Feeling responsible
Becker shoots a man during his first month at the ARC, and it baffles him a bit. He has shot people before, he's been to Afghanistan. But he hadn't expected to have to do it at his new job. He was told his job was to contain creatures, to save human lives, not destroy them. It was part of its appeal not to have to kill people any more, human beings like him. And yet here he stands, looking down at a decidedly unpleasant-looking man who broke into the ARC for reasons only he knows, and he's dead. It is the first and last time Becker has to kill a human being in his new job.
What feels a thousand times worse, however, is when they arrive too late, when a shot misses its target or a bystander is trapped with a creature and they can't get access to help them. Every innocent person he can't save feels like another human being he has killed. Every time he has to mention casualties in his reports, he feels like he personally pulled the trigger. The others feel bad about the creatures' victims as well, but none of them, he thinks, suffer the guilt trips, the nightmares, the blinding headaches he gets from tossing and turning all night and, after Connor, Abby and Danny disappear, from drinking himself to oblivion.
It will take years for that guilt to stop – years and one very determined young field coordinator. Jess Parker is the first, and most unlikely, person to understand what's troubling Captain Becker, and her perseverance completely disarms him.
A/N: Alright, so this collection of drabbles has absolutely no concept, except that there's several of them, I will attempt to do them in chronological order, and they will all center around Jess and Becker. I promise there's more to come, and very soon. And don't worry, they'll get longer. This is the shortest.