The Real Trowa Barton

In Spooky's realm chibi scythe-wielding bat Duo is playing go fish with Duo, Jenny, and Vixy. Wufei is ranting about having Pink's "Respect" parodied to him and the rest are just lounging. Except for our author who has headphones on and is singing. Badly. (And no I'm not that bad of a singer)

CSWB Duo: Someone shut her up.

VJ: (yells) Time for the next song parody!!!

Duo: Oh dear.

Wufei: This had better be Heero. After all his mockery he deserves it!

VJ: Sorry it's Trowa's.

Duo: Oh boy, oh boy! Does he have to sing it?

VJ: Yep.

Trowa: (tries to run away but suddenly a stage pops up from under him)

VJ: Please, like I'm going to let you go that easily.

Trowa: Gulp.

VJ: Jenny, Vixy! Start the music!

Jenny & Vixy: Right boss!

Music: Sayonara higashi no sora e tabidatsu tori yo

Sekai wa itsu mo omae wo matte ita hazu

Flying away kaze ni dakarete toned yukitai

Flying away kimi no tame nara jiyuu ni nareru flying…(1)

Jenny: There Wufei! You got your wish!

Wufei: Baka neko! I didn't mean that!

VJ: (rubbing eyes) Can we get on with it.

CSWB Duo: I'll do the music!

VJ: Fine whatever.

Music: (Can't you see what I can't be? Let me show you!) Feelin' so corrected

Bleeding here is silence

You say that I'm evicted

One thing that's real to me

What does it mean to you? (2)

VJ: Argh! Fine I'll do it! (goes over and turns on music)

Trowa: But…

VJ: No buts! Sing!

The right music starts!

VJ: May I have your attention please?

May I have your attention please?

Will the real Trowa Barton please stand up?

I repeat; will the real Trowa Barton please stand up?

We're gonna have a problem here

Trowa: Ya'll act like you've never seen a Gundam pilot before

Jaws all on the floor like the Prince of the Stars just burst in the door

I started whoopin' OZ butt worse than before

It's their first World War

I'm throwing them over the furniture

OZ: Ahhh!

It's the return of the-

Duo: "Awww wait. No way, you're kidding.

He didn't just do what I think he did, did he?"

And Dr. J said…

Nothing you bakas. Dr. J's dead.

He's locked in VJ's basement (haha!)

All the women love Trowa B.

Duo: "Dicki, dicki, dicki Trowa Barton

I'm sick of him.

Look at him walkin' around not sayin' much

But flipin' the you-know-who."

VJ: "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"

Trowa: Yeah I probably got a couple a screws up in my head loose

But no worse than what's goin' on in my bedroom

Sometimes I wanna open my mouth and let loose, but can't

But it's cool that Zechs' is on the loose

VJ's on my lips, VJ's on my lips

And if I'm lucky she might just give me a little kiss

And that's the message that we deliver to little kids

And expect them not to know what making out really is

Of course they're gonna know what Frenching is

By the time they hit fourth grade

They got the Discovery Channel, don't they?

We ain't nothin' but mammals

Well some of us cannibals

Who cut other people open like antelope

But if we can sit around and glare and mope

Then there's no reason why me and VJ can't elope

But if you feel like I feel I got the antidote

I've gotta kill my foes

Sing the chorus and it goes

Chorus:

I'm Trowa Barton

Yes I'm the real Trowa

All you other Trowa Bartons are just imitating

So won't the real Trowa Barton

Please stand up, please stand up, please stand up

'Cause I'm Trowa Barton

Yes I'm the real Trowa

All you other Trowa Bartons are just imitating

So won't the real Trowa Barton

Please stand up, please stand up, please stand up

Heero's always gotta cuss in his Gundam

While killin' people

Well I just say screw OZ and screw you too

You think I give a damn about an Ozzie?

Half you terrorist can't even touch me

Let alone kill me

Quatre: "But Trowa what if we win?

Wouldn't it be great?"

Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here

So you can sit me here next to Catherine B.

Kuso. Heero Yuy better switch me chairs

So I can sit next to Duo Maxwell and Quatre Winner

And hear them argue over why she threw

Her knives at me first

Stupid sister

Put me on a blast on world TV

VJ: "Yeah he's cute, but I hope he kisses me. Heehee."

Trowa: I said grab your beam saber and fly out to space

I'll show the whole world how to blow up $#!* Ahhh!

I'm sick of you little girl and boy troops

All you do is annoy me

So I have been sent here to destroy you

And there's a few of us just like me

Who bust like me, who just always gotta kill like me

Who dress like me, walk, talk, and act like me

It just might be the next best thing but not quite me.

Chorus

I'm like silence to listen to

'Cause I'm only doing these things

You talk about with your friends inside your living room

The only difference is

I got the balls to do it in front of ya'll

And I don't gotta be forced to peace coat it at all

I just get in my Gundam and kill it

And whether you like to admit it

I just go kill it

Better than 90% of you terrorists out there

Then you wonder how OZ has survived this long, it's not funny

'Cause at the rate I'm goin' when I'm 30

I'll be the only person in a Gundam still shootin'

Kickin' Ozzie butt while I'm piloting Heavyarms and shootin'

But Heavyarms' ammo and guns aren't working

And every single person is a Trowa Barton lurking

He could be working at Burger King

Spitting on your onion rings

Or in the parking lot

Circlin' screamin' "Omea o korosu!"

With Heavyarms on and his ammo full

So would the real Trowa please stand up?

And put one of those guns on each hand up

And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control

And one more time loud as you can how does it go?

Chorus x2

Ha, ha. Guess there's a Trowa Barton in all of us

Let's all be silent

Everyone claps while Trowa stands there blushing slightly.

Jenny: (to Wufei) How was it?

Wufei: Not bad.

Vixy: Awesome!

Duo: (doing a funky dance) 'Cause I'm Trowa Barton yes I'm the real Trowa. All you other Trowa Bartons are just imitating. So won't the real Trowa Barton please stand up, please stand up, please stand up.

VJ: I hope everyone liked it! If anyone has an idea for Heero's please tell me. If I use your idea I'll be sure to give you credit.

Heero: (sweatdrops)

Vixy: Please review!

Jenny: Later!

My B.S.

1."Flying Away" one of Heero Yuy's image songs.

2. "Corrected" by Sevendust. From the Scorpion King soundtrack.

Later!