A/N: This is a on-shot! Personally, I do not feel that Shadow and Maria have any romantic feelings in the real Sonic The Hedgehog franchise, but for the sake of the story they do. Please review! Thank you for reading my story!
Disclaimer: All characters owned by SEGA
My memories of my past still haunt me. The immense pain I've suffered from losing someone I love still traumatizes me. There isn't a day that I go when I don't ponder how I could've done better; how I could've saved her. My dreams of my creation and the time I've spent on Space Colony ARK cause me to stir and lose sleep. The image of G.U.N. Agency murdering my beloved Maria replay in my head over and over again, makes me feel as if I am going insane. I now work for the agency, what a sick being I have become.
My alarm goes off, jolting me from my nightmare, it's 6am. I look over to the other side of the king sized bed I share with another, my other half, yet the complete opposite of me. He has helped mend my heart from the loss I've suffered, and he makes me smile, a rarity for me. However the azure hedgehog I speak of isn't sound asleep next to me where he should be. Odd. I plop out of bed groggily, another sleepless night. My ears perk up to the sound of the water running. Sonic must be in the shower. I pad over to the bathroom and rip the shower curtain open. I peel my boxer shorts off and step inside the shower, invading my lover's privacy.
"Hey," I huff.
"Good morning, bad night again, huh?" Sonic asks me concerned. Sonic is about two inches shorter than me, I look down upon him, and allow the hot water to glide down my back. I choose not to answer, if he's asking me the question it's obvious he already knows the answer. "I'm worried about you. You leave for work early, you come home late, and then you barely sleep, and we barely talk anymore…" his words drift off into silence. I sigh.
"Look, I'm sorry, I'm just going through a rough time right now," I state and put an arm around his waist.
"I understand, but sometimes it feels like you aren't even the man I fell in love with anymore. He always came home ready to greet me with a smile on his face, he understood me, and he loved me," Sonic's words were spoken with pain and uncertainty. I step out of the shower and begin to dry myself off, glancing over to the alarm clock on the bedside table.
"I'm still that guy, but I'm also that guy that is about to be late to work, and I love you," I say, give him a quick kiss and slip on my favorite leather jacket. I leave the home Sonic and I have shared for three years and make my way to G.U.N. headquarters.
Once at work, I scanned my badge and entered my office. My desk is huge and mahogany and my leather chair behind it spins, which can be quite entertaining on an uneventful day. A good friend of mine and fellow agent Rouge The Bat enters my office. She looks me in my tired eyes and picks up a picture of Sonic and I that is kept on my desk.
"How are you and blue by the way?" She asks. I huff and swivel my chair so my back faces her. "Trouble in paradise?" She snickers.
"No." I say bluntly.
"You know hon, you can always talk to me," I hear her sigh behind me, "Whatever the two of you are going through, that hedgehog adores you and you are his world, as long as you keep that in mind you two can make it through anything." Maybe I should confide in her. She never judges me. But how can I admit aloud that I am half-assing my relationship with someone who loves me because the first person I've ever loved's murder has been on my mind more than usual lately? Sonic and I have been through a lot; it took me awhile to come to terms with being in love with a man, and my rival at that. We also had to come out to our friends, who accepted us with open arms. Except Amy, but thats another story for another time.
My thoughts were interrupted when the loudspeaker in my office boomed, "Shadow The Hedgehog, report to commander immediately!" I groaned and stepped past Rouge as I made my way to the commander's office. I scanned to gain entrance to the commander's office, he was waiting for me at his desk even larger than mine.
"Agent Shadow, you have proven to be a very valuable asset to G.U.N. since your initiation into our agency," The commander's boomed in his confident voice of authority, "That's why I have chosen you to operate our next mission, make this your top priority!" I nodded, allowing the man to keep explaining, " It has been recently brought to my knowledge that when we raided and destroyed Space Colony ARK about 60 years ago that one of our agents had forgotten a piece of machinery that could be very useful for us now to ensure safety of our nation. Since you obviously grew up and were present on the colony when this event took place, you are easily the perfect choice to lead this mission. You will go back in time and retrieve item #2245 before the colony is destroyed. This mission shall take place in about three hours."
"Yes, sir." I responded, my stomach in knots. As I left the office, I hit Rouge with the door on my way out. "Out of my way, bat." I spat at her. I try to dash away from her, but she grabs my hand and yells towards my back.
"Shadow, I apologize for eavesdropping but do you realize the significance of this?! If you go back you have the opportunity to save Maria!" She gasps, my heart panging when I hear my late love's name. "And Shadow, I know you miss her, because you are acting like the old you, the you before you fell for blue…" Her voice trails off as she mentions Sonic. "But understand that if you do save her, your entire future will be altered, and you will lose Sonic," She states softly, "Just something to think about." She releases my hand and her heels tapping suggest that she is leaving me to ponder what was just said alone.
What do I do?
I love Sonic, though loving him doesn't take away the pain I feel, saving Maria will. I never thought I would ever have a choice like this, a choice between who I love more. Who do I love more? If I save Maria, I would be a completely different person in my future, a genuinely happy person, like Sonic, he who knows no pain. Yet I will still know pain, for I will have left my Sonic. If I don't save Maria, and I watch her get murdered all over again, will I just continue with this cycle of endless pain and guilt? I will save her. Sonic is a good person, without me in his future he will be alright, he will fall for another. I'm given an opportunity to rewrite my past, and I'm going to take it.
While in the men's locker room, I start to strap on my uniform; a leather suit with G.U.N.'s logo stitched in the front. I strap my machine gun onto my back, and my small hand gun at my hip. I feel prepared, yet completely unprepared simultaneously. I report to my commander and receive complete directions, including where item #2245 should be located. Little does he know I will be making a little detour that could change the future as we know it. I step into the launch pad, the tech scientist wishing me luck as he types in the date and time. I take a deep breath and release. Here we go.
I race down the familiar steel halls and a calm sense of nostalgia settles over me. Instead of trying to locate item #2245 like I was assigned to, I make my way towards the common living area, where I know Maria will be. My heart pounds, but not because I am skating at such high speeds, but because I have absolutely no idea what to expect. As I reach the common room, I stop dead in my tracks. Displayed in front of me was Maria and I. I was so young, so arrogant. I knew nothing of the world and how it could destroy others, and I was blissfully unaware of the pain that would soon be brought to my heart. I stood in awe viewing my former self. Seems as if I am now a shell of my former self; melancholy, stern, and unsympathetic towards others.
My eyes flicker over toward Maria, she is exactly as I remembered her to be, blonde with sky blue eyes, and a high pitched voice. But when I look at her, I don't feel a rush to save her, I don't even want to touch her. I've come here ready to bring her back home with me where she belongs, but part of me knows she belongs here.
I was yanked out of my thoughts when the sound of yelling and footsteps is brought to my attention. It's the G.U.N. agents, I am going to be too late! I sprint towards Maria, desperately trying to push her out of the way to safety.
"Project Shadow, halt!" A G.U.N. agent commands in my direction. Suddenly, I feel a sharp excruciating pain in my upper back. It knocks the breath out of me, simultaneously knocking me face first into the metal floor of the ARK. I've been shot. I quickly try to find a solution, try to save myself. The warm rusty red liquid I know is my blood spills down my back and onto the floor. I try to muster some strength and surface myself, but I just can't. My body starts shaking, and my breath becomes labored. I look up and my whole vision becomes white. This is it, I am going to die.
You know how they say when you're in the midst of death your life flashes before your eyes? Well it does. As I felt my life being torn away from me, I wasn't thinking about saving Maria, or the emotional pain that has tormented my life. Instead all that occupied my thoughts was a certain blue annoyance of a hedgehog with the cockiest attitude I have ever known. I can't imagine not going to sleep next to Sonic every night, and never hearing him say 'I love you' to me again. I am in love with Sonic, he's the one I want. I've made a huge mistake. Everything around me becomes fuzzy, and then it is darkness.
I awake in the arms of the G.U.N. Commander carrying me towards my office.
"You are very fortunate that today's technology allows us to reverse the effects of your wounds and that Agent Rouge was able to retrieve item #2245," commander growls at me before allowing a soft smile to creep onto his face, "However I am thankful that you are still alive." He states before placing me down onto the floor. The second my shoes touch the floor I race home to greet my lover, yanking the door open with such enthusiasm I am surprised it wasn't ripped from its hinges.
"Sonic! I'm home!" I call to him. Sonic peeks his little blue face from around the corner.
"Shadz!" He bounds into my arms.
"I am so happy to be home with you, and I am so sorry for the way I have been acting recently, I am in love with you and I will continue to love you," I pull him into a hug close to my chest.
"I love you too," He smiles warmly in our embrace. I was given a chance to go back and save Maria and reverse the emotional burden that has occupied most of my life, having to choose who is the true love of my life. I made the impossible choice, and I chose Sonic.