A/N: This was written for the Wedding Bells challenge at the CCOAC forum. My character was Spencer Reid and I was assigned David Rossi; I picked these as my prompts: minister/priest/reverend; gold wedding rings; wedding vows

This is just-for-fun fluff!

Thanks,

Seds

"I can't believe this is happening."

It was late afternoon, and Dave Rossi scrunched down even further in the passenger seat of the rented sedan he was riding in. He continued to stare resentfully out the window, just as he'd been doing continuously for the last thirty minutes.

Derek Morgan was at the wheel, and he chuckled slightly. "Come on, man. It's not like you've never gone under cover before."

"This is a little different."

"Yeah, I get that. Kind of out of your comfort zone, eh?"

"You might say that."

"Well, after today it'll all be over with."

Rossi shifted in his seat and glared at Morgan. "Not necessarily. What if this doesn't work?"

"It'll work! You and Reid fit the victimology perfectly."

"Yeah, well," he said, slumping down again. "I still think Hotch could have done it just as well, if not better."

"Not really. The couples have all been a twenty-something with a much older man."

"Reid's thirty!"

"But he can easily pass for twenty-four, twenty-five. And, you—" Morgan gave Rossi a delicate glance. "Uh, well, you definitely fit the profile," he repeated lamely.

"I do not look sixty!"

"No one's saying that. You just have... that air of maturity about you."

"So does Hotch."

"Not like you, man."

Rossi rolled his eyes and gave an irritable huff. He was quiet for a while as the scenery rolled by, then he suddenly said, "I'm not kissing him!"

"You have to, Dave. This has to look authentic. When the minister says 'The husbands may now kiss,' you gotta do it." He didn't do a very good job of suppressing a grin. "Just a little peck. On the lips."

Rossi groaned. Morgan helpfully added, "You're lucky you're Italian—you guys kiss other guys all the time!"

"Not on the lips!"

"You'll be fine. The one I feel sorry for is Reid, having to smooch somebody with a bristly old mustache like that. He's going to get whisker burn—how's he going to explain that to his mom?"

Rossi shot him a dire look and shook his head. "You are not helping, you know that?"

"Aw, man, come on. What are you, homophobic?"

Stung, Rossi frowned. "Of course not, you know better than that. I've just never been in this kind of situation before. Anyway, the fact that he's a guy isn't what's really bugging me."

"What then?"

"It's Reid! He's like my son, Derek! It's just creepy, that's all." He settled back into silence, but then sat up straight in his seat. "Wait a minute—did you remember the rings?"

"Right here in my pocket," Morgan said, patting his chest. "Will you relax? Now, let's go over your vows again."

"No."

"Rossi, the damn unsub's likely to be right there in the front row where he can hear every word you say. You got to say it like you mean it. Now, come on, how does it start?"

Rossi sighed mightily. "What name did we give him, again?"

"Stanley."

"Oh, yeah, Stanley. All right, let's see—" A slight shudder came over the seasoned agent, but he resolutely began reciting. "Stanley, my love, I—oh, hell, I can't do this."

"Yes, you can! Just pretend he's JJ or something."

Rossi's face wrinkled in disgust. "Uh-uh. There's no way I can think of that skinny little beanpole as a girl!"

"Really? I think he's kind of pretty," Morgan mused.

"Then, you marry him!"

That caused a startled and slightly uncomfortable grimace to cross Morgan's face, but he was careful to hide it from Rossi as he continued his pep talk. "Rossi, come on. We've been planning this for weeks, just do it. Start again—'Stanley, my love..."

"'Stanley, my love, you mean the world to me. You're the love of my life and I am so proud and happy that you want to spend your life with me...' Morgan, I may throw up."

"Keep going."

"'Stanley dearest, I love you, and I vow to be the husband you want, the husband you deserve, for all the days of our lives, and,' oh, my God, et cetera, et cetera. Listen, I've got it, don't worry." Rossi huddled back into himself, looking as though his last bit of energy had been drained by the recitation.

"All right," Morgan said. "That was pretty good, but isn't there something about how when you met him you knew instantly he was the right guy for you, and—"

Rossi weakly waved his hand. "Yeah, yeah, and how I hope someday we can start a family, blah blah blah. Trust me, I've got it."

A wistful feeling came over Morgan, but the small-town Catholic church came into view and he pulled up behind it. Rossi heaved one last beleaguered sigh before stepping out of the car and straightening his tux jacket. Morgan made a quick appraisal of the area, and then hurried inside to take his place, hidden in the choir chancel.

"I can't believe this is happening."

Spencer Reid nervously brushed a lank strand of hair out of his eyes as Garcia carefully tied his bow tie for him. She huffed disparagingly.

"Oh, for heaven's sake. You've been under cover before, what's the big deal?"

"But, I've never been one of the key players, and not with a script. It's like being on stage! All those people watching me... What if I trip or something?"

"You'll be fine, and nobody's going to be there but us, the 'family members,' as played by local law enforcement, the priest... Oh, and the unsub, hopefully. You'll do great."

Reid had a dyspeptic look on his face. "You know we have to kiss?"

Garcia gave him a cheery smile. "Yeah! I'm looking forward to that in particular."

"I've never kissed a man before!"

"You've barely kissed a girl, so just think of it as something to add to your resume."

"I've kissed lots of girls!"

Garcia gave him a look.

"Okay, a few. Well, a couple. Listen, this is different. It's Rossi! He's like my dad! I can't even imagine kissing him."

"You two should have practiced beforehand."

"Oh, God..."

Strains of "The Wedding Song" by Peter, Paul and Mary lilted into the dressing room and Garcia clapped her hands. "Come on, Boy Wonder. Show time."

Everyone was seated, but when Reid and Rossi appeared side by side in the doorway, they all stood up. The two "betrothed" stared at each other for a moment, swallowed hard, and forced smiles onto their faces. They walked down the aisle to take their places in front of a slightly bewildered looking priest.

It all went as planned—vows were said, with Reid stumbling over the words and Rossi sounding a bit strained, but it looked natural. Then, rings were exchanged, with Rossi taking Reid's hand in a grip of death as he slid it over his slender finger, and Reid fumbling as he shakily gave Rossi his, nervous that he would drop the damn thing.

Once that was done, the priest made the happy announcement: "Gentlemen, you may now exchange your first kiss as lawfully wedded husbands." No one could know that Rossi had just gone to his mental happy place with Gina Lollobrigida, circa 1958, and no one saw Morgan where he was hidden, keeping his eyes on the wedding party. No one watched as what felt like a knife stabbing him in the heart caused him to scrunch up his face at the sight of Rossi leaning in to kiss Reid.

It was just then when a man wearing a black hoodie came in from the north transept, brandishing a pistol.

"Stop it!" he cried. "Stop this perverted blasphemy!" A shot rang out and the priest fell to the floor; another shot came on its heels and the unsub was dropped with a bullet through his shoulder, courtesy of Derek Morgan. Hotch came up from where he was seated in a front pew, followed by Prentiss; they had the man in cuffs within seconds.

Both Reid and Rossi were attending to the priest, who'd been outfitted with a bullet-proof vest under his robes. He was stunned, but all right; the local officials had sprung into action, and the urgent sound of sirens instantly filled the air as nearby police cars and an ambulance began converging on the scene.

"Everybody all right?" Morgan asked Reid and Rossi as he re-holstered his gun.

"Yeah, we're fine," Rossi said. He watched the unsub being carried out on a stretcher. "Well, many thanks to the unsub for his timing."

"Huh?" Reid asked, puzzled.

"He saved us from having to kiss, remember?"

"Oh, yeah. That was... good." Reid pursed his lips in a pleased smile and nodded.

Rossi patted Reid's shoulder, said a few congratulatory words to Morgan on his sharp-shooting, and then he strode out, eager to shuck off his wedding garb and catch a ride with Prentiss. By then, everyone else had dispersed, leaving Reid and Morgan standing alone before the altar.

"Well, that was close," Morgan said with a rueful grin.

"What was close?" Reid asked.

"That kiss. I guess you weren't exactly looking forward to it, huh?"

"Oh, no, not really." He stared down at the floor for a moment, adding, "I've never kissed a guy before. It would have been... weird, I guess. Especially since it was Rossi. I have somewhat parental feelings toward him, if anything."

"Yeah." Morgan joined Reid in his examination of the church floor.

"Have you?" Reid asked suddenly, biting his lip as he gave Morgan a sideways glance.

Morgan looked up with a jolt. "Have I what?"

"Ever kissed a man? You know, romantically."

"Oh..." He shrugged uncomfortably. "Well, kind of. I mean, back in college, there were a couple of times when— Guys experiment, sometimes. You know, at a party, after a few drinks and..."

"Oh, right. After a few drinks..." Reid nodded and crossed his arms, regretting having opened this line of discussion.

Morgan studied Reid's face. Could it be? Was he interested? It didn't seem possible, but— "You know, kid... If I was ever going to kiss a man again... it would be you."

A rush of excitement flooded Reid's chest. He met Morgan's eyes. "Really?"

Morgan laughed a little. "Yeah, really. I've been thinking about that, actually." He slowly leaned in, giving Reid ample time to retreat.

But he didn't.

Morgan brushed his lips over Reid's. Reid put one hand on the side of Morgan's face, and then he kissed him again. As their lips parted, Morgan smiled. "Damn. Hey, I'm starving—you want to go to dinner? I... I think we've got some things to discuss."

Reid nodded. "Of course." The two turned and headed up the aisle. Morgan slung an arm around Reid's shoulders, and the younger man hugged him, then grinned impishly. "I do feel a little guilty, though."

Morgan frowned. "Why's that?"

"Well, I am a married man. Do you think Rossi'll be upset that I've already started dating?"

Morgan stopped to open the door. "I think he'll understand. In fact, I bet he'll be relieved."

"I think I'll tell him I'm looking into getting an annulment," Reid said with a devilish wink as he exited. "That should get a rise out of him."

Morgan just laughed, letting the heavy door clang shut behind him. He paused at the end of the sidewalk and looked back at the pretty little church, wondering what it would be like to dress up and walk down an aisle like that with Reid by his side.

"Maybe someday," he thought with a smile, and hurried to join Reid at the car.

P. S. I have been informed that the Catholic Church does not allow same-sex marriages to be performed-oops. For the sake of my sanity (I'm not re-doing this thing, sorry), let's pretend they do, or do the willing suspension of disbelief thing, please... Thank you.