Before you start saying, "What the heck evil strawberry I don't even-," this is based off of the Youtube video Xigbar Won't Give Demyx a Strawberry, which is based off of The Evil Strawberry, which... isn't based off anything else I hope.
I highly recommend you listen to Pachelbel's Canon in D major as you read this lovely fic. Or even the video itself, if you're a reaaaally fast reader.
Evil Strawberry
Demyx, Axel, Roxas, Xion, Xaldin, Xigbar, Saix, and Luxord all lounged in the Grey Area, with the exception of Saix, because his version of lounging was "sitting momentarily to ensure proper rest for future missions." Axel seemed to have passed out on the couch with Roxas and Xion using him as a couch as all the others were taken. Luxord was practicing his shuffling (not really, he just wanted to show off) and probably thinking of new ways to cheat. Demyx sat strumming his sitar peacefully and albeit noisily while Xaldin gave him death glares from the seat opposite him. And next to him, Xigbar sat noisily eating a giant bowl of delicious looking strawberries, licking his fingers of the red juice after every bite. Demyx looked up from his session of sitar playing and over at Xigbar.
"Hey, could you pass me one of those strawberries?"
He strummed a few notes on his sitar and soon returned his attention to Xigbar, waiting for his strawberry. Xigbar grinned evilly, his lone amber eye glinting.
"You want the strawberry?" He dangled one by its stem. Demyx nodded vigorously and outstretched a hand to receive said strawberry.
"You can't have it." With this said, he popped the strawberry into his mouth, stem and all and chewed noisily for good measure. Demyx gave him giant puppy dog eyes.
"But I want to have it..." he whined in a high pitched voice that sounded like a cross between a dog's whimper and a screaming child.
"You're a stupid little baby, man," Xigbar scoffed, downing even more strawberries. Demyx wailed and the others gritted their teeth at the gut-wrenching noise.
"I want a strawberry!" he bawled and reached over Xigbar to steal one, who fended him off with a free arm.
"You're stupid~" Xigbar taunted, holding the bowl above his head.
"I'm not STUPID!" Demyx wailed, looking around in hopes that another member would come to defend him, but he went ignored. Xigbar stopped taunting for a moment to give another evil smile. He soon continued in the torture of Demyx.
"Yes you are."
"No I'm NOT!" he screamed, flailing his arms up in the air in desperation. "I'm not stupid ANYMORE!"
Xigbar was nearly on the floor in tears he was laughing so hard- not an easy feat for a Nobody. "Yes you are," he managed out.
Demyx began sobbing on his knees, holding his hands over his ears. "No I'm not..."
Roxas and Xion were beside themselves in stifled laughter, pounding the couch with their fists as they rocked back and forth. Unfortunately Axel was their couch, and let's just say sitting was very painful for them for the next week.
Demyx continued his loud lament. "Don't say this..."
Xigbar pranced around him with the bowl in hand. "Nananananana~"
Demyx sniffled and sobbed more. "I don't like those words; I don't like those funny words..."
He continued to wail and moan much to Xigbar's enjoyment. Saix looked ready to explode any minute. Demyx stood up and faced Xigbar, enraged.
"I'm! Not! Stupid!" His scream caused Luxord to drop his cards and Axel to pull a couch pillow over his head. "I'M NOT STUPIIIID!" The last part of "stupid" turned into a moaning that pierced the eardrums of every member in the room and nearly the windows as well.
Even Xigbar was taken aback by his outburst. Rumor had it that Demyx was bullied as a child about being stupid, and those bullies were left with damaged ears for life. Xigbar was about to learn whether the rumor was true or not the hard way.
"This won't end well."
Demyx's epic wail-scream ripped across the entire World That Never Was, shattering not only every window in the grey area but every one within a five mile radius as well. The room of Nobodies held their heads in agony, many leaning on the couches and floor. Nearby, people in Twilight Town looked up simultaneously, checking their ears to make sure they hadn't just imagined the mysterious, faraway noise. It lasted for several seconds that seemed like hours to the poor Nobodies writhing on the floor. When it ended, Demyx calmly got up from his wailing position and took a strawberry from the unattended, plastic (if it was glass or porcelain it would not have survived the scream) bowl and ate it. Xigbar stared at him in astonishment, mouth agape.
"Oh my God."
Hope you enjoyed, or else Demyx might scream at you. We wouldn't want that to happen, now would we? ;)
