Prompts:
1 (quote) "The night is dark and full of terrors." - Melisandre, A Song of Ice and Fire
4 (poem) 'The Impulse' by Robert Frost
14 (dialogue) "I'm too old to start again."
Helpers who gave me ideas for the fic and helped make this oneshot into what it is now:
Story Please, corvusdraconis, Sehanine, Serpentine13 and Whimsical Acumen.
Note:
I'm writing in British English, which differs from American English. So I write 'mouldy' instead of 'moldy', 'colour' instead of 'color', and so on. Just so you know those are not mistakes and are in fact meant to look like that.
Pairing:
Sirius/Remus
-x-x-x-
Remus, James, Peter and Sirius were gathered in a remote part of the castle, away from prying eyes. The night before had been a full moon and somehow the transformed Remus had managed to escape the Shrieking Shack, despite the numerous spells placed on it to keep him in. He'd woken up that morning naked and confused in the middle of a forest clearing. As far as he knew, he had spent the night gallivanting through the Forbidden Forest as a wolf.
It had been a close call, and it could have been so much worse.
In the end, the werewolf hadn't encountered anyone during his unexpected bout of freedom, and as far as the others were concerned, nothing else mattered.
Unfortunately, Remus didn't see it that way.
"It's not the end of the world!" Peter said reassuringly.
Remus raised his head to glare at Peter with reddened eyes. "I could have killed someone! I'm lucky the wolf spent the night in the woods instead of getting close to the castle!"
"But you didn't kill anyone!" said James. "Instead of focusing on something that didn't happen, we should focus on ways to prevent it from happening in the first place!"
"I'm a murderer waiting to happen," muttered Remus. "If it didn't happen last night, then it'll happen one day. It's inevitable."
"Don't be so dramatic!" Sirius pushed himself off of the wall he'd been leaning against and put a comforting hand on Remus' shoulder. "Nobody died. I'm sure there is a way to keep you restrained better next time so you won't go on any rampages."
Remus didn't answer. He just hunched his shoulders in self-defeat.
"Is there anything we can do?" asked Peter gently. "Other werewolves probably have ways to solve this. Do you know if they all chain themselves up during the full moon? Maybe they have other means to stop themselves from attacking people?"
Remus didn't look comfortable with discussing it, his eyes darting around as though he were afraid that someone could find them at any moment.
"If I had the company of an animal during the full moon, then I'd have company and wouldn't try to escape." He paused. "Well, the wolf wouldn't try to escape."
"That's easy," said Sirius. "We can just put Ursa with you in the Shrieking Shack during the full moon, and the problem will be solved!" Remus cringed, thinking of the effect he would have on Sirius' beloved pet if she were to see him transformed.
"It won't work," responded Remus with gritted teeth. "She's just a cat. Unintelligent animals will either run away when faced with a huge wolf, or they'll try to attack me. I would need to get a special pet that's been trained to not be afraid. It takes years to teach an animal not to run from a werewolf."
Sirius nodded slowly. "So… you need an animal that won't run, and that will play with you."
"That's it. Since that's not exactly possible, then the best thing to do is to strengthen the charms on the Shrieking Shack, and hope they'll hold next time."
"It must be horrible to have to go to that mouldy old place every month," said Sirius.
"I'm used to it," Remus replied. "Besides, if I didn't have the Shrieking Shack to go to then I wouldn't have lasted one year at school, let alone five."
Peter's expression, which had been rather thoughtful until now, brightened. He grinned. "Hey, now that I think of it, you're really old in dog years, aren't you Remus! You'd be, what, eighty years old?"
James rolled his eyes. "We're old in dog years too, Peter."
"No, I mean Remus is the only one who turns into a canine, so it would only really count for him, wouldn't it."
Remus grinned. "That means you're all youngsters next to me. You'd better not leave me for people your age; I'd have to make friends once more. I'm too old to start again. An old dog like me has better things to do." He smiled at the joke.
At the time, he wasn't seriously thinking that they'd leave him.
Remus noticed that his friends were withdrawing from him almost immediately. They stopped spending as much time with him. Whenever he'd approach them while they were talking amongst themselves, they'd immediately stop speaking and look at him guiltily. If he tried to converse with them, they'd say whatever they could to shut down the conversation and leave.
At first, Remus didn't understand. Eventually, however, he had to admit to himself that they were keeping secrets and avoiding him. After a few days of feeling spurned, he finally realized he wasn't wanted anymore.
Evidently, he thought, they'd been more affected than they'd let on. When he'd spoken with them about it, they'd seemed positive and they had been the ones cheering him up, and yet now he was being ignored. They must simply be too afraid to tell him to his face that they'd hit their limit, and couldn't be friends with a werewolf. Yes, he decided, they were obviously trying to spare his feelings by slowly distancing themselves from him.
At some point, he even noticed they each had a Mandrake leaf in their mouth for a whole month. It was probably for some prank, but as they'd been ignoring Remus, they didn't let him in on the joke.
Even though he kept telling himself that he'd be fine, that he was used to being lonely, Remus was miserable without his friends. He found himself filled with anger and disappointment. He was angry because the loyalty of his friends had been so fleeting. He was even more disgusted with himself because he'd always known it was only a matter of time before they realized what a monster he was and abandoned him. It had been foolish of him to hope that they'd stay.
The night of the next full moon, the others retired to their dorm room after a couple of minutes before leaving him alone to wait for Madam Pomfrey. Remus tried not to think about how they'd usually stay with him until the Mediwitch arrived to walk him down to the Shack.
In an attempt to ease the loneliness, Remus turned to finding solace in the writings of Muggle authors and poets. Maya Angelou, Emily Dickinson, Charlotte Brontë, James Stephens, and Robert Frost became his loyal friends. One poem in particular seemed to mirror his wolf's desire to run free in the forest; "The Impulse" by Robert Frost laid it plain. Freedom of the forest called to the wolf with its silent allure, and he had no doubt that his wolf, if allowed, would gladly flee into the night to escape both civilisation and the humans that lurked within its embrace, like the woman in the poem. As each day passed without the once familiar comfort of his friends, he attempted to bury himself even more deeply in literature.
Two months after the fateful night the werewolf inside him had escaped the Shrieking Shack, he returned to the place where he spent each full moon, and was surprised to find all of his friends there.
"Are you crazy? What are you doing here?!" he shouted.
Sirius smiled proudly. "Just you wait, Wolfy-pants! We've got a surprise for you!"
Remus fought the urge to rip out his hair in frustration. While part of him was pleasantly surprised to see his friends after two months of forced solitude, he knew that his transformation would begin any minute. Surprises be damned, he preferred his friends alive.
"Are you mad?! You're going to get killed! Leave before it's too late!"
"Listen, we're here for a good reason," announced Sirius, raising his hands in a conciliatory gesture. "You know what Filch always says: 'the night is dark and full of terrors.' And the guy has a point. There are vampires, flesh-eating sprites, trolls, and many other beasts that could get the best of us... Like it or not, werewolves are part of that list. You're left alone on the full moon because otherwise you'd attack people, but you have to know that we don't want you to suffer alone."
"It was very nice of you guys to have ignored me for two months just to tell me that," said Remus. His tone was exasperated, but in truth he was rather touched that his friends still liked him enough to come and see him. He'd thought they didn't want to have anything to do with him anymore. Now he could see that they'd just focused too much on keeping their plans a secret that they hadn't thought of what it would look like from Remus' point of view. "Now, could you please leave before I turn into a man-eating beast and kill you all?"
"You said it would help to have animals to keep you company, but that it was too difficult to train one to not be afraid. So we decided to learn something for you."
And with those words, Sirius turned into a black dog.
Remus' eyebrows rose.
"We've been learning how to become Animagi," explained James. "That way we can turn into animals and keep you company during each full moon."
"You... You can do it, too?" asked Remus, shocked and pleased. Things were starting to add up. All those weeks they had been ignoring him had in fact been spent learning how to do this in order to surprise him? "So that's why you've been so secretive lately?"
James winced. "I thought we'd been discreet and that you hadn't noticed. Yeah, we spent a long time learning how to do this."
"Could you show me?" asked Remus, looking at James and Peter.
Sirius was sitting down near Remus, tail wagging. Remus couldn't resist scratching the dog's head. Sirius rubbed against his trousers and raised a forelimb towards his friend, as if to greet him. Remus grabbed the paw, and was surprised by how soft it was.
It felt very strange. He had a hard time seeing the dog as his friend, despite the fact that he'd seen the transformation himself.
"On three?" asked Peter.
James nodded.
"One… Two… Three… Go!"
Like Sirius, their bodies began changing. Antlers grew from James' head and his legs changed their shape, while Peter gained a long tail and fur on his body.
And then it stopped, and they were stuck halfway between human and animal.
Sirius had managed the transformation easily enough, but the two others had failed to make it to the end.
Remus snickered. "You look ridiculous."
"Shut up," said James, struggling under the weight of his antlers. He was very unsteady on his legs, which had been changed into the limbs of a deer. He had long legs ending in two-toed hooves and was clearly having trouble keeping himself from losing his balance.
"You ruined the whole experience by not managing to transform as well as Sirius," joked Remus. "You were a bit cocky to believe you could manage such complicate magic in barely two months, Mister Prongs."
James didn't seem very happy with the nickname, but he stayed silent.
Sirius the dog took a few steps back to have some space and then turned back into Sirius, who smiled charmingly.
"Do Peter and I get nicknames, too?"
"How could I forget you two?" asked Remus. "You need names to show off how great you are. Hmmm…" He narrowed his eyes as he thought of something appropriate.
Sirius and Peter leaned forward.
"Ah! I know." Remus grinned. "To go with your forms, I'll call Peter 'Rat-face' and Sirius will be 'Bitch'."
James laughed. "Those names are perfect."
"Aww, you're so mean," Peter whined, his tail shifting behind him.
"Don't we get better nicknames? Give us something else, please?" begged Sirius, pouting dramatically.
At that moment Remus finally took proper notice of Peter's tale.
"Merlin's beard! Your tail is so gross! It's wriggling by itself!"
"It's like it has a life of its own," said Sirius, leaning away from the tail.
"It's a worm!" James joked.
Sirius laughed. "He has a worm for a tail!"
"Then what better name than Wormtail?" proposed Remus.
Sirius elbowed Peter, who looked about to protest. "Don't complain. It's better than 'Rat-face'."
"And as for Sirius..." Remus continued. The only thing he could think of was 'Blackie' because of the dog's black fur. Unfortunately, Sirius would not appreciate a nickname that reminded him of his surname and the family who had treated him horribly as a child.
Remus thought of the paws Sirius had had while in his dog form, and decided on a nickname to go with that. "You're Padfoot."
Sirius grinned, and Remus was faced with the charming confidence that made Sirius so popular with girls. He swallowed, feeling suddenly uncomfortable.
However, it took a few seconds for him to realize that he wasn't feeling uncomfortable due to Sirius' smile, but because his body was preparing to transform.
His left leg cracked violently as the bone broke in several parts and because putting itself together again to form a longer thigh. He cried out in pain. The arches of his feet were elongating as his toes twisted and reshaped into paws. He began screaming in agony. That was the infamous screaming that had given this place the name of the 'Shrieking Shack'.
Sirius swiftly turned into a dog so that he wouldn't be attacked, while James and Peter looked like they were desperately trying to finish their Animagus transformation.
Peter managed to change his face into a more rodent-like shape, while James had grown fur.
Unfortunately, they hadn't managed to complete the transformation.
"Please…" Remus whimpered, tears welling up. "RUN!"
The last thing Remus remembered was Sirius barking while James and Peter panicked in the background as they tried to change into their animal forms.
Remus woke up the next morning feeling like he'd had a particularly rigorous physical education class. All of his muscles had cramps, and while he tried to raise his head and sit up, his body protested. He was too weak to move.
His brain was still quite fuzzy, so it took him a few seconds longer than it should have to remember the events of the night before. The fact that he'd been seconds away from becoming a man-eating best and devouring his friends before his memory had blanked out on him filled him with a cold sense of dread.
Were they dead? Had his worst fears come true? Had he killed someone? He'd never thought it would be his friends. Even in his worst nightmares, it had never been his friends lying on the floor, covered in blood.
He twisted his head to the side. He was still in the Shrieking Shack, and he could see Sirius lying next to him, in his dog form.
Feeling every one of his muscles protest, Remus raised an arm and gently shook the body of his friend to wake him up.
It took a few tries, before the dog yawned, revealing sharp teeth, and opened his eyes. When he saw Remus, the dog transformed back into Sirius.
"Hey," murmured Sirius, placing an arm around Remus' shoulders.
"Are the others alright?" asked Remus.
Sirius nodded. His eyes were half-lidded, and he had horrible bed hair. He looked seconds away from falling asleep again. "They made it just in time. Look over there, Remus." Sirius pointed to the left.
Remus managed to turn his head enough to notice a stag lying in the middle of the room, cuddling with a small rat. They were sleeping.
His anxiety melted away. "I'm glad they're fine."
He felt so incredibly thankful and humbled to know that his friends had worked so hard to become Animagi just to keep him company. He thought back on those poems he'd been reading about loneliness, and how convinced he was that they all applied to him. Now, he realized that he'd deluded himself all along and had underestimated his friends and their loyalty.
Sirius' arm curled around Remus and dragged him closer. "You know, you gave us nicknames, but you forgot to give one to yourself."
"You can't give yourself a nickname," whispered Remus. "It has to be someone else who gives it to you."
"You aren't an Animagus, but you do have an animal form. So for me, you'll be Moony."
"What, because I'm a werewolf? You don't have a lot of imagination, do you?"
Sirius' other arm came forth and he drew Remus into a hug. "The word 'moony' also means you're full of romantic feelings."
Remus began to realize what Sirius was hinting at. "What if I'm not? I've never really thought about those things." He'd never been interested in girls, and usually preferred reading poetry or spending time with his three closest friends.
Sirius' hold tightened. "I'm moony for you, and I hope you will be, too."
The turn of phrase was so surprising that Remus laughed. "You're so cheesy."
Sirius snorted. "I wouldn't be myself if I wasn't."
Just then, a mouldy pillow smacked them both in the face.
Peter stood at the opposite end of the room in human form, glaring at them. "You can confess your eternal love to each other later, when it's not so bloody early. It's Saturday, and some of us want to sleep. Now quit talking."
With that, he lay down on the old, dusty sofa and closed his eyes.
Sirius and Remus were left with their fingers interwoven together in the darkness.
