Set late S4- although I haven't seen it. Based after the promos featuring Sam injured & Andy with him. Only thing is: when Sam wakes up he can't remember her or their history other than the fact that she's Andy McNally, his trouble attracting partner. Take the journey with Sam as he rediscovers his life, himself and his relationship with Andy. AU.
As always, thank you for the awesome reviews for my other fics! Thanks to the regulars for sticking around & kelly2727 for her awesomeness!
Special thanks to Lindap & JH126 who have reviewed practically every single chapter I have ever written! & no I haven't forgotten the rest of you, you're all beyond awesome!
Welcome to the newbies!
Thanks once again for the nominations for the Rookie Choice awards, it really was unexpected! As for winning the best overall author category thank you all!
Chapter 1
Life was complicated, and it was hard; often leaving her to wonder if it was worth it, worth anything at all.
But the simple things like Leo's smile made her believe that maybe there was something more out there other than heartache and sadness. The smell of rain on hot summer days did too, so did the grateful old lady that they gave a stolen purse back too. It was the little things that made her believe.
Going back to being Andy McNally was tougher than she thought it would be, in fact it was tougher than being UC had been.
But it was getting better, getting easier as time moved on.
Nick was always a shoulder to lean on and so was Traci, two people that she would never trade for anything in the world. She would honestly be lost without them.
Life without them was unimaginable.
Sam had moved on, leaving her a little crushed; but she understood; so she let him have his own happiness like he had done when she had been dating Luke- only thing was; she wasn't waiting in the wings for that to come crashing down.
Months of not knowing what she'd find when she came home led to a heartbreaking reality- nobody was irreplaceable.
She had easily been replaced and it looked like things in that department were way better than they had been when she was with Sam.
So she did what she did best, she locked them away in the no-go zone, and labeled her newly established relationship with Sam in the friends category. For now it seemed like they were able to coexist in that realm.
Friends.
Coworkers.
Arg, so not how she had spent six months envisioning her life being when she resumed her own identity.
But it was what it was, and that was all there was to it.
When her path crossed Sam's she did her damnedest to stay objective, to remain neutral and it was working, they were able to harness the friendship they once had, although it wasn't quite the same.
It was the least he deserved, so she gave it to him willingly.
"So, what are we doing on Friday night? Dinner? Drinks at the Penny?". Traci, the ever enthusiast over a weekend off and Friday night just around the corner asked as they made to move out of the parade room when they were dismissed after Frank wrapped it up.
"Penny". Andy and Nick said in unison. They had grown close since departing for Dakota and there was nothing that could be used to separate their close bond, or break it.
"Okay". Traci said over her shoulder as she left them in the hallway and headed for her office.
Andy grabbed coffee for them while Nick grabbed their bags, a daily ritual that had silently slipped into practice since they were still partnered together often.
Meeting him at the cruiser Andy held out his coffee, his smile thanking her before he tossed their bags into the trunk.
Patrol was quiet, the streets taking a break as they were cut a little bit of slack from the hardened criminals that stirred things up often.
Sam looked up to find Oliver biting into his doughnut as he shook his head when Sam looked his way.
"That Brother, is just so wrong" Oliver said between bites as he passed Sam heading for his cruiser.
Sam had been caught staring at McNally's retreating form yet again by his friend and knew that soon enough it would come back to haunt him.
From the time that she had been back, up until now; he knew that he was doing it, but couldn't help himself. It was a necessity; just like breathing was.
He had screwed up and he knew that too, a failed attempt at moving on had proven that.
Yup, dating Marlo had only proven that he wasn't over McNally, that's why she let him know that they weren't going to happen even before it really got involved.
In some ways he was grateful, but in others he wondered if he was destined to stay alone and watch McNally from the sidelines for the rest of eternity.
He had spent many hours contemplating approaching her, after the whole Marlo thing didn't work out, but decided against it- the last thing he wanted was for Andy too think that she was a consolation prize, or second best, or the rebound girl...
Just after lunch, the radio sprang to life asking all units too report in their positions if they were close to Harris Street, downtown in Melrose Manor. It wasn't an urgent call, so Nick answered saying that they were seven blocks away.
The dispatcher requested them to head over to an address on Harris street as backup, and radioed back that an officer needed assistance in a search for a child.
Andy was driving, so she pulled away hitting the sirens anyway not sure if the missing child was lost, taken or in danger.
When she pulled up outside the given address she noted Oliver's squad car parked in the driveway of a suburban house, the front door wide open.
Andy and Nick approached the house with caution, guns drawn just in case; as they stopped outside the open front door and Nick took the lead by stepping inside first.
"McNally". Sam's voice made Andy jump, he was standing behind her when she rounded the door, his presence missed even though her senses were on high alert.
Andy tried not too glare at him, but it came naturally.
"Swarek" Nick said just as Oliver came into view behind Sam.
Andy looked between the two, Sam and Nick, they had this whole testosterone stare-down going on and it made her want to roll her eyes at their arrogance.
Sam and Nick had been doing it since she returned with Nick from Dakota, and seriously- it was starting to get on her nerves now. They had no reason to do that, and it was just totally a male thing.
"Clear" Oliver said as he slid his gun back into his holster, Andy and Nick doing the same as Oliver cleared the house of any threats that would need their guns to be drawn.
"We've got a kid missing in the house, around seven or eight. Male, and we need too find him now". Sam said keeping his eyes focused on Collins.
"Have you tried calling him?". Andy said before walking away and leaving the testosterone to stand in the hallway behind her.
"I've got McNally" Oliver said following her. He really didn't want to hang around with all the vibes between Sam and Collins.
"How do you loose a kid in a house?". Andy said looking behind the couch to find it empty.
"We followed a tip off and found a Meth lab in the basement. Kids been running around here the whole time, so we need to find him. House was supposed to be empty".
"Alone? Someone left a kid that age alone? In a house on top of a Meth lab?". Andy's tone spelled out her disgust as she searched behind the curtains to find a brick wall.
"They scurried away when we came through the door, someone probably forgot about him". Oliver's explanation just made it sound worse.
After searching the lounge Andy nodded towards the kitchen as Oliver carried on down the hallway intending on searching whatever rooms where in that direction.
"Some people just shouldn't have kids". Andy muttered to herself as she stepped into the kitchen.
Collins kept a firm gaze on Sam as he moved down the hallway towards the staircase that led upstairs.
It was a heated stare, one that Sam had become accustomed to getting from Collins since they came back from Dakota, but he tried to show that he wasn't phased by it. And he was only phased because he didn't know why Collins would look at him like that, and that was something he wasn't used too; not knowing.
Sam opened the first door too his left and entered the room leaving Collins to choose whichever room he wanted. There were several up here, the house was an old one and had plenty of large rooms that needed too be dissected to find this kid.
Andy shuffled around the kitchen and opened cupboards to find them mostly bare. Whoever lived here didn't even have food stocked in the cupboards or cleaning materials under the sink. Everything was just so... empty.
She lifted the table cloth and found only the floor under the table as she bent down to look under it.
Sam moved to the second room stopping just outside the door when he heard Andy's voice through Collins' radio.
"Officer in jeopardy. Need ETF... and... a bus".
Collins was flying out of the room he was in within seconds following Sam back down the stairs as Sam took off running.
He found Andy in the kitchen, Oliver in the doorway telling Andy to stay as still as she could.
As Sam tried to brush passed Oliver to move into the kitchen, Oliver's hand sprang out and blocked his path, Oliver's head shaking from side to side as he told Sam that it was a really bad idea for him to go into the kitchen.
"McNally?". Sam said pausing and looking at her across the room, taking heed of Oliver's warning.
"I'm on a pressure plate, I think. The microwave is counting down Sam".
Andy was standing in the middle of the kitchen, far away from anything to hold on to, her voice sounding so familiar as she answered Sam.
Sam squatted down on to his knees, looking under the table to get a better view of what she was standing on.
And she chose to stand on the only black tile on a white tiled floor.
He could see that the black tile had sunken down a fraction, her one foot planted squarely in the middle of it.
"Time?". Oliver called out, making Sam run his eyes across the other tiles to make sure that they were firmly grouted to the floor.
"Eighteen". Andy answered as Sam got to his feet to find Oliver on his radio as he moved out of the doorway.
"Kid" Oliver yelled pointing at the door behind Collins that hovered right behind Sam. "Go" he yelled out sending Collins running after the kid as he sprinted away.
Sam looked at Andy, her face much the same as it had been the day she held the grenade.
Stepping into the kitchen Sam kept his eyes focused on her as he took slow steps, her sudden "No" and vigorous shaking of her head telling him that she didn't want him to do this.
"Andy..." He really needed her to stand still right now.
"Sam NO". She really did not want to do this again.
She was just so stubborn! Sam exhaled a breath in frustration at that side of her coming out at a time when there really wasn't room for her stubbornness.
Sam stepped closer and stopped in front of the microwave to see the time at fifteen minutes before it started counting down below the double digits relentlessly.
Looking at Andy, Sam found a million things crossing her face as he dipped his head slightly too look her in the eye.
Oliver's voice carried out over her radio spilling into the room followed by a frenzy of activity that lit up the radio waves with units responding and all kinds of emergency services being called out.
Without hesitation Sam reached out very slowly, his hand drifting towards her radio.
"Just going too turn it off". His tone sounded foreign, even to his own ears.
She didn't even nod as she kept her eyes trailed on him.
"Sam you need to go".
"Nope".
Sam turned Andy's radio off, his hand hovering for a split second before it snapped back into his own space.
"Sam..."
"No Andy, it's just you and me now".
Andy was barely holding it together, memories of the last time they had been through this with Dov splurging across her face.
It felt like a lifetime ago.
Sam looked back at the microwave to find the time on twelve minutes, his heart rate picking up as the time slipped away.
There were no wires, and no way of knowing what she was standing on. What it was rigged up to, or if there was any way out of this.
Oliver's voice from the door drew Sam's attention and Andy's eyes as he asked for the time with his phone held too his ear.
Sam answered with a voice so wrapped up in agony that Oliver wished he could help them.
Oliver mumbled into his phone before pulling it away from his ear wearing a grim expression.
"We uh... Got the kid out".
"Good, now leave" Sam said knowing exactly what Oliver hadn't said.
ETF wasn't going to make it in the twelve minutes they had left.
"Sammy..."
"Oliver go". This time it was Andy that spoke up, her voice loud as the panic began to set in on her. She picked up what he wasn't saying too.
Oliver nodded and tried to find a smile, but he didn't have it in him. He glanced from Andy to Sam who nodded, answering the silent question passed between them- Sam was sure that this was where he wanted to be, and he was staying.
Glancing at the microwave Sam saw the single digit of eight minutes lighting up the screen, Andy's voice sounding somewhere faintly.
"Sam you need to go".
Sam's attention focused on her, his head shaking lightly as he clenched his jaw closed.
"Just you and me McNally".
Sam walked around the table, Andy's breathing changing to relieved when she thought he was leaving. Until he spoke from behind her. It made her tense up and stiffen.
"Do you trust me?". Sam asked really quietly.
When Andy answered, her voice filtered out stronger than the previous times she had recently spoken.
"Yeah, I do".
Sam's hands materialized next too her, their movements caught out the corner of her eye.
"Hold on". Sam said bringing his hands closer so that they were within her grasp.
She took them in her own, wrapping them up in a tight grasp.
"Now step off"
"What?". Andy practically yelled the word out, her hands tightening their grasp around his fingers.
"Just slide your foot forwards slowly".
"Sam are you kidding me? I'm standing on a..."
"I know okay, but you need to do this". Sam snapped, he was pretty much well aware of exactly what she was standing on, he didn't need to hear her say it. He'd seen ETF substitute weight to compensate for whatever they retrieved from on top or under an explosive, so he was going to do the same thing, with the only thing he had- his own weight.
"Sam..."
"Andy, we've got this". How he managed that to sound so confident he had no idea, even though he didn't really believe that they had anything right now except less chance of surviving than possible.
Overthinking things- could get you killed, not thinking things through- could get you killed, but the only thing that Sam was thinking right now was that Andy needed to get off the pressure plate, and out of the house.
Making snap decisions was how he had lived most of his life, but seeing her standing there like that; it wasn't even something that he needed to think about, it was the only option there was.
Andy dared not move, even though all she wanted to do right now was see Sam who was still standing behind her, holding her hands.
Pinching her eyes closed, she shut out the red digits on the microwave with the back of her eyelids as she barely registered the six minute mark she had just seen.
She tried to keep her breathing steady and stop her hands from shaking but her body was uncooperative.
Her heart was racing away in her rib cage, the thunder of it's rhythm causing a dull ache to lull through the organ.
At one point she was sure that she had stopped breathing, her lungs burning in a need for air.
"Sam...". She had so much to say, and just trying to fit it in to six minutes seemed impossible.
"Don't, just do this please? For me?".
Andy's leg muscles were starting to cramp, ceased in the same uncomfortable position for this long a dull ache started up her ankle, along her calf and began searing through her thigh. But hearing Sam ask her to do something for him, that just made her insides tighten into several knots.
"Why are you doing this? All you need to do is walk away Sam".
That was not meant to come out. Andy chastised herself for even thinking it. But she still wanted to know why he was here.
"And we both know how good I am at that right?". Sam said sounding closer than before, the pain in his voice making her wish that she could take the words back.
"Just slid your foot off as soon as you feel mine" Sam saw them reach the less than five minute mark, their time running out so fast that in the blink of an eye a minute had gone, and it was never coming back.
Sam didn't wait for an answer, he slid his foot over the tile and let it nudge gently against hers so that she would know it was there.
Andy responded when Sam's hands gripped her's a little tighter telling her that it was time, her foot edging forwards as her eyes closed and she mumbled a silent prayer.
When Andy's foot was clear of the black tile, she set her foot down on the solid white tiles, her fingers fighting to free themselves from Sam's as she slipped them from his tight grasp, like he didn't want to let them go.
Unbelievable.
He had taken her place with one foot on the tile, standing trapped as he watched her with a lopsided grin that seemed to mask sadness.
Oliver appeared in the doorway yelling out that ETF was seven minutes out, Sam shrugging in response when he saw Oliver's fearful and shocked expression at seeing him now standing in Andy's place.
"Ollie you need too clear the house...take Andy with you?".
"No".
Oliver stepped into the room every intention of dragging Andy out of the room when the microwave caught his eye.
Three minutes.
ETF was never going to make it.
"McNally" Oliver said in warning but his voice seemed to fall on ears that weren't listening.
"Shaw, I've lost the kid". Nick's voice suddenly filtered through Oliver's radio causing Oliver to let out words that shocked even himself.
"Go". Sam said, he was talking to Oliver, but looking at Andy.
Oliver moved to leave the room, he'd send Collins in to drag McNally out while he looked for the kid, he wasn't built for that kind of exercise anymore. And seeing her face, that was just maybe the only way that she would leave that room.
He nodded to Sam, who smiled back, a silent conversation passed between the two again. A muted goodbye even.
"Collins what's your twenty?" Oliver said into his radio as he stepped out of the room backwards.
When Oliver left Sam's attention snapped back to Andy, a fearful look on her face as she realized that these might be their last few minutes alive.
Sam looked down to find her hands trembling, her attempt to keep the emotions at bay failing.
"Andy, please go". Sam was pleading now, his need for her to leave taking over every ounce of feeling he had.
"I...can't". Her hand moved up to swipe away soft fallen tears as she looked at the floor before looking back at him "not even for you".
That probably sounded so random, but even though he was asking her to leave, she couldn't.
Sam looked at the seconds ticking by and then back at her with one thought left lingering in his mind.
It was the thought that he would determine when and how he died, when he would give up; and right now he wasn't ready to do that.
Andy had one hand on her hip, the other over her eyes, blocking everything out of view, including him. The harsh reality of life out of their control making her try and hide the ugly sight behind a hand made of creamy flesh.
Sam took a deep breath before making a decision that would effect their lives one way or the other. One split second that held their lives in the balance because she was too damned stubborn to walk away when it mattered, when she had too.
Letting out the long breath, swallowing everything he still wanted to say to her; Sam took one last look at Andy before lunging at her.
*****Thanks for reading, let me know what you think! Want more?
***AN from Kelly2727: she will be posting soon, real life is a little hectic, so she asked me to let you all know that it's in progress!
Have an awesome day!
Jelly Bean Jenna©