember when I came home from season five, Dylan came up and hugged me.

"Mom! Brat! I'm home!" I dropped my bags at the entryway as my mom came to greet. She talked about how much she missed me and grabbed my bag while heading to the laundry room.

I started to follow her and Dylan stopped me. He was taller than me now, so he had that power.

Before I could ask what the hell was wrong with him, he hugged me.

He pulled away and I cocked an eyebrow. "What was that for?"

"For Duncan."

"What? Dylan, I dumped him. I'm fine."

"I know. But you won't be."

And the kid was right. I'd been distracted with the competition on the island, but now that I was back to reality I realized how much I missed him.

Oh, I had my heart set on you
But nothing else hurts like you do
Who knew that love was so cruel

Duncan Carter was my best friend. He had been for years. And I saw a future with him, we'd already started making plans and I'd spent so much time at his place before All Stars that he made me a key in case I ever got there and he wasn't home.

I got so caught up in trying to revive a mediocre friendship that I let my best one go.

I mean, I like Courtney and we were close on the island but not so much now.

Then again, Duncan was being an ass this past season. He paid a lot of attention to Courtney and that hurt. A lot.

We both made mistakes.

Thinking about them really didn't help. So I finished off my drink and Danny served up another.

And I waited and waited so long
For someone who'll never come home
It's my fault to think you'll be true
I'm just a fool

And now Duncan was in big boy jail for destroying Chris's "cabin". We've had no contact since elimination and that's been feeding my "cloud of doom" that Bridgette says has been following me around.

I don't even know if contact would help, he could completely hate me and want nothing to do with me.

But part of me hoped that he didn't. Because I still wanted him.

But he probably did.

And I felt like a fool.

Duncan P.O.V.

I heard the footsteps I'd been waiting on for forever, the cop coming to release me from my cell. It was about damn time too, they were running late. I was supposed to be out by noon but someone had started a riot and we got put under a lockdown.

He swung the door open and I hopped off the bed. We walked down the hall and some of my buddies wished me well. Apparently there are a lot of Total Drama fans in prison. Go figure.

They gave me back my normal clothes and the few things I had on me when I got arrested.

Pocket knife, zippo, and twenty bucks. My suitcase with everything else was sent over to my parents' house. Couldn't wait for that lecture from Pops.

I walked out and took a breath of fresh air. They let us out in the yard in prison, but that air was tainted with felony.

It was dark but the weather was nice, so I decided to walk. Wasn't really sure where I was going but I could figure it out once I got there.

The funny thing about taking a late night walk on a nearly empty road, it gives you a lot of time to think. You know, because three months in prison didn't give me enough thinking time. And since I was out I should've been coming up with some sort of plan.

Ma said she'd taken care of my rent so I had a place at least. But my key was in my suitcase, so I should probably stop and pick that up from the parents' house first. Dad's probably asleep by now. Waking him up should be fun. Not.

There was one other person who had a key… but who knows if she even kept it.

I kicked at the nothing on the road and it brought up a cloud of dust.

As much as I tried not to, I couldn't stop thinking of Gwen.

I say that I don't care and walk away, whatever
And I tell myself we were bad together
But that's just me trying to move on without you

You know what, whatever! Our relationship sucked anyway! She was always telling me what to do and bringing me down!

Actually, no. That was Courtney. Not Gwen.

Courtney was the psycho who constantly tried to change me. The one who I was never good enough for. The one who drew up a fucking relationship contract because she needed to be in control.

Gwen was the one who made me laugh. She was the one who I could scheme with and talk to. The one who saw more than just a delinquent with a problem with authority.

Courtney was the wicked witch of the Great White North. Gwen was my partner in crime.

And I spent all of last season trying to piss off Courtney instead of paying attention to my girlfriend.

But who am I kidding?
I know what I'm missing

My girlfriend.

You know, I've dated, I've fooled around, but calling someone my "girlfriend" has always been weird for me, even when Courtney and I started going out. See, I stick with stuff like "going out" because it's less weird like that. Not too much attachment. But when Gwen and I started a real relationship, I always introduced her as my girlfriend. To my family, to my buddies. And whenever someone called her my girlfriend it didn't sound weird.

And now she's not my girlfriend anymore.

I, I had my heart set on you
But nothing else hurts like you do
Who knew that love was so cruel
And I waited and waited so long
For someone who'll never come home
It's my fault to think you'll be true
I'm just a fool

That's too weird. She's supposed to be my girlfriend. I thought about it a lot in prison.

I think she's the one.

She practically lived me anyway, so we'd planned to move in officially until we got swept up in the stupid All Stars season. We decided she'd move in after. Maybe get a bigger apartment if one of us won the million.

We were going to get terrible jobs and come home and bitch about it to each other.

I fixed cars here and there to pay for living expenses. I'd only been in the apartment for two months before we got shipped back to the island. We were going to get real crappy jobs to support ourselves.

That plan's up in smoke.

For holding onto something that's
Never ever gonna come back
I can't accept that it's lost

I felt like shit. I had acted like shit and now I felt like it. I shouldn't have been such an ass to Gwen. She didn't deserve it. I blew it with the girl of my dreams and I had to deal with it. But I really didn't want to.

Before I'd realized it, I was in the city. There were a bunch of closed shops along the street. A few fast food joints were still open. Then I saw a bar with a dinky lit up sign. "Drunken Stupor". Sounded like exactly what I needed.

I could get drunk and sleep in a park and visit the 'rents tomorrow.

I walked into the bar and saw some familiar highlights. I thought about turning around but where else would I go?

Gwen P.O.V.

I should've let it go
Held my tongue
Kept my big mouth shut
'Cause now everything is just wrong, wrong, wrong

I was halfway into my third drink and season five kept replaying in my mind up until Duncan's elimination.

I shouldn't have snapped at him. I shouldn't have given up.

He took a leech for me and didn't dump me when I puked on him.

He was paying attention to Courtney, but he'd been with me forever. He left her for me.

Hell, I'd spent time paying attention to her too. I did shut down the PDA so I could get on her good side. That wasn't fair to him.

And I know Duncan. He can get petty like that. And Scott is a grimier version of Duncan, so it did kind of seem like she was trying to replace him, right?

My jealousy does get the better of me. Like it did in season three when he was trying to distract Courtney, and we worked that out. Maybe I reacted too harshly.

I loved Duncan and he loved me and that should've been all that mattered.

I still love Duncan. And that's all that matter now.

Well that, and the fact that I needed a refill soon.

Third Person P.O.V.

Gwen heard footsteps and felt someone sit next to her but she didn't look up until she heard the voice.

"Can I just get a beer?"

Danny served him a pint and told him to pay before he left.

Funny, he didn't get carded.

Danny refilled Gwen's drink before going over to help Homeless Henry to the bathroom before he had an accident.

It took a moment, but Gwen finally managed to find her voice. "I thought you were in for another three months?"

Duncan took a swig of his beer. "They let me out for good behavior. And because the new season's premiering soon and the producers were in a good mood about that. "

She nodded and took a large gulp of her own drink.

"Whatcha got there?"

"It's called a 'The One That Got Away'."

They sat in silence.

I'm just a fool
A fool for you
I'm just a fool

Once again, Gwen broke it. "Duncan?"

He looked up at her.

"I missed you."

"I missed you too, sweetheart."

I, I had my heart set on you
But nothing else hurts like you do
Who knew that love was so cruel
I waited and waited so long
For someone who'll never come home
It's my fault to think you'll be true
I'm just a fool
I'm just a fool
I'm just a fool

Duncan finished off his liquid courage. "Look, things got really bad. Like, bad bad," Duncan said as he rubbed his neck.

"You've always had a way with words," the goth quipped.

He let out a small laugh and relaxed slightly. "I'm sorry," he said genuinely. "I was being an asshole and I realize that. It shouldn't have mattered what Courtney thought or what she was trying to do because she doesn't matter anymore."

"I'm sorry too. I was trying too hard to be her friend and I made that a priority over us. That wasn't fair to you. And you know me; I let my jealousy and insecurity get to me when you seemed to care about her and what she thought."

Duncan finished off his beer. "You're the only thing I care about. It just sucks that I always remember that when I'm in trouble with the law."

Gwen finished her drink in silence.

They'd both managed to hurt each other and throw their relationship away.

"Gwen, do you still have that key I gave you?"

She pulled out a set of keys from her skirt pocket. "Never took it off the key ring."

Duncan sat in silence, not sure what to say next. Gwen picked up on his hesitation.

"Look, I have some money. Let's take a cab and sleep there tonight? Judy told me your stuff was at your old place. I doubt you want to wake up Michael at this time of night."

Duncan sighed with relief. He paid Danny and left a few dollars as a tip. He watched Gwen hop of the bar stool and caught her as she stumbled. "Oh you are so wasted, Sweetheart!"

"Yeah yeah," she tried to push away but failed.

They made their way outside and Duncan called a cab number he remembered. They sat on the curb as they waited for it to arrive. Gwen laid her head on his shoulder.

"Gwen, do you think we can go back to the way things were?"

"We can't go back. We have to move forward."

Duncan felt hesitant. He wasn't sure what she meant by that. "Can we get past this together?"

She leaned into him. "We can try."

A/N: So I said this was coming. Not quite what I had in mind, but it's the only thing that even remotely satisfied me. I might try out some other songfics to aid in my mourning. I just need to find the right songs.

I really do love this song, just not sure if it's really them, ya know?

Song is "Just a Fool" performed by Christina Aguilera and Blake Shelton. I do not own the song or Total Drama. If I did own Total Drama, you can bet your sweet tookus Gwen and Duncan would be together!

Anywho, thanks for reading, my loves!