She takes a deep breath, hands already almost mindlessly flipping through pictures.
She paused when she saw the first swim meet that one of her husbands won; he looked so brilliantly happy.
Gou remembers the day that he first appeared before her when they started high school and remembers arguing with him over what to call her.
Her heart swells nervously as she realizes that nowadays she's grown less picky, accustomed to hearing both, and in memory of him, she allows whatever without complaining or speaking a word of protest.
She stares at the next picture: their wedding day.
The beautiful dress she wore, she still found a bit too much, but Nagisa loved it and Rei assured her that she looked beautiful.
Her husbands' suits were perfectly matching to each other in elegance, and she nearly cries when she remembers that Rin walked her down the aisle instead of her father since he'd died when they were both young.
She remembers her mother's tears on that day and the way her mother hugged her during the beginning of the reception; she'd became a married woman and that in and of itself was different than anything she'd ever known.
Gou remembers when Rei first brought home dinner for them, how excited Nagisa was, how he'd excitedly tried everything including the stuff he'd had before as if they were still in high school, how his favorite was of course the bread that Rei had bought with him in mind, and how Rei awkwardly tried to feed her.
She'd rolled her eyes but worked with him anyway, teased him about spending too much time near her brother.
In some ways, being married was a lot like dating: they still hugged and kissed, held hands, playfully teased each other, but in other ways, it was quite different.
It was odd on their wedding night to crawl into bed with each other and figure out who went where, who did what, and it was definitely odd when thinking of what if they had kids one day. Do they regulate it like Rei suggested or just let it be?
Nagisa had willingly told them that if they did what Rei suggested, only Nagisa would have kids; Gou had laughed and pulled him closer, switching their position to be more comfortable.
She remembers when she'd first became pregnant, how nervous and almost terrified they all were, how she carefully went to the doctors, watched what she ate, how she dutifully tried to follow the advice of the parent teaching classes.
Their first son was a lot like Nagisa, took quite a bit after him as well, and Gou had to give up on the parenting classes' lessons as none of them seemed to work when he grew slightly rebellious.
Nagisa and Rei were there to help her out later.
She stared at the picture of them all when their kids were older; their firstborn son stood proud and tall, no older than fourteen years old, and their twin little girls that were about two years younger than him looked every bit like Rei.
Gou smiled and counted all of the smiling faces, looking at their youngest that had been born by the time of that picture, blond hair pulled back into matching pig tails.
She was much calmer than their oldest was when he was her age though definitely a little bit of a rebel regardless.
Kou stared delicately at the beautiful children: some had likeness to Rei, others to Nagisa.
Some of them were much harder to tell who was the biological father though both men tried to be the best fathers that they could be to every, single one of the kids.
Gou was thankful for them.
Her husbands adored the similarities, but yet they loved each kid unconditionally anyway; she was more than grateful for the way her husbands became fathers for each and every one of their kids despite sometimes knowing who was the blood father.
All of their kids considered them both to be their dads much to everyone's delight and the school's confusion.
Gou smiled as she sifted through some more pictures, pausing on one of Nagisa a year before he died, looking happy and peaceful and decidingly proud of himself.
He adored the little things in life up to the end and was one of the best men that Gou had ever had the sheer joy of meeting.
She twirled her finger along her wedding ring, the band that unified them all; she wore two rings as Nagisa told her that it wouldn't be fair if she just had one.
He'd bought her a spectacular ring that looked like a cheesy ring from an eighties romance; it had a beautiful jewel lined in a gold band that sparkled an almost blueish-reddish color in sunlight that had her nearly laughing at the eccentricity of it when she'd first laid eyes on it.
Rei had bought her a simple silver band with a small diamond that glinted a nice shade of purple: delicately beautiful without the need of extravagances.
Kou smiled; both of her husbands had to have spent ages in the shop that day, and she'd grown closer to them both since they'd exchanged vows.
She'd never dream of taking off the two rings not even when she and Rei were the last two living members of their marriage; he still wore the ring that Nagisa had bought him as well. It glinted gold in the daylight, a sharp contrast to Rei's silver ring.
Gou wondered briefly if they'd chosen such different ring colors on purpose or to stand out though it didn't diminish the lovely feeling that rested in her stomach now as she thought about them.
She relaxed as she searched for a favorite picture among the bunch, only finding precious memories that lit her face up in joy, not sorrow, with none rising above the rest: Nagisa making silly faces at their oldest son when he was two, the picture snapped quickly after Rei had somehow managed to make a baking mess with help from their three oldest kids, flour caked everywhere possible that day, and even a family photo from years ago that almost all of their kids were in as they huddled closer to the three cuddled close parents of theirs.
Kou smiled as she moved on to look at another page and stopped at the happy picture of her and Nagisa flirting while Rei casually drew both of their attention to him, happily making the scene much brighter.
She beamed the longer she stared at it; the sparkle in her eye obvious.
Gou adored that beach vacation where their oldest had actually managed to take a quick picture while his parents acted like such dorks.
She relaxed into her spot on the floor, too lost in happy memories to worry about how all of her kids were handling things, all grown up now; they visited every so often and made their parents' day whenever they did swing by.
Kou was only drawn away from her quiet moments lost in family memories when Rei walked into the house, home from work, and carefully stepped around over to her, ever cautious of anything that could trip him from all of the years of toys lining the floor that hadn't necessarily been picked up super quickly, and leaned down to kiss her.
She sighed in contentment as she met his kiss, perfectly happy to just spend these moments with him even as they spread into hours of looking at old photos and reminiscing about the past that while they missed, they still loved the beautiful everyday moments that clung to their lives even now.
Kou could spend every day of her life kissing her husband and reminiscing as this made her happier than she'd ever have believed when she was younger; it lifted her heart in joy, and she only grew in love and adoration for her family, both alive and passed on.