A/N: I am so so so sososososososo sorry that I've been so inactive. College has been quite the eye opener these days, and I hardly have any time to write. I thik I'll be taking a semi-hiatus after this, because I really do have to focus on my school work over anything else.
This was written for RememberTheName76 and Aronku who both asked for a Jellaxus brotp. I do have to admit, this is probs my favorite brotp right next to Gratsu brotp and Erza/Lucy brotp. I do hope you guys enjoy it; it was a pleasure to write.
I make several references to my oneshot The Bombshell, in this. You don't have to read it, per se, it is a lot more clearer if you do. Not saying you have to read it though.
Hope you guys enjoy reading! R&R, please?
And all of the steps that led me to you
And all of the hell I had to walk through
But I wouldn't trade a day for the chance to say
My love, I'm in love with you
Jellal hates Girls Night Out. He loathes it with a passion, like an intense fire, no, like an inferno. There is a simple reason why such an innocent even could bring about such an extreme reaction to the heavenly body mage (which is impressive for such a miniscule affair; it takes a decent amount of effort to rattle Jellal).
This little reason happens to be in the form of a night without Erza.
A night without Erza is torturous for Jellal. Who could ever fathom that Jellal Fernandes, a mage capable of destroying the Magic Council (which he did); a mage with some of the most rare magic in all of Earthland; a mage whose powers were strong enough to be able to control Etherious, the magical destructive weapon of Era (which he also did); a mage who was able to destroy several dark guilds with little to no help, could feel like this? In other words, Jellal Fernandes is a very powerful wizard and it is quite difficult to believe that something as little as a night without Erza Scarlet could damage him so and turn him into a wreck.
Truth be told, it probably isn't as bad of a reaction as described. Jellal doesn't turn into a sobbing wreck when Erza leaves, nor does he pull a Natsu and ensue fights in the guild hall. He doesn't drink himself to death in a match with Cana (because whoever tries to challenge the card mage at her own game is a dunce in Jellal's books) and he doesn't gamble his money (because he is a sensible person).
But he is lonely. The apartment that they rented out together takes on a very dismal feeling to it when she's gone. It's empty, and the emptiness makes Jellal feel empty. The quiet is enough to make Jellal want to scream. After going through many days and nights listening to the melody of her voice, the silence is too loud for him.
He is sitting at the island in their kitchen, a hot mug of tea clasped in between interlocked fingers. He watches the steam rising off the cup and twirling in intricate shapes before dissolving into nothing. The warmth of the cup does nothing for the cold feeling settling deep within his chest. It's dark out, the stars twinkling in the sky. Usually, Jellal loves the night sky, but on a night like this, he just feels...
Isolated.
Of course, he could go to the guild hall, but he shrugs off the idea. Despite being a member of Fairy Tail for a year now (he absentmindedly reaches up and traces the red fairy tail mark on his left bicep), he feels distant with the other members other than Erza. Yes, he is close with Natsu and Gray, Lucy and Wendy, but only when Erza is around. The others have known each other for so long (family, he thinks), that it would be difficult for him to fit in. Plus, he's still quite sure they're wary of him after the Tower of Heaven incident. Jellal would bet that Natsu still hasn't forgiven him, and why should he? Jellal had done something unforgivable.
He made Erza cry.
She's forgiven him, but the hard part is forgiving himself. He'd committed an unspeakable crime towards the woman he loves, and to the people he once called friends. No matter how much time passes, finding peace with himself is an arduous task.
But he knows that she is part of his peace. She is the reason why Jellal lives, why he wakes up each day knowing that he has the chance to prove himself, to atone for his crimes. He may never wash the slate clean, but knowing she is by his side every day to keep him facing forward is enough.
He takes a sip of tea, closing his eyes and savoring the taste. It's plain chamomile tea, but the sweet taste is calming; still but a poor replacement for Erza's soothing presence.
A sudden knock on the door joggles him out of his reveries. He shakes his head, setting his mug on the counters. He rises, his mouth upturned in a puzzled frown as he heads towards the door as he reaches for the handle.
"Figured you'd be in here," a gruff voice states before Jellal has a chance to see who it is. But the voice is achingly familiar, so Jellal grins and opens the door wide enough to reveal Laxus on the other side, a knowing smirk painted on his face. The blonde mage nods at Jellal, holding up two bottles of beer.
Jellal gives Laxus a pointed look. "Laxus-"
"I know, you're not a fan of bear. Relax, I got that really pale ale that you don't mind. Now budge up and let me in, you overbearing old man."
"Last I checked, you were older than me," Jellal argues, stepping to the side as Laxus barges in, dumping his large coat onto the back of Jellal's occupied chair. The blonde sends a rather disgusted look at the mug (which Jellal finds rather harsh, it is, after all, only an innocent mug of chamomile tea), and sits down, moving said mug out of the way. The bottles of beer replace the offending cup of tea's place on the counter, and Laxus then turns to Jellal, whose eyebrows have shot well up on his forehead.
"Comfortable?" Jellal asks sarcastically, joining his friend at the island.
"To answer that question, yes," Laxus says, opening the bottles of beer with his hands, a feat that leaves quite the impact on Jellal (because opening beer is such a tedious job). "To answer your previous question, sadly Jellal, I may have been a few years older than you, but Tenrou has preserved my youthful self-"
"You do like hearing your own voice, don't you?" Jellal points out, snatching a bottle of beer for himself and taking a swig. The harsh, bitter taste burns like acid down his throat for a moment, and he sputters.
"Having trouble, Jellal?" Laxus asks, seemingly innocent, but Jellal knows better.
"Shove off, Laxus," Jellal retorts good-naturedly, giving the blonde mage a gentle shove. "Can you tell me what you're doing here, or do I have to beat it out of you?"
Laxus breaks out into a booming laugh. "You're downright hilarious, ya know that right?" he chortles, throwing back another swig of beer (his bottle significantly less full than Jellal's). "You couldn't hurt me."
Jellal raises an eyebrow. "Need I remind you that I'm the one-"
"Yes yes, you're the one who destroyed the magic council," Laxus interrupts. "But at the same time, Jellal, you're too gentle and kind-hearted now to raise a fist at one of your own comrades."
Damn, Laxus had a point. Jellal sighs, raising his bottle and taking a less hearty swig than he had last time. "Okay," he says after swallowing. "You got me there. You win."
Laxus clasps him on the back, making Jellal nearly choke on his bottle. "Told ya so, am I right?" the blonde grins. "I know you too well."
"You still haven't answered my question. Why are you here, Laxus?"
Laxus is quiet for a moment. "Mira is out with the girls and the guild is full of idiots right now, namely, Natsu, Gray, and Gajeel. I could do without the headache, so I came over here."
"Ah" Jellal murmurs, sipping his beer. "So what you're saying is that the guild is pretty much as it usually is, am I right?"
"Chaos, if that's what you mean, then, yes."
They laugh, the once isolated atmosphere turning jovial. Once their chuckles die down, however, Laxus turns to Jellal with a serious look in his eyes. "Jellal," Laxus says solemnly. "I need to ask you a question."
Jellal swallows what remains of his beer and pushes the empty bottle to the side. "What is it?" he asks, leaning forward curiously. "Seems pretty serious."
"I'm thinking of proposing to Mira."
Now, if Jellal hadn't swallowed those last few dregs of beer, they would have spewed out across the counter. Instead, Jellal had to settle for the good, old-fashioned, "what?"
Laxus nods. "Yeah," he mutters. "Cana convinced me the other day to ask Mira, but I've been too nervous to ask. Plus, I need to talk to the old man, ask him for a blessing and whatnot..."
"When did you tell Cana?" Jellal asks.
"This morning. Sorta why I left the guild hall. She was badgering me to ask Gramps, so I got the hell out of dodge."
"Why are you telling me this?" Jellal whispers.
"Because you're one of the only clear-minded male mages in the guild, that's why," Laxus snaps. "You think I'd ask for advice from Dragneel when clearly the boy doesn't know his head from his ass?"
"Thanks," Jellal mumbles sarcastically, completely in love with the comparison. "Since I'm the one that does seem to understand the difference between my ass and my head, what do you want?"
"Plus," Laxus says, holding up a hand. "You didn't let me finish. As I was saying, besides being the most sane out of all of us, I also consider you to be one of my closest friends. So please, hear me out?"
That makes Jellal pause. Laxus thinks he is one of his close friends, and that moves Jellal. After all, he has a hard time gaining someone's trust, let alone their friendship. Being "possessed" by Zeref tends to do that to someone's reputation.
Jellal places a hand on Laxus's shoulder. "I don't have too much experience in that department," he begins, shuddering at a certain memory (seriously, Erza still holds that fiance card over his head, and he doubts she'll never let it go). "But I'll do my best."
"I just- aw man, Jellal, she's just too...amazing," Laxus says, his eyes beginning to drift. "Of course, she's beautiful, but that's just only skimming the surface. Ya know what I mean, right?"
At this point, since Laxus is starting to babble, Jellal suspects that the beer they shared was only one of many the blonde mage had that night. Especially since Laxus doesn't usually, well, ramble about Mira unless he's had a few in him. But seeing Laxus talk so fondly of Mira persuades a smile to touch Jellal's lips.
"I know how you feel," Jellal says, his mind drifting to images of scarlet.
"Of course, she can be scary as hell," Laxus counters. "But Jellal, whenever I'm around her, I just feel so...so...-"
"Content?" Jellal finishes.
Laxus smirks knowingly. "Exactly," he answers. "You got that right on the money."
"Well, I do have a minute amount of knowledge when it comes to a woman," Jellal offers. "Granted, it may not be much, but I do know how it feels to be in love."
"Erza," Laxus says simply, and Jellal nods.
"How are you guys doing? You thinking of marriage too, eh, Fernandes?"
"Not yet," Jellal says. "But I hope so, someday."
"You love her, don't you?"
"Yes."
"Does she know that?" Laxus prods, raising an eyebrow.
Jellal nods. "Of course she-"
"Have you told her?"
There is a moment of silence as Jellal takes in that information.
"For the love of Mavis, Jellal, what in gods name is wrong with you?" Laxus booms. "You haven't told her?"
"I've tried!" Jellal wails. He runs his hands through his hair. "It's just, hard, you know? Every time I try and say something to her, the words get stuck in my throat and I can't get them to come out. She's the most amazing woman I've ever met, not to mention the most beautiful. Whenever she's around me, I can't even form a coherent thought. She's everything I could even dream of, and so much more. But when I try to tell her I love her, it doesn't come out!"
Laxus rolls his eyes. "Why don't you tell her what you have just confessed to me. That seemed to come out pretty easily, don't you think?"
"What-"
"You just told me all the reasons why you love Scarlet so much. So why don't you tell her just that?"
"I'm not sure-"
"Listen, Jellal," Laxus begins, crossing his arms. "There is no time like "the right time," you know what I mean? There's never going to be that "perfect moment." You have to make that moment for yourself, to take the initiative."
"I'm not sure I can."
Laxus slams his hands down on the counter, making Jellal jump from the mini-shock. "Listen, dumbass," Laxus snarls. "I'm going to clue you in on a little secret that you should know but you're obviously being too stupid to realize it. So listen closely. Women love it when men speak to them. You need to tell Erza how you feel. Just tell her. I don't care how you do it, be it written in a poem or tattooed to your arm. Just tell her. You have to tell her how you feel. You've got nothing to lose, but you will forever regret it if you don't."
Jellal was quiet for a moment. Then, "How did you tell Mira?"
"I kissed her and spoke those three little words you have such a hard time getting out of that mouth of yours- why the hell does that even matter, Fernandes? At the end of it all, it sure as hell ain't me the one confessing my love to Scarlet."
Jellal closes his eyes and sighs.
Laxus rests a hand on Jellal's back. "I know you guys have had a rough past, and things haven't always been well for you. But Jellal, not telling Erza how you feel will be the stupidest thing you have done in your life. Everything else, your past, pales in comparison if you keep your mouth closed.
"Waiting is a mistake, Jellal."
Jellal opens his eyes. "Well then, the same goes for you, Dreyar," he says, giving the blonde mage a pointed look. "You came over here asking for my advice. Well I'm giving it to you now: propose to Mira."
Laxus coughs and cuffs Jellal lightly over the head. "Dumbass," he mutters lightly. "Don't go taking my words and using them against me."
"Use your own advice then," Jellal replies, grinning. "You do know best, after all."
"Ha," says Laxus, getting up off his seat. "Very funny, Fernandes."
Jellal nods towards the door. "Scram," he says lightly. "The girls should be coming back soon and I know Mira will want to see you."
Laxus rolls his eyes. "That's polite for 'get the hell outta my house, you bastard,' isn't it?"
"Damn," Jellal says, shrugging his shoulders. "You caught me. Get the hell outta my house, you bastard."
"There ya go," Laxus laughs, reaching for the door. "That's more like it. How's it feel to be a bad boy, rebelling against your proper-boy manners now?"
Laxus just barely manages to avoid the couch pillow Jellal affectionately throws at him. The door slams shut, muffling Laxus's booming laughter as the pillow smacks gently into the closed door and falls to the floor.
They're holding hands when he hears the startled, but excited squeal. He knows immediately, and his suspicions are affirmed when he turns to see an ecstatic Mira smother Laxus in a giant hug, just barely missing the ring box in the blonde's hands.
"Oh my Mavis," Erza breathes, her eyes shining with happiness as she watches the guild congratulate Mira and Laxus. The wide grin that splits Laxus's face in half makes Jellal smile, but it is the happy look on Erza's face as she watches the newly engaged couple that makes Jellal's heart melt.
"Erza," he murmurs, and she turns to him. He squeezes her hand and sends her a silent plea to go somewhere private. She senses it immediately and nods, confusion swirling in the brown depths of her eyes as he turns and walks quickly, heading for the back of the guild where he knows no one goes.
"What's going on Jellal?" Erza asks, stopping in one of the back halls. She cups his cheek with one hand, the other resting on his shoulder. Now, in her eyes, there is concern, and the blatant care she has for him gives him the courage to do what he should have done a long time ago.
"A friend told me something important, Erza," Jellal whispers. "I was an idiot for not realizing it sooner."
"What?" she asks, a frown on her lips.
He takes a deep breath.
"Erza Scarlet, I love you."
Her breath hitches, and she opens her mouth to speak, but now that he's said it he needs to keep going, so he doesn't let her speak but rather trucks on with an almost desperate confession. "Erza, I am who I am because of you. You are my light, my hope, my reason for living. You are everything I am not, and you embody everything I aspire to be: goodness, love, happiness, hope. You are my every thought, my every dream, and no matter what becomes of us, whatever the future may hold for us, I need you to know that every waking moment spent with you is the best thing in my life. No matter what happens, I am yours."
Her eyes close. "Jellal-"
"I love you, Erza Scarlet. You loved me when no one else did, including myself. I love you, because, ever since you came back, my life has been full of love ever since then."
"Jellal," she whispers. "You're no idiot. You are one of the most amazing people in this world."
"Only because of you," he says, resting his forehead against hers.
"That is not true, Jellal," she argues. "You have built your life from the ground up, only for it to burn back into nothing. Rather than be defeated, you got on your feet and rebuilt your life, this time with a stronger foundation so that it can never crumble. I'm blessed to have a man like you love me."
His eyes widen, and she smiles. "Oh Jellal," she murmurs, cupping his face. "I love you, for all that you are, for what you have been, and what you have yet to be."
She kisses him, and he closes his eyes. Rapture never tasted so sweet, and he wraps his arms around her and prays that he will never let go.
She pulls away and gives him a grin. "So," she says playfully. "Laxus really does have a way with words."
"What?" Jellal gasps. "Wha-how? How did you-"
"Laxus told Mira and Mira told me, four days ago. That's adorable, really. I must thank-"
"I'm going to kill that bastard," Jellal snarls through gritted teeth. "He's going to rue the day he-"
"Oh just shut up, Jellal," Erza says lovingly. "Let the lovebirds enjoy this moment. And you, Fernades, you'd better kiss me right now. I'm not done with you yet."
So despite the fact the Jellal Fernandes really, desperately wants to kill Laxus Dreyar for spilling his guts, he turns back to the woman he loves and kisses her. His last thought, before his mind short-circuits (her lips make it quite hard for him to form a thought), is that he is glad he was finally able to let the words slip out of his mouth.
A/N: Opening lyrics are from Christina Perri's "The Words," which is one of my favorite songs out there. Plus, I make several references to it, as well as references to Nicholas Sparks' "The Notebook."
Hope you liked it. Tell me whatcha think.
See ya soon. Happy Writing!
-Wolf
P.S. changed my tumblr url. I'm now markedmage on tumblr.
