50 Ways to Annoy Jacob Black

50. Call him a mutt

49. Call him a dog

48. Ask him if he wants to go for a walk, and when he walks out before you, holler, "Hey wait, you forgot your leash!"

47. Give a bone for his birthday

46. Tell him the time he spent with Bella was pity time

45. Tell him you're going to feed him dinner, and give him dog food.

44. Serve it to him in a dog bowl

43. On Christmas, give him a collar that says, "Fido"

42. Fill his closet with Team Edward shirts

41. Tell him Bella died

40. Tell him Nessie died

39. Laugh when he breaks down crying

38. Buy him a cat named Edward

37. Tell him that real men sparkle

36. Post "Lost Dog" posters around town with his picture on it

35. The first time you meet him, ask if he has had he rabies shots

34. Ask if he bites, and back away slowly

33. Ask him to get you something, and when he brings it back to you tell him, "Good Boy"

32. Ask him if he knows Lassie

31. Ask him if he thinks Air Bud it stuck up

30. Trick him into going to the Cullen house.

29. When he does, whisper to him "Isn't he HOT?" every time Edward walks by

28. Go out to dinner and bring him back a doggie bag

27. Force him to eat the food in it

26. When he is gone hang up a picture a pretty poodle on his wall

25. Ask him what it's like to date the Loch Ness Monster

24. Ask him to sign your yearbook, when he writes his name, yell, " No!!!! I meant your paw print!"

23. Shout in his ears, "Edward Cullen for president!!!!"

22. Dye his hair blonde when he is sleeping.

21. Shout dumb blonde jokes at him.

20. Suggest that he should move Nessie to Scottland so she could feel more at home

19. Tell him to sit if he wants his dinner.

18. Tell him, " No fetch today. We don't like bad dogs."

17. Tell him Bella has something special in store for him and when he goes to see what it is show him that it's a chew toy.

16. Substitute Jacob's name in the Bingo song. Constantly sing "There was a farmer who had a dog and Jacob was his name-o! J-A-C-O-B J-A-C-O-B !!!!!"

15. If he is sitting on the couch tell him, " No! NO dogs on the couch!"

14. When he does something you don't like swat him with a newspaper.

13. Buy him a new dog bed

12. Ask him if Edward dazzles him

11. Ask him if he drinks out of the toilet

10. Call the dog pound when he fazes

9. Pretend you are concerned. Ask him how often he's walked.

8. If he says not much, call animal abuse.

7. Ask him what breed he is so you can look up training techniques

6. Lock him and Edward in a room

5. Sneeze when he's around and your allergies are starting again.

4. Glare at him and say, "It's because of that…"

3. Throw a party for him and play "Who let the dogs out?" the whole time.

2. Tell him dogs are great pets but not boyfriends if he asks you out

1. Remind him that whatever happens with him and Bella, all dogs go to heaven!!!!!!!!!!

A/N

Thank you all for reading!!! I was bored and will not be able to post anymore Fan Fictions for the next week (my business why, you stalkers) and thought this would be funny! I love comments and ALWAYS read them, they all make my day! Thanks to all the people who support and read my stories!

:D

~ Team Edcob 4 Life

PS Have the best time annoying Jacob!!!!