Coming Home: Through Flack's Eyes Chapter 1: Reliving the Past Ground Zero, a csi: new york fanfic

AN: I don't own any of the CSI:NY Characters or any of the show's storylines that I may refer to from time to time, but the rest of the plot is mine.

This is kind of an experiment of mine and a companion piece to Coming Home, written from Flack's POV.

1. Reliving the Past / Ground Zero

He caught sight of the woman leaving the elevator. At first he thought he was seeing things. But watching the staff move around her as she paused in the hallway and looked around, he realised this moment was real. She hadn't changed since he last saw her two years before; he decided she looked nervous, something which surprised him a little, but then he never thought she would return to New York, now she was here in the lab. He took a breath and approached her.

She greeted him in a cool tone. She was wary. The last time they were together they hadn't talked, they had yelled at each other until she threw him out and he left her and Amy in California, without even saying goodbye. He knew she was waiting for the backlash, he could see her reaction; he didn't want to fight with her, certainly not here in the lab.

She seemed nervous, scared even. It didn't surprise him. She had fled New York after the towers fell. Her life shattered. Best friends or not she had needed to get away and start over. He would have done anything to keep her, to have helped her through everything, but she got the chance of a job away from the city and she took it. For a year she had said. That was 5 years ago. She hadn't come back at all in that time. She had made a new life, one which hadn't included him, that bond that had kept them close for over 10 years had been shattered with angry words what felt like a lifetime ago.

He asked about Amy and found it hard to accept that she would have come all this way without her. That wasn't like her. Amy had saved her after the move, been the reason for her to keep going. She was everything. To both of them. Don had never admitted it, but he still treasured the times he had spent with them during better times. He had been there when Amy was born, he was there too, when she first walked, on her first birthday.

Memories swirled around his head as they eyed each other suspiciously. He asked why she was back. He watched as she looked away, her eyes on the floor. She mumbled something about dealing with the past. He admired her for that. He tried to do his part and offer an olive branch by asking to meet and talk.

He was desperate not to push her right now, she was clearly struggling to deal with why she came back, it wasn't going to be easy for her, the least he could do was just be there, maybe in the process he could mend some of their broken fences. He'd actually thought a lot about her in the last few months, since the bombing.

She turned him down, he could tell she wasn't ready to deal with their issues yet. She was still dealing with one reason for coming back to the city. He was about to try and persuade her that it would be just that, an opportunity to talk, about anything, when Mac appeared at his elbow and introduced himself to Nikki. He glanced between the two of them and Don knew that he sensed an unspoken friction between them. Don half shrugged as his phone rang and he excused himself.

Finishing the call he walked to the stairway so he didn't have to pass Mac and Nikki still standing by the elevator, now deep in conversation. He would have to catch up with them later, he had to go.

He pulled his car up next to the squad car and got out. It was still quite warm out so he left his jacket on the back seat and closed the door looking first to the area which had been taped off. Then as he turned to cross the park, his eyes were drawn to the empty skyline. His mind replaying the events of that day. He stood for a moment in silent prayer for what he too had lost that day. He did it every time he was called out to a scene downtown. He wished that there was something he could have done. But despite the badge and the motto, they were just as helpless as everyone else in the face of determined terrorists.

A shout from the uniformed officer drew him out of his reverie and he rubbed his face and strode across the park.

After some preliminary work he saw the department SUV pull up with Hawkes behind the wheel. He walked over to them as they got out of the vehicle, he looked at Nikki taking in her pale face and tense look. She glared at him like something on the bottom of her shoe when he asked if she was alright, then she asked about the case. He was concerned when he glanced at Hawkes who looked puzzled and confused.

Don watched as Hawkes and Nikki packed the evidence and her kit back into the vehicle after processing the scene. He saw her step away, move to where a corner of the park gave her a view across to Ground Zero and she stood gazing over towards the site. He paused for a moment but decided that she shouldn't have to do this alone, he went over to her. This was where their problems had begun, where he'd watched her suffer with the tragic consequences of that day 5 years ago. He knew what she was thinking, seeing, he knew she had to do this, but he wanted nothing more than to make everything right again, but he didn't know how. He waited for her to say something, she sighed; she knew he was there. She took a breath and tried to speak, her voice shaky, telling him what he already knew. She couldn't move on until she had put this behind her. She was stuck in a time warp. He understood. He seemed to have moved on, but in truth he had been caught in the ripple effect of that day too. He watched at close hand as the city fell apart, as it started to build itself like a phoenix from the ashes, but somewhere he felt lost too.

He had lost his two best friends. One to the towers and one ... well he didn't quite understand what had happened to Nikki, only that she had lost her future, no longer a newlywed, just back from honeymoon, with plans for a bright future, she was a widow and everything became too much. She had turned up at his checkpoint, sick with worry and like the rest of them covered in layers of dust. He had no words of comfort or news of survivors, She had cried on his shoulder then, an element of relief. Later when he had been allowed home, he found her in the back of a nearby café which had spent the day serving tea to the gathering masses. He found her crushed into a mass of people completely disoriented and scared. He had taken her away, tried to persuade her to go home, but after a quick check proved Jason had not been there, they had left a note and he had taken her home with him.

He sighed and shook his head, forcing himself to go to her, offer her his support once again. He was ready for her to argue with him, but anything would be better than the silent treatment he had seen before.

His nick name for her slipped out before he could stop it. She seemed resigned to everything. Once she would have argued with him about the name. She brushed a tear from her face, shivered and turned heading for the vehicle. He stared at the site for a moment longer, wondering what he could do to help.

A week later he found her preparing to leave the lab. He had watched her in the last week. She was confident in her work, the staff in the lab accepted her. She wasn't mixing well, keeping everyone at arms length. He wasn't surprised. He knew what she was planning to do, they hadn't discussed it, but her timing for coming back told him everything. She was there for the anniversary. Five years had passed, but it still felt like it had just happened sometimes, especially this week. He stopped her, offered to switch shifts, to go with her. She declined, telling him she needed to do it alone. He held out the olive branch again, offering to be there if she needed him, offering to check up on her after. She didn't argue, but didn't accept either. He let her go reluctantly, knowing that she needed to do some of the work herself.

The following day he had spent around the precinct, officially on call, but distracted enough that the only time he wasn't thinking about her was when he forced himself to focus on the pile of files on his desk. It had been a good day for paperwork. His phone rang. A moment later he had abandoned the files and left without a word, finding himself standing outside her door, waiting. He looked up and down the street. Nothing moved. He lowered himself slowly to sit on the step, his eyes fixed on the end of the street knowing that she would be back and would need him. He was grateful for the head's up from Mac. He guessed they had run into each other during the afternoon. Mac was concerned enough to find someone to be there for her, knowing that he still had his own issues to deal with. A yellow cab turned the corner, its headlights piercing the dark street. As it pulled up at the kerb he pulled himself up tiredly. She climbed the steps towards him, he knew she'd question his presence. He tried to reassure her, he knew she wasn't in the mood to talk and that she wouldn't sleep. She looked so lost. She brushed past him and turned around. He twisted in place and reached out for her pulling her close and wrapping his arms around her, holding her trying to give her some reassurance and strength. How he walked away he never knew, a shared look of understanding told each other how they were feeling. They knew the other was there and somehow always would be. He let her go, she needed time to process everything. He knew she would call if she needed him and if she didn't call, he would call her.

My muse demanded that I write this down a few weeks ago. I have two chapters written which could be a companion piece to Coming Home. Please tell me what you think. Would you like more?