This is a story written by request by F. T. L Everdeen Holmes, it's quite different from what I usually write, so I hope it's ok! It's based during the first few episodes of series 5, so beware for spoilers!
The story is about Mordred as a Knight of Camelot, but he's having doubts about whether he made the right decision, and an encounter with a mysterious Druid girl might just change everything.
Reviews much appreciated :)
Reflection in the Rain
"You look troubled Mordred, don't worry, the chances of us being killed this afternoon are fairly low!"
Gwaine's cheery voice interrupted Mordred's thoughts, and he looked up and smiled at his fellow Knight, but said nothing. It was the very presence of these Knights that was troubling him. Every time he looked into their eyes, saw their smiling faces, he couldn't work out if they were friends or enemies. His head was telling him this was the right path to take, his heart was telling him he should be with Morgana, the woman who was the closest person she had to a mother, the only person who was ever pleased to see him, and someone who desperately needed help.
And their particular mission into the forest was not helping his conflicted mind. There had been reports of bandits patrolling the forest, destroying a Druid village.
Had Arthur sent them out to stop the bandits? Or had he sent them out to make sure the Druids had left Camelot's land? Was it both? The Druids did not deserve to come under yet more attack, they were peaceful people, Mordred knew that.
Arthur was not his father, and yet when it came to magic Mordred was constantly reminded that there were too many similarities between them.
But he had made his decision, he had been welcomed into this Camelot circle, he had chosen Arthur's life over Morgana's, he was a Knight of Camelot.
The Knights fell quiet as they stepped deeper into the forest, the horses left behind on the edge of the trees, all the men's eyes and ears alert for any hostile presence. Mordred briefly wondered if he was a hostile presence. If they knew what he truly was, he may be a friend of Camelot, but Camelot would not be a friend of his.
These thoughts lead Mordred gradually away from the other Knights of Camelot and further into the forest. He wanted to get away from the people who could well turn against him, he needed time to think. But when their voices faded away he turned to see nothing but thick trunks, low hanging branches and bright green leaves of the forest and he felt horribly alone.
However Mordred kept walking, the only sound being dried leaves crunching underfoot, but then he heard voices. At first Mordred thought the other Knights had caught up with him, but he realised he didn't recognise these voices. Their voices were a lower pitch than the Knights, and were harsh, aggressive. Then there was another voice, a female's. Mordred froze. At first he couldn't tell what they were saying, but as he crept closer he a few of their words drifted to his ears.
"Where are the others?" Said a man's voice, not far off from where Mordred was standing.
"I'm the only one left," replied the female voice. She sounded afraid, yet determined. She was standing her ground, she was not going to let these men, who must be the bandits, know that she was scared.
"So they all went and left you behind?" Spoke the same man again, a mocking tone in his voice.
"I don't believe her," said another man. Mordred found himself creeping forward towards the voices, he suddenly realised he was on the top of a slope, and when he looked down he could just about see through the trees a group of four huge figures surrounding a smaller one in a loose circle. Four bandits and one girl.
There were standing in a clearing, and there was little evidence that any other people had been there, apart from a scorched area of ground where a fire must have once stood. Perhaps this was where the Druids had been staying, by what little remained they clearly didn't want anyone to know that they were there, and yet they had left one of them behind.
The smaller figure, the girl, turned towards the man who had spoken. "You can search this whole forest if you don't believe me, I don't care if you waste your time, but they've already gone."
There was a pause, the men were clearly trying to work out if the girl was trying to protect her people or telling the truth.
Whatever was going through their minds, they seemed to reach the same conclusion.
The first man spoke again. "One Druid girl is better than none. They may have abandoned you, but I wonder how greatly someone would reward us if we brought a powerful witch to their door..."
Now the girl sounded scared. "You wouldn't...there's no point...I would never be of any use to you..."
But the men weren't listening, they had begun advancing on her from all sides. She was trapped. "A pretty face like that? I'm sure we could fetch a good price whatever we decide to do with you..." The first man said, drawing his sword.
"NO!"
Before Mordred thought about what he was doing, he had thrown himself down the slope, his own sword drawn, and charged down the slope towards the four bandits, who he took completely by surprise, but they still had time to draw their weapons too.
The first man Mordred encountered he knocked down immediately, smacking him over the head with the flat side of his sword. The man fell with a grunt, the dagger he had been clutching fell out of his hand.
Mordred hardly had time to pause when another man came running towards him, sword raised and his furious cry echoing off the trees. But the man didn't expect what Mordred was going to do next, they never did.
Thrusting out his hand, a sudden invisible burst of energy threw the man high into the air and against a nearby tree. He lay there motionless, and Mordred hadn't even risen his sword to him.
The last two men weren't going to be as easy however. In fact Mordred didn't even know that one of them was standing behind him, until the Druid girl shouted. "Look out!"
Mordred turned just in time to defend himself against a blow from the bandit's sword. It was the first man who had spoken. His face was contorted into one of rage, his dark brown eyes filled with hate and he was almost foaming at the mouth. He was so close Mordred could smell his repulsive breath and see the bits of food in his tangled brown beard. There was a terrible clash of metal on metal as their swords met, and Mordred felt the great force of the brutish man pushing him backwards. It took great effort to throw him off.
But there was another man still standing, who Mordred now had his back to. He turned around just in time to see this man - smaller than the first with very short, black hair and piercing green eyes - raise his sword to place a blow, and Mordred was just about to use magic to defend himself, when the Druid girl leapt into view. She had picked up the dagger one of the bandits had dropped, and was now using it to try and defend Mordred against the bandit.
At first the black-haired bandit was taken by surprise at her sudden appearance, and she was swift with the knife, he found himself trying to defend himself from her, giving Mordred time to turn back to the bearded bandit and finish him off.
Now there was one bandit left standing, still fighting with the Druid girl. Mordred couldn't help but stop and stare as he watched the girl knock the sword from the bandit's hand with the dagger. The look on the man's face was priceless, while the Druid girl grinned with surprise and relief.
But she had let her guard down, and this bandit wasn't going to play nicely.
Before she could react the man launched himself on the Druid girl, elbowing her in the face and causing her to fall to the ground with surprise and shock. The last bandit picked up his sword again.
"Yn ol!"
The final bandit was suddenly tossed into the air with a cry and crashed back down to the ground a few metres away, his head smashing on a rock. He fell silent.
There was a pause. Mordred turned his attention to the Druid girl, who had managed to get into a sitting position, staring at the carnage around her.
"Are you all right?" Mordred asked, offering her his hand.
The Druid girl looked up at him. Mordred was struck by the eyes who gazed into his. A deep, beautiful brown , and despite just being attacked by the group of men, there was still a spark in them. She had black hair, that was mixed with a different colour, which Mordred realised as she turned her head in the sun, blue. On the top of her left arm was the symbol of the Druid. She gave a brave smile as she took Mordred's offering and he helped pull her back onto her feet.
"I'm fine," she said, though she sounded a little shaken, and her cheek was already bruising from where she had been struck. "Thank you...for doing that." She looked around at the bodies lying in the clearing. There was worry in her eyes, Mordred wondered if she was worrying because she thought they might get up at any minute, or the fact they could be dead.
"What's your name?" Mordred couldn't help but ask.
The girl turned back to Mordred, and seemingly for the first time spotted that he was wearing Camelot uniform. "I should go..." she said quickly, "thank you again, I don't know how I would have got out of that alone." She started to walk away.
"Wait!" Suddenly Mordred found him clutching the girl's arm, "don't go!" He blurted out. She looked surprised by this, and he quickly let go of her arm. He tried to think of an excuse to let this beautiful girl disappear from his life as quickly as she had appeared. "At least let me help you get somewhere safe, there could be others around."
The girl hesitated, her eyes fell of Mordred's uniform as well. He could understand her confusion, he should be an enemy, yet he had just saved her life and even used magic doing so. This was not normal for a Knight of Camelot. But then she looked up into his eyes again and managed to smile. "All right then."
And that was how Mordred found himself walking alone through the forest with a mysterious Druid girl.
"So, what's your name?" He asked, suddenly feeling a little shy.
"Gina," replied the Druid. "What's yours?"
"Mordred."
"Have you been a Knight of Camelot for long?" Gina asked.
Mordred hesitated, "No, not long." He said eventually.
The girl looked at him intently for a few moments, Mordred could feel himself going pink. He had never gone pink before. "You don't sound very sure," she pointed out.
Mordred shrugged, "I just...don't feel like a Knight of Camelot yet," he admitted.
Gina looked down at the ground, kicking at the leaves around her feet as they walked. "You feel like you don't belong."
"I suppose not..." Mordred said slowly. "In fact I don't think there's anywhere I've really strongly felt like I belong...and I have no idea why I just told you that." He admitted.
What he didn't say was the only time he felt truly safe and happy was when he was under the protection of Morgana as a young boy. She was the closest thing he had to a mother, she cared for him, she had looked after him, she was different and afraid like him. But many things had changed since then, Morgana was no longer an ally...was she?
The girl gave a small chuckle. "Don't worry, I've not really felt like I've truly belong anywhere either."
Mordred decided to push aside his thoughts on Morgana and focus on Gina. "In what way?" He asked.
Gina shrugged, "No real family, the Druids try to make me feel welcome, but I know they're cautious of me. But they know there's something different about me, something they can't put their finger on, and it scares them."
Mordred didn't quite understand, this girl didn't seem any different from the Druids he had met in his life. But perhaps it was because they were both different. He too had been shunned by his kind, even though they didn't mean to do so. They were scared of the unusual which had the potential to be dangerous.
"I lived with Druids for a while, they took care of me, but like you say, there was something about me that they didn't like. And whoever I lived with, we ended up falling into danger. Living too close to Camelot and Uther's hatred. In the end I found myself alone..." He said, but then wasn't sure how to continue.
"And then the wilderness became your only friend."
Mordred stared at Gina, who went a little pink and stared at the ground. "How did you know?" He asked.
But she just shrugged. "I know how you feel, that's all." She tried to change the subject. "You say you suffered because of Uther's hatred, but now you are working for his son, why?"
It was Mordred's turn to shrug. "After an encounter with Arthur a few weeks ago I realised who was living in the wrong and who in the right, so I joined his side. I ended up saving his life in the end, and in return he knighted me, and now I work for him...but it was a big sacrifice I made for him. One of the few people in the world who cared about me, and I hurt her to save him. Hurt her in more ways than one, and I can't turn back, she'll never forgive me for what I did."
"You don't know that," Gina tried to assure him, "Who was she?"
Mordred decided it was best not to say. How much did this Druid girl know about Morgana, and the havoc she had been causing over time? Striking fear into the hearts of so many. "It doesn't matter who, I just wonder if I made the right decision sometimes, siding with Arthur. I still have to hide who I really am. I've been hiding for so long, I wish I didn't have to around my friends, but I know what would happen if they knew."
"You're very conflicted," Gina stated. "You were at the cross roads and you made a decision of which direction your life would go. Now you're wondering if it was the right one."
There was a pause, once again this mysterious girl had got it right.
"You know, it's not too late to turn back," Gina muttered suddenly.
"What?"
"Some paths in life, as soon as we make the decision to walk on them we have to stick to it, but sometimes you can turn back. There's nothing stopping you from going back to the cross roads again."
Mordred thought about it carefully. Was this true? And if so, would he end up making the same decision as he did before? Arthur had saved his life when he was a boy, he had got him safely out of Camelot. When Mordred saved Arthur's life from Morgana, he had returned the favour, they were even now. So should they really have joined forces, or just gone their separate ways? Despite everything, was Arthur still the enemy...
"I'm not sure..." Mordred confessed aloud. "You're right, I am conflicted. I don't know which way to turn, I don't know what damage I've done by choosing this path, and whether I should turn back. I look at myself in the mirror and can't decide what I see."
"Your personality is like looking at your reflection in a river when it's raining." Gina announced suddenly. "You're not quite sure what you see. It's constantly distorted, almost moving, not creating a clear form for you to see. You don't know who might be staring back at you when it finally stops raining."
Mordred stared at the blue-haired girl. "How do you know these things Gina?" He demanded.
Another shrug. "It's just the way I think about things that's all."
And when Mordred did think about it, he knew that what she said was true. What she said perfectly matched what he was feeling. How did she do it? "And what about you? What's your reflection?" He asked, trying to divert some of the attention away from him.
Gina thought for a few moments, but Mordred expected she had asked herself the same question many times. "I suppose like a raindrop balancing off a leaf, a little too far away for anyone to clearly see."
"So while you can see who people really are, people find it hard to make sense of you?" Mordred said.
Gina nodded, and Mordred stopped himself from saying he now realised why she couldn't find a real home. It would definitely unnerve some people. But although the words from this girl had surprised him, he still felt comfortable around this girl, even though he was afraid what she might discover beneath his skin.
Did she know that he had tried to kill people, including the person who had cared for him when he was a child? When it stopped raining, would everyone see a sorcerer who was a murderer? What would people think of him then?
But on the other hand, he could always turn back like she said...
Mordred realised the two of them had fallen silent, lost in thought as they walked along, so he picked up the conversation again, diverting from their secrets and reflections, and instead talking about their lives when living with Druids, their times in childhood when they had the chance to be careless and carefree, the times they accidentally used magic and it lead to embarrassing consequences. The silent forest was soon filled with two people chatting and laughing, as if they had known each other for years, and didn't have a care in the world.
But the atmosphere didn't last long.
Suddenly, the two of them heard other voices, and footsteps approaching between the trees. At first Mordred was afraid it would be more bandits, but then he recognised the voices and caught sight of blood-red cloaks. It was only the other Knights.
But Gina wasn't so comforted by this.
"I should really go," she said suddenly.
"Why?" Mordred asked, turning to her. He realised how pale she had suddenly become, her eyes were wide and she was backing away slowly. "What's the matter?"
"They may be your friends, but they're not mine." Gina said, there was fear in her voice.
Mordred looked back towards the trees, the Knights would be appear soon. "They won't hurt you," he tried to assure her.
But Gina shook her head. "They'll know who I am. There are only Druids and bandits in this forest, and I definitely don't look like a bandit. My hair isn't exactly a normal colour either," she added, smiling as if it was meant to be a joke, but there was still fear in her eyes. "I'm sorry, but I can't be around them, I can't go to Camelot, it's not safe."
Mordred couldn't help feeling a crushing disappointment at these words. He knew it was a stupid thing to feel, he had hardly known this girl for half a day. But there was a connection between them, they were both outsiders with magic trying to make sense of the dangerous world. And she was very pretty. It wasn't often Mordred met a girl that made him feel the way she did. He didn't want her to leave.
And yet at the same time, they both knew she must, Gina was right, he would not be welcome in Camelot.
"Will I be seeing you again?" Mordred couldn't help but sound disappointed.
Gina gave a brave smile. "Perhaps one day, when Camelot welcomes magic, I can return to these lands."
But how could Mordred be on the same side as Arthur, if the King didn't want such a thing to happen?
Morgana wanted people with magic to have freedom.
If being on the same side as Arthur meant he could never see this girl again, did he really want to stay on the King's side?
Suddenly Mordred saw what Gina meant about his reflection, he could see it now. Every drop of thought, of doubt, of worry and of action, fell onto his reflected face and distorted it, so he wasn't quite sure what he could see. He didn't know what he wanted to see.
Mordred was suddenly drawn out of his thoughts when he realised Gina was trying to creep back into the forest. "Wait!" He couldn't help but call out. There was one more thing he hadn't got round to asking her yet "What you were saying earlier, about being different, special, to an extent that it frightened the Druids...what was it?"
Another brave smile. "I can read people well, so well I can see into their hearts, their souls. The reflection I see is the reflection of their soul." Gina explained.
"But what about me? My reflection hasn't settled yet, what is my soul going to be become when it stops raining?"
But Gina just shook her head as she continued to edge away from him. "I'm afraid that's something you'll have to work out for yourself. Goodbye Mordred, it was very nice to meet you. Perhaps we could meet again sometime."
And with that, she had disappeared within the trees.
Mordred just stood there, staring at the patch of grass where Gina had just been standing. Seconds later the other Knights of Camelot burst through the undergrowth.
"There you are Mordred!" Said Elyan, "we were wondering where you had gone."
"Yeah, we thought you might have been kidnapped by the bandits or something," Gwaine joked.
But Mordred wasn't in the mood for joking. "The Druids have left, I encountered a few bandits, but I don't think they'll be bothering us any more."
"Huh, looks like you did all the hard work for us then Mordred!" Sir Leon said.
Only Percival noticed something different about the young man. "Are you all right Mordred? You look like you've seen a ghost."
Had he? But Mordred shook his head "I'm fine. I was just wondering where the Druids might have gone."
Elyan grunted, "The further away from here the better. Come on, we'd better check to make sure all the bandits have been taken care of."
The Knights continued through the forest, Mordred followed slowly behind, but his mind was far away. He was thinking about the mysterious Druid girl he had encountered, what they had talked about, when he might see her again, and whether he should still be following the Knights of Camelot.