A/N: Hi, so here is the first chapter and I hope you like it. This is my first fan fiction here so if you have any suggestion I'd be glad to hear but please, if you don't like there's no need to be mean okay? Thank you (: (REWRITTEN)

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Harry Potter. He and everything but Mary belongs to J.K. Rowling (:

AU

Fearful

Chapter 1

It was a usual rainy day in London Town and somewhere in the city a little girl was watching through the window as the rain fell, as if the weather was mocking her feelings. Mary had lived in St. Theresa's Orphanage since she could remember and she didn't know anything about her parents but she supposed they were dead or probably didn't want her, like every adult who came here looking for a child to adopt. She did not call this horrid place home, though. Home was supposed to be a place where you felt safe and you had a mum and dad to take care of you and to tell everything's going to be alright, to wipe your tears and hold you. Home was a place of love and acceptance, and well… the orphanage didn't fit in any of these categories. She had lost her hope about having a home, after years being mistreated and disliked, if not hated; she didn't think her life would ever be worth or living, or even bearable but she didn't complain. She never did.

Mary was in the bedroom she shared with a blond haired girl about her age named Chloe and two of her cronies, and was glad that they were somewhere else, otherwise Mary would not be sitting so peacefully, or as much as she could be. Strange things have been happening to her since she was five, just like wishing she had a blanket when she was cold and the blanket appeared of nowhere – she tried wishing her parents would come and get her, but it didn't work – and wishing that she was somewhere where Chloe's gang couldn't get her and she appeared in the attic, just to get in trouble, beaten up and starved for five days by Mr. Clark, a balding man who was responsible for the children along with his wife, when she went downstairs. She was used to it though; she was a worthless piece of scum and ungrateful freak and did not deserve to be treated any different.

She was absorbed on her thoughts and didn't hear Mrs. Clark calling her, only noticing her presence when the elder woman gave a sharp slap on her face.

"Don't ignore me stupid girl. There's a man out there who wants to see you and you better not keep him waiting, else he might go back and leave you here without even meeting you. We both know that these opportunities don't come easy for you, huh? Who would want to adopt a freak like you?" Her words were harsh but nothing out of the ordinary for the tiny girl who was biting her lip trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall. "And cover that red cheek of yours."

"Y-Yes, ma'am." She said weakly. She did not get her hopes up, it was always the same: people rarely wanted to see her and when they did, they always regretted after hearing what Rosina Clark had to say about her. Everyone in the orphanage hated her and liked to make her life a living hell and Mary didn't know why they bothered telling her someone wanted to see her, it wasn't like she was going to get adopted anyway.

She went to the study with her head down, hoping she would not bump into Chloe or her "friends" on her way, they would only make her feel worse about being rejected one more time. She reached the study quicker than she was prepared for and put her small hand on the door knob 'C'mon Mary Mae, you can do this. You've been through this enough to know exactly what will happen.' But no matter how many times she was rejected, the pain always felt like a new scar, stinging until the time passed and another one replaced it.

She took a deep breath and opened the door to find and man dressed in shabby clothes - not that his we're worse than hers anyway - pacing in the room when she entered. However, the moment she stepped through the door the man turned to look at her and a smile spread across his face fading quickly when he took a better look at her.

She was pretty small for her age looking like five or six instead of a soon-to-be ten year old girl and was very thin, like she hadn't been fed properly. She was wearing a dirty overall with wholes all over it and had a long black wavy hair and grey eyes, which painfully reminded the man of the one who used to be one of his best friends. He quickly pushed this feeling aside and smiled at the girl who was standing next to the door.

"Hi, I'm Remus Lupin. You must be Mary..." The man said smiling as the girl nodded hesitantly. "Why don't you sit, I have a lot to ask you and I'm sure that soon you'll have many questions as well."

Remus had to restrain himself from gathering her in his arms, after all these years searching for her he finally found her and she didn't even know who he was.

Mary walked slowly and seated still on the chair that Mr. Lupin indicated, taking extra care not to show the hand print on her left cheek. The man could clearly see that she was scared from the way Mary sat as far away from him as possible.

"It's okay, you know. I don't bite." He tried to joke and get a smile from the girl who only gave him a half smile before she stopped herself and looked down at her dress. Remus sighed and tried to get the girl to talk. This time trying not to think about the red mark he saw on her face. "How old are you now, Mary?" He knew that, of course he did.

"Ni-nine, sir." She stuttered. 'Great' she thought 'Now Mr. Lupin gave up on everything. I'm not only a freak but I can barely talk. I don't know why I get my hopes so high anyway, I should've learned.'

"Hmm." He frowned at the use of the title 'sir' but let this one slip, he would tell her to stop calling him that when they were home. "You know, you look just like your father..."

At the mention of her father the little girl looked at him with fascination before looking down again and fidgeting with her hands. 'He knew daddy!' was the only thing in her mind and she was about to ask one question when she remembered she wasn't allowed to do so.

"I knew him, we went to school together. Your mother too..." He was desperate trying to get some reaction from the girl. "A brilliant woman she was, very kind." He smiled at the memory. "You know, I was there when she discovered she was pregnant. She asked me to be your godfather..." The man said carefully waiting for some reaction.

Mary stood still on the chair while she absorbed this information. 'Mr. Lupin knew mum too!' And then she remembered what the man said about being her godfather. 'Why didn't he come before? Why would he want me now? Why is he here?'

"R-Really?" She asked before she could stop herself, she prepared herself for the shouts that were sure to come.

"Really" The man said with a sad smile. "You're probably wondering why I didn't come sooner... I wasn't able to get you here until today. I'm trying to get an authorization since I discovered where you were one year ago, but these things take long" 'Especially when you're a werewolf' Remus added in his mind as an afterthought. "When your mother died, you were sent here and nobody knew where you were. It was my responsibility to take care of you as your godfather but they sent you away before I could reach the hospital. Now that I found you I wanted to know… I wanted to know if you want to come and live with me, like you should have been since your mother died. I'll understand if you don't want to go, of course..." He was interrupted by the distressed sniffs of his god daughter, and one look at her broke his heart. She was shaking with her head on her knees, he could hear she mumbling "Stop, stop" thanks to his werewolf hearing and acted on instinct when he scooped her up onto his lap and struggled to get away. "Shh, shh, cub. Don't cry. Shh." He rubbed her back on a soothing way, trying to get the little girl to relax in his arms. After what seemed like hours for Remus, her sobs turned into small hiccups.

"I-I'm sorry, sir." Mary said trying to get off the man's lap, only to be gently pulled down by him. Everything he told her was so overwhelming that she could not stand it, he was only telling her all this to say that he didn't want her in the end, that she was a disappointment.

"Shh. There's nothing to be sorry for, cub." He said while wiping her tears with his thumb. "What about you tell me why you were crying, mm?"

"W-Why would you want m-me? I'm j-just an ungrateful little f-freak, a worthless piece of tr-trash, stupid girl. Nobody w-would ever want m-me. I d-don't deserve anyone to care for me, I'm just a b-burden, I s-shouldn't even been b-born. A-and-" She was interrupted by Remus who hugged her and felt her tense and flinch –he noticed that she wasn't used to hugs at all, and felt guilty about it. He wondered what those muggles have done to her and hoped that his suspicions were wrong.

"Never, ever, ever repeat these words do you hear me, Mary Mae? You're the most adorable little girl I've ever met, you're sweet and kind and who told you this was lying. These things are all lies! I want you because I love you since the day I became your godfather! You're not a freak, you're not!" He wiped the tears that were falling from her eyes.

"Y-You don't know anything about me! Mrs. Clark should have told you this before. I'm a-a freak, weird things h-happen around me. Everyo-one hate me and t-tell me this. Y-you don't have to d-do this just because you feel o-obligated to as my godfather. Y-you don't need to pretend you want me because you feel pity towards me!" Her tears fell faster.

"You're not a freak, Mary. You can do magic, you're magical, just like your parents and I. You're a witch and that's all. Whoever told you these things was lying as I said before! And I'm not doing this because of anything but love, I deeply care about you and I am sorry that I wasn't here sooner. But I really want you to come live with me." He kissed her forehead, quietly hexing those muggles into next week for making his precious goddaughter believe these things about her.

"Ma-magic doesn't exist and I'm n-not a witch." She said, threatening to let the tears fall again. "I may be a b-bad girl but I'm not like t-that." She said quietly and Remus gently cursed himself for not explaining better.

"No, no. You don't understand. Magic is real and real witches and wizards aren't like this witches that you see on muggle books." He saw the questioning look on her face and quickly added. "Muggles are people who don't have magic running in their blood like us. Real witches aren't all bad, not all of them. There are mostly good witches and wizards. And they're definitely not ugly; there are a lot of beautiful witches you know."

"Oh" Was everything that Mary managed to say while trying to absorb everything that she has been told. She was a witch, magic was real!

"So... what do you say, cub? You want to come and live with me?" Remus said looking down at the little girl on his lap. The girl just nodded uncertainly, scared of saying something wrong and making this kind man regret everything. A smile spread across his face when she nodded but he also saw a bit of fear in her eyes that has been there for the whole conversation and promised himself he'd make it go away. "Why don't you go get your things while I sign some papers? Then we can go home." He smiled and pulled the girl to her feet and then she walked away.

She sighed happier than she ever felt as she went back to her and Chloe's bedroom to get the few things she had and then go home with her godfather. Godfather. If someone said to her that this'd happen to her she would have never believe it, but there is always hope after all. She was scared too, what if he regretted his decision and sent her away. What if he treated her like Mr. and Mrs. Clark did? Not that she didn't deserve it, but it was too painful. She decided that she wouldn't do anything to make him cross, and that she would do anything he wanted to never come back here. She was started to pack absently when she noticed that she was not alone.

"Well, well, well. It looks like the little freak is getting adopted, pity that she will come back. Why would anybody want her anyway? She'll be here soon and alone as always." Chloe said to her gang and the rest of them laughed. Mary tensed instantly as she felt Chloe approach her. "If I were you, girl, I wouldn't unpack there and get my hopes up. You'll be handed back quickly than you can say 'freak'." And with that Chloe scratched the younger's arm and went away, leaving Mary bleeding alone on the floor. As much as she tried to stop, tears were streaming down her face.

When Remus asked the owner of the orphanage for the papers to sign, she tried in every possible way to make him give up, saying that the girl had mental and anger problems and was a freak. Only to receive a harsh response from the angry godfather who now understood why his cub said those things. When the papers were all signed he stood on his feet pacing up and down, worrying why she was taking so long.

After she stopped crying, she went to the bathroom to clean the dry blood of her newest scratch. She got her things and made her way to the study to find her godfather pacing up and down. She froze at his reaction, she made him mad and now he was going to leave her here, he was going to hit her.

"I-I'm sorry I've made you wait, sir. P-please don't be mad, please d-don't leave m-me here." She said pleading, knowing this wouldn't make anything better. If she learned something in those years was that when you beg people get madder. But she was surprised when the man hugged her. She tensed when the suddenly act of affection that she wasn't used to made her back sting worse from her last beating. Remus felt her tense and pulled her away.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Mary. I'm not mad and I would never, ever leave you here. Do you understand?" She nodded and lowered her gaze. "And I also rather if you didn't call me 'sir', it makes me feel old." He joked just to receive a nod from the girl. He sighed and held her hand, leading her through the door. He felt her tense from the small shown of affection and noticed sadly that she was scared of him. Merlin, what have these muggles done? "Do you want to say good bye to anyone?" He said walking out of the house, receiving a fearful glance from his Charge. "I'll take this as 'no'. Ready to see more magic, cub? Okay, come here." She nodded as he released her hand and picked her up; it would be easier to apparate that way. She weighted barely anything. She tensed even more in his arms and his soothing words calmed her down a bit. "Shh, that's okay. Close your eyes and hold on me tight okay? It'll be over soon, there's no need to be scared." She did as told a clung into her godfather's shirt like there was no tomorrow and soon she felt like she was being pressed from every direction and unable to breath.

A/N: So, do you like it? I love reviews you know…