Don't Close Your Eyes, a glee fanfic

Don't close your eyes.

I know you loved her,
A long time ago,
Even now in my arms,
You still want her I know,
But darling this time,
Let your memories die,
When you hold me tonight,
Don't close your eyes.

Please. I know you love her. But I am the one who is here now, I know that the first chance you get you are going to run straight back into her arms, once we've graduated, if we graduate, you are going to run off to New York, and be with her. She'll be the one to hold your hand as you walk down the street, to kiss you on the forehead to calm you, to make you laugh. She'll be the one you dance with, the one to tell you she loves you. To hold you close when you have nightmares. To watch cartoons with you on Saturday mornings and old films on Friday nights. To be the first thing you see when you wake up, and the last thing before you sleep. She'll be the one to hold you close all night, and the one you'll have tickle fights with, the one you'll squeal and jump on when you're excited, the one you'll kiss goodnight.

Don't close your eyes,
Let it be me,
Don't pretend it's her,
In some fantasy,
Darling just once,
Let yesterday go,
You'll find more love,
Than you've ever known,
Just hold me tight,
When you love me tonight,
And don't close your eyes.

I know that the two of you share fond memories. I know how you two have been lovers for years, and friends for even longer than that. I know everything about how you first met. You've told me enough times. About how it was your first day of the Cheerios!, how Sue had been hunting you down all week as soon as she saw you dancing with your friends in the parking lot, how you were so excited because you got a chance to dance and make friends with all these girls. You love making new friends. You told me about how you'd seen this one girl throughout practice, this short feisty tanned girl who took no crap from anyone, even Quinn and she was mean. You giggle when you tell me the next part. You were made to do laps because some senior mouthed off to Sue and you did them happily, but the whole time round you were running around right behind the latina girl. You say you didn't mean to follow her on purpose, but it was like fate had laid a hand and you were always destined to be friends… or more. But you giggle because she was cursing the whole time, in two languages and immediately you thought she was the most adorable thing on the planet. And then after practice after she'd scared away all the other girls in the locker room, she smiled at you, and your heart melted because you knew you'd met someone special.

Maybe I've been a fool,
Holding on all this time,
Lyin' here in your arms,
Knowing she's in your mind,
But I keep hoping some day,
That you'll see the light,
Let it be me tonight,
Don't close your eyes.

When I first met you, I thought you were kinda weird, a bit dumb. Some of the things you'd say just baffled me. I admit that maybe I'm not the smartest out there, and that maybe, I haven't exactly supported you when it came to your studies. Which is something she did. You've told me countless times about how she's the only one who understands you. I try to Brittany, honestly I do, and I just don't get your Brittany-isms. But through you telling me about her, I kind of do. She's shown me that you are a genius Brittany. In your own way. And that even if I don't understand, I shouldn't judge. So I don't and I won't. Can't this be enough for you?

I once said to you, when we were simply friends, that I was completely terrified by the concept that I could, someday, meet someone who actually genuinely wants to spend the rest of their life in love with me, and you laughed it off saying how it's not scary once you meet that person, because they make you feel safe, secure, happy. I thought you were talking about Artie, but you shook your head and said in your perfect Brittany way. "No silly. I mean Santana." I didn't understand then, I thought you were confused, but now I see it. I see the way she looks at you, and I know that she loves you more than anyone. And as much as I don't want to admit it, more than me.

But that's done with now Britt. You chose me. Deep down I know it's not because you want me, but because you know that if you choose her, that she'll stay, and you don't want that. Not because you don't want her here, but you know she'll should be in New York, chasing her dreams, having new experiences, without you. You both know that you'll be with her as soon as you can be. But for now you'll settle for second best. You'll settle for me. So please, try and love me. We're both hurting, which is why, I think, we found each other. To numb our own pain. I'm trying to help you, so help me. I do love you. I just want to be enough for you.

Just hold me tight,
When you love me tonight,
And don't close your eyes…

So please Brittany. For now, just be with me. You chose me.

Just let it go.