Notes: Still hasn't been beta'd. I need to find a regular beta. Another coda to another radio play. Still haven't decided on the next one.
Carlie Roberts reached behind her to grab Ianto Jones's hand as they disembarked from the large UNIT cruiser where they'd spent the past two days. It'd been a sullen trip back from the Trench. There had been questions about the alien they'd discovered, the loss of a state of the art submarine and Carlie had gone through hours of testing to make sure she wasn't "contaminated" by any alien influence. Once that was settled and the ship had made it to harbor, they'd both been debriefed and told they were free to take their leave. They were in Guam now, refueling and recharging after the horrors below the ocean. Carlie's flight back to Honolulu left the next day and Torchwood Cardiff would fly to Japan to begin their long trip home shortly after. That gave Carlie about 14 hours to catch up with her old coworker before they parted ways. "Come on," she urged as she pulled the younger man from behind her. Ianto glanced back at where Jack and Gwen were talking with the Unit Commander who'd escorted them to and from the Trench. Jack caught Ianto's eye and waved before returning his attention back to UNIT. Ianto couldn't be sure if it was intentional or the sun, but he could've sworn he'd seen Jack wink.
"Right," Ianto mumbled as he was partially dragged through crowds of soldiers and workers. "I guess I'll get a hold of them later."
They made it through all of the dock security points and then a quick cab ride put them into the main part of Hagåtña. It was a beautiful, tropical island city. Touristy, but clean. Americans always kept clean tourists cities, from what Ianto could tell. Not that he'd seen a lot of them. He actually hadn't really seen a lot of the world until this past year; however, he was making up for lost time now. In the past eight months, he'd been to Switzerland, Japan, Guam, Washington DC, Bermuda and New York. Since the bombings, it'd felt like Jack had made a point of taking him and Gwen anywhere that wasn't in Wales that he could. Not that Ianto or Gwen complained, unless something tried to eat them while they were there. Actually, now that he thought about it, that seemed to be a common occurrence, and he did seem to complain about it quite a bit.
Carlie found a small café with a view of the ocean and got them a table outside. It was morning, and even in a pair of denims and a light cotton Oxford, Ianto could feel sweat beading at the back of his neck. The ocean breeze provided some relief, and Ianto fretted for a moment how his skin would handle the tropic sun. He ordered an iced coffee, and to his surprise, Carlie did the same, then he rolled his shirt sleeves up to alleviate some of the heat. "You going to explain why you dragged me away like the boat was on fire?" Ianto asked as the server departed.
Looking a little embarrassed, Carlie ran a hand through her dark brown hair - currently styled in the same pixie cut Ianto swore she'd had when they'd met years ago. Short dark hair, big expressive eyes and a beautiful mouth. Then, a thought hit him in the gut and, for a very uncomfortable moment, Ianto was painfully aware that Carlie resembled a very subtle mix of Jack and Lisa. All of Lisa's soft edges and openness mixed with Jack's big presence and lazy wit. Ianto shifted in his seat and felt his cheeks flush just a little. "I just wanted to see you without everyone else around," Carlie confessed. "We haven't had five minutes alone since we were a mile underwater and that wasn't really the best place to talk."
Ianto nodded in agreement and found himself smiling when Carlie reached out and grasped his hand. Her skin was warmed by the sun, and while not as tanned as Jack's, it had the coloring of someone who worked outdoors fairly often.
"Well, I will say seeing you has been the highlight of this week."
"Oh come on, you didn't find the bottom of the ocean at all interesting?
With a shrug, Ianto took a sip of the water left at their table." "It was pretty gray."
"So hard to impress," Carlie scolded. "Tell me about Cardiff. Your co-workers."
"You just spent days trapped with them!" Ianto laughed. "What more do you need?"
Carlie didn't seem put-off my Ianto's deflection. She propped her chin on the hand that wasn't busy playing with Ianto's wristwatch. "You're a small team."
"We lost some people so the work's been more. I love them though - both of them," Ianto added quickly and then laughed when Carlie's foot brushed his leg on the table.
"He is handsome. She's a sweetheart too," Carlie commented. "How bad is it there?"
"It's as small and disorganized and we all heard it was," Ianto admitted.
"And you've lost staff."
"It's as dangerous as we heard too. Though, apparently, not as much as doing paperwork in London."
They shared an uncomfortable laugh. It wasn't a funny subject but, laughing was so much easier than any other reaction. An awkward silence fell over them. Ianto took a deep breath, filling his lungs with the salt air, and stared out at the ocean. It was so easy to forget all the shit that the universe dumped onto Earth in a place like this. It was unspoilt. Ianto exhaled and looked back at Carlie. She was studying Ianto, but there was a faraway aspect to it - like she was only half there.
"It is good to see you, I was being honest about that. I just wish it hadn't almost gotten you killed," Ianto said. He hoped that wasn't what was distracting Carlie. Experience had told him dwelling on things like possible death and creepy fucking monsters didn't lead to mental stability.
A shiver went through Carlie, despite the heat, and her smile dimmed. "That's Torchwood isn't it? It'll kill everyone involved in the end."
"Yeah."
"Ianto, don't you think you're pressing your luck?"
Ianto raised his eyebrows but, before he could articulate a response, their coffees arrived. He took a sip and tried to hide his smirk as Carlie added pack after pack of sweetener.
"I see you acting smug, Mr. Jones," Carlie scolded and waved an empty pink package in Ianto's face. "Not all of us like bitter." She took a drink of coffee and sighed. "Really, I'd prefer if you didn't avoid my question."
"How am I pressing my luck?"
Carlie stirred her coffee with a straw and stared at him intently. "You know what I mean. I know I wasn't working there when… when things went bad. But, how many people are left that worked in London? Twenty-five?"
"Seventeen," Ianto corrected automatically and winced at the shocked look on Carlie's face. "There was an incident, with some of the survivors, on top of a few suicides, illnesses, accidents, so on."
"Seventeen people. That's… horrible." Carlie fell back heavily into her seat and stared at the table. "So, you lived through that. How many close calls have you had since then?"
Immediately, images of Lisa's metal encased hands grabbing him, cannibal knives against his throat, guns against his head and claws and teeth far too close to delicate skin flashed through Ianto's mind. He took a deep breath, then a gulp of cold coffee, while his heartbeat slowed back down to a normal pace. "I've had a few. That's expected in this line of work."
"Expected? Ianto, the last time I saw you all you did was research, and you wanted to work in the Archives."
"I do that, though, in Cardiff."
"And carry a gun. And go out into the field."
Ianto squirmed in his seat. This was getting a bit too much and he didn't feel like defending Torchwood, not to Carlie and not to anyone. "We're shorthanded," Ianto grumbled. "And I like the work. It makes me feel like I'm making a difference, making up for some of the mistakes of the past."
Carlie smacked a hand on the table and snorted. "You think you need to make up for Canary Wharf? You didn't cause that."
"You're right," he agreed. "I didn't, but I made my own mistakes. Carlie, what's the point of this?"
Carlie opened her mouth, paused, and her eyes broke contact with Ianto. She stared off behind him, out at the busy street, and spoke. "You're going to get killed if you stay. I went back for three days and I almost got killed. It's a death sentence…I don't want that for you."
"I know." Ianto squeezed her hand. "But, it's where I am. I don't go back from here. If I die because of it, well," Ianto paused and tried to find a way to summarize his feelings on the matter. Death was a subject that, six months ago, consumed his thoughts. Now, it wasn't that he was resigned to his fate, he'd never lie down and let life leave him, but he wasn't miserable about it anymore. Not really. "If I die," he began again. "It'll be fair trade for all of the brilliant things I've seen."
"Are you staying for him?"
"No. I'm staying for both of them. And me. It's all I have." Carlie narrowed her eyes and, before she could interject, Ianto raised a finger to silence her. "I wouldn't change that either. I love where I am, and for the first time in ages, who I am. Any price is worth that."
When Carlie laughed Ianto pretended to not notice the bitter tinge to it. "I'm sorry. I'm still freaked out from earlier. I'm lashing out at you. Alien possession does that to a girl."
"It's okay."
"You know, Ianto Jones, I have to say something." The haunted look that had been plaguing Carlie for the past few minutes faded away and she grinned easily at him. Again, Ianto thought ruefully, just a bit too much like Jack in the way she could jump from one emotion to another. "You've got a thing for that whole boss-assistant thing, don't you?"
Ianto snorted, loudly, and pinched the bridge of your nose. "You and Jack would get along brilliantly, you know that? Besides, you weren't my boss."
"Supervisor!"
"You didn't sign my paychecks."
"Oh, but you like that now, don't you?" Carlie's smirk was mischievous, lewd, and entirely infectious. Ianto found himself smiling back and while their fingers linked together across the table.
"Actually, I sign my own paychecks. He's a bit… disorganized."
"You do like secretly running things." Carlie leaned across the table and Ianto met her halfway. They leaned forward, smiling in the sunshine, and inches from each other's personal space. Ianto had shut out so many people from his life before Cardiff that this felt like a holiday on its own. Sitting with someone who remembered him before pressed suits, cybermen, and all of that made him feel strangely at ease. Carlie may not know much about him now, but she was in a handful of people who knew his past, and time or distance didn't erase that bond.
"I do," Ianto agreed and then cleared his throat, letting his face take on a serious expression again. "You know I'm going to take care of myself, don't you? I'm not going to purposefully get myself killed. Things happen, but I'm not going to go looking for an early end."
A touch of melancholy danced in Carlie's eyes that Ianto didn't understand and he felt her grip on his fingers tighten momentarily. "I know. I just hope your little crew is going to look out for you as much as you do for them."
"They will," he assured her. The conviction in his voice was moving. He sounded absolutely devoted - not to Torchwood, but to the people that made up Torchwood. That frightened Carlie more than his stubborn refusal to get out while he still could. That, Carlie realized sadly, was the type of attitude that made people do foolish, deadly things.
"If you're worried," Ianto continued, "you could join us. Keep an eye out on me. We have an ocean in Cardiff."
Carlie rolled her eyes. "You're not that cute, kiddo." She looked up to study Ianto's face, and the close proximity gave her an opportunity to truly see it. He'd aged in the three years since she'd seen him last. He was still youthful, and his eyes sparkled, but he'd filled out. He'd stopped looking so much like a boy and more like a man. It was like watching someone overlay two images. She could still see the scrawny, smart mouthed boy who had done research for her in London, but he was blurring with this mature and confident stranger in front of her. Impulsively, Carlie grabbed Ianto's shirt and pulled him closer until their lips met. She kissed him, hard and with a touch of desperation, until he relented and kissed back. Their tongues met, she could taste the too bitter coffee on his, and she wanted to sigh and lose herself in contact with him. Instead, Carlie pulled back and ended the kiss as gently as she could. Her lips lingered over his so that they were close enough to feel each other breathing. Carlie bit her lower lip and stared at Ianto's mouth. His kiss tasted more of goodbyes than coffee or sea air.
"You'll be fine," Carlie lied quietly. She couldn't look him in the eyes as she said it, out of fear he'd know the truth. When Ianto murmured and nodded in agreement that of course he'd fine and they'd see each other again soon, Carlie's heart broke a little more.
He was lying too.
