INTRODUCTION
Scorpius Malfoy was just a boy.
Really.
Well, a boy in the sense of being a teenager, I suppose. Not so much a young boy.
And a pretty damn attractive boy, at that. Somehow he managed to become the most striking of the Malfoy men; a smoother face than his gaunt father's, but still more well-defined than his grandfather. Elegant and aristocratic. But with a hint of trouble.
Somewhere deep within those icy eyes a thread of mischief held strong and refused to waver. His father must have noticed it early on, but typical of a Malfoy father, turned a blind eye to the bad-boy doings of his son. His grandfather, on the other hand, was probably rolling in his grave.
The Malfoys had somehow managed, two or three years or so after 'The Battle' (as his father referred to it) to turn public opinion back in their favour, or at least, back to what it used to be. Draco wed Astoria Greengrass, a buxom, attractive brunette, in a typical Slytherin wedding (although, untypically Slytherin, it was not arranged). Maintaining their infamous wealth, Draco dove into a variety of enterprises, managing to make a small fortune off of a muggle Button factory that he took over, and then making a large fortune in magical real estate, even selling a Scottish estate to his former enemy, Potter (although Potter, being a stupid Gryffindor, innocently bought it at 3X the selling price). Whose family, to be honest with you, the Malfoys still secretly spat at. Just in this new era, from behind closed doors.
But Astoria Malfoy (nee Greengrass) and Draco Malfoy struggled for a couple of years on the decision whether or not to have children. Astoria loved kids, and surprisingly, Draco could put up with them; but Draco was convinced that he would be a terrible parent. Five years after their wedding, after a night with one too many tequila sunrises and sex on the beaches on a vacation down to the Caribbean, Astoria broke the news to a sleepy Draco; she was pregnant.
Draco, still suffering from a brutal hangover, thought she was joking.
Scorpius Malfoy was born one year later, on February 19th, a screaming and incredibly pissed off seven pounds and four ounces. (Little did the Malfoys know that Albus Potter was born two months after that exact date.) Joyously pampering her only son, Astoria spoiled him rotten (as every Malfoy mother should), bringing him to socialite gatherings where he soon gathered quite a following with the older daughters of influential families, who cooed over the adorable toddler.
And thus, Scorpius grew up in the typical Malfoy household; he had it all and he knew he deserved nothing less than the best. And in a household where there were few rules, since Draco and Astoria agreed that their son should never be stifled as they were, Scorpius grew up freely, having a fun and daring personality that no other Malfoy was ever allowed to have.
From the way he was raised, you would never have expected how he turned out. Scorpius was debonair in a way that made older socialite daughters kiss his cheeks and let him fondle their breasts. Even before Hogwarts, he was brutally gorgeous, with the infamous pale Malfoy hair (although his was a darker blond; probably due to Astoria) and complexion, and a body and face seemingly carved from marble; one of the taller of his friends, the boy who led the premature pack of soon-to-be Slytherins. His hair swept charmingly over his face, his eyes were rimmed with lengthy dark lashes, and his clothes were always perfect, in a typical Londoner fashion; his pants creating that perfect saggy-assed private school boy appearance, his top lengthily fitting his body.
And that was when he was nine.
Then, later on, the Hogwarts letter came and Scorpius was carted happily off to a world of magic, with his huge textbooks, leather suitcases, a wand of rowan 9 and ¾ inches with dragon heartstring, and a great horned owl called Harriet. Astoria cried as he waved goodbye on the train, and then turned to Draco, who cockily said, "He'll do fine. He's a Malfoy, after all."
And it was true. He did fine. No, he was not a snivelling mess like Albus Potter was, nor was he a warm bundle of red curls like Rose Weasley. He acted like a dashing prince, and even the older grades noticed it, whispering to themselves about how sexy and popular the Malfoy was turning out to be. Maybe he'd bring the Slytherin house back, if he got sorted in there.
And yes, he was sorted in there. Do you honestly think that Scorpius would be anything but a Slytherin?
Ravenclaw was too nerdy (there were a lot of pretty girls, but the males were a bunch of comic-book geeks), Hufflepuff was too loyal (Scorpius was never loyal to anyone; people were loyal to him, instead), and Gryffindor was just … well … too damn nauseating. As the other cool house (everyone wants to be in Slytherin or Gryffindor, because really, those are the noticeable ones), Gryffindor was really just too much of a do-gooder. Scorpius, sure, was a bit of a do-gooder, but not an obvious one.
God, really. The other biographers out there are just so idiotic, sometimes. Could you really imagine a (weak, slow and nervous) Malfoy chumming with the Potters and Weasleys, who comfort him about his terrible childhood and 'abusive' father while accepting him kindly into their clan (despite warnings from their respective parents that he's up to no good), eventually leading to Malfoy making out with one of the family's brood, emotionally sobbing and stifling back snot-filled tears as he does so since he's just so damn happy that he's finally getting to kiss a Potter/Weasley?
If you can, please go dunk your head in frigid water for a couple seconds. If you still imagine that happening, punch yourself in the head. Repeatedly.
That scenario above? Really never happened.
Scorpius spent four exciting (although traumatic to Headmistress McGonagall) years at Hogwarts, engaging in things from pranking the Fat Lady to only open to the password: "Scorpius Malfoy is a Slytherin Sex God" in first year (to which Draco, receiving a letter from McGonagall indicating what his son had done, burst into laughter, at which Astoria glared at him) to charming Albus Potter's pants to look continuously peed in (to which Albus retaliated by spelling Scorpius' hair blue for a day, which actually fit with Scorpius' edgy appeal) in second year to making Beater on the Slytherin Team in third year (he missed try-outs second year because of detention), helping his team win the House Cup for the first time in eight years. His fourth year … well, it's about to start.
Puberty had Scorpius shoot up to a relatively decent height of 5"10, broadened his shoulders a teensy bit and put muscle where there used to be baby fat. His hair darkened even more, to a medium ash blond, which Scorpius kept in a side-sweep across his forehead, while his nose maintained his aristocratic perfection (but not in a snobby way), and his lips turned a slightly darker shade of peach. His constant vacations to the Caribbean resulted in (if you looked hard enough), a spattering of tiny freckles across his nose, while the rest of his body maintained his creamy tone. Under his clothes, his body became more defined, making the Hogwarts uniform hang devastatingly on his body; and yes, like he had as a child, he still maintained that perfect saggy-assed Londoner private school boy appearance.
Have you ever gone on a social networking site to reconnect with a long-lost friend, just to be amazed at the way that they look simultaneously the same and simultaneously different? Maybe their nose got rounder, they lost weight, or their eyes got smaller. Scorpius got overall more attractive. Yes, it was possible.
You're probably still wondering why Lily Luna Potter was mentioned as being part of this biography.
You'll find out soon enough.
I'm about to take you on a fantastic journey through Scorpius Malfoy's fourth year at Hogwarts. (And hopefully his fifth, sixth, etc.).
Hold on tight.
Signed,
Queen Nightingale
(Your biographer)