I'm fucking tired.
Physically, Mentally, and Emotionally.
Santana's a bitch.
What else is new.
I'm a bad-ass (have you seen my guns?)
She is one horny mofo (you can call a chick a mofo right?)
Maybe a nympho is a better word... what I skip math not English!
She used a fucking strap-on on me.
I know, I know.
I'm SUPPOSED to be a top.
But I wanted to know what gay sex felt like.
So I could understand Hummel better.
So I can convince him to come back to McKinley.
I swear this is true.
I mean we could protect him from Karofsky or whatever.
Go all secret service on him.
He acts like a princess anyways...
Why not treat him like our fucking ruler.
I wouldn't mind playing being the Peter Pan to his Tinker Bell.
Or the Prince Eric to his Princess Ariel...
I wonder if the fairy can swim
I bet he'd make a mighty fine mer-man?
Mer-fairy?
Mer-gay?
Is that politically correct in the land of Disney?
I mean he calls Snow White that because of her skin tone.
Was Disney a racist?
Did he even make the name up?
(Google's it)
Were the Grim Brothers racist?
Did they have a problem with white people?
I wonder what they would think of the gays nowadays.
I bet if they were homophobes Hummel would tear them to shreds.
Wow, images of Hummel castrating people is scarier than that movie TEETH.
What if he went and pickled my penis?
Puckzilla deserves no such thing.
I wonder what Hummel would do if I sent him my Penis in a jar.
Maybe he'd eat it.
Or he must use it as some sort of fucked-up dildo.
I wonder if Kurt tops...
I'd so- wait a second.
Kurt?
When did my inner monologue start calling him Kurt?
And I don't even WANT to know where it was going after wondering if he tops.
I'm straight, I'm straight, I"M STRAIGHT
Not for Kurt you aren't.
SHUT UP.
OH my G-d. I'm arguing with myself?
And when did the monologue subtitle things go in italic?
FUCK I'm going crazy.
I wonder if crazy people argue with themselves?
Do crazy people accept being called crazy anymore?
Do they prefer to be called mentally ill?
Am I mentally ill?
Hmm, things to ponder while I slushie Jacob.
Obviously I am sane.
Any sane person would want to throw a icy, sticky, raspberry flavoured drink at JewFro.
I bet he liked that just because it's raspberry flavoured.
And he really likes berrys.
I wonder if Finn ever wants to slushie JewFro.
You know, for being all over his girl.
Never mind, even Finn would know that Rachel's not that desperate.
I wonder if desperate people know they are desperate.
I mean they have to know.
I'm not desperate, I haven't been since age 12.
Okay maybe I'm slightly desperate for Kurt.
I mean why else would I want to hold hi... throw him in the dumpster every day.
And really inner monologue?
What's with this Kurt thing?
He is Hummel.
G-d, I really need to get this checked out...